Walter T Panda - Official @waltertpanda.bsky.social · 4hEarly Access games will come out and the developers start frantically replacing the code line by line. Theseus as a Service in here. 000
Walter T Panda - Official @waltertpanda.bsky.social · 11/10/2026I thought my phone was telling me I used a TB of data, but it was just a MyChart diagnosis. 010
Walter T Panda - Official @waltertpanda.bsky.social · 10/10/2026Here's a handy tip. Crows are fry scream, ravens are false chord. 000
Walter T Panda - Official @waltertpanda.bsky.social · 10/10/2026Hey, Grok, what's the cheapest way to join the Discords of all my favorite Japanese YouTube silent travel vloggers and get them on the same train? 000
Walter T Panda - Official @waltertpanda.bsky.social · 07/10/2026McDonalds should do a Halloween themed eloté called the McCob. 000
Walter T Panda - Official @waltertpanda.bsky.social · 06/10/2026If you wake up in a dream, you wake up in real life. 000
Walter T Panda - Official @waltertpanda.bsky.social · 05/10/2026The American Kennel Consortium has announced its newest recognized breed, the American Gun Dog (Canine Millimeter), which us sure to pop some 'howl' points in the competition this holiday season! 000
Walter T Panda - Official @waltertpanda.bsky.social · 04/10/2026The state of record collecting in the US. Thanks a lot, you orange turd. 010
Walter T Panda - Official @waltertpanda.bsky.social · 04/10/2026I've already imagined your AI startup logo as a goatse. 001
Walter T Panda - Official @waltertpanda.bsky.social · 27/09/2026They paved the Pickle Ball court and put up a parking lot. La lala. 000
Walter T Panda - Official @waltertpanda.bsky.social · 26/09/2026Instead of 2 factor authentication, my job has it so if you log out you die. So secure. 000
Walter T Panda - Official @waltertpanda.bsky.social · 26/09/2026Officer, I swear I was just cleaning my guillotine and it went off. 000
Walter T Panda - Official @waltertpanda.bsky.social · 23/09/2026in a haunted house and the only flash light I have is the led on my disposable vape 000
Walter T Panda - Official @waltertpanda.bsky.social · 18/09/2026Hot take: if you drive a #Tesla, you can't say shit about #Flock cameras. You 👏 drive 👏 one 👏. 001
Walter T Panda - Official @waltertpanda.bsky.social · 16/09/2026How do I decorate my house if I'm really into pineapples but not into wife swapping? 000
Walter T Panda - Official @waltertpanda.bsky.social · 27/08/2026Breaking News I Made up: The video game industry has successfully become an ouroboros! Microsoft and Bethesda have confirmed that Elder Scrolls 6 will initially release as a Remaster. 000
Walter T Panda - Official @waltertpanda.bsky.social · 20/08/2026What's a guy gotta do to get Isekai'd to ancient times these days? Please respond. 000
Walter T Panda - Official @waltertpanda.bsky.social · 19/08/2026I just bought some lactose pills, so just like Pennywise, I'm fucking with dairy again. 000
Walter T Panda - Official @waltertpanda.bsky.social · 12/08/2026Sometimes I think about how if you've ever used Facebook on the toilet or been naked near a Tesla, a billionaire has pictures of your genitals and that's just beautiful. 000
Walter T Panda - Official @waltertpanda.bsky.social · 12/08/2026Donald Trump is the JD Vance of pedo sex traffickers. 000
Walter T Panda - Official @waltertpanda.bsky.social · 06/08/2026I heard a little tip from my friend who works at KFC. If you're sick of using your mouth to pump out the fryer grease, wrap your hands in cheesecloth and fish around in there. Just be sure to cool it down with some ice cubes first! 000
Walter T Panda - Official @waltertpanda.bsky.social · 06/08/2026Humans are just a support system for a tube that turns things into shit. 000
Walter T Panda - Official @waltertpanda.bsky.social · 06/08/2026If the Insane Clown Posse and the band Mayhem had concerts across the street from each other, it would be like the pandas and the zebras seeing each other at the zoo. Respectively. 000
Walter T Panda - Official @waltertpanda.bsky.social · 04/08/2026You can find wedding bands on Etsy made of pretty much anything. I found one the other day made of my dog's ashes. Whish-listed it. 000
Walter T Panda - Official @waltertpanda.bsky.social · 31/07/2026It's too bad the SCART cable never really took off. It's such a fun word to say! 000
Walter T Panda - Official @waltertpanda.bsky.social · 24/07/2026In mother Russia, cock wants you! 000
Walter T Panda - Official @waltertpanda.bsky.social · 23/07/2026I told my AI girlfriend the only way I can get off is if she hacks a Chinese server. The nut is in her court now. 000
Walter T Panda - Official @waltertpanda.bsky.social · 20/07/2026New series idea: Gordon Ramsay's Straight to Hell. Gordon has one week to live. Can he successfully relaunch a restaurant before he passes on? Find out this summer on Foxamount+. 000
Walter T Panda - Official @waltertpanda.bsky.social · 17/07/2026I have the Benjamin Button disease, but I started at like 45. 000
Walter T Panda - Official @waltertpanda.bsky.social · 17/07/2026Hangovers are like migraines plus stolen valor. 000
Walter T Panda - Official @waltertpanda.bsky.social · 10/07/2026I put all my beef up as collateral on a bet and now I have steaks at stake. 000
Walter T Panda - Official @waltertpanda.bsky.social · 09/07/2026I just spoke with Mitch McConnell for 20 minutes. It sounded like someone reinstalling Windows on Darth Vader, but he's in good spirits! Well, a spirit... 000
Walter T Panda - Official @waltertpanda.bsky.social · 09/07/2026It's ironic that the most depressing app on my phone is called BlueSky. Maybe I'll download one that reminds me I'm lonely by showing me my happy neighbors called GreenerGrass. 000
Walter T Panda - Official @waltertpanda.bsky.social · 08/07/2026Flirtation and filtration are basically the same words and I think that's beautiful. 000
Walter T Panda - Official @waltertpanda.bsky.social · 04/07/2026Happy birthday, america! I'll be celebrating by sneaking up behind all the veterans in my neighborhood and screaming 'thank you for your service' in different foreign accents. If you're in a rush, a few well-timed fireworks can 'honor' them all at once. Follow me for more time saving tips! 000
Walter T Panda - Official @waltertpanda.bsky.social · 03/07/2026I get these kinds of replies on MyChart, too. Is that bad? 000
Walter T Panda - Official @waltertpanda.bsky.social · 03/07/2026We should be allowed to call corporations slurs. 100
Walter T Panda - Official @waltertpanda.bsky.social · 30/06/2026My favorite brand on Amazon is probably [indiscernible capital letters]. They seem to make everything I want! 000
Walter T Panda - Official @waltertpanda.bsky.social · 28/06/2026I get a little excited when my medications change shape. It's like collecting pokemon. I got a shiny Lisinopril! 000
Walter T Panda - Official @waltertpanda.bsky.social · 28/06/2026I'm not 'constantly interrupting you with goofs', it's called active listening. 000
Walter T Panda - Official @waltertpanda.bsky.social · 26/06/2026I was watching an episode of Hotel Hell and they cut to a stream, but the YouTube compression made it unwatchable. Maybe it was actually a RARing stream... 000
Walter T Panda - Official @waltertpanda.bsky.social · 24/06/2026Televangelists: "I ain't Christian, but 20 bucks is 20 bucks." 000
Walter T Panda - Official @waltertpanda.bsky.social · 15/06/2026If ghosts were real, every boss I've ever had would have given me a goose on Christmas morning. 000
Walter T Panda - Official @waltertpanda.bsky.social · 14/06/2026I'm not 'constantly interrupting you with goofs', it's called active listening. 000
Walter T Panda - Official @waltertpanda.bsky.social · 13/06/2026Meeting the alien from Contact: Voice of my dad, "hey, could you like describe me?" #Aphantasia 000
Walter T Panda - Official @waltertpanda.bsky.social · 12/06/2026My watch flashing its little green light when I take it off.static.klipy.comDachshund's First Dip in WaterAlt: Dachshund being held above shallow water feebly kicking its legs. This dummy thinks he needs to swim, but he ain't even in the water. Smh.. 000
Walter T Panda - Official @waltertpanda.bsky.social · 11/06/2026Watching 90's/2000's wrestling: "Man, this guy's good. Why don't I remember him from anything later on? Aw, that's a shame." 000
Walter T Panda - Official @waltertpanda.bsky.social · 02/06/2026Times are tough, man. The tooth fairy just left my great godson a bill for her mileage under his pillow. 000