iiinova — where your digital self keeps evolving

Sam Eifling @sameifling.bsky.social · 09/08/2026

dawg based on some real quick research I think it's comparable in size to maybe the most infamous horse statue in America ...

the three-story cerulean menace known as Blucifer stands astride Colorado's Eastern Plains. his lair, Denver International Airport, is visible in the distance

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Sam Eifling @sameifling.bsky.social · 03/08/2026

Shout-out to the crafty bastard in this 2010 h.s. yearbook who leveraged a cat pregnancy for a prom date

A yearbook page asks "How did you ask your date to prom?" A reply by a senior named Ben says, "I had a cat that was really pregnant and was going to have her kittens soon, so I wrote Emily Houck a note telling her if she went to prom with me I would give her one of the new kittens and that her mom already said it was okay."

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Sam Eifling @sameifling.bsky.social · 18/07/2026

RFK Jr.'s claim that Americans' diet makes us sick starting to feel like

a graphic from the Trump white house that reads "promises made promises kept"

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Sam Eifling @sameifling.bsky.social · 29/06/2026

same pose from the Japanese player who fumbled it in front of his own goal, allowing Brazil to steal the win in stoppage time

Japan's players stand distraught while Brazil's players celebrate a decisive goal

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Sam Eifling @sameifling.bsky.social · 28/06/2026

soccer is not the most exciting sport, imho, but it is absolutely the cruelest. to wit: find the person in this photo who accidentally headed the ball right to the striker, bouncing his country out of the world's premier sporting event until at least 2030

four canadian players run in celebration while five south african players stand in various shocked poses. the defender in the middle is bent over double, his face in his hands

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Sam Eifling @sameifling.bsky.social · 27/06/2026

congrats! my newspaper received a similar badge when our reporter sought comment on a story from the OMB

a terse email that reads: Please use this on the record from me: the Phoenix New Times is a communist rag that no one reads. it's signed by Rachel Cauley, communications director, the White House Office of Management and Budget

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Sam Eifling @sameifling.bsky.social · 27/06/2026

picked up a 2001 edition of Peter Shaffer's play Amadeus (on which the film was based) and found this anecdote in the introduction, by the director Peter Hall, that bottles fascists' relationship to art (reminiscent of the king's "too many notes" critique) CW: Margaret Thatcher

a page of a book, in which the author explains to Margaret Thatcher that the depiction of Mozart as a vulgar cad was accurate, based on the composer's own letters, and Thatcher insists he is wrong, based on her saying so

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Sam Eifling @sameifling.bsky.social · 16/06/2026

always baffles me how few Americans notice or visit Canada. it's not merely America's nephew. this was the scenery on my walk to grab coffee and a bagel in Montreal today ffs

A 300-year old statue of Amphrite sits before a long reflecting pool, beneath a soaring atrium

A white statue of a recumbent Amphrite, wife of Poseidon, reflects off dark water

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Sam Eifling @sameifling.bsky.social · 12/06/2026

buddy of mine, an otherwise smart guy, argues that Elon's ultimate mission is to prevent human extinction. people on Mars, all that bunk. but Earth is our planet. full stop. we're either here or we're *fully* fucked & no one has nor will ever side-quest their way into $1 million one million times

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Sam Eifling @sameifling.bsky.social · 07/06/2026

the Monopoly expansion packs are basically just the remaining career paths for the Class of 2026

two expansion packs for the board game monopoly, on a walmart shelf. the two variations on offer are called go to jail and buy everything

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Sam Eifling @sameifling.bsky.social · 27/05/2026

happy new AP style guide release day, to all who celebrate

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Sam Eifling @sameifling.bsky.social · 24/03/2026

Wow, turns out that a glorified militia standing around with their thumbs hooked under their vest straps like farmers relaxing on the porch of the five-and-dime don't actually accelerate 21st century mass-scale air transportation hubs, who could possibly have guessed

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Sam Eifling @sameifling.bsky.social · 13/03/2026

your local nautical-themed speakeasy's new spring cocktail menu just dropped (firm limit of two Bottom Mines per customer)

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Sam Eifling @sameifling.bsky.social · 12/03/2026

I used to think media jobs were mostly safe so long as AI lacks awareness but reading the front page of CNN today I'm realizing basic awareness is highly optional

a teaser for a video recorded by the US military of a plane being bombed and burned, under a headline that says 'US strikes Iranian aircraft'

a teaser for a news analysis that reads 'boom boom' US propaganda vs. the emerging Iran war reality

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Sam Eifling @sameifling.bsky.social · 13/02/2026

cannot recommend enough the ProPublica dive into Vought's background and governing priorities www.propublica.org/article/russ...

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Sam Eifling @sameifling.bsky.social · 27/08/2025

the federal success rate in securing grand jury indictments is north of 98% and they're now 0-2 in getting DC grand jurors to take these cases seriously

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Sam Eifling @sameifling.bsky.social · 06/08/2025

love to share a venomously droll @zhbuchanan.bsky.social hed. shout-out @phoenixnewtimes.com as always

a web headline reads: "women shouldn't hold office, says GOP woman now running for office"

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Sam Eifling @sameifling.bsky.social · 22/07/2025

loving the classic deadspin energy here

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Sam Eifling @sameifling.bsky.social · 26/06/2025

truly a modern masterpiece of giddyup

a clam, a pineapple, and a starfish rock out on a beach

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Sam Eifling @sameifling.bsky.social · 11/04/2025

I suspect Xi is chuffed to have a genuine advantage to press. So generous of the U.S. to offer him one.

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Sam Eifling @sameifling.bsky.social · 10/03/2025

guys he's not leading us into 1930s Germany or 1990s Russia. he's leading us into 2000s Atlantic City

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Sam Eifling @sameifling.bsky.social · 24/02/2025

one undeniable, always-reliable feature of conversations with MAGA supporters is incoherence. it may take 10 minutes, it may take 5, but they always wind up devolving into claims snatched at random from some mental junk drawer. Jim's letter today is a prime example.

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Sam Eifling @sameifling.bsky.social · 22/02/2025

I realize this is the name of an Arizona town and a fast-food chain but feign ignorance for a sec

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Sam Eifling @sameifling.bsky.social · 08/01/2025

how the Arizona Republic covered it / how we at @phoenixnewtimes.com covered it

a screenshot of an Arizona Republic headline reads: "Sen. Ruben Gallego and Mark Kelly back crime bill"

a screenshot of a Phoenix New Times headline that reads: "A GOP bill to fuck over undocumented people? Sign Ruben Gallego up!"

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Sam Eifling @sameifling.bsky.social · 04/01/2025

Wembanyama had 35-18-4 on 67% shooting and got the W over Denver but even more impressive he scored this bucket

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Sam Eifling @sameifling.bsky.social · 01/01/2025

Happy new year from northwest Arkansas, everyone

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Sam Eifling @sameifling.bsky.social · 29/12/2024

Garry Trudeau is doing more than just about anyone in America to make Sunday newspapers worth your $5

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Sam Eifling @sameifling.bsky.social · 04/12/2024

those three groups of three stripes also echo American Gothic's most prominent prop: the pitchfork the father holds, with its three vertical tines (which is echoed immediately again in the stitching pocket of his overalls)

detail showing the tines of the pitchfork, the green stripes of the man's shirt, and the pitchfork-like stitching on the front of his overalls

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Sam Eifling @sameifling.bsky.social · 04/12/2024

look at the father's shirt and you'll see the three vertical leaves of the snake plant echoed in two ways: once in the fact that his white shirt has these clusters of vertical stripes, three of which are visible behind his jacket; and again in that each cluster is itself three green stripes

detail of the man's chest, which shows three groups of three vertical green stripes against the white background of his shirt

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Sam Eifling @sameifling.bsky.social · 04/12/2024

it's not huge, but it's large enough that beguiling, maybe even subversive details become more evident: her regal broach, his gold button at the top of his weathered shirt. also: two healthy houseplants on the porch? I'd never noticed before. big ol' begonia and, plain as day, a potted snake plant

detail of a three-leafed snake plant (sansevieria) and a beefsteak begonia in pots on the porch of the house, visible over the daughter's right shoulder

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Sam Eifling @sameifling.bsky.social · 04/12/2024

yesterday I visited the Art Institute of Chicago, a Kendall Roy birthday mix of museums, just all bangers, all the time. I'd forgotten that maybe the most iconic American painting in existence was an apple's throw from Nighthawks, another contender. turn a corner and, wham, American Gothic:

this is the 1930 Grant Wood painting American Gothic, in which a blonde Midwestern woman and her father, bespectacled and holding a three-pronged pitchfork, fill the foreground in front of a white, two-story house and a red barn

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Sam Eifling @sameifling.bsky.social · 14/11/2024

can someone who watches more cable than I (i.e., nearly everyone, but specifically @bubbaprog.ilovecitr.us ...?) find any right-wing media messaging that would explain the current sugar spike in economic sentiment? did the narrative shift, or is this purely election afterglow?

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Sam Eifling @sameifling.bsky.social · 13/11/2024

pretending this is the pillow Guy you mean, for my sanity

it's our man guy fieri, printed on a throw pillow

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Sam Eifling @sameifling.bsky.social · 09/11/2024

this is doing numbers over on the other app rn. same vibes.

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Sam Eifling @sameifling.bsky.social · 28/09/2024

Mentally surviving by imagining myself among Chicago Bears fans

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Sam Eifling @sameifling.bsky.social · 16/09/2024

The idea that *anyone* can't afford Trump was definitively debunked by Spy in 1990

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