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Paul Bassett Davies

@thewritertype.bsky.social
6.8K followers 832 following 4.6K posts

Writer in residence, at my house. To look upon my works, ye mighty, visit my website: www.thewritertype.com

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Paul Bassett Davies @thewritertype.bsky.social · 25/09/2026
It’s not that Kemi Badenoch isn’t reading the room, it’s that the room she’s reading is the dining hall in the workhouse from Oliver Twist, while she and her friends sit in armchairs around a fire, delivering morally improving lectures to the paupers.
Photo of Kemi Bedanoch; headline about punishing benefit claimants.
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Paul Bassett Davies @thewritertype.bsky.social · 15/09/2026
I’ve made an AI generated actress, just like whatshername. Realistic, isn’t she? Or maybe he. Anyway, please interview him so he can promote my books.
Ventriloquist doll.
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Paul Bassett Davies @thewritertype.bsky.social · 02/09/2026
Medieval parents trying to make their kid get up and go to school on the first day back after the summer holidays.
Stained glass window showing man and woman lamenting over lifeless body.
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Paul Bassett Davies @thewritertype.bsky.social · 12/08/2026
Watching an eclipse? Be safe, people.
Head shot of person in a zipped gimp mask smoking a pipe.
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Paul Bassett Davies @thewritertype.bsky.social · 07/08/2026
Please do not use artificial intelligence to design brand new viruses. Have you never seen ANY fucking movies? If you were in a remote cabin in the woods, you'd be the one who says, "What's that that creepy noise coming from the basement? I'd better go down there in my underwear to investigate."
headline ARTIFICIAL INTELLIGENCE USED TO DESIGN BRAND NEW VIRUSES and stock photo of two people looking at computer screens
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Paul Bassett Davies @thewritertype.bsky.social · 23/07/2026
And before he was EBENEZER he was EMBRYO. And before he was EMBRYO he was SPERMATOZOON and EGG. There’s three more unnecessary garbage prequels right there, lazy Hollywood dickheads.
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Paul Bassett Davies @thewritertype.bsky.social · 23/07/2026
Mohammed bin Salman: it is our custom to take many wives. TRUMP: Ha ha, mine too! MBS: We persecute our migrant workers. TRUMP: Same here! MBS: We imprison, torture and murder journalists, regime critics and dissidents. TRUMP: Working on that, but I'm getting there!
Mohammed bin Salman and Trump looking repulsively happy together.
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Paul Bassett Davies @thewritertype.bsky.social · 14/05/2026
NARRATOR: but weather was in fact available. All of it.
Weather app message: “Weather Unavailable”
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Paul Bassett Davies @thewritertype.bsky.social · 17/04/2026
My darkly funny dystopian novel "Please do not Ask for Mercy as a Refusal Often Offends," (what if Blade Runner but Inspector Clouseau) is getting less dystopian by the day. Read it NOW before reality overtakes it. www.amazon.co.uk/Please-Mercy...
quote of review for novel "Echoes of Douglas Adams at his more mischievous. Top marks for originality and subversive humour."
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Paul Bassett Davies @thewritertype.bsky.social · 07/04/2026
From LinkedIn. WANTED: skilled craftsperson to construct electric chair in which we will execute you.
Job description from LinkedIn seeking writer to work on checking and polishing AI versions of novels, stories and plays.
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Paul Bassett Davies @thewritertype.bsky.social · 07/04/2026
President Trump flanked by an imaginary cartoon character and a rabbit.
Trump with Melania on his right and the Easter bunny on his left.
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Paul Bassett Davies @thewritertype.bsky.social · 04/04/2026
At Easter we ponder the miraculous transformation of Jesus from a dead Levantine mystic into a perfectly groomed 1970s Californian surfer.
Kitsch image of Christ as a very white dude.
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Paul Bassett Davies @thewritertype.bsky.social · 14/03/2026
Happy birthday to Albert Einstein, who revolutionised physics by disproving the theory of gravity with his hair.
Einstein with hair looking particularly wild.
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Paul Bassett Davies @thewritertype.bsky.social · 20/02/2026
“Cats may hold clues for human cancer treatment,” but unfortunately they’re methodically pushing them off the laboratory bench and onto the floor, one by one, while maintaining unbroken eye contact with you.
BBC News headline saying cats may hold clues to human cancer treatment illustrated by picture of self-satisfied cat being stroked.
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Paul Bassett Davies @thewritertype.bsky.social · 24/01/2026
Finally it makes sense. Trump was three penguins in a long overcoat all this time.
AI generated White House picture of Trump and a penguin hand-in-hand, walking away to enjoy a night of igloo passion in the Arctic (where there are no penguins, doh.)
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Paul Bassett Davies @thewritertype.bsky.social · 23/01/2026
Bad news. If they can’t afford an equestrian statue they could at least put her on an e-bike.
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Paul Bassett Davies @thewritertype.bsky.social · 18/01/2026
Yet another rat abandons the sinking ship and climbs aboard the sinking lifeboat instead.
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Paul Bassett Davies @thewritertype.bsky.social · 11/01/2026
Instead of banning under-16s from social media, the Tories should actually recruit some under-16s to RUN their social media, to stop them coming across as such tragic plonkers every time they venture online.
Headline and blurred image of young people using phone.
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Paul Bassett Davies @thewritertype.bsky.social · 04/01/2026
I feel so much safer now America is once again fulfilling its rightful role as Global Policeman.
Monochrome photo of British music hall performer  as the laughing policeman.
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Paul Bassett Davies @thewritertype.bsky.social · 30/12/2025
Happy birthday to the magnificent Patti Smith. SCOOP THE PEARLS UP FROM THE SEA.
Photo of Patti Smith looking regally at camera
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Paul Bassett Davies @thewritertype.bsky.social · 22/12/2025
Very pleased to have won third prize in the Hammond House international Literary Prize. What a lovely Christmas present. Congratulations to the top two.
List of top three Hammond House short story winners.
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Paul Bassett Davies @thewritertype.bsky.social · 06/12/2025
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Paul Bassett Davies @thewritertype.bsky.social · 25/11/2025
Whether in a school, a family or a workplace, "banter," like "teasing," is often about power and dominance. The giveaway is that if the powerless try to "banter" back, or the victim tries to tease the teaser, they’re told they're being oversensitive or even hostile.
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Paul Bassett Davies @thewritertype.bsky.social · 09/11/2025
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Paul Bassett Davies @thewritertype.bsky.social · 30/10/2025
The “hard men of Gondor” were whiny, belligerent posers. The hobbits were peace-loving communitarians who liked music, drinking and dancing, but they were also brave and resourceful, and when shit happened they got the job done. As usual, you’ve picked the wrong side, my dude.
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Paul Bassett Davies @thewritertype.bsky.social · 26/09/2025
Tony Blair is hovering over Gaza like a sanctimonious vulture. Media editors are reminded that Mr. Tony can be ready to deliver his unctuous opinions on any topic at 45 minutes notice for the right price.
Tony Blair looking particularly pleased with himself and rather sinister
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Paul Bassett Davies @thewritertype.bsky.social · 08/09/2025
A beautiful Kingfisher outside my window in Brighton Marina. I’m thrilled to see one this close. It’s the first time.
A beautiful kingfisher in the morning sunshine perching on the deck railing of my houseboat in Brighton Marina.
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Paul Bassett Davies @thewritertype.bsky.social · 01/09/2025
Medieval parents trying to make their kid get up and go to school on the first day back after the summer holiday.
Medieval stained glass illustration showing two adults lamenting over a recumbent figure.
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Paul Bassett Davies @thewritertype.bsky.social · 26/08/2025
Just spitballing here, but maybe postpone the idea of giving humans rights to AI until we’ve managed to give human rights to humans.
Photo of Guardian article headline: “Can AIs suffer?” Plus image of neural pathways imposed over human head.
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Paul Bassett Davies @thewritertype.bsky.social · 16/08/2025
These are the first 5 of Umberto Eco’s List of the 14 Common Features of Fascism. We are currently witnessing number 3, especially, on a daily basis.
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Paul Bassett Davies @thewritertype.bsky.social · 01/08/2025
Typical. If I'd known we were all about to perish in a thermonuclear apocalypse I wouldn't have gone to all the trouble of verifying my age.
Breaking: Trump moves nuclear submarines after ex-Russian president's comments.
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Paul Bassett Davies @thewritertype.bsky.social · 01/08/2025
Exclusive picture: Trump’s envoy to the Middle East inspects conditions in Gaza.
Engraving of Admiral Nelson holding a telescope to his blind eye that’s covered by a patch.
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Paul Bassett Davies @thewritertype.bsky.social · 22/07/2025
Great news for Ghislaine Maxwell. Not only will the DOJ offer her a pardon if she does what they want, they’ll even give her a complementary designer t-shirt to wear when she’s released!
Picture of t-shirt with target and “AIM HERE” on it.
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Paul Bassett Davies @thewritertype.bsky.social · 19/07/2025
I was stung by a wasp so I'm drinking whiskey as an antidote. It was a few years ago now, but you can't be too careful.
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Paul Bassett Davies @thewritertype.bsky.social · 15/05/2025
Magna Carta is a surprisingly short document, although it was nearly much longer. One of the signatories suggested opening a Comments & Replies section but fortunately he was executed.
photo of newly-discovered manuscript once considered an unofficial copy of Magna Carta but now believed to be a genuine version.
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Paul Bassett Davies @thewritertype.bsky.social · 17/04/2025
My dystopian comedy thriller, Please do not Ask for Mercy as a Refusal Often Offends, (what if Blade Runner, but Inspector Clouseau) is getting less dystopian by the day. Read it NOW, before reality overtakes it. www.amazon.co.uk/Please-Mercy...
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Paul Bassett Davies @thewritertype.bsky.social · 02/04/2025
It’s true. I’ve had a few drinks and I fucken love fruit flies. They’re my besht mates in the whole world.
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Paul Bassett Davies @thewritertype.bsky.social · 27/03/2025
In case you were clinging pathetically to a final, lingering hope that a tiny spark of light might still flicker in the Stygian wasteland of the human spirit, the word Gigil, meaning overwhelming cuteness, has been added to the dictionary. *takes whisky and revolver into study and locks door*
Picture of cute fluffy kitten
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Paul Bassett Davies @thewritertype.bsky.social · 25/03/2025
Are you ok babe? You've hardly played with your rubber Mikhail Gorbachev today.
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Paul Bassett Davies @thewritertype.bsky.social · 23/03/2025
Mark Zuckerberg has stolen all my published books. If he'd bought the paperback editions it would come to about £65 in total. But it's your lucky day, Mark, old son, because I'm prepared to accept fifty quid. Give me a contact and I'll ping you an invoice, you creepy little prick.
A list of five out of six of my published books that are in the LIbGen database tool showing work that Meta has stolen to train its AI on.
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Paul Bassett Davies @thewritertype.bsky.social · 20/03/2025
The instinct to correct seems almost universal. The competence to do so, not so much.
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Paul Bassett Davies @thewritertype.bsky.social · 07/03/2025
This is outrageous. I'd write a letter of complaint, but I can't afford to.
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Paul Bassett Davies @thewritertype.bsky.social · 26/02/2025
Being an adult is when you stop checking for monsters under the bed, and accept that your pervasive feelings of dread are caused by the knowledge that the fossil fuel industry is committed to killing you and everyone you love for money, and our leaders are happy to help them.
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Paul Bassett Davies @thewritertype.bsky.social · 05/02/2025
One horseman short of the full apocalypse.
Netanyahu, Trump and Musk smiling to camera like a trio of ghouls from your nightmares.
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Paul Bassett Davies @thewritertype.bsky.social · 29/01/2025
Royal baby! Congratulations to Princess Beatrice and her husband. Of course, in France they call a royal baby a Royale with Cheese.
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Paul Bassett Davies @thewritertype.bsky.social · 28/01/2025
I feel your pain, sad billionaires, and will express my sympathy through the medium of hearty laughter.
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Paul Bassett Davies @thewritertype.bsky.social · 21/01/2025
Trump’s signature is getting bigger all the time. Soon it will be visible from space. Years from now, an alien, like the traveller in Shelley’s Ozymandias, will report seeing it scrawled in giant letters across the desert landscape of the wasteland that was once our planet.
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Paul Bassett Davies @thewritertype.bsky.social · 05/01/2025
My thoughts are with Nigel Farage at this difficult moment for him. Those thoughts are as follows: 1. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha. 2. *breathe* 3. Ha ha ha ha ha ha fucking ha.
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Paul Bassett Davies @thewritertype.bsky.social · 28/12/2024
I didn’t expect bees, says man who purchased beehive.
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Paul Bassett Davies @thewritertype.bsky.social · 27/11/2024
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