iiinova — where your digital self keeps evolving

I'm gonna take a few days off the internet, I am so happy to see so many survivors sharing and so many people speaking out. If you are a survivor take extra care of yourself right now. <3 <3 We're gonna get these fucks.

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shanley @shanley.com · 52m

So, if the criminal justice system is not going to help you, *I AM NOT SAYING THIS IS A PERFECT SOLUTION, RIGHT OR FEASIBLE FOR EVERYONE*, but i think one of the important things to achieve agency is to have options; and civil suits *can* be that.

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shanley @shanley.com · 53m

He's gonna die in prison. And I am so very excited for that. One thing I learned from this is that justice does matter. Because of going through this and working with the murder victim's family and the detectives on the case (one of whom never let it go for 20 years as well), I'm in a new healing.

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shanley @shanley.com · 55m

Finally, although the murder case of course changed the course of my case, I had never been truly convinced that any form of justice for this, any justice against my abuser, could really change how I felt. But it did, it really really has, and I will get to go to his trial and see him in chains.

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shanley @shanley.com · 56m

I am a huge fan of private investigators after this case. The private investigator was able to answer a number of questions for me and my attorneys. Hiring that person (I never even knew his name), is some of the best money I have ever spent, and I like Bora Bora.

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shanley @shanley.com · 59m

So, I was willing to go public and go to the ends of the earth to ruin him. It took me around 20 years from the abuse to take these steps. So, know that the path for me and other survivors can be extremely long, but the need for justice does not end until it is served.

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shanley @shanley.com · 1h

The goal was for a settlement; I was prepared to expose him, tell everyone in his family, his workplace, all of his friends, his apartment building, put it all over the internet, and engage every effort to seek justice. A demand letter was not an idle threat in the least.

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shanley @shanley.com · 1h

We were planning to seek an amount of money that would have made a huge difference in most women and girl's life, and an amount that would make a serious difference in his life, which was my main priority. I think financial restitution is very important.

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shanley @shanley.com · 1h

Our goal was to get a settlement that acknowledged the abuse and trauma and also exacted something monetarily penalizing based on our assessment of his finances. It was not an amount of money that would have made much of a difference to me, but, I am in a position of serious financial privilege;

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shanley @shanley.com · 1h

For me personally, having therapists I could rely on as part of this process made a huge difference and I knew I had someone strong in my corner who had been through everything with me.

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shanley @shanley.com · 1h

The process included documenting my story so it could be served along with the demand letter. This was pretty stressful as it required going over it with the attorneys. We also enlisted a trauma therapist I had seen extensively who could provide notes and testimony and she prepared that for us.

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shanley @shanley.com · 1h

This is ONLY my personal experience and thoughts. I hired one of the country's best attorneys in sexual violence with a particular focus on CSA victims, this was important to me to work with a firm that specialized in this.

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shanley @shanley.com · 1h

So, I never got to go through the whole process, but wanted to share what i know about the prep and the process in case you are curious or this is an avenue you might want to pursue for yourself or other survivors in your life.

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shanley @shanley.com · 1h

I prepared to file a civil suit in 2020 and pursued it over a few years. When we were getting ready to serve him, we couldn't find him, hired a private investigator, found my abuser was the subject of an international manhunt over a murder 1 cold case committed the month after I turned 18.

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shanley @shanley.com · 1h

I think one important aspect of Jane Doe case that is important is the role civil lawsuits can play for abuse survivors. The criminal justice system sucks and frankly so does the whole legal system -- still, this is an option that might be available to some of you or girls/women you know.

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shanley @shanley.com · 3h

There is a rage and a violence in women because of what they did to us and I want to see it.

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shanley @shanley.com · 3h

God i fucking hate them GOD i hate them

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shanley @shanley.com · 3h

I'm always to two minds and I always feel like I'm sitting out of some of the things that matter most to me. But the fight against tech fascism is about girls and women too. But I want to be out there hunting pedophiles.

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shanley @shanley.com · 3h

I want to work in anti-pedophilia shit so bad and I spent so much of my early work focusing on girls and women, its where my heart lies to such an extent but I can be more valuable to the fight against tech fascism. But if I could run it all again, I would do anti-pedophilia work full time.

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shanley @shanley.com · 3h

When this stuff comes up I feel like my heart is being ripped out because I started doing work on tech fascism so many years ago specifically from a feminist lens and specifically from an anti-sexual violence lens, and I wish I was two people, or at least a person with more energy and skill.

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shanley @shanley.com · 3h

I try to imagine what life would be without pedophilia, rape and domestic violence. And I can't really come up with anything cuz man, they fucking killed me. But I hope I get to see it someday.

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shanley @shanley.com · 3h

I went to an event yesterday that was cute but there was a man there who looked VERY similar in the face to Peter Thiel and i kept staring at him lmfaoo

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shanley @shanley.com · 3h

We must always fight for children and young people. Always. 10 toes down.

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shanley @shanley.com · 3h

you have no credibility in the conversation at this point. if you want to say dumb shit, say it ON YOUR PAGE where i don't have to see it, not in my fucking mentions

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shanley @shanley.com · 3h

Then wtf is your problem NEVER lecture me about men EVER

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shanley @shanley.com · 3h

"BuuuTT WhAU ABouT He ONNNTologicaALLLL Condemmmation" fuck out of here

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shanley @shanley.com · 3h

sorry the broad condemnation of men affects your delicate sensibilities so maybe leave this to the people with a stomach for it.

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shanley @shanley.com · 3h

this ain't go nothign to do with "ontological", this is literal empirical reality of what happens to girls and women in society, not fucking metaphysics, and expecting that men should have access to children while 25% of them are getting sexually absued is PSYCHO

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shanley @shanley.com · 3h

do not fucking start with me yo

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shanley @shanley.com · 4h

So yeah. Schools with men in them? HELL NO. DAYCARES with men left alone with children? NEVERRRRRRR. Churches? Don't get me started about the fucking catholics. Drastic steps need to be taken such as proactively hunting pedophiles and not waiting til they get through 40 kids.

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shanley @shanley.com · 4h

Look around at all the stories victims are sharing and realize that as overwhelming as it is, and i KNOW people get sick of hearing about it, but it is a FRACTION of the total amount that you see. Pedophiles ruining the lives of 25% of girls before they have a chance to live at all.

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shanley @shanley.com · 4h

I literally cannot look at a child or teen girl without just absolute dread and horror coming over me. See a group of high school girls? I'm running statistics in my head because at least one of them has been or soon will be attacked. ONE IN FOUR GIRLS EXPERIENCES CHILD SEXUAL ABUSE BEFORE 18

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shanley @shanley.com · 4h

It's a full no from me. When you see what pedophilia does to a child, you will NEVER have the same outlook on society and people again. While probably society would not want to go as far as I would, clearly, much more drastic steps need to be taken.

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shanley @shanley.com · 4h

(this is one reason i would never have kids lol because i would spend all my time trying to protect them from pedophiles). Personally I find it very hard to walk past a school and see a man is supervising a bunch of children by himself. NAHHHH

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shanley @shanley.com · 4h

Schools are not safe. Pedophiles absolutely flock there. Pedophiles use social media often as their primary grooming strategy. Let your child stay over at a house where there's a man there? NEVERRRRRRR

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shanley @shanley.com · 4h

Just knowing what i and other pedophile victims have gone through, i would NEVER let a child be alone in a classroom or daycare with a man, EVER, i would never let a child be around a stranger, I would never let a child have a phone with any social media. And trust me, these are reasonable steps.

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shanley @shanley.com · 4h

I'll tell you, and this might seem draconian, but when you look at the cost to girls of being attacked by pedophiles and have experienced that, you come to some conclusions.

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shanley @shanley.com · 4h

It is so sad but girls need to know in a clear way what is out there and will try to rape and kill them. When you are young, it is hard to know, and men are so protected that girls aren't told the "nature" of man.

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shanley @shanley.com · 4h

I hate that it always happens at this cost but I also know that its something that victims want to happen, is for other girls to be warned and understand what they are dealing with out there, and hopefully, hopefully hopefully to develop better systems among us to keep girls safe and help them.

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shanley @shanley.com · 20h

How much time of my time I spend thinking about Open AI and Anthropic: 0.5%

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shanley @shanley.com · 20h

Trying our hearts out and everything.

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shanley @shanley.com · 20h

Nothing has gotten better, the rapes, the sexual assaults, pedophilia, domestic violence, nothing has gotten better. this whole time.

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shanley @shanley.com · 20h

That is the infuriating part of this. Like nothing is changing, men are not conceding to even basic reforms.

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shanley @shanley.com · 20h

Things have gotten literally 0 better for women in my entire lifespan so far.

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shanley @shanley.com · 23h

Bring back meritocracy.

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shanley @shanley.com · 23h

Level playing field where everyone had to be honest? There would be no fucking question.

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shanley @shanley.com · 23h

The only way these idiots and frauds can get one over on me is through fucking disgusting dishonest games and bullshit. Tactics I have never needed to resort to because I know my shit up and down and sideways. The ONLY way to beat me is this underhanded, cowardly, tabloid journalism psycho shit.

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shanley @shanley.com · 23h

Let's level the playing field, huh, cuz it really isn't fair, the odds are stacked against them. So I will go on with absolutely no prep, after taking two shots, with no notes. STILL beat your fucking ass halfway around the world.

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shanley @shanley.com · 23h

People you could fully smoke in debate get away with this rat-like, verminy wormy bullshit and its infuriating. Put the citation cartel aside and the conspiracy of incompetence, I would completely dominate these people in an honest setting. And they know it too.

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shanley @shanley.com · 23h

That's why they fight you through passive aggressiveness, character smears, social media and citation cartels, erasure, and manipulation of their followers with incomplete and distorted narratives missing the only vital evidences.

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