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Dups Cracken

@turtleshelf.bsky.social

424 followers 2.6K following 498 posts

Cog sci/philosophy grad, doing a MEnv, commie sicko, iron brained woke, militant optimist doomer, layabout (non-derogatory), sluggard (derogatory)

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Dups Cracken @turtleshelf.bsky.social · 30/09/2026

screenshot of the america government chatbot website showing that chat is currently unavailable

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Dups Cracken @turtleshelf.bsky.social · 29/09/2026

cartoon of man talking to computer. he says "say 'i am drunk'" computer responds "I AM DRUNK" he says "oh my god". The word "drunk" has been hand drawn on top of the original cartoon, replacing a different word.

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Dups Cracken @turtleshelf.bsky.social · 26/09/2026

Ok the earth dips at 7.85cm/1km of distance². You (and times square, and the air around you) have continued at 1,269km/h for ~105km (65.24mi), so your altitude is ~865.5m (2,839.4ft). If you look directly down (towards centre of the earth) you should see a spot ~10m west of where you started.

google earth pro image of times square, with a pin in the centre of the intersection and a red line extending 10m to the west

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Dups Cracken @turtleshelf.bsky.social · 23/09/2026

not saying it's worse than throwing fireworks at them but the line about shooting them with beanbag rounds really sticks in my head

screenshotted excerpt from the linked Guardian article, reading "Tassal also used 31 bean bag rounds – fabric-coated plastic shells containing lead shot – against seals at its leases on the Tasman Peninsula. Tassal is the only salmon company that uses these devices in Tasmania."

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Dups Cracken @turtleshelf.bsky.social · 13/07/2026

Very 90s vibes poster for the movie "Death In Brunswick" starring Sam Neill, Zoe Carides and John Clarke

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Dups Cracken @turtleshelf.bsky.social · 25/06/2026

screenshot of 2019 tweet from @normal_now that used to read "Sometimes on campus you accidentally walk by a Business class and the professor is writing like 'Profit = revenue - costs' on the board and everyone is taking notes like its actual school" but the "profit = revenue - costs" bit has been replaced by some of the deranged goose-related slides from the softbank presentation

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Dups Cracken @turtleshelf.bsky.social · 21/06/2026

Old painting of Moses yeah the guy from the bible, he's parted the red sea and there's lightning crashing behind him. He's got a great flowing white beard and hair, wielding a staff in one hand, the other open and outstretched to the waves. He's got a white Jedi robe and a sick red cloak vibe over the top. Many folk are walking through the parted sea behind him, they got some wagons which I always think of as more of a middle-ages thing but I guess we've had them for ages and the ancient Egyptians were pretty switched on so they could definitely have figured the tech out. Moses is very white, he looks like he works in academia at Oxford or something.

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Dups Cracken @turtleshelf.bsky.social · 08/06/2026

Meme of George Bush being told 'a second plane has hit the tower' masterfully edited to say 'a second strait has hit the closed'

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Dups Cracken @turtleshelf.bsky.social · 30/05/2026

people use these things for science

google was asked "how many days of the week have a fish in them" and the ai overview responded "There are three days of the week that literally contain the word "fish": Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday. All other days (Monday, Friday, Saturday, and Sunday) do not include "fish" in their spelling.

in response to the previous screenshot, the ai overview was asked "what about friday", to which it repsonded "Friday does not have a "fish" in it. The previous answer was actually part of a classic wordplay riddle. The trick relies on the phonetic sound of the words, not their actual spelling: Tue-sday ("two"s day) -> 2 fish. Wedne-sday ("When's" day) -> 0 fish. Thur-sday ("Third's" day) -> 3 fish. Because friday does not fit this numeric phonetic pattern, it has zero fish."
The ai then offers to explore more word riddles and brain teasers.

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Dups Cracken @turtleshelf.bsky.social · 21/05/2026

Pip Skid fans in tatters

Screenshot of google search results for the phrase "why are you so stupid", which is the title of a 2011 song by Canadian artist Pip Skid. The nightmare google AI overview has taken this personally and answered the search with "I'm sorry if I didn't give you the answer you were looking for! I'm an AI, which means I don't have feelings, but I sometimes make mistakes, misunderstand prompts, or lack the exact information needed to be helpful. If you can tell me a bit more about what went wrong..." And then the text fades out beneath the "show more" button.
Immediately beneath this google has in fact returned a link to the pip skid song so what are we even doing here?

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Dups Cracken @turtleshelf.bsky.social · 19/04/2026

Screenshot of a Reddit post returned by a google search of a humorous business hours sign that reads: "business hours: open most days about 9 or 10. Occasionally as early as 7, and sometimes as late as 12 or 1. We close about 5:30 or 6 occasionally about 4 or 5 and sometimes as late as midnight, or later. On somedays were not here at all but lately we've been here a lot, unless we're not here". In a mark of comic genius that is also a clever and pithy comment on current events I have added the words "straight of hormuz" above the sign Ah fuck ah shit I used the wrong "strait" Ah jeez hopefully no one notices I think it still works I think it still tracks

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Dups Cracken @turtleshelf.bsky.social · 09/03/2026

Screenshot of a Jan 25 2019 Twitter post from merman_melville that reads "Being a billionaire must be insane. You can buy new teeth, new skin. All your chairs cost 20,000 dollars and weigh 2,000 pounds. Your life is just a series of your own preferences. In terms of cognitive impairment it's probably like being kicked in the head by a horse every day"

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Dups Cracken @turtleshelf.bsky.social · 29/01/2026

Here is my good friend Tinto I hope this helps

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Dups Cracken @turtleshelf.bsky.social · 09/11/2025

Mamdani campaign poster generator using text from opening of Master and Commander

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Dups Cracken @turtleshelf.bsky.social · 23/07/2025

What perfect albums came out when you were 16? Idk if they were perfect but they slapped

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Dups Cracken @turtleshelf.bsky.social · 21/07/2025

Classic "me sowing, me reaping" tweet but it now says "me being doused with petrol after being a huge cunt: haha go on, do it. Me on fire: Well this fucking sucks. What the fuck"

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Dups Cracken @turtleshelf.bsky.social · 02/06/2025

Greg Jericho

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Dups Cracken @turtleshelf.bsky.social · 30/04/2025

wait no this is better

same as before but a way better cover, all funk vibes

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Dups Cracken @turtleshelf.bsky.social · 30/04/2025

cover of vladimir lenin's "what is to be done?" but the title is clumsily changed to "so. what now"

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Dups Cracken @turtleshelf.bsky.social · 21/04/2025

Classic Wint meme about being unable to shoot Dracula due to woke but through cunning and sophisticated editing techniques it has been changed to be about how Will Stoncil is a coward etc

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Dups Cracken @turtleshelf.bsky.social · 14/04/2025

Best looking loaf of gluten free bread you ever seen, shiny dark golden brown crust, light brown where the cuts have opened up, looks like a dang emoji, studio Ghibli ass loaf

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Dups Cracken @turtleshelf.bsky.social · 08/04/2025

Slimy shit from the Libs

Envelope that appears to be official election information but the contents are just from the liberal party

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Dups Cracken @turtleshelf.bsky.social · 13/02/2025

Garfield looks at a sign with a picture of him under the "no smoking" style crossed circle symbol and asks "huh. I wonder who that's for"

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Dups Cracken @turtleshelf.bsky.social · 13/02/2025

Wineglass bay on the Freycinet Peninsula in Tasmania. Blue-green water meets a sweeping crescent of white sand studded with kelp from high tide, which curves to the left away from the camera, and then back to the right to meet two dark peaks, their tops lost in low clouds.

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Dups Cracken @turtleshelf.bsky.social · 28/01/2025

Classic dril tweet, with clumsy edits so that it now reads "and another thing: AGI
please put in the newspaper that AGI"

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Dups Cracken @turtleshelf.bsky.social · 19/12/2024

It shouldn't! If in doubt there are a variety of chicken salts available at all Australian supermarkets, and you can check the label. I shall attach a photo of my preferred, vegetarian option.

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