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SurlyITJesus

@surlyitjesus.bsky.social
477 followers 191 following 5.8K posts

I drink, cook, play TTRPG'S and talk shit. It's what I do...with occasional deep and highly entertaining comments drizzled in. I volunteer at New Leash Rescue. Adopt don't shop. "The best part of livin' is almost dyin'." I'm also a shitlib (apparently).

PostsRepliesMedia
SurlyITJesus @surlyitjesus.bsky.social · 22h
Tennessee thought Derrick Henry was cooked!
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SurlyITJesus @surlyitjesus.bsky.social · 12/10/2026
I'm glad Mike Hughes found a place.
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SurlyITJesus @surlyitjesus.bsky.social · 12/10/2026
JFC. Sports betting is the worst thing to happen to the NFL.
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SurlyITJesus @surlyitjesus.bsky.social · 12/10/2026
Ms. Nix....omg...what have you done to my timeline, lol!
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SurlyITJesus @surlyitjesus.bsky.social · 12/10/2026
They just did a RIP piece on the "juice box guy."
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SurlyITJesus @surlyitjesus.bsky.social · 12/10/2026
The Brazilian feed of the Niners Hawks game is fabulous.
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SurlyITJesus @surlyitjesus.bsky.social · 11/10/2026
Fuck, I called that shit. Had the Jags taken the points they would be leading RN. They had 1 second, at the one before half, passed on the points then and painted yourself into a corner now. The Jags coach is doing all he can to lose this game.
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SurlyITJesus @surlyitjesus.bsky.social · 11/10/2026
I think I just need to admit, I have no idea what a PI or roughing the passer. is anymore. Because a blatant PI just happened..yet no call.
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SurlyITJesus @surlyitjesus.bsky.social · 11/10/2026
I love all the random ass jerseys you see at an overseas NFL game
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SurlyITJesus @surlyitjesus.bsky.social · 11/10/2026
Every week we see it, 4th down and goal, going for it, instead of getting the points....only to walk away with nothing...which ends up being the difference in the game.
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SurlyITJesus @surlyitjesus.bsky.social · 11/10/2026
DEATH BY SNU SNU!!
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SurlyITJesus @surlyitjesus.bsky.social · 11/10/2026
You tell ONE woman at a funeral that you would eat her ass and all of a sudden YOU'RE the bad guy!
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SurlyITJesus @surlyitjesus.bsky.social · 10/10/2026
I'm a door dash member and I could get an 8 piece for 13.99. Sounds like daddy bout to feast on delicious fried chicken!
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Reposted by SurlyITJesus
I Love Animals @petsanimals.bsky.social · 09/10/2026
This is Meatball. He's going home for the very first time, with a human of his very own. 💕 "Share the post if you love animals."
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SurlyITJesus @surlyitjesus.bsky.social · 10/10/2026
People are edible.
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SurlyITJesus @surlyitjesus.bsky.social · 10/10/2026
Are the only black people at BYU on the football team? They sure as hell aren't in the stands....
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SurlyITJesus @surlyitjesus.bsky.social · 07/10/2026
You would make a great anime swordswoman, on a quest to become strong enough to overthrow your cruel and overbearing brother, who is also the Prince. People react negatively to the sscar on your face, but then find you are brave with a heart of gold and support you.
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SurlyITJesus @surlyitjesus.bsky.social · 07/10/2026
Silky Johnson would be proud.
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SurlyITJesus @surlyitjesus.bsky.social · 07/10/2026
I just watched this movie, lol!! I love being in on it when memes are posted...
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SurlyITJesus @surlyitjesus.bsky.social · 07/10/2026
Fuck. Now I'm going to think this everytime I see her face.
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SurlyITJesus @surlyitjesus.bsky.social · 07/10/2026
Winner, winner chicken dinner!
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Reposted by SurlyITJesus
MIRcity🇵🇷living💙in🩸Tx🌊🇺🇸"X"is fascists @mircity.bsky.social · 07/10/2026
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SurlyITJesus @surlyitjesus.bsky.social · 07/10/2026
I volunteer to pose for you, if that helps. Draw me like one of your French girls....
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SurlyITJesus @surlyitjesus.bsky.social · 04/10/2026
I'm happy for LaQuan Treadwell.
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SurlyITJesus @surlyitjesus.bsky.social · 04/10/2026
The NFL really needs to define what is and isn't roughing the passer. Deforest Buckner should have gotten one on that hit.
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SurlyITJesus @surlyitjesus.bsky.social · 04/10/2026
You should submit your art to the MN state fair. Just pick a random address. MN loves crop art.
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SurlyITJesus @surlyitjesus.bsky.social · 03/10/2026
I love Lisa Bonet, but I bet she smells like patchouli.
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SurlyITJesus @surlyitjesus.bsky.social · 03/10/2026
Right up at the very top of things I won't do, order...a freezer of meat from Temu.
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SurlyITJesus @surlyitjesus.bsky.social · 03/10/2026
Yah, there's definitely that.
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SurlyITJesus @surlyitjesus.bsky.social · 03/10/2026
Why does John Baptiste sound like a brotha that was locked up for 60 years and spent that time reading a thesaurus and now just makes up nonsense that sounds deep?
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SurlyITJesus @surlyitjesus.bsky.social · 03/10/2026
Batman:Knightfall was SOOO good! Pacing, animation, fight scenes...just so well done. At the end, when Batman is "fighting" Bane, you can't help but grimace as you watch it...even the sound affects...hearing fear behind Batmans cries is some devious work. I can't wait for part 2!
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SurlyITJesus @surlyitjesus.bsky.social · 02/10/2026
Let's not forget the classic..."It's all in the reflexes."
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SurlyITJesus @surlyitjesus.bsky.social · 02/10/2026
Playing Mo Bamba at the end was a definite choice by the Browns.
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SurlyITJesus @surlyitjesus.bsky.social · 02/10/2026
No one saw that QB sneak coming
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SurlyITJesus @surlyitjesus.bsky.social · 02/10/2026
The Steelers are now seeing why an old immobile QB is a liability.
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SurlyITJesus @surlyitjesus.bsky.social · 02/10/2026
Definitely.
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SurlyITJesus @surlyitjesus.bsky.social · 02/10/2026
Nevermind.
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SurlyITJesus @surlyitjesus.bsky.social · 02/10/2026
When did the browns get a running game!!
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SurlyITJesus @surlyitjesus.bsky.social · 02/10/2026
The Browns just committed a roughing the passer penalty on the guy that the new rule was literally made for!
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SurlyITJesus @surlyitjesus.bsky.social · 29/09/2026
I love Nothing Bundt Cake!!
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SurlyITJesus @surlyitjesus.bsky.social · 29/09/2026
I feel like we are currently living in the b.y.o.b video right now.
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SurlyITJesus @surlyitjesus.bsky.social · 29/09/2026
He already has.
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SurlyITJesus @surlyitjesus.bsky.social · 29/09/2026
My BS timeline today: 1.)Trump sucks...for many reasons 2.)Maga truckers and farmers are getting what they deserve. 3.)ICE just did something horrific...again. 4.)Cornell 7 is fucked and they should be in prison. 5. Check out this homemade pizza.
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SurlyITJesus @surlyitjesus.bsky.social · 29/09/2026
Whatever happened to Blake Bortles?
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SurlyITJesus @surlyitjesus.bsky.social · 29/09/2026
At some point, I may have to apologize to my son for making him a Vikings fan.
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SurlyITJesus @surlyitjesus.bsky.social · 29/09/2026
How TF did the giants let Saquon walk? It makes not GD sense.
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SurlyITJesus @surlyitjesus.bsky.social · 29/09/2026
Food porn ....
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SurlyITJesus @surlyitjesus.bsky.social · 29/09/2026
Mahomes caused that hit on Hurts.
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SurlyITJesus @surlyitjesus.bsky.social · 29/09/2026
The Bears not getting a TD is peak Bears
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SurlyITJesus @surlyitjesus.bsky.social · 29/09/2026
Yah Troy, the bears DID have a problem in the red zone last week....it was called the Vikings Defense.
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