Reposted by tioLechugaThe Onion @theonion.com · 05/11/2025Conservative Man Proudly Frightened Of Everythingtheonion.comConservative Man Proudly Frightened Of EverythingFLOWER MOUND, TX—Condemning the “woke left” for what he called the “modern evisceration of masculinity,” local conservative man Hank Daniels confirmed Monday that he was never going to stop being prou... 304621726
tioLechuga @tiolechuga.bsky.social · 04/10/2025anyone else expect those Segway things to become something much bigger than mall cop transport??!? 010
tioLechuga @tiolechuga.bsky.social · 03/10/2025do unto others as tho you understand what unto even means. 010
tioLechuga @tiolechuga.bsky.social · 03/10/2025for someone who’s life has been all about words, I have none to give. 010
tioLechuga @tiolechuga.bsky.social · 26/09/2025have you tried turning it off, and then never turning it on again ever? 000
tioLechuga @tiolechuga.bsky.social · 20/09/2025I have never, never even once, put a USB port in upside down. DMs open. 010
tioLechuga @tiolechuga.bsky.social · 20/09/2025you good, babe? you haven’t touched your midnight fruity pebbles. 000
tioLechuga @tiolechuga.bsky.social · 12/09/2025is it even real lettuce if it doesn’t have a little dirt in it? 000
tioLechuga @tiolechuga.bsky.social · 09/09/2025do you work at a bank? ‘cause i’d like you to leave me a loan. 000
tioLechuga @tiolechuga.bsky.social · 07/09/2025i’d be more interested if you were more interesting 010
tioLechuga @tiolechuga.bsky.social · 05/09/2025there’s nothing gayer than a group of straight men 000
tioLechuga @tiolechuga.bsky.social · 03/09/2025you are not entitled to other people’s silence when in public. 000
tioLechuga @tiolechuga.bsky.social · 28/08/2025hey Apple Maps… it’s me. i’m the hazard. and i am still here. 000
tioLechuga @tiolechuga.bsky.social · 27/08/2025today i learned about Dirty Dilliards #DirtyDilliards #Dilliards 000
tioLechuga @tiolechuga.bsky.social · 21/08/2025to all of my devoted fans and followers, good morning. 010
tioLechuga @tiolechuga.bsky.social · 19/08/2025on a long enough timeline the survival rate for everyone drops to zero. 000
tioLechuga @tiolechuga.bsky.social · 16/08/2025hey you want to see something? <plays favorite song> 000
tioLechuga @tiolechuga.bsky.social · 13/08/2025don’t forget to loot the bodies before the next checkpoint 000
tioLechuga @tiolechuga.bsky.social · 12/08/2025i thought teaching was the purview for those who can’t. 000
