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Alan Aldred

@scarletspider85.bsky.social

721 followers 5.4K following 531 posts

UK ADHDer, Nerd, QA Tester, Video Game Addict & Serial Punster. He/him. :) linktr.ee/scarletspider85

Posts Replies Media

Alan Aldred @scarletspider85.bsky.social · 26/06/2026

Credit to @danaintq.bsky.social, as stolen from their Threads post: @jongraywb.blacksky.app! Hey, @jongraywb.bsky.social! Say the line!

A doughnut filled with canned clam chowder, because we have strayed from God's light.

Alan Aldred @scarletspider85.bsky.social · 11/05/2026

@jongraywb.blacksky.app Psst. @jongraywb.blacksky.app! Say the line!

Unspeakable horror. No really, you don't want to know.

Alan Aldred @scarletspider85.bsky.social · 01/05/2026

I'm convinced that, if Erika Kirk and Kash Patel ever had kids, their eyes would like like one of these:

Player mugshot from the original 'Quake', whose eyes are baggy and bloodshot.

Player mugshot from the original 'Quake', whose eyes are the only part of the face visible after the player has activated an invisibility power-up.

Alan Aldred @scarletspider85.bsky.social · 19/04/2026

Cursed breakfast cereal: "Cinnamon Bean Crunch"

Alan Aldred @scarletspider85.bsky.social · 20/03/2026

From Threads, credit to @katebullockwrites.bsky.social - screenshotting here as this genius hasn't posted this banger here on Bluesky (yet?). I had the urge to go make a coffee so I had something to spit out:

Threads screenshot from @katebullockwrites: "I'm fucking delighted that I'm at the sex club and we're hosting a Mario kart tournament and eveyone is here for it. It's epic."

Alan Aldred @scarletspider85.bsky.social · 13/01/2026

@jongraywb.bsky.social, @misscammiedawn.bsky.social

55alegria: "I saw someone once say that if you take "the" from the names of Sonic Characters you get Metal Gear character names and if you do the opposite with Metal Gear characters you get Sonic character names. Examples: Sonic Hedgehog and Solid the Snake".

Alan Aldred @scarletspider85.bsky.social · 26/12/2025

Disgusted Colonel Sanders, sat aghast at a desk, asks (in text 'snipped' from numerous images like an old ransom note): "WHAT IN THE HOT CRISPY KENTUCKY FRIED FUCK"

Alan Aldred @scarletspider85.bsky.social · 01/12/2025

@jongraywb.bsky.social's legacy continues to inspire crimes against God. #YallComeEat

Poached eggs, but the yolks are replaced with peanut butter and jelly (or jam here in the UK). Caption reads "babe are you ok? you've barely touched your PB&Jeggs"

Alan Aldred @scarletspider85.bsky.social · 19/11/2025

@jongraywb.bsky.social

Moana vs. Woana (Moana, but like Wario complete with 'stache)

Alan Aldred @scarletspider85.bsky.social · 16/11/2025

Some of the rascally Canadians taking umbrage with poor Gail - yes they are totally Canadian, why would someone on the Internet lie about such a thing:

Hugh Jackman

Crocodile Dundee

Chris Hemsworth

Tom Taylor

Alan Aldred @scarletspider85.bsky.social · 01/11/2025

@jongraywb.bsky.social

Photographers from someone's porch, original artist unknown: A pumpkin recreation of a chestbuster death from the Alien franchise, complete with pumpkin guts erupted across the floor.

Alan Aldred @scarletspider85.bsky.social · 13/10/2025

@jongraywb.bsky.social

The "designed with gamers in mind vs. designed with activists in mind" but it's AoStH Robotnik showing off cake vs. sad looking Sonic 1-era Robotnik with no cake to show off

Alan Aldred @scarletspider85.bsky.social · 13/10/2025

The "designed with gamers in mind vs designed with activists in mind", but it's AoStH Dr. Robotnik (with rear-end cake view) vs sad looking Sonic 1-era Dr. Robotnik

Alan Aldred @scarletspider85.bsky.social · 07/10/2025

'The Undertaker behind you' meme, but it's "Leader of the Green Party" lurking behind an unsuspecting "Alex, eating his greens"

Alan Aldred @scarletspider85.bsky.social · 29/09/2025

Smithers reassuring Mr. Burns in the audience: "No, they're buing..."

Alan Aldred @scarletspider85.bsky.social · 31/08/2025

Frog clasping front feet in 'steepling fingers' pose, captioned "*concerned silence*"

Alan Aldred @scarletspider85.bsky.social · 24/08/2025

Sign reads: "0 days since I've been embarrassed by other white people"

Alan Aldred @scarletspider85.bsky.social · 19/08/2025

Morning @jongraywb.bsky.social!

Edited cartoon of Donald Duck marching towards a wall, brandishing a manual drill, saying "You want glory? I'll show you glory!"

Comment by dominawritesthings" There are two many levels to this jokes and I wanted awareness of neither of them"

Comment by systlin: "I hate this so you all be to suffer with me"

Alan Aldred @scarletspider85.bsky.social · 10/08/2025

A WH40K Dreadnought made of gingerbread. Caption reads "Ho ho ho Heretics. Gingerbreadnought has returned"

Alan Aldred @scarletspider85.bsky.social · 10/08/2025

Images of the pygmy hippo Moo-Deng, immersed in flames, chomping on some poor dude's Wellington-covered foot. Caption reads "Khorne cares not from whre the blood flows"

Alan Aldred @scarletspider85.bsky.social · 31/07/2025

@jongraywb.bsky.social, is this your handiwork?

Silver Surfer heralding Galactus(-sized Grimace from McDonalds)

Alan Aldred @scarletspider85.bsky.social · 05/07/2025

@jongraywb.bsky.social, another one for you:

A jar labelled "EGGO: A brunch in a jar. Waffles and syrup, cream liqueur. Appalachian sipping cream. 20% ABV, 40 proof."

Alan Aldred @scarletspider85.bsky.social · 05/06/2025

I saw this, and now @jongraywb.bsky.social has to:

Webcomic by last_place_comics: Dr. No is interrogating James Bond with a mind reader device, only to be horrified by Bond's secret fantasy of getting Sonic the Hedgehog pregnant. I had to write this sentence before 7am, damn you.

Alan Aldred @scarletspider85.bsky.social · 03/05/2025

🎵 IT'S TIME TO PLAY THE MUSIC, IT'S TIME TO LIGHT THE LIGHTS🎵

Julie Andrews from The Sound of Music, singing and playing guitar to children in the countryside

Alan Aldred @scarletspider85.bsky.social · 30/04/2025

A series of panels from the comic 'Preacher', in which the protagonist Jessie Custer confronts and unmasks the KKK who, like most bigots, are small pathetic excuses for human beings.

"Why is it the greatest champions of the white race always turn out to be the worst examples of it...?" laments Custer before continuing to one particularly sorry specimen, "...YOU! WHERE THE FUCK JS YOUR CHIN?"

Alan Aldred @scarletspider85.bsky.social · 21/04/2025

The process of selecting a new pope.

Alan Aldred @scarletspider85.bsky.social · 09/03/2025

You. HEY YOU.

Kirby smiling and holding a sign reading "You're the Best".

Alan Aldred @scarletspider85.bsky.social · 08/02/2025

Time for the old classic:

Meme: "How I defeated fascism with the power of love.

Chapter 1: The Power of Love
The first step of my journey was realising that it is impossible to defeat fascism with the power of love.

Chapter 2: The Power of Incredible Violence"

Alan Aldred @scarletspider85.bsky.social · 06/02/2025

Social media poat by @quadcarl_carl: "They're eating the checks, they're eating the balances"

Alan Aldred @scarletspider85.bsky.social · 20/01/2025

GI Robot from Creature Commandos narrowing his eyes in disgust, as he wonders what the fuck is this Nazi bullshit.

Alan Aldred @scarletspider85.bsky.social · 11/01/2025

Without downloading any new pictures, what's your energy going into 2025?

Meme showing a sign with the text: “0 days since I’ve been embarrassed by other white people.”

Alan Aldred @scarletspider85.bsky.social · 04/12/2024

Game show meme:

Host: "Where you can get with that bullshit."
Contestant: "What is 'fuck outta here'"?
Host: "Correct!"

Alan Aldred @scarletspider85.bsky.social · 04/12/2024

@jongraywb.bsky.social Y'all Come Bake:

This image shows a humorous baking mistake where cookie dough was baked on the underside of a muffin tin, resulting in an unusual and amusing outcome. The cookies have spread out and formed a large, uneven mass around the inverted muffin cups, creating what the caption humorously refers to as "MuffOUTS."

Alan Aldred @scarletspider85.bsky.social · 03/12/2024

Hey Google, what's the opposite of a timeline cleanse?

A hand is holding a bottle labeled 'Doritos Milk' with 'Nacho Cheese' flavour.

Alan Aldred @scarletspider85.bsky.social · 10/11/2024

For my Trans friends and fellow Trans allies, I recently liked posts about the 4B movement but have just been told it's a TERF movement. I'm not on board with that, and no longer want to endorse or support it in any way. Thanks for your understanding.

A screenshot of a Wikipedia page about the '4B movement.'

Highlighted: "Members... oppose transgender rights movements". .

Alan Aldred @scarletspider85.bsky.social · 10/11/2024

Comic book panel featuring Captain America standing in front of an inferno of exploding vampires being shot with arrows.

Cap says:

"I've known good vampires. People who don't ask for this curse, who don't inflict their pain and hunger on others.

But I've never known a good Nazi."

Alan Aldred @scarletspider85.bsky.social · 09/11/2024

The image is a screenshot of a social media interaction. The first user, "femisodi," asks why American public transportation is as bad as that in their third-world country. The second user, "arrogantAuthor," responds with a metaphor, saying the USA is like "50 third world countries in a trenchcoat with a military budget big enough to fight god."

Alan Aldred @scarletspider85.bsky.social · 22/10/2024

Tweet from a parody McDonald's Twitter account. The post includes an apology for permanently closing a location in Feasterville-Trevose due to a man locking himself in and refusing to leave. He is described as eating French fries, drinking ketchup, claiming to be the president, and demanding to see Ronald’s schlong. The post concludes with the statement that they have no choice but to blow the place up.

Alan Aldred @scarletspider85.bsky.social · 21/10/2024

Hey @jongraywb.bsky.social, thirsty?

Alan Aldred @scarletspider85.bsky.social · 20/10/2024

Screenshot of a Twitter account deletion in progress by the Redact Android app. The interface shows the deletion progress with a rate of 0.50 messages per second and an estimated 12,577 deleted messages so far.

Alan Aldred @scarletspider85.bsky.social · 20/10/2024

Wacko from the cartoon series Animaniacs holding a mug in one hand and looking at a smartphone in the other, with a facial expression of despair bordering on disgust.

Alan Aldred @scarletspider85.bsky.social · 13/10/2024

Also, just saw this on the Effin Birds account and doubt it's a coincidence:

Alan Aldred @scarletspider85.bsky.social · 09/10/2024

My first overseas holiday in over 30 years led to someone getting evicted.

Alan Aldred @scarletspider85.bsky.social · 09/10/2024

It once took me several hours to realise someone had spent over a minute trying to set my scalp alight.

Alan Aldred @scarletspider85.bsky.social · 28/09/2024

Hey @jongraywb.bsky.social, is Y'all Come Eat still a thing?

An image showing a package of Oscar Mayer hot dogs with a unique “Halloween Black Licorice Flavored” label. The package is held in someone’s hand in a store, with price tags visible in the background. The hot dogs are made from chicken, pork, beef, and black licorice.

Alan Aldred @scarletspider85.bsky.social · 18/09/2024

I reckon @jongraywb.bsky.social has made this comment at some point:

Alan Aldred @scarletspider85.bsky.social · 08/07/2024

Picked up something I've been after for many years from Retro Gaming eBay using birthday money from the Mrs. Wow, this game is apparently so hardcore that even the installation screen is attacking me:

Alan Aldred @scarletspider85.bsky.social · 01/06/2024

Alan Aldred @scarletspider85.bsky.social · 24/04/2024

@jongraywb.bsky.social Found on FB:

Alan Aldred @scarletspider85.bsky.social · 24/03/2024

@jongraywb.bsky.social