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Jake

@waveturtlejake.bsky.social
1.3K followers 534 following 5.5K posts

Presbyterian

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Jake @waveturtlejake.bsky.social · 20h
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Jake @waveturtlejake.bsky.social · 04/10/2026
Did you know? Aragorn’s famous line “Oh fuck, I just broke my fucking toe on this fucking orc helmet, shit!” was actually not in the script. It was ad-libbed by Vigo Mortinson, who felt that the original line (“Gee wilikers!”) didn’t convey the seriousness of the situation.
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Jake @waveturtlejake.bsky.social · 03/10/2026
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Jake @waveturtlejake.bsky.social · 02/10/2026
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Jake @waveturtlejake.bsky.social · 28/09/2026
Satan
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Jake @waveturtlejake.bsky.social · 28/09/2026
Sin Rat
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Jake @waveturtlejake.bsky.social · 28/09/2026
Taron Edgerton
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Jake @waveturtlejake.bsky.social · 28/09/2026
Spiked punk
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Jake @waveturtlejake.bsky.social · 28/09/2026
Oliphant
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Jake @waveturtlejake.bsky.social · 28/09/2026
Prideful small bear
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Jake @waveturtlejake.bsky.social · 28/09/2026
Oafish boar
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Jake @waveturtlejake.bsky.social · 28/09/2026
Rude sheep
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Jake @waveturtlejake.bsky.social · 28/09/2026
This thread 🧵 👇 Animals from the movie “Sing” that I would eat if given the opportunity.
Musical pig
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Jake @waveturtlejake.bsky.social · 26/09/2026
King
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Jake @waveturtlejake.bsky.social · 26/09/2026
I love how the Onion Robert Pattinson interview mostly just sounds like things he would actually say in a real interview.
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Jake @waveturtlejake.bsky.social · 23/09/2026
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Jake @waveturtlejake.bsky.social · 20/09/2026
Bought a game bundle and ended up with an extra Steam key for Dread Delusion, a rad little weird fantasy game in a super distinct world with clear Morrowind inspirations. Free to the first person to ask for it, loved this game.
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Jake @waveturtlejake.bsky.social · 19/09/2026
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Jake @waveturtlejake.bsky.social · 19/09/2026
Taylor Lorenz PragerU video dropping any day now.
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Jake @waveturtlejake.bsky.social · 17/09/2026
U.S. History students 100 years when they finish reading Harry Potter and the Methods of Rationality and then the professor asks them to locate Yud on the Birthday Chart.
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Jake @waveturtlejake.bsky.social · 16/09/2026
Last year some guy tried to make an AI Werner Herzog film and they asked Herzog about it yesterday, his answer was so good:
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Jake @waveturtlejake.bsky.social · 15/09/2026
*Teacher voice* Thank you for sharing CNN. I’d like to hear from somebody else now.
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Jake @waveturtlejake.bsky.social · 14/09/2026
Another weird 2000’s thing I just remembered: Fireproof, the Kirk Cameron movie about a firefighter who can’t stop watching pornography on the dining room computer.
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Jake @waveturtlejake.bsky.social · 14/09/2026
On that same album he has a song about his ex-wife where he just stops rapping and plainly states that she was just like the 9/11 hijackers.
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Jake @waveturtlejake.bsky.social · 14/09/2026
The 200s were a weird time.
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Jake @waveturtlejake.bsky.social · 10/09/2026
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Jake @waveturtlejake.bsky.social · 07/09/2026
So, you logged onto Bluesky and said something positive about Harry Potter.
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Jake @waveturtlejake.bsky.social · 06/09/2026
Got to see Neil Breen’s newest film in a packed theater last night. Unironically the best theater experience I’ve ever had.
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Jake @waveturtlejake.bsky.social · 06/09/2026
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Jake @waveturtlejake.bsky.social · 06/09/2026
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Jake @waveturtlejake.bsky.social · 03/09/2026
“Sean Lennon is a dad to former Beatle John’s first grandson”
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Jake @waveturtlejake.bsky.social · 03/09/2026
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Jake @waveturtlejake.bsky.social · 03/09/2026
What
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Jake @waveturtlejake.bsky.social · 02/09/2026
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Jake @waveturtlejake.bsky.social · 02/09/2026
Without saying your age, what is your favorite movie that came out it when you were 20 years old? (Absolutely terrifying. I’ve never been so afraid in my life.)
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Jake @waveturtlejake.bsky.social · 31/08/2026
“Come to church with me, I promise it’s not weird.” The church the day you visit:
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Jake @waveturtlejake.bsky.social · 30/08/2026
Wrote about this for an essay collection that got published. Basically, there was a perception that theaters in general catered to vice. And a lot of the fundamentalists had a kind of anti-recreation bent, they also denounced sports and cards and board games.
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Jake @waveturtlejake.bsky.social · 29/08/2026
Famous tradwife Dale Partridge.
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Jake @waveturtlejake.bsky.social · 29/08/2026
My wife going with me to the cashier to tell them I ordered a five piece tender meal, not a three piece.
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Jake @waveturtlejake.bsky.social · 29/08/2026
Okay I know we do this discourse every two weeks but guys, it absolutely should not cost the same amount to eat out as to cook at home. If you’re spending as much money cooking one meal as you would at a restaurant, you are bad with money in a way you need to deal with before it ruins your life.
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Jake @waveturtlejake.bsky.social · 27/08/2026
Ordering a salad in 2026
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Jake @waveturtlejake.bsky.social · 23/08/2026
At Applebees
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Jake @waveturtlejake.bsky.social · 23/08/2026
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Jake @waveturtlejake.bsky.social · 19/08/2026
How is this real
Dan Patrick holding a book called “Do Animals Fall in Love?”
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Jake @waveturtlejake.bsky.social · 17/08/2026
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Jake @waveturtlejake.bsky.social · 16/08/2026
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Jake @waveturtlejake.bsky.social · 16/08/2026
Not a movie but
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Jake @waveturtlejake.bsky.social · 10/08/2026
They enshitified ClassDojo. It’s a subscription service with micro transactions now.
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Jake @waveturtlejake.bsky.social · 08/08/2026
This guy is the worst offender. There are like 25 kids in his entire school. He has nothing useful to say to public educators and racks up TikTok views by pretending otherwise. 
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Jake @waveturtlejake.bsky.social · 08/08/2026
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