Occam’s Razor Burn @stochasticnoise.bsky.social · 22/09/2026Is anybody else having trouble getting the Fat Bear Week voting widget to load? 030
Occam’s Razor Burn @stochasticnoise.bsky.social · 17/09/2026These British podcast hosts are talking about a Supreme Court ruling that juveniles can’t get life without parole. They keep bringing up horrific crimes committed by kids, asking what we should do with them-and it’s just so clear they have no clue about what a 25 year term in a US prison looks like. 030
Occam’s Razor Burn @stochasticnoise.bsky.social · 12/09/2026I hate Yankees fans so much. Correction, I hate white Yankees fans from Fairfield county Connecticut. The rest of them act pretty normal. At first, I thought it was baseball fans. Then I narrowed it to Yankees fans, then I realized, hate is a big word and the problematic subset is pretty small. 020
Occam’s Razor Burn @stochasticnoise.bsky.social · 06/08/2026I posted this to the company pet board. 375 people have seen it and he only has 42 likes. This is an outrage. 140
Occam’s Razor Burn @stochasticnoise.bsky.social · 05/08/2026I really want Joe Biden to release a line of house slippers, with a special ‘Dr. Jill’ collection, for the ladies. 120
Occam’s Razor Burn @stochasticnoise.bsky.social · 27/07/2026I’ve been replacing my wardrobe. It’s been expensive. There has been an element of buying stuff I end up not wearing and buying more. I feel terrible about the money. Now I need a nice coat for work, and I feel guilty. It’s even on sale because I’m buying in summer. I can afford it. What the hell. 031
Occam’s Razor Burn @stochasticnoise.bsky.social · 19/07/2026Fresh juices are such a waste of resources. But also the 16oz Mermaid Fuel from Playa is technically my religion now. 010
Reposted by Occam’s Razor Burnjamelle @jamellebouie.net · 19/07/2026the mcgriddle is a miracle of modern technology 1172485139
Occam’s Razor Burn @stochasticnoise.bsky.social · 17/07/2026It’s Friday! What’s everyone doing? I’m listening to podcasts while eating French bread pizzas and drinking virgin dirty shirleys. 350
Occam’s Razor Burn @stochasticnoise.bsky.social · 28/04/2026Sure, a good morning text is great, but has he ever brought you a 12 pack of Mountain Dew Baja Blast Zero completely unprompted? 3130
Occam’s Razor Burn @stochasticnoise.bsky.social · 11/04/2026While it told me that it couldn’t figure out the shoes, it witheringly corrected me that in Low, it was T Pain that handles the hook. Flo-Rida only does the verses. This what ai is for. Behold the future. 010
Occam’s Razor Burn @stochasticnoise.bsky.social · 09/04/2026I just found out Woody Allen isn’t dead. What the hell. 250
Occam’s Razor Burn @stochasticnoise.bsky.social · 16/03/2026My bjj gym needs a mat enforcer Signed, the smallest person there who gets treated like her ability to operate at any level at any point in the roll is an affront to god and man In other news, I may have had my other ACL blown out by an egocentric brown belt 481
Occam’s Razor Burn @stochasticnoise.bsky.social · 14/03/2026Bro, you ghosted me three years ago. Unless the is your 12 step apology or you’ve found your lord and savior, don’t text me. 130
Occam’s Razor Burn @stochasticnoise.bsky.social · 21/02/2026A dude on tinder just said I was cool because he likes tough girls and that’s an immediate block. 000
Occam’s Razor Burn @stochasticnoise.bsky.social · 18/02/2026I went blonde, got back on tinder, and chose violence So that’s happening 040
Occam’s Razor Burn @stochasticnoise.bsky.social · 15/02/2026Y’all- am I about to go buy boots? Full disclosure there is a new Boot Barn location and I also have a broken toe. 020
Occam’s Razor Burn @stochasticnoise.bsky.social · 15/02/2026It is Valentine’s Day. The rites must be observed and the Old Gods appeased. 020
Occam’s Razor Burn @stochasticnoise.bsky.social · 14/02/2026There is nothing, and I do mean nothing, like a book that speaks to you. I can’t tell you what I would pay for a drug that could replicate the feeling, but I know it can’t be done. And I’m not sure whether I’m sad or grateful for that. 140
Occam’s Razor Burn @stochasticnoise.bsky.social · 09/02/2026My old drafts folder was a true carnival of horrors. 250
Occam’s Razor Burn @stochasticnoise.bsky.social · 09/02/2026It’s 10pm on Sunday- you hit the wrong thing on Spotify, and a song you run to on repeat comes on. It hits your nervous system hard. You finally talk yourself down from finding the nearest treadmill immediately. But you still can’t sleep because Hello Bitches is stuck in your head. 000
Occam’s Razor Burn @stochasticnoise.bsky.social · 01/02/2026My friend: you have such a great way of contextualizing so many things in a few short sentences. Me: Bitch, that voice note was four minutes long. 060
Occam’s Razor Burn @stochasticnoise.bsky.social · 31/01/2026Do I just pick a direction and drive 400 miles? I think I need to. Not sure why. Time will tell. Time and 400 miles. 161
Occam’s Razor Burn @stochasticnoise.bsky.social · 27/01/2026All this time, and distance, and growth only to find out that I really was a holla back girl this whole time. 070
Occam’s Razor Burn @stochasticnoise.bsky.social · 13/01/2026I’m on this allergy diet with mainly unprocessed and minimally processed foods and I’m sitting here with my bag of original Lays from the micro mart, trying to explain why I can have potato chips and not a protein bar. 030
Occam’s Razor Burn @stochasticnoise.bsky.social · 30/12/2025The squirrels in doggie heaven are AI. 000
Occam’s Razor Burn @stochasticnoise.bsky.social · 30/12/2025Over Christmas, somebody ambushes me in the kitchen and asks if I know the sequel to Van Wilder- Van Wilder 2: the Rise of Taj. I brace myself for the worst, but then proceeds to suggest a new Oppenheimer film- Oppenheimer 2: the Rise of Teller. I was simply not prepared for that interaction. 041
Occam’s Razor Burn @stochasticnoise.bsky.social · 30/12/2025Welcome back to Muay Thai- it’s gonna be 3-6 weeks before I have legs that don’t look like this. These are only 9 hours old. 240
Occam’s Razor Burn @stochasticnoise.bsky.social · 28/12/2025Not for nothing, but any strategy that makes survival significantly harder for civilians has a civilian body count. 130
Occam’s Razor Burn @stochasticnoise.bsky.social · 27/12/2025How I’m walking out of 2025media.tenor.coma woman is standing in front of a white car that is on fire .ALT: a woman is standing in front of a white car that is on fire . 130
Occam’s Razor Burn @stochasticnoise.bsky.social · 27/12/2025My gym cancelled classes over a measly 5” of snow. Where do we think we are, Dallas? Dammit I was really counting on that dopamine. 140
Occam’s Razor Burn @stochasticnoise.bsky.social · 26/12/2025Okay, it is snowing like nobody’s business out there. I have Thai curry soup and jasmine rice. Snuffy and I are on the couch listening to podcasts. The heat works now (y’all it is 68 degrees in here). It’s so very nice. I also did some defensive parking and I won’t have to dig out tomorrow. 040
Occam’s Razor Burn @stochasticnoise.bsky.social · 26/12/2025These questions are meaningless. Speak up, speak plainly and concisely, hush when your point is made if debate is not useful or called for. Just like every murderer thinks somebody needed killing-everyone who ever said anything thought somebody needed to say it. 030
Occam’s Razor Burn @stochasticnoise.bsky.social · 26/12/2025Not to brag or nothing, but it’s 17 degrees out, and I finally fixed my heat. The temperature in my living room has gone from 55 to 68 over the last 90 minutes. 270
Occam’s Razor Burn @stochasticnoise.bsky.social · 26/12/2025A rhyme of these two ideas is super common- nearly always goes like this: Some people are good people, but bad things happened to them and they shouldn’t have to live through this kind of pain. But some people are just bad people who are being selfish and they should suck it up because that’s life 000
Occam’s Razor Burn @stochasticnoise.bsky.social · 25/12/2025Today is the magical day where Instagram suddenly transforms to wall to wall coverage of dogs opening presents 150
Occam’s Razor Burn @stochasticnoise.bsky.social · 23/12/2025In case you needed to see a cat in a beret 1124243
Occam’s Razor Burn @stochasticnoise.bsky.social · 23/12/2025That’s true for all niche genres- the actors don’t get to be in on the joke. But if Michael Caine can menace a frog and Mark Hamill can cut off his dad’s hand with camera parts, anything is possible. 160
Occam’s Razor Burn @stochasticnoise.bsky.social · 23/12/2025I just saw some guy on a cat diabetes forum tell a woman who didn’t know the chemistry of fat metabolism that she needed to take organic chemistry- but to do the 101-level class, inorganic chemistry, first. I’m trying so hard not to weigh in just so I can hoist a reply guy by his own petard. 130
Occam’s Razor Burn @stochasticnoise.bsky.social · 19/12/2025Today has been an exercise in malicious compliance and I love that for me. 130
Occam’s Razor Burn @stochasticnoise.bsky.social · 18/12/2025I am in a public space, and I’m intently posting here to avoid a visual encounter with a douchebag. 140
