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Eric Schmidt

@talkingschmidt.bsky.social

1.4K followers 582 following 338 posts

Comedian. Actor. Model? Comedy seen on Cracked, in the Washington Post and Chicago Tribune. Voice heard in ads for Grubhub, Natty Light and OneWheel. Former Letterman Page. Award nominated screenwriter. Live Snakes at the Gutter in Williamsburg

Posts Replies Media

Eric Schmidt @talkingschmidt.bsky.social · 25/09/2026

If you share AI “art,” I’m going to assume you’re also a cruise person

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Eric Schmidt @talkingschmidt.bsky.social · 17/09/2026

About to get to the bottom of this whole “AI” thing

Eric Schmidt @talkingschmidt.bsky.social · 10/09/2026

If Trump says the ruling class can afford to send you $5000, imagine what they can ACTUALLY afford

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Eric Schmidt @talkingschmidt.bsky.social · 17/08/2026

Coolest thing about being an adult who lives in a big city has gotta be how I can get an empanada whenever I want

Eric Schmidt @talkingschmidt.bsky.social · 08/08/2026

I’m fiscally Lynyrd Skynyrd, socially Neil Young

Eric Schmidt @talkingschmidt.bsky.social · 03/08/2026

First they came for the lettuce…

Eric Schmidt @talkingschmidt.bsky.social · 29/07/2026

It’s not enough to release proof of life pictures. Mitch McConnell should release a duets album with Bruno Mars

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Eric Schmidt @talkingschmidt.bsky.social · 28/07/2026

“Michelob Ultra” is way too badass of a name for water beer

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Eric Schmidt @talkingschmidt.bsky.social · 12/07/2026

I’m just glad Mitch McConnell isn’t alive to see all of your little jokes about this

Eric Schmidt @talkingschmidt.bsky.social · 07/07/2026

“I spoke to Mitch McConnell this morning”

Eric Schmidt @talkingschmidt.bsky.social · 07/07/2026

It’s possible Mitch McConnell emerges from the hospital with big ol butt implants

Eric Schmidt @talkingschmidt.bsky.social · 30/06/2026

Watching “On Golden Pond” and first of all, that is a lake

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Eric Schmidt @talkingschmidt.bsky.social · 28/06/2026

Mamdani Pool Trump Pool

Eric Schmidt @talkingschmidt.bsky.social · 13/06/2026

Trump is very close to making a deal with the algae

Reposted by Eric Schmidt

Kevin McCaffrey @kevinmccaff.bsky.social · 13/06/2026

This is the first time James Harden has been dangerous during the playoffs

Eric Schmidt @talkingschmidt.bsky.social · 27/05/2026

The pilot picked the funniest possible time to pause the movie for an announcement

Eric Schmidt @talkingschmidt.bsky.social · 25/05/2026

New York City is so nice after it rains. l went to Central Park, and kids are throwing handfuls of water at each other

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Eric Schmidt @talkingschmidt.bsky.social · 22/05/2026

Guy who only kinda pays attention to the news trying to make small talk: “So I hear Jay Leno died.”

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Eric Schmidt @talkingschmidt.bsky.social · 26/04/2026

He’s looking for his friend with the bag

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Eric Schmidt @talkingschmidt.bsky.social · 19/04/2026

“I’m Johnny Knoxville and I’m crashing a plane.”

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Eric Schmidt @talkingschmidt.bsky.social · 19/04/2026

I was at Sony recording studios yesterday and someone asked me if I was Rick Rubin

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Eric Schmidt @talkingschmidt.bsky.social · 18/04/2026

LA is great if you live in a cool and nice neighborhood and never EVER have to leave it

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Eric Schmidt @talkingschmidt.bsky.social · 15/04/2026

I’m all for TMZ taking down members of congress for their bad behavior. I just wish their powers worked on presidents too

Eric Schmidt @talkingschmidt.bsky.social · 14/04/2026

Trump claims that was a picture of him as a carpenter

Eric Schmidt @talkingschmidt.bsky.social · 08/04/2026

He’s just white trash America’s most recent fad. Wish this one had been harmless like Beanie Babies

Eric Schmidt @talkingschmidt.bsky.social · 08/04/2026

I have Christian, Muslim, and Jewish friends and we all get along just fine because we’re all atheists

Eric Schmidt @talkingschmidt.bsky.social · 05/04/2026

Dudes will describe a girl as “goth” and then you see her and she’s just a brunette

Eric Schmidt @talkingschmidt.bsky.social · 03/04/2026

As a leftist New Yorker, I’m smug as ever. Hope you enjoy your cars, shitheads

Eric Schmidt @talkingschmidt.bsky.social · 01/04/2026

Trump: “Let them eat steak.”

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Eric Schmidt @talkingschmidt.bsky.social · 31/03/2026

He was coming from a meeting with the other Dick Tracy bad guys

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Eric Schmidt @talkingschmidt.bsky.social · 30/03/2026

Christian Laettner on the Dream Team has big Dan Aykroyd on “We Are the World” energy

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Eric Schmidt @talkingschmidt.bsky.social · 22/03/2026

Carless New Yorkers seeing conservative friends and family in red states complain about gas prices on social media

Eric Schmidt @talkingschmidt.bsky.social · 22/03/2026

This is how I feel hanging with my friends who live in Bushwick

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Eric Schmidt @talkingschmidt.bsky.social · 17/03/2026

I love how click-baity and coy Fox News is when someone dies. Can’t wait to see “The Apprentice host dead at 79.”

Eric Schmidt @talkingschmidt.bsky.social · 11/03/2026

I often think about how bummed I’ll be if I’m not in New York City when he dies

Eric Schmidt @talkingschmidt.bsky.social · 09/03/2026

Donna Kelce on her way to the paint store

Eric Schmidt @talkingschmidt.bsky.social · 09/03/2026

Complaining about gas prices is kinda insensitive to those of us who don’t have cars cuz we live in New York

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Eric Schmidt @talkingschmidt.bsky.social · 07/03/2026

They gotta start screening people who sit in exit rows. There’s an old woman who keeps accidentally playing music at full volume from her phone and then her and her husband scramble to try to turn it off and I just don’t trust that they’ll be very helpful in an emergency

Eric Schmidt @talkingschmidt.bsky.social · 01/03/2026

“We gotta go kill their oppressive religious right wing leaders” -American and Israeli oppressive religious right wing leaders

Eric Schmidt @talkingschmidt.bsky.social · 25/02/2026

If they didn’t want to get hit by snowballs, they shouldn’t have dressed like that

Eric Schmidt @talkingschmidt.bsky.social · 20/02/2026

Tampa Bay Buccaneers Logo (Early Draft)

Eric Schmidt @talkingschmidt.bsky.social · 12/02/2026

Kid Rock makes music for people who can’t figure out how to use chopsticks

Eric Schmidt @talkingschmidt.bsky.social · 10/02/2026

It’s gotta be weird for country club republicans to pretend to like Kid Rock while already pretending to like Donald Trump

Eric Schmidt @talkingschmidt.bsky.social · 10/02/2026

I keep getting profiled because of my appearance. People assume I watched the Kid Rock halftime show. I haven’t listened to Kid Rock since I was in 8th grade which is the only age it’s appropriate to be a fan of his

Eric Schmidt @talkingschmidt.bsky.social · 06/02/2026

Turning Point USA halftime show

Eric Schmidt @talkingschmidt.bsky.social · 25/01/2026

Government officials killed a white guy with a legally concealed firearm. I feel like this is the kind of thing white guys with legally concealed firearms would be mad about if they hadn’t become worthless pawns of the state

Eric Schmidt @talkingschmidt.bsky.social · 22/01/2026

Inviting friends to a Trump rally

Eric Schmidt @talkingschmidt.bsky.social · 17/01/2026

I know what he can do to try to turn her straight

Eric Schmidt @talkingschmidt.bsky.social · 17/01/2026

Oh, you’ll know I’m American. I’m overweight and unfashionable.

Eric Schmidt @talkingschmidt.bsky.social · 15/01/2026

Oh great now Germany is the good guys and we’re the bad guys