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robert wagner

@swedetrap.bsky.social
633 followers 252 following 2.2K posts

podcaster. audio artist. b-list international dj & unintentional man of mystery. dad. husband. brother. son. uncle. cat mom. antichrist, anarchist, feminist - in no particular order.

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robert wagner @swedetrap.bsky.social · 10/09/2026
dude is so fat and unaware that maybe all three things are true
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robert wagner @swedetrap.bsky.social · 10/09/2026
oh hey, someone finally realized Matt Mullenweg lost his mind and did something about it. i’m genuinely shocked.
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robert wagner @swedetrap.bsky.social · 27/08/2026
The best part about these Ted Lasso ads is that they never let this dickhead speak in them. And for that, I am grateful.
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robert wagner @swedetrap.bsky.social · 26/08/2026
God created anal sex, blowjobs, BDSM, furries, and every other (so called) deviant sex taboo out there. God is woke AF. God gave humankind the knowledge to make dildos and lube. God is a pervert. And don't let Ricky Schroder or that dumb cunt from Growing Pains tell you any different.
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robert wagner @swedetrap.bsky.social · 26/08/2026
If you think about it, there are probably close to 100,000 better ways Oregon lawmakers could spend their time, that aren't taking free out of state trips to hear the sales pitches of bottom feeder trash like Google/Alphabet/Waymo. www.oregonlive.com/politics/202...
oregonlive.com
Waymo wants Oregon officials to experience its Arizona robotaxis — on the company’s dime
Waymo’s efforts are the latest indication it’s pushing hard ahead of the next legislative session to enter the Oregon market.
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robert wagner @swedetrap.bsky.social · 19/08/2026
RIP Frank Beard. No one else played a straight 8-beat quite like him.
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robert wagner @swedetrap.bsky.social · 19/08/2026
sure but safer neighborhoods
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robert wagner @swedetrap.bsky.social · 14/08/2026
Why are we body shaming thin hollywood actors again? i thought we had moved past that.
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robert wagner @swedetrap.bsky.social · 12/08/2026
I remember buying that right after it came out. I wanted to love it so bad.
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robert wagner @swedetrap.bsky.social · 12/08/2026
The nonsense YouTube/IG videos dissing Lars Ulrich's drumming skills are hilarious. Is he the greatest drummer ever? Not by a mile. But is it fair to compare yourself, drumming in your mom's basement, to a video of a 62-year old band marketing genius, a full 2 hours into a grueling concert? No.
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robert wagner @swedetrap.bsky.social · 10/08/2026
Threads: brain dead algorithmic crap designed to engage me in political conversation. Twitter: brain dead right wing crap designed to engage me in political conversation. And bots. Bluesky: brain dead left wing crap designed to engage me in political conversation. Solution: read a book.
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robert wagner @swedetrap.bsky.social · 08/08/2026
Good. Fuck Meta.
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robert wagner @swedetrap.bsky.social · 06/08/2026
Funny you should mention since today is Madden day. And the third year in a row I’ve NOT bothered to get a copy.
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robert wagner @swedetrap.bsky.social · 06/08/2026
I had no idea classic rock legends Boston had a new album! Clearly they aren’t aware either. music.apple.com/us/album/one...
music.apple.com
One More Night by Boston on Apple Music
Album · 2026 · 11 Songs
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robert wagner @swedetrap.bsky.social · 06/08/2026
So many comments come to mind here that i’m not even sure which to put forth. wow.
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robert wagner @swedetrap.bsky.social · 06/08/2026
Dear bands. Next time you’re on tour and Good Charlotte opens for you (because dog shit never headlines) do music lovers a favor and slap those fucks.
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robert wagner @swedetrap.bsky.social · 06/08/2026
Not to sound old or anything but I think the guitar solo died sometime during the 70s. Everything now is so ‘beedly-beedly-beedly’ vs melodic or interesting. Like listening to someone masturbate.
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robert wagner @swedetrap.bsky.social · 04/08/2026
Nothing bores me as much as AI. • Not sitting in a waiting room • Not having no wi-fi • Not unskippable YouTube ads • Not the latest on Meghan Markle • Not doing the dishes • Not the 7th inning stretch • Not watching golf • Not politics • Not being stuck on hold • Not the Starbucks line Nothing.
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robert wagner @swedetrap.bsky.social · 03/08/2026
If you're an American with an "underlying condition," you should wake up and realize that this makes you something of a 2nd class citizen, at least in the eyes of government and media. Got sick? Died? Oh, well obviously you would have, YOU had an underlying condition.
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robert wagner @swedetrap.bsky.social · 02/08/2026
Yeah me too. It’s what got me back into following soccer tbh.
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robert wagner @swedetrap.bsky.social · 02/08/2026
It is. It’ll continue to shake the Sounders for weeks to come. The rivalry has traditionally been fairly equal. These past few years it’s been anything but.
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robert wagner @swedetrap.bsky.social · 02/08/2026
Tell me you’re panicking without telling me you’re panicking
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robert wagner @swedetrap.bsky.social · 02/08/2026
No shit.
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robert wagner @swedetrap.bsky.social · 02/08/2026
The studio control room is pretty much my happiest place on earth.
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robert wagner @swedetrap.bsky.social · 29/07/2026
Remember that social app from a long time ago that would scrape all of your social feeds and put them into one app? I want that back. This bouncing between 7 different platforms is bullshit.
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robert wagner @swedetrap.bsky.social · 29/07/2026
Again? Not at all surprised. Jared Leto is pure trash. If a dog attacked someone you’d put it down. For whatever reason, we aren’t allowed to do that when Hollywood trash and crap d-list emo rock stars attack women.
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robert wagner @swedetrap.bsky.social · 29/07/2026
We ran out of feeezer space for the dead. It doesn’t get worse. And i couldn’t give less a fuck about its impact on car companies, movie theaters, or retailers. We ran out of fucking freezer space for dead bodies!
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robert wagner @swedetrap.bsky.social · 29/07/2026
But let’s test his low testosterone first, ok?
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robert wagner @swedetrap.bsky.social · 29/07/2026
That we are spending time and money grilling Anthony Fauci at a Senate hearing is absurd no matter how you look at it. Even if I were a flat earth, stolen election, covid-denying moron, what difference could any of this possibly make now? It’s been over for half a decade. Move on.
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robert wagner @swedetrap.bsky.social · 29/07/2026
The best part of YouTube is watching old recordings of live music. The worst part of YouTube is that it reminded me how often Paul Shaffer and his band would join the musical guests on Letterman. Ain’t no Paul in L7 ffs.
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robert wagner @swedetrap.bsky.social · 24/07/2026
well there’s the whole “can’t read;hate trans people” thing.
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robert wagner @swedetrap.bsky.social · 24/07/2026
Dogs are better at this than the democrats at this point. Got it.
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robert wagner @swedetrap.bsky.social · 24/07/2026
You know you live in an emotionally distressed world when you open your browser and see "Jimothy" placing #1 in trending topics. Nothing says "I'm desperate for anything other than the stupid political scandal du jour" quite like a deformed raccoon dominating conversation.
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robert wagner @swedetrap.bsky.social · 21/07/2026
Google+. Social media world killer if ever there wasn’t one.
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robert wagner @swedetrap.bsky.social · 21/07/2026
In other words, don’t panic. It’s stupid. Your government and your media are stupid. Don’t be stupid like they are.
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robert wagner @swedetrap.bsky.social · 21/07/2026
Remember when we were supposed to panic because China would have better 5G internet than us? Remember when we were supposed to panic because China would have better phones than us? Remember when we were supposed to panic because China would have a better space program than us? Insert AI. Same.
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Reposted by robert wagner
robert wagner @swedetrap.bsky.social · 17/07/2026
Some people drop mics. I don't have that kind of budget. So, let's drop a trailer instead. Apple Podcasts: podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/p... Also on Spotify, but I don't send clicks to scammy, artist-hostile platforms. #podcast
podcasts.apple.com
PDX Sucks
Improv Podcast · Updated Weekly · From the depths of an all-new multi-hundred dollar multimedia podcast bunker in the southeast corner of the city, the Portland Sucks podcast is returning later this S...
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robert wagner @swedetrap.bsky.social · 20/07/2026
Sometimes I like to go to guitar Reddit and simply say “Paul Reed Smith,” just to watch chumps lose their minds. I don’t own a PRS but I’ve also been playing long enough to know that a fender is a gibson is a PRS and who cares?
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robert wagner @swedetrap.bsky.social · 18/07/2026
Be safe, Ashley. And thank you. But really, above all, please be safe.
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robert wagner @swedetrap.bsky.social · 17/07/2026
Some people drop mics. I don't have that kind of budget. So, let's drop a trailer instead. Apple Podcasts: podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/p... Also on Spotify, but I don't send clicks to scammy, artist-hostile platforms. #podcast
podcasts.apple.com
PDX Sucks
Improv Podcast · Updated Weekly · From the depths of an all-new multi-hundred dollar multimedia podcast bunker in the southeast corner of the city, the Portland Sucks podcast is returning later this S...
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robert wagner @swedetrap.bsky.social · 17/07/2026
if so, you were the president. it would’ve been up to you and your cronies to figure this out. you didn’t. a competent president would have. duh.
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robert wagner @swedetrap.bsky.social · 17/07/2026
What is it with Portland teams and their interim coaches? To come back from the bottom and absolutely destroy Seattle is a pretty good pitch for a permanent job right? At least through the rest of the season.
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robert wagner @swedetrap.bsky.social · 16/07/2026
The only thing I miss about World Cup now that it's over (because let's face it, you already know who FIFA is going to give the trophy to) is Erling Haaland. The memes have slowed down, the YouTube and Instagram algorithms have moved on. It's truly sad to have to return to an Erlingless reality.
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robert wagner @swedetrap.bsky.social · 16/07/2026
That would bring me next level joy.
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robert wagner @swedetrap.bsky.social · 15/07/2026
As thrilling as the World Cup was there for a bit, I'm happy that it's over for me. Now that FIFA's favorite fuck baby is heading to the final match, I can blissfully ignore it again for 4 years and go do something else. Oh hey, MLS is starting back up this week. That works.
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robert wagner @swedetrap.bsky.social · 15/07/2026
Yes. Love it.
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robert wagner @swedetrap.bsky.social · 13/07/2026
Unfortunately she’s not. I think she’s educating the next generation of juvenile delinquents.
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robert wagner @swedetrap.bsky.social · 13/07/2026
Yes. Please impart all of your business acumen, developed over years and years writing for near-minimum wage for a shit web publishing conglomerate, and tell us how YOU would fix a billion dollars industry that's crushing itself under its own weight. I won't defend Xbox, PS, or others, but please.
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robert wagner @swedetrap.bsky.social · 13/07/2026
RIP Sam Neill. If you've not seen it, I highly recommend In the Mouth of Madness. I think it's Mr. Neill's best work. Well, and obviously Jurassic Park 3 - the ONLY good Jurassic Park movie because there's all of 5 minutes of set up and then they get right to the dinosaurs eating people.
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robert wagner @swedetrap.bsky.social · 12/07/2026
Strange. I can manage to despise a person and still not waste a day of my life dancing on their grave on social media. I mean, that’s pretty much what separates me from said dead person on the most base level.
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