iiinova — where your digital self keeps evolving

Southern Trains UK @southerntrains.bsky.social · 19/09/2025

Delighted to report that finally, #finally I got an STD! 😁 Yes! I got some! Yay.

Reposted by Southern Trains UK

Barack Obama @barackobama.bsky.social · 18/09/2025

After years of complaining about cancel culture, the current administration has taken it to a new and dangerous level by routinely threatening regulatory action against media companies unless they muzzle or fire reporters and commentators it doesn’t like.

yahoo.com

Let’s be clear about what happened to Jimmy Kimmel

Trump’s most brazen attack on free speech yet.

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Southern Trains UK @southerntrains.bsky.social · 19/09/2025

Just to file it correctly, do you think I should register it as antisemitism or antizionism?! And to the smartarses that are inevitably going to jump in here, no, I am not registering it as Antinazi!!

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Reposted by Southern Trains UK

Dr Jo Edge 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁷󠁬󠁳󠁿 @hagenilda.bsky.social · 02/08/2025

Cw: antisemitism Hey @southerntrains.bsky.social antisemitic graffiti on the 6.46 Ford to Brighton service.

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Reposted by Southern Trains UK

Equiton Press @equiton.net · 17/09/2025

To err is human... to F*** things up completely takes @southerntrains.bsky.social What a day.... *bleh*

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Southern Trains UK @southerntrains.bsky.social · 19/09/2025

We don’t normally repost political stuff, but I woke up this morning feeling funky, so there! Reposting. Glad you found a train!

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Southern Trains UK @southerntrains.bsky.social · 23/06/2025

Love seeing our own proprietary signature f**k-the-customer service techniques being so elegantly and precisely copied by Enterprise, National and Alamo car rental at Gatwick. Heart-warning stuff!

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Southern Trains UK @southerntrains.bsky.social · 21/06/2025

Hi everyone. Can you help please? This definitely looks like a positive comment… but I haven’t seen one before, so wanted to verify?

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Southern Trains UK @southerntrains.bsky.social · 02/06/2025

Fair point. In fact sir, you stroke me as someone inflicted with logic and reason. I am so sorry - life must be hard!

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Southern Trains UK @southerntrains.bsky.social · 02/06/2025

Maybe, but what about the exercise?! Do I ever get any thanks about the exercise? Do I f#$% !

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Southern Trains UK @southerntrains.bsky.social · 02/06/2025

Madam, for you, happy to make available access to the driver’s compartment! (If you don’t mind sitting on their lap for the journey of course!)

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Southern Trains UK @southerntrains.bsky.social · 24/05/2025

I know we say “if something doesn’t look right contact a member of staff”, but could passengers please stop getting in touch every time a train turns up on time?! Thank you!

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Southern Trains UK @southerntrains.bsky.social · 19/05/2025

As I go through the stations again (after all this time), I see our localised/secondary station experiments yielding results and being extended/implemented in major ones like #Hove. #IfYouDontTellThemYouAreActuallyClosingTheirTicketOfficesTheyWillNotComplain

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Southern Trains UK @southerntrains.bsky.social · 19/05/2025

I am totally having the ‘I have arrived b*tches’ feeling when we do this!! :)

Gatwick airport platform six. Electronic sign above showing the Littlehampton train has arrived, but the platform is entirely train free - not a freaking wagon on sight.

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Southern Trains UK @southerntrains.bsky.social · 07/05/2025

Our stats are trustworthy and directly linked to reporting on the signs of our stations. In a related topic, have I mentioned how awesomely improved our timings are?!

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Southern Trains UK @southerntrains.bsky.social · 07/04/2025

Apt, clean, timely, eloquent, meaningful. All words that due to company policy, I don’t understand. But all seem fitting for this lovely poem. Enjoy

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Southern Trains UK @southerntrains.bsky.social · 22/03/2025

Loving the Trump. Anyone who even thinks of complaining about terrible self-serving malevolent train management, I just label them ‘Leftist” and all is good in my world!

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Southern Trains UK @southerntrains.bsky.social · 22/03/2025

I don’t know why all these people are angry. I find that professionally hating passengers 9 to 5 leaves me calm and in control the rest of the day. I love my job.

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Southern Trains UK @southerntrains.bsky.social · 08/03/2025

Can passengers kindly stop skeeting me that ‘they are inside me’… thank you!

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Southern Trains UK @southerntrains.bsky.social · 07/03/2025

Twitter cunningly renamed itself X, implying they will be a super app. I am considering renaming us ‘Y the hell’ matching the exclamations from most our wannabe passengers, attempting to go somewhere…

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Southern Trains UK @southerntrains.bsky.social · 06/03/2025

Dear USA Government, Our management would like to publicly salute you! Thanks to you, nobody is going to be using US as an example of being unable to run a bath, let alone an organisation… Such a pleasant change…

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Southern Trains UK @southerntrains.bsky.social · 04/03/2025

I don’t mean to brag, but we despised people before it was cool to hate everybody…

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Southern Trains UK @southerntrains.bsky.social · 01/03/2025

Not a lot of people know this, but we have spent a fortune developing our onboard toilet doors. They are now JUSt capable of closing and locking when someone is in, but impossible to keep shut when there isn’t. This way the traditional southern odour is shared with all! It’s the details… #Branding

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Southern Trains UK @southerntrains.bsky.social · 28/02/2025

So many passengers to torture, so little time!

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Southern Trains UK @southerntrains.bsky.social · 27/02/2025

Yeah, we have a similar problem here in the UK with trains and foxes that cross the train lines. Also with leaves on the rails… But at least we are fairly confident neither is feeling smug when causing these delays…

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Southern Trains UK @southerntrains.bsky.social · 27/02/2025

Will run trains for sexual favours…

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Southern Trains UK @southerntrains.bsky.social · 27/02/2025

To our genius complainers, when you block, your responses disappear. Just saying…

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Southern Trains UK @southerntrains.bsky.social · 27/02/2025

Just wanting to sincerely thank @shakerpainter.bsky.social for letting me produce my first customer service ‘butterfly’ on this platform.

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Southern Trains UK @southerntrains.bsky.social · 27/02/2025

I normally respond to such complaints explaining that we have finally found the best way to stop passengers taking the piss! In your case however ‘shaker’, I want to also raise the topic of the constant battle of cleaning the mess in men’s toilets!

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Southern Trains UK @southerntrains.bsky.social · 26/02/2025

What?! WHAAATT?! What is the opposite of the Green Party? Is there like an anti-green petroleum smoking capitalist child labour party? Vote for them instead!! ‘Cheaper fares’!!!! Do you kiss your mother with that mouth?!

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Southern Trains UK @southerntrains.bsky.social · 22/02/2025

Being #ProTrains rights. (Our busses have been identifying as trains for a long time now)

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Reposted by Southern Trains UK

Graham Muz @grahammuz.bsky.social · 16/02/2025

One of my local tree rats pushing his boundaries... @lswr-swc.bsky.social

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Southern Trains UK @southerntrains.bsky.social · 10/02/2025

We would like to remind wannabe passengers that our aircon units were build in Italy, and therefore only have two settings: Off, and Arctic Blast.

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Southern Trains UK @southerntrains.bsky.social · 10/02/2025

Seriously now. Has anyone seen any of our trains recently?

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Southern Trains UK @southerntrains.bsky.social · 05/02/2025

Nobody asks the serious existential questions anymore! Like, is it worth going to London? Do I really need to be there? How badly do I want this? That is the kind of thing that a friend helps you think about. The kind of thing that WE help you think about…

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Southern Trains UK @southerntrains.bsky.social · 05/02/2025

To anyone wanting to go to London Victoria today or tomorrow: Muaaaahahahahaaahaa!

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Southern Trains UK @southerntrains.bsky.social · 31/01/2025

To all ‘alternative means of transport’… #JustSaying

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Southern Trains UK @southerntrains.bsky.social · 24/01/2025

Had a moment today… Just stood up in the middle of the office and announced to the entire floor, at the top of my voice, that sexual harassment will not be tolerated!! Oh how we laughed…

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Southern Trains UK @southerntrains.bsky.social · 10/12/2024

For the love of God, can passengers stop reporting on-time trains as ‘something that doesn’t look right’?!

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Southern Trains UK @southerntrains.bsky.social · 24/11/2024

This government… On the one hand they do sh*t like tax small companies to oblivion like it is nothing, which is properly #scary! On the other, they have started to ask questions like “where has all the passenger money gone” which is #terrifying! I am not enjoying this…

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Southern Trains UK @southerntrains.bsky.social · 19/11/2024

Inspired by this amazing tweet, we now also offer “care” tokens to all our passengers! Basically you submit your complaint about our ‘service’, and then you look at your token and you imagine we care! Love it! 💙

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Southern Trains UK @southerntrains.bsky.social · 18/11/2024

Going to bed. If anyone complains about lack of customer service/no trains/rude staff/locked toilets/no transport police/delays/unruly passengers etc whilst I am away, please express total surprise, say this never normally happens, and explain that I am super busy with an emergency? Merci!

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Southern Trains UK @southerntrains.bsky.social · 16/11/2024

Berwick Station, East Sussex. In a new, brilliant pilot scheme, we are trialling returning rarely used strips of land (space between and around commuter zone rail lines) to nature! Bees, small animals, and even crops could be thriving here soon! #BrilliantPlan #SouthernTrains #Rewinding #WeRock

Image of abandoned train station with wild plants growing where once there were train lines

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Southern Trains UK @southerntrains.bsky.social · 16/11/2024

Right. Just spent like two hours unfollowing everyone at X. Need nourishment... Enjoy the rest of Saturday nice people!

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