Tilskatoff 🇺🇦🏳️🌈🏳️⚧️🇬🇱 @tilskatoff.bsky.social · 7h18yo and I were at a comedy show at the Palladium last night. It was good minus a couple of coked up wankers, performatively laughing in an over-the-top way. The comedian just posted a photo of the audience. Made me laugh that you can actually make out our blurry little faces glaring at them. 020
Tilskatoff 🇺🇦🏳️🌈🏳️⚧️🇬🇱 @tilskatoff.bsky.social · 08/10/2026Given his proclivity to pebble-dash his pants every 5mins, he should name it "Shartificial intelligence". 010
Tilskatoff 🇺🇦🏳️🌈🏳️⚧️🇬🇱 @tilskatoff.bsky.social · 06/10/2026Just had to Google "prophylactic antibiotic" because my only understanding of the word meant I was envisaging a patient rolling on a condom infused with penicillin. 010
Tilskatoff 🇺🇦🏳️🌈🏳️⚧️🇬🇱 @tilskatoff.bsky.social · 06/10/2026I absolutely love this. Disappointed that the English dance wasn't him learning the intricacies of the Doncaster pub routine. 010
Tilskatoff 🇺🇦🏳️🌈🏳️⚧️🇬🇱 @tilskatoff.bsky.social · 04/10/2026If Xi did say this (which he didn't), pretty sure he meant "have you just shit your pants?" 000
Tilskatoff 🇺🇦🏳️🌈🏳️⚧️🇬🇱 @tilskatoff.bsky.social · 02/10/2026I hadn't either really till the other day and I just suddenly thought "wow, that's so basic and shit". He's even just rhyming "fly" with "fly". As you said, maybe the lesson is as long as you do something with style and charisma, you can get away with any old bollocks. 110
Tilskatoff 🇺🇦🏳️🌈🏳️⚧️🇬🇱 @tilskatoff.bsky.social · 01/10/2026Whenever you have imposter syndrome, it's worth remembering that Lenny Kravitz went multi-platinum with 'Fly Away' despite lyrics that would barely scrape a prize in an infant school poetry competition. 120
Tilskatoff 🇺🇦🏳️🌈🏳️⚧️🇬🇱 @tilskatoff.bsky.social · 25/09/2026Brilliant, cos' that's what the world needs....more arseholes with nuclear weapons. Seriously, just wake me up when we're living in a matriarchy. I'm so done. 001
Tilskatoff 🇺🇦🏳️🌈🏳️⚧️🇬🇱 @tilskatoff.bsky.social · 23/09/2026That's very true, especially if it's in a brown envelope. Urgh, it's a horrible feeling. 000
Tilskatoff 🇺🇦🏳️🌈🏳️⚧️🇬🇱 @tilskatoff.bsky.social · 23/09/2026Is it a neurodivergent thing or just anxiety to constantly feel like you're in trouble? I get an email notification- my stomach lurches cos' I must be in trouble. I get a text - I feel a bit sick because I'm probably in trouble. A letter pops through the door - oh God, I must have done s/thing wrong 110
Tilskatoff 🇺🇦🏳️🌈🏳️⚧️🇬🇱 @tilskatoff.bsky.social · 23/09/2026The shame of deleting a post because you hadn't caught up on your timeline enough to see someone else had done it 3hrs ago. 020
Tilskatoff 🇺🇦🏳️🌈🏳️⚧️🇬🇱 @tilskatoff.bsky.social · 21/09/2026Had a conversation with my eldest this afternoon that unexpectedly involved the phrase "concentric circles of shart". 000
Tilskatoff 🇺🇦🏳️🌈🏳️⚧️🇬🇱 @tilskatoff.bsky.social · 18/09/2026I thought peri-menopause wasn't having too much of an effect on me brain fog-wise, but I tried to say 'Silence of the Lambs' a few days ago and all my brain would give me was 'Vision of the Swans'. 000
Tilskatoff 🇺🇦🏳️🌈🏳️⚧️🇬🇱 @tilskatoff.bsky.social · 11/09/2026My 9/11/01 - I was messing around in a chat-room at work rather than actually working. A NYorker in the chat saw the 1st plane hit out of her office window. I blurted it out to everyone+they asked how I knew - what news was it on? Erm...I forget, definitely not a chat-room though *cough cough* 001
Tilskatoff 🇺🇦🏳️🌈🏳️⚧️🇬🇱 @tilskatoff.bsky.social · 06/09/2026This would be so exciting. And, what a lovely, kind face the lead ecologist has. 000
Tilskatoff 🇺🇦🏳️🌈🏳️⚧️🇬🇱 @tilskatoff.bsky.social · 05/09/2026Thankyou, crikey! Glad she's OK. Remind me to check for giant otters before I swim anywhere ! 100
Tilskatoff 🇺🇦🏳️🌈🏳️⚧️🇬🇱 @tilskatoff.bsky.social · 05/09/2026No, but I saw someone talking about it who mentioned that they can be 6ft and I was amazed and had to check. Still need to find the reel they were talking about.....or do I? Is it horrific? 100
Tilskatoff 🇺🇦🏳️🌈🏳️⚧️🇬🇱 @tilskatoff.bsky.social · 05/09/2026This morning, I needed to look up the relative size of a giant river otter with a human (don't ask). Strongly suspect a man made this diagram. 120
Tilskatoff 🇺🇦🏳️🌈🏳️⚧️🇬🇱 @tilskatoff.bsky.social · 01/09/2026I'm not sure I like it when my Duolingo widget gives the general vibe of Commandant Lassard being sucked off at the lectern. I'll get to my Norwegian lesson when I have time and an owl's cum face won't make me do it any sooner. 051
Tilskatoff 🇺🇦🏳️🌈🏳️⚧️🇬🇱 @tilskatoff.bsky.social · 31/08/2026Very much like that! The thrill of getting it right to adopting the correct facial expression for the news was quite the gear change. You know me....love a quiz - it takes over my entire being. 010
Tilskatoff 🇺🇦🏳️🌈🏳️⚧️🇬🇱 @tilskatoff.bsky.social · 31/08/2026I discovered Di had died in a Pompeian bar. The owner came up to us+started doing charades peppered with basic Italian words. I get very excited at quizzes+probably should have processed the info better before I triumphantly shouted "Princess Diana is dead!!" like I'd just won 'Give Us a Clue'. 160
Tilskatoff 🇺🇦🏳️🌈🏳️⚧️🇬🇱 @tilskatoff.bsky.social · 31/08/2026This reminds me of driving through Henley and being reminded it was the 80's Rewind Festival purely because I saw He-Man using a cash machine. 000
Tilskatoff 🇺🇦🏳️🌈🏳️⚧️🇬🇱 @tilskatoff.bsky.social · 27/08/2026One day, the dozy fucker will finally hit the jackpot. 000
Tilskatoff 🇺🇦🏳️🌈🏳️⚧️🇬🇱 @tilskatoff.bsky.social · 26/08/2026For my 18yr old's birthday cake I got the cover art from their favourite album printed on it. After a few slices, we've inadvertently produced an equine Jimothy. #jimothy 000
Tilskatoff 🇺🇦🏳️🌈🏳️⚧️🇬🇱 @tilskatoff.bsky.social · 25/08/2026Was up very late last night decorating the front room for my 18yr old coming downstairs this morning for their birthday and was so pleased with myself. In the cold light of day, we both agree that my colour scheme choice is giving less "birthday" and much more....."wake". 010
Tilskatoff 🇺🇦🏳️🌈🏳️⚧️🇬🇱 @tilskatoff.bsky.social · 24/08/2026Next time, I might double check my weird neighbour *isn't* in his garden before I start un-pegging my knickers from the line so they fall directly into the basket while singing 🎶"It's raining pants, Hallelujah!!"🎶 in an overblown Texan accent.....to my cat. Cat, not impressed either FWIW. 020
Tilskatoff 🇺🇦🏳️🌈🏳️⚧️🇬🇱 @tilskatoff.bsky.social · 24/08/2026I'm trying to write my child's 18th birthday card and can't stop crying. Keep having to stop and just crumble for a minute. 020
Tilskatoff 🇺🇦🏳️🌈🏳️⚧️🇬🇱 @tilskatoff.bsky.social · 22/08/2026I'm ever so slightly in love with pandas but the problem is that they're so weird and adorable (and act like children in bear costumes) that it's impossible to tell what's AI and what's real now. #AIsucksassstatic.klipy.comMonday Office Panda PrankALT: Monday Office Panda Prank 000
Tilskatoff 🇺🇦🏳️🌈🏳️⚧️🇬🇱 @tilskatoff.bsky.social · 22/08/2026I was looking for it!! I found it a few weeks ago on my laptop but I can't remember which folder it's in. Will try to find it. 110
Tilskatoff 🇺🇦🏳️🌈🏳️⚧️🇬🇱 @tilskatoff.bsky.social · 22/08/2026Post a picture that should be an album cover 182
Tilskatoff 🇺🇦🏳️🌈🏳️⚧️🇬🇱 @tilskatoff.bsky.social · 21/08/2026Just doing some family tree on Ancestry and just hit a classic case of "tell me you're American without telling me you're American" 000
Tilskatoff 🇺🇦🏳️🌈🏳️⚧️🇬🇱 @tilskatoff.bsky.social · 21/08/2026Just woke up from a scary dream about losing my kids in a weird, expansive soft play facility. There was a man shouting the names of his kids...their names were 'Souness' and 'Graeme'. 030
Tilskatoff 🇺🇦🏳️🌈🏳️⚧️🇬🇱 @tilskatoff.bsky.social · 14/08/2026Very disappointed this scene wasn't in it. 010
Tilskatoff 🇺🇦🏳️🌈🏳️⚧️🇬🇱 @tilskatoff.bsky.social · 14/08/2026Just daydreaming about a lovely downpour and I really do think that petrichor could have been the name of the fourth Wise Man who just didn't make the cut.... ....or maybe he just slept through his alarm....or maybe I'm too hot and it's too early to be enjoying a beer. 000
Tilskatoff 🇺🇦🏳️🌈🏳️⚧️🇬🇱 @tilskatoff.bsky.social · 11/08/2026"Are you alright in there Mr President?" "Yes! I'm fine!.......DON'T OPEN THE DOOR!!" 000
Tilskatoff 🇺🇦🏳️🌈🏳️⚧️🇬🇱 @tilskatoff.bsky.social · 11/08/2026Why did this immediately make me think of that possum who broke into a bakery and ate so much that when the doors were opened in the morning, he was too engorged to move? 120
Tilskatoff 🇺🇦🏳️🌈🏳️⚧️🇬🇱 @tilskatoff.bsky.social · 11/08/2026Postman has just delivered a load of junk mail. Might order a cock and balls pizza for dinner tonight. 020
Tilskatoff 🇺🇦🏳️🌈🏳️⚧️🇬🇱 @tilskatoff.bsky.social · 11/08/2026Impossible not to imagine the expression of the person who set yesterday's Keywords puzzle. 010
Reposted by Tilskatoff 🇺🇦🏳️🌈🏳️⚧️🇬🇱Brian Groom @groomb.bsky.social · 10/08/2026New discovery near Stonehenge puts 'women at the centre of early Bronze Age society'. www.bbc.co.uk/news/article...bbc.co.ukNew discovery puts 'women at the centre of early Bronze Age society'The 4,000-year-old skeleton of a metalworker was first found in 1803. 13812
Tilskatoff 🇺🇦🏳️🌈🏳️⚧️🇬🇱 @tilskatoff.bsky.social · 10/08/2026It was so good, it was the perfect sandwich with a big side order of relief and some quality stolen time with my lovely Dad ☺️ 110
Tilskatoff 🇺🇦🏳️🌈🏳️⚧️🇬🇱 @tilskatoff.bsky.social · 10/08/2026At 16, I bunked off school. When I got home, I was horrified to see my Dad. He wasn't really meant to be at home either. I waited for a bollocking, but he just said "Fancy a sausage sandwich?". We then watched an old war film together tucking into our glorious sarnies. I think about that a lot. 1434
Tilskatoff 🇺🇦🏳️🌈🏳️⚧️🇬🇱 @tilskatoff.bsky.social · 08/08/2026What Count Dracula says when his servants aren't pulling their weight. 000
Tilskatoff 🇺🇦🏳️🌈🏳️⚧️🇬🇱 @tilskatoff.bsky.social · 08/08/2026Yesterday on the motorway, I had only just finished telling my son about my irrational+highly unfair sense that people with bikes on the back of their cars are middle class wankers, when I saw this..... 020
Tilskatoff 🇺🇦🏳️🌈🏳️⚧️🇬🇱 @tilskatoff.bsky.social · 07/08/2026Your Temu parcel has left Yangzhou and is en route via Space X.static.klipy.comOperation Teapot NukeALT: Operation Teapot Nuke 010