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evan

@wakeupevan.bsky.social
916 followers 393 following 623 posts

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evan @wakeupevan.bsky.social · 03/10/2026
me & my 9 albums 🤭
me in a red sweater with a white dress shirt underneath, the collar is poking out from the sweater and i’m looking straight at the cameramy nine albums in order: everybody scream by florence and the machine, so jealous by tegan & sara, halcyon by ellie goulding, surrender by maggie rogers, somewhere else by lydia loveless, melodrama by lorde, i never learn by lykke li, 21 by adele, and hold the girl by rina sawayama
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evan @wakeupevan.bsky.social · 30/09/2026
it’s time for fall y’all…
me in a purple tie-dye beetlejuice hoodie and black shorts and white converse, standing with my hands on my hips next to a sign with a cartoon pumpkin and a board with measurements on it. the sign says “How tall this fall?” and i measure a little over the 6 foot mark.
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evan @wakeupevan.bsky.social · 11/09/2026
already it’s #fcf again?
me standing in the mirror wearing only my glasses, my dick is meaty but not hard me standing in the mirror wearing only my glasses, my dick is hard in this one
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evan @wakeupevan.bsky.social · 07/09/2026
i just think it’s neat
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evan @wakeupevan.bsky.social · 07/09/2026
i’m getting distracted 🤦🏻‍♀️
my dick is hard, my balls are hanging low, my bush is bushy
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evan @wakeupevan.bsky.social · 02/09/2026
i show my bravery through taking selfies in portrait mode
me in a burgundy sweater with a white button up shirt underneath, the collar of the shirt is poking out of the sweater. i have wavy side-parted dark brown hair, a mustache and short beard, and i’m looking straight at the camera.
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evan @wakeupevan.bsky.social · 28/08/2026
quote with the oldest nude in your camera roll! november 2017 was the oldest i could find (i was 21) happy #fcf!
me laying in a bathtub showing off my dick
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evan @wakeupevan.bsky.social · 27/08/2026
whatever here’s a softie and some balls
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evan @wakeupevan.bsky.social · 19/08/2026
happy happy #humpday
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evan @wakeupevan.bsky.social · 13/08/2026
is anybody else the designated emotional regulator to their narcissistic family
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evan @wakeupevan.bsky.social · 11/08/2026
i don’t wanna go antiquing but i think we’re gonna go antiquing……
me standing in the mirror wearing a white cutoff t shirt, light jeans and glasses
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evan @wakeupevan.bsky.social · 11/08/2026
uh ohhhh
picture of my hard dick poking through my boxers
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evan @wakeupevan.bsky.social · 09/08/2026
bought new glasses (again) and they’re reminiscent of the glasses i had ten years ago did we do it did we “glow up”
me in 2016 half smiling at the camera in a button up light wash denim shirt in browline glasses. my hair is a short textured crop and i have a beardme in 2026 half smiling at the camera in a black hoodie in browline glasses. my hair is a bit longer and side-parted, and i have a mustache
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evan @wakeupevan.bsky.social · 08/08/2026
so i played the three bonus prequel missions in halo campaign evolved
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evan @wakeupevan.bsky.social · 07/08/2026
reposting this for #fcf 🙂‍↕️
my hairy hard dick and balls, also a good view of my happy trail
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evan @wakeupevan.bsky.social · 05/08/2026
day drunk(ish) and doing laundry bc my mood is WACK and a lot of stressful things are happening around me (not TO me) and this album is literally saving my mentality rn
Laura Mvula’s album Sing to the Moon
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evan @wakeupevan.bsky.social · 28/07/2026
GOING✈️HILARY DUFF :D
me standing in the mirror in a white ringer tee with the sleeves cut off and some jean shorts
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evan @wakeupevan.bsky.social · 27/07/2026
AREN’T I PRETTY ENOUGH FOR MORE THAN FUN IN THE DAAAAARK
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evan @wakeupevan.bsky.social · 27/07/2026
i shaved all of my body hair off and i’m doing a face mask i actually done a healing
mirror shot of me shirtless in camo sweatpants, i have a green clay mask on and headband pulling back my hair
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evan @wakeupevan.bsky.social · 26/07/2026
ok ok okayyyuh
hairy dick and balls
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evan @wakeupevan.bsky.social · 20/07/2026
finally called off work THREE DAY WEEKEND WOOOOO
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evan @wakeupevan.bsky.social · 09/07/2026
she was so well behaved for her haircut 🤗 i did it myself so be fucking nice to her
my dog tilly, a white scruffy little dog who just got a haircut and behaved very well
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evan @wakeupevan.bsky.social · 08/07/2026
just got back from the pool happy #humpday
my somewhat hairy ass with a peek at some pit and balls
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evan @wakeupevan.bsky.social · 07/07/2026
i’m going out does anyone need anything
me standing in the mirror wearing a black rolling stones tee with the sleeves cut off and black jeans
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evan @wakeupevan.bsky.social · 07/07/2026
NED!-
chick fil a girl gagged and gooped
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evan @wakeupevan.bsky.social · 06/07/2026
i should’ve called off
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evan @wakeupevan.bsky.social · 05/07/2026
just sneezed 8 times in a row and it made me so much drunker (more drunk??)
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evan @wakeupevan.bsky.social · 05/07/2026
i think the sturniolo triplets are cute and I’d smooch the gay one goodbye
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evan @wakeupevan.bsky.social · 05/07/2026
both of my brothers have receding hairlines five of my cousins have receding hairlines and another cousin just shaved his head bald
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evan @wakeupevan.bsky.social · 01/07/2026
the beard is ✨gone✨
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evan @wakeupevan.bsky.social · 30/06/2026
back from the pool y’all it’s hot as HELL outside
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evan @wakeupevan.bsky.social · 28/06/2026
good morning.
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evan @wakeupevan.bsky.social · 28/06/2026
brain got in CHECK happy pride y’all!
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evan @wakeupevan.bsky.social · 27/06/2026
it’s bone dry bitter and hollow, you’ll be miles away tomorrow, why’d i try at alllllll
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evan @wakeupevan.bsky.social · 21/06/2026
i am so hungover.
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evan @wakeupevan.bsky.social · 21/06/2026
back home and drunk w a temporary tattoo im abt to play soooo much tears of the kingdom then go tf to sleep
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evan @wakeupevan.bsky.social · 21/06/2026
i went for the red y’all
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evan @wakeupevan.bsky.social · 20/06/2026
i….. hadn’t considered that
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evan @wakeupevan.bsky.social · 19/06/2026
CAAAARVE OUR NAAAAMES INTOOOO THE CAAARSEAT LEATHER
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evan @wakeupevan.bsky.social · 19/06/2026
saturday is bestie’s prom-themed bday party which shirt should i go for
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evan @wakeupevan.bsky.social · 18/06/2026
zephyr in the sky at night i wonder…. do my tears of mourning…. sink beneath the sun..?
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evan @wakeupevan.bsky.social · 17/06/2026
i’ve done nothing literally nothing today 😗
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evan @wakeupevan.bsky.social · 17/06/2026
i’m sorry y’all this is still insaaaane #dd2
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evan @wakeupevan.bsky.social · 15/06/2026
did SO much work yesterday so my coworkie (love her) would come in to a nice surprise and she’s still in a shit mood
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evan @wakeupevan.bsky.social · 12/06/2026
dragon’s dogma 2 is my new cozy game here’s my new arisen his name is valore and he is a silly wizard
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evan @wakeupevan.bsky.social · 10/06/2026
i’m off to the pool it is fucking SO humid i may die
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evan @wakeupevan.bsky.social · 10/06/2026
finally saying goodbye to my tried and trues after a few years 😭 i got them from plato’s closet for 20 bucks and they’ve had about four different pairs of laces put in, have been glued together multiple times, had three different insoles in them, but now they are begging me for a merciful death 🫡
a pair of white adidas sneakers on the floor in VERY rough condition. the toes of the shoe are completely frayed, they are dirty, the heel is worn down, and the laces are barely hanging on.
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evan @wakeupevan.bsky.social · 10/06/2026
i’m tipsy boots 🤭
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evan @wakeupevan.bsky.social · 09/06/2026
went out shopping then came home to free the nipple
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evan @wakeupevan.bsky.social · 02/06/2026
going to see obsession then going BACK out later to see backrooms stay tuned
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