Reposted by tioLechugaThe Onion @theonion.com · 05/11/2025Conservative Man Proudly Frightened Of Everythingtheonion.comConservative Man Proudly Frightened Of EverythingFLOWER MOUND, TX—Condemning the “woke left” for what he called the “modern evisceration of masculinity,” local conservative man Hank Daniels confirmed Monday that he was never going to stop being prou... 304621726
tioLechuga @tiolechuga.bsky.social · 05/10/2025caveman: omg Lucy, did you see that glowing rock? Lucy: totally weird. you should totally shoot them. caveman: fr fr 010
tioLechuga @tiolechuga.bsky.social · 04/10/2025anyone else expect those Segway things to become something much bigger than mall cop transport??!? 010
tioLechuga @tiolechuga.bsky.social · 03/10/2025do unto others as tho you understand what unto even means. 010
tioLechuga @tiolechuga.bsky.social · 03/10/2025for someone who’s life has been all about words, I have none to give. 010
tioLechuga @tiolechuga.bsky.social · 01/10/2025media.tenor.combart simpson is holding a bowling ball while sitting next to milhouseALT: bart simpson is holding a bowling ball while sitting next to milhouse 010
tioLechuga @tiolechuga.bsky.social · 26/09/2025have you tried turning it off, and then never turning it on again ever? 000
tioLechuga @tiolechuga.bsky.social · 20/09/2025I have never, never even once, put a USB port in upside down. DMs open. 010
tioLechuga @tiolechuga.bsky.social · 20/09/2025you good, babe? you haven’t touched your midnight fruity pebbles. 000
tioLechuga @tiolechuga.bsky.social · 16/09/2025oof. that hurts and you don’t have coffee to comfort you. sorry for your loss. 100
tioLechuga @tiolechuga.bsky.social · 12/09/2025is it even real lettuce if it doesn’t have a little dirt in it? 000
tioLechuga @tiolechuga.bsky.social · 09/09/2025do you work at a bank? ‘cause i’d like you to leave me a loan. 000
tioLechuga @tiolechuga.bsky.social · 07/09/2025i’d be more interested if you were more interesting 010
