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Tim Ryder

@thisistimryder.com

477 followers 667 following 23 posts

Writer/Performer/Director. MST3K, Second City, other stuff. I hit my head on a lot of things, maybe that explains it. thisistimryder.com

Posts Replies Media

Reposted by Tim Ryder

Arnie Niekamp @arnieniekamp.bsky.social · 12/01/2026

We’re back from break and honestly the next few episodes are all-timers starting with the return of @thisistimryder.com as DQ the elf. We’re in Pizza Hell. It all makes sense.

Tim Ryder @thisistimryder.com · 08/03/2025

Wasn’t expecting to receive overt sexism from my washer/dryer today, but here we are

An iPhone notification from LG ThinQ. It reads, “Honor Women, Simplify Life! This International Women’s Day, take a moment to celebrate and enjoy what matters most. Let ThinQ handle the laundry - schedule a cycle now!”

Tim Ryder @thisistimryder.com · 07/01/2025

Really looking forward to reading this. I wrote with Mike on an episode of MST3K and he's hilarious and a great writer. Also, video games are the best.

Reposted by Tim Ryder

Nadine Whitney @nadinewhitney.bsky.social · 31/12/2024

Happy New Year from Dorothy Parker (and me).

Telegram sent by author Dorothy Parker to Robert Benchley on December 31st 1929.

Text reads.

You come right over here and explain why they are having another year.

Tim Ryder @thisistimryder.com · 31/12/2024

Too chaste to investigate, but I have to imagine this incredible line delivery is now mostly used to react to porn

media.tenor.com

a man with a beard is making a surprised face and the word wow is visible in the foreground

Alt: GIF of Daniel Stern in Home Alone 2 looking up and saying, “Wow. What a hole.”

Reposted by Tim Ryder

actioncookbook @actioncookbook.com · 20/12/2024

screenshot of a tweet from actioncookbook on 5/7/2020:

Every article about a major retailer going bankrupt spends eight paragraphs musing “I guess millennials just don’t buy shirts?” before casually mentioning a private equity acquisition three years ago in one sentence at the end

Reposted by Tim Ryder

The Onion @theonion.com · 19/12/2024

Ho, Ho, Ho, I'm Regrowing My Foreskin!

Ho, Ho, Ho, I'm Regrowing My Foreskin!

YouTube video by The Onion

Tim Ryder @thisistimryder.com · 19/12/2024

Well well well…looks like someone read a decade-old satirical opinion piece I wrote for a long-defunct comedy platform…

Cartoon image of Krypto the Superdog. He’s got a red cape and is a very good boy.

Article: “There's Something Missing From These Superman Reboots”
by Krypto the Superdog

Another year, another attempt at rebooting the Superman franchise. I can't say I'm surprised. A new director, a new vision, a new actor donning the cape – in terms of actors playing the same role, we're
approaching Doctor Who territory and that's not a good thing.

But no one's addressing the big problem with Superman: he's an alien! Pretend he's an all-American boy all you want, he's still foreign and unapproachable. He needs something to humanize him. If only
he had some kind of furry companion to make him more relatable.

Oh wait, he TOTALLY DOES. IT'S ME.

Article continues: And before you say anything, this isn't about the money. I've still got some residuals coming in from the cartoon and I'm the mascot of a local Chevy dealer down here in Temecula, so ol' Krypto's doing just fine. I just want the movie to be good.

And I'm not saying I need to be a huge part of it. I'm not asking for a big action sequence – just some side by side flying, a couple of laser eye-blasts, maybe a hilarious misunderstanding where Superman throws a stick and I bring back the Eiffel Tower.

Article concludes: Okay, now the creative juices are flowing. How about we make this thing more of a buddy comedy – he's the strait-laced crimefighter, I'm the loose cannon. Like a superpowered Turner & Hooch. Like maybe we're on a stakeout and Supes is all, “Krypto, are you paying attention?” and then he looks back and I'm peeing on his cape. That's your trailer moment right there!

It just makes sense! Think of the merchandising alone! Kids love animals. I'm an animal. Let's sell some damn Happy Meals!

But I'm probably just kidding myself, right? You dumbasses are just going to put Superman on a fishing trawler, make him all moody, have Kevin Costner say some folksy bullshit and call it a day. Good luck
with that. Can't wait to see the next reboot in two years.

Give me a call when you're ready to make a fucking Superman movie.

Tim Ryder @thisistimryder.com · 02/12/2024

I’m just glad to live in a world where Strong Bad still reviews fan costumes. Or, as is the case this year, costume. youtu.be/s0-_WzSfQe8?...

Fanstume [singular] 2024

YouTube video by homestarrunnerdotcom

Tim Ryder @thisistimryder.com · 29/11/2024

Happy Turkey Day to us all!

Tim Ryder @thisistimryder.com · 25/11/2024

I can't believe we're doing this again