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Astral Bollshit

@tinyarms-tinyart.bsky.social
2.8K followers 1.1K following 14K posts

Tiny Arms, Tiny Art, Massive Bedhead Just a T-Rex trying to survive American Fascism Locked in an epic eternal battle with the Universe Disabled "Picasso In Progress" twitch.tv/mysticbedhead

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Astral Bollshit @tinyarms-tinyart.bsky.social · 6h
Aight, I'm going to bed Antifa meeting on astral plane 12 (in the Triangle Circle wing). We're moving onto the second part of our Walking Frame maintenance unit. We're troubleshooting hinge-locking to avoid fatal stair accidents. But first we must learn to lock up the hinge, before we can unlock it
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Astral Bollshit @tinyarms-tinyart.bsky.social · 6h
Does Torgo have to be breathing the whole year, or would it count if he's simply taking up space and making it stinky and weird (like he would be breathing)?
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Astral Bollshit @tinyarms-tinyart.bsky.social · 6h
Tomorrow I predict at least one "render unto Caesar" talk and a couple "being gay/trans is bad" talks, and the rest will be more suffering-porn with Prepper advice thrown in. Maybe ONE anti-abortion talk, but they gotta know they're in hot water there, so probably not.
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Astral Bollshit @tinyarms-tinyart.bsky.social · 6h
Apparently today's LDS conference theme was "suffering is holy, give us your money" Given they have enough money to alleviate most of the world's suffering, without one more dime from members, it's an odd but completely predictable message.
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Astral Bollshit @tinyarms-tinyart.bsky.social · 7h
Oh that's very good news! Except about the ban, of course.
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Astral Bollshit @tinyarms-tinyart.bsky.social · 7h
Well, that explains my legs then. Can tomorrow be churro day?
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Astral Bollshit @tinyarms-tinyart.bsky.social · 7h
As someone who hates both, I've never agreed with you on something more than I do right now. They go alongside each other in my trash can 🙂‍↕️
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Astral Bollshit @tinyarms-tinyart.bsky.social · 7h
Easy, kids are easy to scare by threatening to take away their parents for misbehaving. Adults are scared of losing their children and never seeing them again. The church is using very cheap scare tactics on everyone. Like always.
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Astral Bollshit @tinyarms-tinyart.bsky.social · 7h
Oh yeah. Forgot about that. We'll miss you, but it's for the best. But to be fair, I really shouldn't have done a hairpin archery night without the proper liability insurance
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Astral Bollshit @tinyarms-tinyart.bsky.social · 7h
static.klipy.com
Demetria McKinney Says 'I Appreciate You'
ALT: Demetria McKinney Says 'I Appreciate You'
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Astral Bollshit @tinyarms-tinyart.bsky.social · 8h
I couldn't get the 7. We have to use the 12 today. Which sucks because that's the one without a sink.
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Astral Bollshit @tinyarms-tinyart.bsky.social · 8h
Ah. One of those "who is this movie even for?" movies.
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Astral Bollshit @tinyarms-tinyart.bsky.social · 8h
This Sunday is different since I'll have my son, but I will probably still be too *gestures broadly at self* tomorrow anyways. But next Sunday, I'm gonna go make some friends. Or...try, at least. I'm not very good at that part 😅
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Astral Bollshit @tinyarms-tinyart.bsky.social · 8h
I just found out there's a gay bar that does drag show brunches on Sundays and I think I found my new church I need to get out, I'm definitely looking for my lgbtqia+ community out here, and Sundays are usually my day off from Mom Duty I'm putting it on my calendar. I'm gonna socialize.
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Astral Bollshit @tinyarms-tinyart.bsky.social · 8h
Me neither and I hope this is the only thing I ever see about it
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Astral Bollshit @tinyarms-tinyart.bsky.social · 8h
Imma have my emotional support carbs and bath soon, and hopefully I'll be less cantankerous, but I'm just gonna say this week really finished putting a nail in the coffin of "maybe he stole the election" conspiracy theory. I now fully believe there's enough horrid people to have voted him in.
static.klipy.com
Will Ferrell as Ron Burgundy: Not Depressing
ALT: Will Ferrell as Ron Burgundy: Not Depressing
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Astral Bollshit @tinyarms-tinyart.bsky.social · 9h
Does slapping the hot grill with both sides of the steak count as cooking?
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Astral Bollshit @tinyarms-tinyart.bsky.social · 9h
Oooooooohhhhhhhhhhh THIS is why they've been sane-washing Tom for the last month and sending out the thirsty middle aged lady bots to troll anyone who calls out his problematic everything. It can stop now, right?
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Astral Bollshit @tinyarms-tinyart.bsky.social · 9h
Lol, I'm giving myself a little pass, given I haven't said it in 20 years and was playing with it like a madlib where only men/man is allowed 😅😂 Still, it's annoying tf out of me
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Astral Bollshit @tinyarms-tinyart.bsky.social · 10h
I beg thee Bluesky I am too ADHD I am too stupid I am bred from those for whom we blame typos Please, I beg For an edit button I would sell my neighbor's sister's best friend's cousin's soul.
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Astral Bollshit @tinyarms-tinyart.bsky.social · 10h
I fucked up my own satire pledge 🤦🏼‍♀️
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Astral Bollshit @tinyarms-tinyart.bsky.social · 10h
Pretty much the thought that triggered it, but I didn't want to give anyone any ideas to pitch his way 😅😂
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Astral Bollshit @tinyarms-tinyart.bsky.social · 10h
"I pledge allegiance to the Men of the United States of America. And to the republicans for which they Stan, one nation under man, with justice and liberty for men." I hate realizing I was saying the wrong words all these years. Damn audio processing disorder...
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Astral Bollshit @tinyarms-tinyart.bsky.social · 11h
🖤🫂
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Astral Bollshit @tinyarms-tinyart.bsky.social · 11h
🖤🫂
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Astral Bollshit @tinyarms-tinyart.bsky.social · 11h
Gotta be. There's really no other explanation 🤔
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Astral Bollshit @tinyarms-tinyart.bsky.social · 11h
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Astral Bollshit @tinyarms-tinyart.bsky.social · 11h
I avoid that by simply never opening my DMs unless a friend mentions they sent one. But the weirdest thing is that it's my dino mask selfies that most tend to bring the creeps out of the woodwork and into my DMs. Still trying to figure that one out
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Astral Bollshit @tinyarms-tinyart.bsky.social · 12h
Literally 🤣😭
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Astral Bollshit @tinyarms-tinyart.bsky.social · 12h
🫂🖤🫂
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Astral Bollshit @tinyarms-tinyart.bsky.social · 12h
🫂🖤🫶🏼
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Astral Bollshit @tinyarms-tinyart.bsky.social · 12h
Fair point 🤣🤣🤣
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Astral Bollshit @tinyarms-tinyart.bsky.social · 12h
I'm guessing she did it because he promised to concede something in the divorce that she wants.
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Astral Bollshit @tinyarms-tinyart.bsky.social · 13h
Who got broken in that movie, huh? HUH?! You don't stand a chance against me and my strategic fructose consumption 🤭
static.klipy.com
Rocky IV: Dolph Lundgren's Knockout Punch
ALT: Rocky IV: Dolph Lundgren's Knockout Punch
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Astral Bollshit @tinyarms-tinyart.bsky.social · 13h
Thank you potatoes, for keeping Bluesky somewhere that feels safe for my brain right now. It's really trying to eat itself while screamcryingthrowingup and it really helps to be able to escape to a friend group for a few minutes here and there. I picked a hell of a time to cold-turkey my weed.
static.klipy.com
Flying High
ALT: Flying High
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Astral Bollshit @tinyarms-tinyart.bsky.social · 13h
Hopefully we're never in the same league and must have a showdown. I will show no mercy
static.klipy.com
Bubbles (Powerpuff Girls): Mercy is for the Weak!
ALT: Bubbles (Powerpuff Girls): Mercy is for the Weak!
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Astral Bollshit @tinyarms-tinyart.bsky.social · 13h
You're supposed to be my Mick, experienced, wise, and a wisecrack.
static.klipy.com
Mickey Goldmill's Iconic Pep Talk from Rocky
ALT: Mickey Goldmill's Iconic Pep Talk from Rocky
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Astral Bollshit @tinyarms-tinyart.bsky.social · 13h
Surely there will be consistency rules. With my ibs I could reign as champion, yet it also feels unfair to those with slower, more functional systems 🤔
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Astral Bollshit @tinyarms-tinyart.bsky.social · 13h
static.klipy.com
Hilarious Spit Take Reaction
ALT: Hilarious Spit Take Reaction
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Astral Bollshit @tinyarms-tinyart.bsky.social · 13h
I'm absolutely convinced this is why so many men, including my ex, can hear the words right out of a womans mouth and immediately think, "but obviously she doesn't mean me."
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Astral Bollshit @tinyarms-tinyart.bsky.social · 13h
Too many men heard their moms say, "obviously I don't mean you" to their dads when negativity critiquing male behavior but as kids they thought that meant your partner never meant YOUR bad behavior, not that their moms were trying not to get hit/raped/punished for calling out their dads shit.
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Astral Bollshit @tinyarms-tinyart.bsky.social · 15h
I like your friend 😂
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Astral Bollshit @tinyarms-tinyart.bsky.social · 16h
Finally found a sport I may actually have the necessary skills to compete in
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Astral Bollshit @tinyarms-tinyart.bsky.social · 16h
I'm just glad I've been broken his whole life so he doesn't know to be distressed. Especially since I'm 100% sure he's witnessing his future, and I want him to know how to laugh through it.
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Astral Bollshit @tinyarms-tinyart.bsky.social · 16h
I'm pretty sure I can prove it in court
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Astral Bollshit @tinyarms-tinyart.bsky.social · 16h
Not me saying "system override initiated" as I feel a takedown coming on and my son saying, "computer, emergency reboot!" and I'm still going down, but laughing.
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Astral Bollshit @tinyarms-tinyart.bsky.social · 17h
BABY!!! 😍
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Astral Bollshit @tinyarms-tinyart.bsky.social · 17h
I mean, wasn't good for her friend either 😅
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Astral Bollshit @tinyarms-tinyart.bsky.social · 18h
This sounds more right than vinegar by a long shot. I was going to try an exorcism 🤷🏼‍♀️
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Astral Bollshit @tinyarms-tinyart.bsky.social · 18h
I miss Michigan weed 😭
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