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SimpsonsQOTD @simpsonsqotd.bsky.social · 21h

"Oh, I don't know about this dog. He's kind of... snooty." "Homer, are you wearing a tie to impress Laddie?" "Do you think he noticed?"

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SimpsonsQOTD @simpsonsqotd.bsky.social · 29/09/2026

"Behold! The power plant of the future... today!" "Too cold and sterile. Where's the heart?" "But it really generates power. It's lighting this room right now." "You lose. Get off my property."

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SimpsonsQOTD @simpsonsqotd.bsky.social · 28/09/2026

"Look, that kid's got bosoms! Who's got a wet towel? Come here, you butterball." "Don't make me run! I'm full of chocolate."

Season 6 / Episode 8
Sorry about the pixelated image. Either this or be censored by moderation.

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SimpsonsQOTD @simpsonsqotd.bsky.social · 25/09/2026

"Why don't you come chat with us about the Leader at the welcome center?" "Will there be beer?" "Beer is not allowed." "Homer no function beer well without."

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SimpsonsQOTD @simpsonsqotd.bsky.social · 24/09/2026

"Good lord! Homer, do you have an explanation for this bill?" "Oh, it's that record club. The first nine were only a penny. Then they jacked up the price. It's not fair. It's not fair, I tells you."

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SimpsonsQOTD @simpsonsqotd.bsky.social · 23/09/2026

"Hey, hey! Sabu! Uh, I need another magnum of your best champagne here, eh? And bring us the finest food you got stuffed with the second finest." "Excellent, sir... Lobster stuffed with tacos."

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SimpsonsQOTD @simpsonsqotd.bsky.social · 22/09/2026

"Homer Simpson! You stand accused of eating half the population of the Planet of the Doughnuts." "As Homer's defense attorney, I feel we should be merci-- Hey! Did you just take a bite out of me?" "Um, maybe."

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SimpsonsQOTD @simpsonsqotd.bsky.social · 20/09/2026

"My Homer is not a Communist. He may be a liar, a pig, an idiot, a Communist, but he is not a porn star!"

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SimpsonsQOTD @simpsonsqotd.bsky.social · 19/09/2026

♪ Sugar, do-do-do-do do-do ♪ ♪ Aw, honey, honey do-do-do-do do-do ♪

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SimpsonsQOTD @simpsonsqotd.bsky.social · 18/09/2026

"Hey, Homer, the section you're supposed to be monitoring is on fire." "Clowns are funny."

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SimpsonsQOTD @simpsonsqotd.bsky.social · 17/09/2026

"In a sample taken in this very classroom, a state inspector found 1.74 parts per million of asbestos!" "That's not enough. We demand more asbestos. More asbestos! More asbestos! More asbestos! More asbestos!"

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SimpsonsQOTD @simpsonsqotd.bsky.social · 16/09/2026

"I suggest you leave immediately." "Or what? You'll release the dogs or the bees, or dogs with bees in their mouth, and when they bark, they shoot bees at you? Well, go ahead. Do your worst."

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SimpsonsQOTD @simpsonsqotd.bsky.social · 15/09/2026

"Ooh! Look at me. I'm making people happy. I'm the magical man from Happy Land In a gumdrop house on Lollipop Lane. Oh, by the way, I was being sarcastic."

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SimpsonsQOTD @simpsonsqotd.bsky.social · 14/09/2026

"Say, Barn... uh, remember when I said I'd have to send away to NASA to calculate your bar tab?" "Oh, yeah. We all had a good laugh, Moe." "The results came back today. You owe me $70 billion." "Hmm?" "No, wait, wait wait, that's for the Voyager spacecraft. Um, your tab's $14 billion."

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SimpsonsQOTD @simpsonsqotd.bsky.social · 12/09/2026

"There's no way to see into the Simpson home without some kind of infrared heat-sensitive camera. Now, this technology is new to me, but I'm pretty sure that's Homer Simpson in the oven rotating slowly. His body temperature has risen to over 400 degrees. He's literally stewing in his own juices."

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SimpsonsQOTD @simpsonsqotd.bsky.social · 11/09/2026

"Hey. Marge, I can't feel my legs. I can't feel my legs!" "Homer! Homer, those legs belong to the man behind you." "Hi."

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SimpsonsQOTD @simpsonsqotd.bsky.social · 09/09/2026

"Marge, it's 3:00 A.M. Shouldn't you be baking?"

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SimpsonsQOTD @simpsonsqotd.bsky.social · 08/09/2026

"Now this is the most important man on the tour. He's in charge of quality control." "Fine. Fine. Mouse. Fine. Mouse. Rat. Fine. Syringe. Fine. Nose. Fine." "Let me just say, you're doing a great job, Phil." "Hey, thanks a lot. That makes it all worthwhile."

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SimpsonsQOTD @simpsonsqotd.bsky.social · 07/09/2026

*...dental plan. Lisa needs braces. ...dental plan. Lisa needs braces.* "Bull's-eye!" "Thanks a lot, Carl. Now I've lost my train of thought."

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SimpsonsQOTD @simpsonsqotd.bsky.social · 06/09/2026

"Oh... English side ruined. Must use French instructions. 'Le grille'? What the hell is that?"

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SimpsonsQOTD @simpsonsqotd.bsky.social · 05/09/2026

"♪Two all-beef patties, special sauce, lettuce, cheese ♪ ♪ Pickles, onions on a sesame seed bun ♪ Oh..." "Homer, you're drooling on the mike again."

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SimpsonsQOTD @simpsonsqotd.bsky.social · 04/09/2026

"Thank God it's Friday." "Hello? Hello?"

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SimpsonsQOTD @simpsonsqotd.bsky.social · 03/09/2026

"Excuse me. Are you Drew Barrymore?" "What? Get out of here. I'm hung over." "Sorry, Miss Barrymore." "What?"

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SimpsonsQOTD @simpsonsqotd.bsky.social · 02/09/2026

"We are insured, aren't we, Mom?" "Homer, tell your child what you bought when I sent you to town to get some insurance." "Curse you, magic beans!"

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SimpsonsQOTD @simpsonsqotd.bsky.social · 01/09/2026

"Hey, Dad, that light says 'check engine'." "Uh-oh. Tape must have fallen off. There. Problem solved."

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SimpsonsQOTD @simpsonsqotd.bsky.social · 01/09/2026

"It must be the first of the month. New billboard day! 'This year, give her English muffins.' Whatever you say, Mr. Billboard. 'Best in the West.' That rhymes. Clown college? You can't eat that."

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SimpsonsQOTD @simpsonsqotd.bsky.social · 31/08/2026

"Welcome to Lee Carvallo's Putting Challenge. I am Carvallo. Now, choose a club. You have chosen a three wood. May I suggest a putter? Three wood. Now, enter the force of your swing. I suggest feather touch. You have entered "power drive." Now, push 7-8-7 to swing. Ball is in parking lot."

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SimpsonsQOTD @simpsonsqotd.bsky.social · 30/08/2026

"Moe, what do you recommend for severe depression?" "Booze, booze and more booze."

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SimpsonsQOTD @simpsonsqotd.bsky.social · 27/08/2026

"Smithers, I'm home." "What? Already?" "Yes."

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SimpsonsQOTD @simpsonsqotd.bsky.social · 26/08/2026

"Well, you kids are old enough to know the truth, and I'm not gonna sugarcoat it. So, the tiny aorta fairies will take Mr. Leg Vein on a long trip to get married to Princess Left Ventricle." "Dad, are you trying to tell us you're getting a coronary artery bypass graft?" "Uh, yeah."

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SimpsonsQOTD @simpsonsqotd.bsky.social · 25/08/2026

"Tomorrow, on Rock Bottom... He's a foreigner who takes perverted videos of you when you least suspect it. He's Rowdy Roddy Peeper."

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SimpsonsQOTD @simpsonsqotd.bsky.social · 24/08/2026

♪ I work hard for the money ♪ ♪ So hard for the money ♪ ♪ Oh, I something, something money ♪ ♪ Come on give me lots of honey ♪ "Now, there's an employee, Smithers. A smile on his lips and a song in his heart. Promote him."

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SimpsonsQOTD @simpsonsqotd.bsky.social · 23/08/2026

"Foolish dingo, you must find and devour the seven crystal babies, or spend eternity trapped in deep didgeri-doo!"

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SimpsonsQOTD @simpsonsqotd.bsky.social · 22/08/2026

♪ Nacho, nacho man ♪ ♪ I want to be a nacho man ♪

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SimpsonsQOTD @simpsonsqotd.bsky.social · 20/08/2026

"The plant called and said if you don't come in tomorrow, don't bother coming in Monday." "Woo-hoo! A four-day weekend!"

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SimpsonsQOTD @simpsonsqotd.bsky.social · 19/08/2026

"[...]Our six-term mayor, the illiterate, tax-cheating, wife-swapping, pot-smoking spendocrat Diamond Joe Quimby." "Hey, I am no longer illiterate."

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SimpsonsQOTD @simpsonsqotd.bsky.social · 18/08/2026

"So I said, 'I must get out of these wet clothes and into a dry martini.'"

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SimpsonsQOTD @simpsonsqotd.bsky.social · 17/08/2026

"Uh, this isn't going to be about Jesus, is it?" "All things are about Jesus, Homer. Except this. Your son has been working in a burlesque house. Principal Skinner saw him with his own eyes." "That's true, but I was only in there to get directions on how to get away from there."

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SimpsonsQOTD @simpsonsqotd.bsky.social · 14/08/2026

"This is my year, Marge. Everyone knows I'm what makes this city great!" "I don't know. There's a lot of buzz around Lenny."

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