iiinova — where your digital self keeps evolving

Spooky and Kooky @tydyebee.bsky.social · 07/02/2026

I love everything potatoes so color me interested 👀

Spooky and Kooky @tydyebee.bsky.social · 02/01/2025

I feel like a broken record of hope, then despair, hope, then despair, so I'm gonna spare the details of my birthday, Christmas, and New years experience. Ultimately, nothing has changed. I'm still really depressed and anxious. I'm still poor and tired with no health insurance. But it's 2025 now

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Spooky and Kooky @tydyebee.bsky.social · 16/12/2024

- to pretend on my birthday. I really don't. It seems sad, and I guess it is, but I just don't want to deal with anyone that day. I want to be left alone. Forgotten and an afterthought like i usually am. I can't wait for it to be over

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Spooky and Kooky @tydyebee.bsky.social · 16/12/2024

- I want to do to celebrate because it's such a milestone, but honestly, I don't want to celebrate it. I don't want to deal with people talking to me about it. I would rather just let it pass like a regular day. I don't want people talking to me about it. I want to be left alone. I just don't want -

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Spooky and Kooky @tydyebee.bsky.social · 16/12/2024

I'm turning 30 on Friday, and it has been something I've been stressing about since I turned 29 last year. It's not necessarily about the number but just how unhappy I am in my life and how unhappy I have been this year. Trying to find a reason to hope and keep going. People keep asking me what-

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Spooky and Kooky @tydyebee.bsky.social · 09/12/2024

I guess as a more positive note, I really want to see nosferatu on Christmas day! It looks very cool! Also, once I get my big paycheck and the extra income from my job, I want to spend money on things I want again... maybe that will make me feel human, idk. I'm just trying to find joy in the pain

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Spooky and Kooky @tydyebee.bsky.social · 09/12/2024

-mentally.. I am not doing physically well as I am wasting away from lack of funds and anxiety. I just feel hopeless and so so tired... I want to rest but never wake up. This year has really crushed my spirit. I truly feel defeated and questioning what the point of anything is

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Spooky and Kooky @tydyebee.bsky.social · 09/12/2024

-but I literally have no one else to vent to. I feel utterly alone and that I don't matter. Thar I wasn't meant for this world and I was a mistake. That all my problems would be gone if I just didn't exist anymore. I am really feeling it. It's scary but feels inevitable. I am really struggling

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Spooky and Kooky @tydyebee.bsky.social · 09/12/2024

I hate that when I post my feelings they're usually sad but I feel like I'm at a breaking point. I'm supposed to be doing better. I should be excited for my birthday coming up next week but all I feel is a sense of defeat. Questioning if I can go on any longer. I feel sick being this vulnerable

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Spooky and Kooky @tydyebee.bsky.social · 04/12/2024

My 10 Favorite Animated Features The Prince of Egypt The Incredibles Spirited Away Howl's Moving Castle Coraline Hunchback of Notre Dame Spiderman Into the Spiderverse Shrek 2 Beauty & the Beast The Princess and the Frog

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Spooky and Kooky @tydyebee.bsky.social · 04/12/2024

BUT! I am really making strides to reach out to people and go outside more. I hope to have money in the next couple of weeks that will help me push through so I can spend money on what i want for once! I am trying to be optimistic and look forward to things in the future.. please clap🧍🏾‍♀️

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Spooky and Kooky @tydyebee.bsky.social · 04/12/2024

I'm so tired. I hate waking up early. I hate working. I don't want to do anything 😪

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Spooky and Kooky @tydyebee.bsky.social · 04/12/2024

I'm turning 30 this month! Have been stressing about turning 30 since I turned 29 last year.. Hoping 30 is filled with joy and peace for you! I keep hearing that 30s is the best decade, so I'm cautiously optimistic!

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Spooky and Kooky @tydyebee.bsky.social · 17/11/2024

-a moment to talk into the void. To feel a semblance of being seen and heard until the cringe and shame set in. But that is the cycle of posting on the internet. Of being vulnerable. But as always, I keep pushing through because the alternative is bleak

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Spooky and Kooky @tydyebee.bsky.social · 17/11/2024

I feel like outbursts like this will be commonplace, so be prepared for that.. I'm going to continue to struggle and be unhappy before I am content with my life again. It's a process, I'm not perfect, and I am emotionally volatile. I really wish I could afford therapy, but all I have is this

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Spooky and Kooky @tydyebee.bsky.social · 17/11/2024

Sometimes you just have to say the bad feelings out loud. If for no other reason then to just keep it from festering in your mind. It is okay to feel negative emotions but you shouldn't sit with them. House them and keep them alive. There is a time and place

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Spooky and Kooky @tydyebee.bsky.social · 15/11/2024

I don't want to try anymore. It's too hard. There is no joy in it. I want it to end. I just can't keep going. I'm tired. I'm upset, I'm angry. I have nothing to look forward to. All hope is dashed. I'm just over it... I hate my life. This year has taken a toll on me and it's won. I give up

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Spooky and Kooky @tydyebee.bsky.social · 15/11/2024

So I basically found out that for my 1st pay check as a substitute I'm not being paid for all the work I did in between a month period. I'm being paid just for last month but last month I only got paid for 4 days.. I'm really upset. I can't keep living like this. I feel so exhausted

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Spooky and Kooky @tydyebee.bsky.social · 15/11/2024

Hey, question! Can we bookmark stuff on here and if not will we ever be able to @bsky.app ? It's one of my favorite features on social media, especially when likes get out of control! Also, sorry if this has already been answered

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Spooky and Kooky @tydyebee.bsky.social · 14/11/2024

-only and just whatever kind of level of art I want! Sketches to things that fit in a portfolio. I want to write headcanons, fanfiction, reviews, analysis, hot takes and just interact with people without feeling like i am running my portfolio. I want to have fun and connect on the internet again

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Spooky and Kooky @tydyebee.bsky.social · 14/11/2024

-case things are "separate but equal" 😬 I can't think of a better way of saying it. I feel like I'm taking the pressure of this space having to be my "serious" art portfolio. It's twitter adjacent so I want to be able to shit post but I miss posting my art so this will be my fandom space. Fanart-

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Spooky and Kooky @tydyebee.bsky.social · 14/11/2024

Which isn't social media but making art and continuing to put myself out there! I really am trying to create pockets of the internet where I can curate and cultivate a place for specific practices and act accordingly. I think I have struggled in the past having everything in one place. But in this-

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Spooky and Kooky @tydyebee.bsky.social · 14/11/2024

I am planning to post more on social media and be more strategic with my goals... I know I say that all the time and nothing new happens but I mean it! I feel like this year has been so catastrophic, and my life continues to be in shambles that I have no choice but to focus on the thing I love

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Spooky and Kooky @tydyebee.bsky.social · 10/11/2024

Doing a quick Google search since I have never had polenta, it's seems polenta is made from flint corn and has a subtle floral taste and flakier texture while grits is made from dent corn and has a stronger corn flavor. So take that as you will, but it seems they are comparable to each other

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Spooky and Kooky @tydyebee.bsky.social · 10/11/2024

I took a bookmaking class my 1st semester of grad school. I hated it at the time but now I'm really interested in making books! Mostly zines but also books. It's been fun prepping paper and thinking up ideas! Also, getting back into writing as a practice has been really cathartic and fulfilling!

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Spooky and Kooky @tydyebee.bsky.social · 10/11/2024

Yeah, i thought it was optional. You could choose one or the other, but apparently not! My grandma usually made me grits and never told me not to use sugar and butter, so I never questioned it!

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Spooky and Kooky @tydyebee.bsky.social · 10/11/2024

Thank you! I always put butter and sugar in mine... I knew people ate a more savory version, but I didn't know it was "blasphemous" or worthy of revoking your black card until social media... I also ate cream of wheat so I think I thought as a kid they were similar so I ate them the same way 🤷🏾‍♀️

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Spooky and Kooky @tydyebee.bsky.social · 06/11/2024

The world still turns while i stand still so I need to move myself forward. Make moves. Find joy in life. Give myself grace. I've been through so much and it's hard being alive right now but I want to try. If not for myself then out of spite. Out of hope. Through determination. I want to try

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Spooky and Kooky @tydyebee.bsky.social · 06/11/2024

That I need to focus on my present and focus on the things I can control and ignore the rest. I feel like people tell you this and you see posts about it but with everything dealing with mental health you have to ready to recieve it. And I think I'm ready now. Or I have to be open to it

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Spooky and Kooky @tydyebee.bsky.social · 06/11/2024

I feel this year I have been sleepwalking through life. Hoping one day I will suddenly have the will to live the life I want. I'm coming to realize that maybe that day will never come. That my life isn't meant looking at the past i have regrets for or towards a future I cannot predict.

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Spooky and Kooky @tydyebee.bsky.social · 06/11/2024

-need to have plans to help people on the issues affecting them, have candidates that represent the diversity of their party and make people feel like they have a voice with their constituents. The democrats have been fucking up for too long and I'm tired of it, like get it fucking together!

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Spooky and Kooky @tydyebee.bsky.social · 06/11/2024

-make actual change in everyday people's lives. They forgot they work for us and if they don't they want be elected. They shouldn't be surprised at this point. I am sick of tired of voting for the lesser of 2 evils but I have for 8 years now. But to win to get back on the board democrats really-

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Spooky and Kooky @tydyebee.bsky.social · 06/11/2024

I have been frustrated with the democratic party and who they decide to lead them since 2016. Time and time again they choose people they want instead of people Americans/ the working clas/ progressives want. They thought people will vote for them no matter what and continue not to do enough to-

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Spooky and Kooky @tydyebee.bsky.social · 06/11/2024

I would just like to say and I was going to say this regardless of if kamala won, the democratic party needs to get their fucking act together. They were lucky in 2020 and have learned nothing from 2016. It's time to really work on listening to the people and not big donors. Take this as a lesson

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Spooky and Kooky @tydyebee.bsky.social · 30/10/2024

- but I can't so I am filled with regret and shame and the process goes on and on so I just push through... I have to push through and continue somehow. Hope I can connect with the people I want to or find people who enjoy my melancholy ass so I don't feel bad speaking my truth... idk life's hard

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Spooky and Kooky @tydyebee.bsky.social · 30/10/2024

-which is also bad! How late is too late to connect with someone? Idk but if I miss someone I want to tell them. If I'm thinking about someone I will tell them! But I don't expect anything cause I know the person I am is just not conducive to a happy life. I'm toxic in that way. I want to connect-

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Spooky and Kooky @tydyebee.bsky.social · 30/10/2024

I also know I am such a downer that I can't talk to anyone about this. All I do is complain, I'm never positive and I know people don't want to talk to me cause they know it's gonna be negative and I wish I could stop feeling this way but I can't so I just don't say anything to people-

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Spooky and Kooky @tydyebee.bsky.social · 30/10/2024

Idk I'm questioning if there is a job I'm comfortable in or should I make a job I would be... do you ever just feel like you're bad at being a person.. like you were just made fundamentally wrong, and you just suck at everything... I am feeling that so much this week.. I just feel incompetent

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Spooky and Kooky @tydyebee.bsky.social · 30/10/2024

I started substitute teaching this week and idk if I like it or not... 1st day was terrible the kindergarten kids were fighting and cussing. It was wild! The next day was better idk I just feel awkward as usual but also unqualified like I'm not the teacher but I am and I feel tired all the time

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Spooky and Kooky @tydyebee.bsky.social · 25/10/2024

Maybe I’m being selfish but I don’t like the expectation that I make people art for free all the time… it makes me not want to do it ever… especially for free.. I would rather make my own art then be at the beck and call of others needs for FREE idk I’m poor right now so money is on the mind!

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Spooky and Kooky @tydyebee.bsky.social · 25/10/2024

One of the more frustrating things about being the artist or creative in your family is people asking you to do random art stuff for no reason… like for a class project or a random project and it’s just annoying and feels convoluted or inconvenience for their pleasure

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Spooky and Kooky @tydyebee.bsky.social · 22/10/2024

Sometimes, I forget that people like me and actually want me around 🥲 It's a nice reminder

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Spooky and Kooky @tydyebee.bsky.social · 21/10/2024

I have a really hard time starting things... I can end them at times, but sometimes that's hard too. I say I'm good at the middle, being productive on a project not fully realized with results varying from success to failure. But I'm terrible at starting.. I get too in my head wanting to start-

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Spooky and Kooky @tydyebee.bsky.social · 21/10/2024

Sometimes I feel like it's easier for me to lie, to leave out, to minimize accomplishments than to actually say what I'm feeling or what I'm doing. I've grown accustomed to keeping things close to my chest. To holding my breath

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Spooky and Kooky @tydyebee.bsky.social · 16/10/2024

One of my favorite hobbies is going on a shopping site and liking a bunch of clothes but never buying them! I can image having a closet full of cool, fun clothes but none of the crippling debt! I mean I already have crippling debt but not from a shopping addiction 👍🏾

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Spooky and Kooky @tydyebee.bsky.social · 16/10/2024

So in the meantime why don't I just talk to myself and shit post while I wait? I feel like this can be my chance to start anew to be as cringe and sentimental as possible. To manifest, to rant, to rave. All for the hope that it will turn into something good... what do I have to lose?

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Spooky and Kooky @tydyebee.bsky.social · 16/10/2024

- I want to be okay with being not okay but it's so hard.. I compare myself to others and I don't want to be seen or perceived.. I want to disappear into the ether. I want to be forgotten and gone from people's memories.. I want to end my suffering.. but I can't yet

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Spooky and Kooky @tydyebee.bsky.social · 16/10/2024

- I want to live I think? I want to live a life. I have hopes, dreams aspirations but the drive seems to falter... I hate myself and my life and I feel like I can't change it... I want to open up and express it openly but when I do I feel shame and cringe afterwards.. -

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Spooky and Kooky @tydyebee.bsky.social · 16/10/2024

My life is so fucked up right now and I feel like I will never get it together... it's gotten so bad I started writing about my negative feelings just to keep it at bay. I have no money, no career, no prospects but I'm still supposed to get going? What is the point? I don't see one-

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