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Simon

@simonwe1ss.bsky.social
190 followers 73 following 3.3K posts

professionally not a moron // The Arsenal

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Simon @simonwe1ss.bsky.social · 04/10/2026
Amount of shit goals we concede is not sustainable
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Simon @simonwe1ss.bsky.social · 04/10/2026
If you give Shaw that much uncontested central space and possession you will concede goals, I guess. Same as for goal #1
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Simon @simonwe1ss.bsky.social · 04/10/2026
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Simon @simonwe1ss.bsky.social · 04/10/2026
The team would quickly get out of this slump, if Slegers stopped wearing club merch to games
static.klipy.com
Family Guy: Peter Griffin - I Have Spoken!
ALT: Family Guy: Peter Griffin - I Have Spoken!
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Simon @simonwe1ss.bsky.social · 03/10/2026
Me, whenever I check the back 4 after hearing Gyökeres did well
static.klipy.com
Mr. Bean's Bedtime Story with Teddy
ALT: Mr. Bean's Bedtime Story with Teddy
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Simon @simonwe1ss.bsky.social · 02/10/2026
I love international breaks I love how everyone always comes back healthy
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Simon @simonwe1ss.bsky.social · 01/10/2026
What an illustrious list xD
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Simon @simonwe1ss.bsky.social · 30/09/2026
When chasing a game, defensive subs. When 2-0 up Make it make sense
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Simon @simonwe1ss.bsky.social · 29/09/2026
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Simon @simonwe1ss.bsky.social · 29/09/2026
Wenger right now
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Simon @simonwe1ss.bsky.social · 29/09/2026
Can't believe everyone is still playing maptap when whentaken has always been the real place to be 🤓😅
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Simon @simonwe1ss.bsky.social · 28/09/2026
These things could be gone from the game tomorrow if they were regularly treated as the red card offences they were. More likely the victim sees red for reacting though.
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Simon @simonwe1ss.bsky.social · 27/09/2026
Seen enough Bring back Nagelsmann Tzolis assist though (at least spiritually)
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Simon @simonwe1ss.bsky.social · 27/09/2026
There's nothing there There's no-thing there What is there there
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Simon @simonwe1ss.bsky.social · 27/09/2026
Seems whoever is in charge of the pitch at Stamford Bridge is also on international break. That pitch is looking *slooooow*
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Simon @simonwe1ss.bsky.social · 25/09/2026
12 point deduction for Everton.
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Simon @simonwe1ss.bsky.social · 24/09/2026
Timber needs to have a strong word with his brother
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Simon @simonwe1ss.bsky.social · 23/09/2026
Since every club switches merch every 6 weeks, it was pretty obvious Adidas would do one more 'goodbye' kit for Germany - just a bit surprised a) it's meh like this and b) doesn't even play with any past design or at least the German kit history Entirely unremarkable shirt
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Simon @simonwe1ss.bsky.social · 22/09/2026
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Simon @simonwe1ss.bsky.social · 22/09/2026
#AgainstShiteShotSelection 1 goal from the last 63 shots (3 games) at 0.09 xG / shot.
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Simon @simonwe1ss.bsky.social · 22/09/2026
cc: @rschlegs
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Simon @simonwe1ss.bsky.social · 22/09/2026
The Pope in 1503:
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Simon @simonwe1ss.bsky.social · 20/09/2026
If i were the chancellor of Germany and my party were to post 5% in a state election, I would probably consider a holiday - preferably one for 5-7 years
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Simon @simonwe1ss.bsky.social · 20/09/2026
Over the in the WSL, Crystal Palace have conceded 72 shots in the last 2 games. Didn't concede for the first 30 (v Arsenal), conceded 7 for the other 42 (v Spurs, admittedly while down to 10 all game). Just great.
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Simon @simonwe1ss.bsky.social · 20/09/2026
Would love to see a stat on how much time in possession was spent facing our own goal. Can probably pick a random moment in the game and catch someone facing that way.
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Simon @simonwe1ss.bsky.social · 19/09/2026
At least stopped United from winning, but this is such an anaemic, unconvincing side. Can only play at one tempo and is pretty much solely reliant on hero-ball moments Not quite Jonas level bad, but getting there.
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Simon @simonwe1ss.bsky.social · 19/09/2026
Pass pass pass Hope Smith or Baum do a magic Repeat
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Simon @simonwe1ss.bsky.social · 19/09/2026
Overall not that fussed by the result or the performance (in fact prefer a single collective 'accident'). Main concern would be the lack of problem solving throughout the game. Okay, they are good and posing you problems - what are you going to do about it?
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Simon @simonwe1ss.bsky.social · 19/09/2026
Good movement, terrific ball in, nobody arsed to attack it
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Simon @simonwe1ss.bsky.social · 19/09/2026
Very very fitting
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Simon @simonwe1ss.bsky.social · 19/09/2026
Kind of run and pass you should be doing way more against a side pressing like this
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Simon @simonwe1ss.bsky.social · 19/09/2026
Their relentless nature reminds me of the peak Klopp Liverpool sides that were completely pumped full of caffeine.
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Simon @simonwe1ss.bsky.social · 19/09/2026
Havertz shouldn't be giving away the ball there - primarily as he shouldn't be in that position in the first place
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Simon @simonwe1ss.bsky.social · 19/09/2026
Thanks for Sunderland away, but it's time to bring on Zubimendi
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Simon @simonwe1ss.bsky.social · 19/09/2026
Not been great, far from it, but also not really conceded much of note - yet you are 2-0 down Many other games you go into HT 0-0 and can reset for the 2nd The 2nd one is so weird structurally, no clue why so many were chasing that attacking transition only for us to run into a counter-counter
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Simon @simonwe1ss.bsky.social · 19/09/2026
Been a while since we've felt so ill-prepped for a game
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Simon @simonwe1ss.bsky.social · 19/09/2026
Spurs finally score a goal. Kudos.
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Simon @simonwe1ss.bsky.social · 19/09/2026
cc @RDZerbs
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Simon @simonwe1ss.bsky.social · 18/09/2026
Chelsea
static.klipy.com
Marie Kondo: This One Sparks Joy
ALT: Marie Kondo: This One Sparks Joy
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Simon @simonwe1ss.bsky.social · 17/09/2026
For his first games, Klopp has called up 44 players in 2 squads
static.klipy.com
Utter Woke Nonsense
ALT: Utter Woke Nonsense
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Simon @simonwe1ss.bsky.social · 16/09/2026
A/B test The test arm is Yamal who - having just turned 19 - is already on 12000+ senior minutes
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Simon @simonwe1ss.bsky.social · 15/09/2026
+ Noni + Wowman - Eze - Gyökeres o Merino
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Simon @simonwe1ss.bsky.social · 15/09/2026
5-1 Akpom
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Simon @simonwe1ss.bsky.social · 15/09/2026
Only two more goals and we'd have as many goals as Gyökeres has had touches. Wahey
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Simon @simonwe1ss.bsky.social · 15/09/2026
Noni Madueke would rather score a goal than pass it to Gyökeres - and we know how much he dislikes scoring
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Simon @simonwe1ss.bsky.social · 15/09/2026
MAXIMUM WOWMAN
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Simon @simonwe1ss.bsky.social · 15/09/2026
Arse.com lying *again* and getting my hopes up 😡
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Simon @simonwe1ss.bsky.social · 14/09/2026
You can make it simpler, but you can also hire people that are prepared to withstand the stress. Just like in any other job VAR ref is actually a great opportunity to hire 'outside the system' as traditional ref skills aren't as needed. Hire air traffic controllers and teach them the rules.
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Simon @simonwe1ss.bsky.social · 13/09/2026
Use your eyes ffs As if he's just smashed this down the middle haha
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Simon @simonwe1ss.bsky.social · 13/09/2026
Michael Oliver in defensive contribution territory for some fantasy points Excellent display
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