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Learned Hand Jr.

@wassicaboamouse.bsky.social
74 followers 139 following 781 posts

I fight for ur right to party, im an absolute dipshit!!!

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Learned Hand Jr. @wassicaboamouse.bsky.social · 14/10/2026
It’s so funny that Katie Zacharia is functionally illiterate. She’s 41 (or 42) years old! I’m not saying law students are geniuses but I don’t know how you get your JD (assuming no cheating/bribing) w/o being able to read or do public speaking at least somewhat competently!
Katie Black was born in 1984 or 1985. She attended Pepperdine University graduating from its liberal arts college in 2007 and from its law school in 2011
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Learned Hand Jr. @wassicaboamouse.bsky.social · 14/10/2026
Ini Kamoze: “I’m the lyrical gangsta” Oh hell yeah sweet, can’t wait to hear your gangsta lyrics! “Da da da dada, dadadada da da da da da dah, dadadada!” What the fuck?!?! 😡
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Learned Hand Jr. @wassicaboamouse.bsky.social · 11/10/2026
I’ve never forgiven Minkah Firzpatrick for the hit on Nick Chubb’s knee, now Concepcion, man
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Learned Hand Jr. @wassicaboamouse.bsky.social · 10/10/2026
Next up on Jubilee: 1 normal person (me) vs. 20 weird freaks. My first point: trans in sports? Who fucken cares?! Let em play man 20 people shoving each other over, biting, clawing, scrambling for the opposite chair, mouths frothing, rabid
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Learned Hand Jr. @wassicaboamouse.bsky.social · 06/10/2026
How about a reboot set in Nola titled Hustle and Fleaux huh how about that
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Learned Hand Jr. @wassicaboamouse.bsky.social · 03/10/2026
I suppose the evidence for people living in delusional alternative internet reality has been there for us all to see for a while. Go watch a couple full game replays of 2011 Denver broncos games on YouTube, skip to the comment section, and read what people say about Tim tebow’s qb play lmao
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Learned Hand Jr. @wassicaboamouse.bsky.social · 28/09/2026
Bo FRENCH?!?! No thanks homie id rather have Bo FREEDOM hell yeh hell yeh hell yeh
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Learned Hand Jr. @wassicaboamouse.bsky.social · 13/09/2026
On the plus side, the official NFL app not functioning on opening weekend has saved me from the horrible fate of watching the NFL today, because watching the Browns is actually a self-imposed punishment in an otherwise enjoyable life
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Learned Hand Jr. @wassicaboamouse.bsky.social · 13/09/2026
It’s bad to argue that some free Americans should have fewer rights than others. It’s my red line. Since that premise (fewer rights for some) is a load-bearing leg of GOP politics, I do not vote for them. If it becomes part of a platform for Dem politicians, I will not vote for them either. Simple.
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Learned Hand Jr. @wassicaboamouse.bsky.social · 11/09/2026
Id say it was in the month after 9/11 that was the first time I realized, like really knew for sure, that almost all of the adults in my small rural town in the middle of nowhere were actually out of their minds
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Learned Hand Jr. @wassicaboamouse.bsky.social · 20/08/2026
change 1 letter in a video game title to make it better Dick Hunt
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Learned Hand Jr. @wassicaboamouse.bsky.social · 18/08/2026
1 really incredible sub-point is that 3M’s counsel retained a guy who had NEVER BEEN QUALIFIED AS AN EXPERT WITNESS BEFORE! I’ve never retained an expert witness who hasn’t at least testified before. And I’ve only worked at small to mid-sized PI firms, not exactly dealing w/ a 3M lit budget here!
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Learned Hand Jr. @wassicaboamouse.bsky.social · 09/08/2026
Relying on AI to make these garbage facebook Looney Tunes and Peanuts cartoons is atrophying our brains - sloppy, lazy, lacking any spark, messaging tailored to senior citizens - we must RETVRN to our meme fundamentals
Bugs bunny with the piece, eyes cast down, repenting in advance for the badass sin he’s about to commit, text above and below saying “Lord forgive me but it’s time to go back to the old me”Daffy Duck with a sideways hat holding the biggest blunt ever made, iced out chain on, text above and below saying “never believed in magic until I saw my dog turn into a snake “
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Learned Hand Jr. @wassicaboamouse.bsky.social · 03/08/2026
It’s happened more than once today where I get excited for a second bc I think we’re all talking about Mac Miller and then immediately disappointed for several reasons.
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Learned Hand Jr. @wassicaboamouse.bsky.social · 02/08/2026
Balto PD respond after a break-in. All electronics had been grabbed. Cop says I should check local pawn shops to see if anything shows up. I point to the window that had clearly been forced open & say “shouldn’t you dust for prints?” He shrugs & says “I will if you really want me to.”
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Learned Hand Jr. @wassicaboamouse.bsky.social · 01/08/2026
Listening to the Twins-Mariners game and the broadcaster mentioned that the Os have traded Dean Kremer? Haven’t seen anything about it yet but it could’ve *just* happened
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Learned Hand Jr. @wassicaboamouse.bsky.social · 01/08/2026
Im seeing a lotta memes lately of like Charlie Brown at a laundromat making a sad face, saying “abandoned malls could be turned into assisted living centers & the economy would be measured by how many elderly people eat at the repurposed Cinnabon…” while Snoopy is nodding & crying a single tear.
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Learned Hand Jr. @wassicaboamouse.bsky.social · 26/07/2026
can’t imagine any of them will be punished for their crimes but i swear, if at the end of all this, the only member of the Trump family that sees prison time is Barron and its for like conspiracy or something bc he responded to a Tate brother’s text about human trafficking with “yeah based”
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Learned Hand Jr. @wassicaboamouse.bsky.social · 26/07/2026
O’s with a walkoff win against one of the best teams in baseball after taking them into extras yesterday has me believing in a late season push! They have to make a couple moves before the deadline tho if they really want to have a shot at playoffs
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Learned Hand Jr. @wassicaboamouse.bsky.social · 26/07/2026
A recent movie taught me it’s wrong to instantly kill people who have done nothing wrong but are simply poor, hungry, or otherwise in need of help, even if theyre not immediate family, or i dont already know them! I believe this newfound knowledge makes me woke now
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Learned Hand Jr. @wassicaboamouse.bsky.social · 24/07/2026
Give me the Rat. Hes all you need. You should probably invest in some type of face shield though, to avoid any viscera from his victims getting in your eyes.
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Learned Hand Jr. @wassicaboamouse.bsky.social · 22/07/2026
As close as you’re gonna see me get to a religious experience when the humming hits
youtube.com
Songs: Chicago - Old Black Hen
YouTube video by Dustin Park
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Learned Hand Jr. @wassicaboamouse.bsky.social · 22/07/2026
I'm sorry but didn't the Supreme Court recently decide that unilaterally imposing tariffs without Congressional approval was unconstitutional? What are we even doing here anymore I'm sorry but didn't the Supreme Court recently decide that unilaterally imposing tariffs without Congressional approva
I'm sorry but didn't the Supreme Court recently decide that unilaterally imposing tariffs without Congressional approval was unconstitutional?

What are we even doing here anymore

I'm sorry but didn't the Supreme Court recently decide that unilaterally imposing tariffs without Congressional approval was unconstitutional?

What are we even doing here anymore
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Learned Hand Jr. @wassicaboamouse.bsky.social · 21/07/2026
What a finish to the O’s game - thought they were gonna take the lead before that snag late, but the fact that they had 4 errors and still had a chance at the end is pretty impressive especially against Boston’s super red hot team
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Learned Hand Jr. @wassicaboamouse.bsky.social · 21/07/2026
Right wing freaks wishing Nolan had cast more tall, “real” Greeks in The Odyssey, the monkey’s paw slowly curls, now Giannis Antetokounmpo is Telemachus bitch
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Learned Hand Jr. @wassicaboamouse.bsky.social · 19/07/2026
The Odyssey whips ass man it’s so fucken cool, they cut a few parts out from the story of course bc the movie can’t be 6 hours but it ruled 10/10 would recommend (saw it on IMAX screen)
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Learned Hand Jr. @wassicaboamouse.bsky.social · 18/07/2026
Going w/ the wife to tomorrow’s 7:30AM IMAX showing of The Odyssey. IMO, AM movie theater visits are the best bc 1. Smaller crowds; and 2. By the time it’s over, it’s still the morning and most of the day remains ahead of me!
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Learned Hand Jr. @wassicaboamouse.bsky.social · 18/07/2026
Have I seen The Odyssey? 👉👈 No…I haven’t yet watched any youtube video from one of the weirdest most friendless freaks alive, so I don’t know if im allowed to go see the worldwide blockbuster or if its too woke / trans….after all, what if I were to go and accidentally have a single second of fun! 😖
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Learned Hand Jr. @wassicaboamouse.bsky.social · 18/07/2026
Rewatching Twin Peaks for the first time since it originally ran on tv, I forgot how awful, insufferable, deranged every single teenage character in the show is (except for Laura’s best friend).
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Learned Hand Jr. @wassicaboamouse.bsky.social · 17/07/2026
I was offline & indoors most of today so when I finally went outside a few min ago I was like shit it’s foggy?? In the evening?? but dear reader it is NOT fog shrouding DC, and the air quality is pretty fucked rn
Washington DC 
91 degrees
Sunny
Air Quality Alert
182 - Unhealthy
WaPo News headline: Thick wildfire smoke shrouds DC area, causing unhealthy air quality….
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Learned Hand Jr. @wassicaboamouse.bsky.social · 17/07/2026
I heard Hunter Biven, George Soros & the RADICAL LEFT brought the screw worms into the country from jails, insane asylums - the worst of the worst - & that they are trying to destroy this country (which was a dead country & now is the hottest country) by putting screw worms on MAIL IN BALLOTS!!!
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Learned Hand Jr. @wassicaboamouse.bsky.social · 15/07/2026
Banging on a stall of the public restroom, asking the occupant if he has “doodoo sickness,” desperately scrabbling at the door, peeking an eye through crack between door and wall, 100% for public safety Hes trapped in the stall, cornered! Doodoo sickness not spreading here
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Learned Hand Jr. @wassicaboamouse.bsky.social · 14/07/2026
A 9 hour dramatic adaptation of Das Kapital with camera work & visual effects just like in Inception. in 1 scene Marx is sitting at his table writing when suddenly he flips a coin and it lands perfectly on its side and he goes “now das kapital!” and theres a laugh track just for that part
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Learned Hand Jr. @wassicaboamouse.bsky.social · 14/07/2026
Not the main point but it’s the flippant way he described it as the “January 6 thing” when it’s like brother that “THING” made you into an oathbreaker, it made you a traitor lmao!
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Learned Hand Jr. @wassicaboamouse.bsky.social · 09/07/2026
Only 2 types of youtube music video/song comment anymore: 1. Who here in 20XX?? 2. My mother sang this to me everyday when we hiked the Appalachian Trial. She lost her battle to cancer 5 yrs ago. I think of her whenever I hear this song. Love you mom 😢 Whiplash when theyre right next to each other
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Learned Hand Jr. @wassicaboamouse.bsky.social · 08/07/2026
maybe confirmation bias, as im a PI lawyer, but i cant help but notice a significant rise in rear-end crashes these past ~2 yrs with cars being struck while stopped at red lights/stop signs, it seems to correlate with the fact that most new cars come with fucken big screen tvs mounted on the dashes!
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Learned Hand Jr. @wassicaboamouse.bsky.social · 07/07/2026
Was it by seance or ouija board? Was a medium involved? Was Thune in the middle of a pottery-making session during this communication? Did John Edwards get any parts of this conversation on camera? (on account of Mitch being dead)
Update on Mitch McConnell: “Thune spoke with him yesterday”
MS NOW
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Learned Hand Jr. @wassicaboamouse.bsky.social · 03/07/2026
Over $2bb in profits this year? About $1.4bb in crypto alone?? I know others have said similar things but this guy is basically running the Bernie Madoff playbook, except instead of working in secret, he’s having national daily press conferences about how he’s doing it
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Learned Hand Jr. @wassicaboamouse.bsky.social · 03/07/2026
Whenever I need a little pick-me-up I’ll just put on a 5min or so youtube video of Mike Alstott turning dbs into roadkill and i feel better!
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Learned Hand Jr. @wassicaboamouse.bsky.social · 01/07/2026
finally had a chance to read the opinions in Trump v. Barbara, the birthright citizenship case. I don’t hear many people talking about one of the more controversial statements in the Alito dissent, when he says, and I quote: “i shitted doodoo out of my but-whole” Shameful 😔 😡
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Learned Hand Jr. @wassicaboamouse.bsky.social · 01/07/2026
Mr Mucus says “TRANS RIGHTS” babyyyyy
A stuffie of Mr Mucus and a pride flag in a cup full of pens and pencils on a desk. Mr Mucus is probably aroace? but I don’t want to start an argument about it so ill just say im not sure
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Learned Hand Jr. @wassicaboamouse.bsky.social · 30/06/2026
Alternate narrative - 44.44% of the Supreme Court have clearly abandoned the oaths they’ve sworn to support and defend the Constitution. Many Constitutional question are arguable, or open to interpretation, but birthright citizenship is not one of them!
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Learned Hand Jr. @wassicaboamouse.bsky.social · 29/06/2026
lmao look I think weve got enough data points to establish that if you love donald trump in 2026 there’s better than a coin-flip’s chance youre either a white supremacist neonazi freak who doesnt deserve the comforts of civil society or youre a deranged sex pervert, or both!
Daily Beast headline ready “MAGA Fanatic Accused of Twisted Sex Acts at Trump’s ‘State Fair.’ Lewd and Rude.’ Look, i wouldnt normally consider calling masturbation a ‘twisted sex act’ but this guy’s a freak! slappin his little nubbin around to circus performers in front of everyone is real ‘watchlist’ behaviorExcerpt from the story about how one of these Trump guys was jorkin his peanus to a troupe of female circus performersThe pud slammer came back for seconds?? deranged behavior, asylum type behavior, the type of behavior that used to get people lobotomizedThere was a 3rd witness to the cranking-off! How many people was this guy around, Jesus! Wont somebody think of the children?!
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Learned Hand Jr. @wassicaboamouse.bsky.social · 28/06/2026
Democrats are getting everything they’ve ever said they’ve wanted (an excited and engaged base of support that is actually turning out to vote, a stable of young political talents that can communicate with the younger generation, increased fundraising) and they’re hating every second of it lol.
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Learned Hand Jr. @wassicaboamouse.bsky.social · 28/06/2026
This Great American State Fair sounds like such a fucken dud, kinda want to go check it out since I didn’t see the UFC claw monstrosity but cant even justify the 20 minute drive with what little morbid curiosity I feel about it.
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Learned Hand Jr. @wassicaboamouse.bsky.social · 27/06/2026
Gracie the Giraffe did it for attention. She’s this mini-generation’s Balloon Boy. For this, she should be roundly condemned 😡
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Learned Hand Jr. @wassicaboamouse.bsky.social · 27/06/2026
I think democratic socialism can do good things for people like fix the roads and help poor people take care of their kids and help provide food and shelter for hungry people. I think it’s fine to support people who are trying to make your life better. I’m the most dangerous person alive!!
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Learned Hand Jr. @wassicaboamouse.bsky.social · 27/06/2026
these guys need a good name for their club. Like The Squad, ya know? Hmm…let’s see…They probably LOVE reaching across the aisle, being BIPARTISAN & INSPIRATIONAL. Maybe named after R’s & D’s with a shared history? I’ve got it! They should name their little team the R Budd Dwyer Vincent Foster Group!
Washington Post skeet that says “thirteen democratic house members and candidates announced their support for a centrist initiative aimed at pushing back against the party’s tilt toward democratic socialism” and the picture is of a big butt in a suit and tie and the butt is farting and some poop is coming out of the butt cheeks
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Learned Hand Jr. @wassicaboamouse.bsky.social · 27/06/2026
lmao this shit looks like it sucks ass! Glad I didn’t go downtown to check it out - I’d probably puke my fucken guts out cause of how much ass this shit sucks!
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Learned Hand Jr. @wassicaboamouse.bsky.social · 27/06/2026
Is there a reason a solid 20% of posts on my feed regularly are pictures of people’s old ass dead/almost-dead pets? I love animals as much as the next guy but kinda a downer to see a post of a 26 y/o cat on life support where it says like “goodbye Mittens, sorry you died just now, 5 seconds ago :((“
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