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Rumpelsilkskin

@rumplesilkskin.bsky.social
2.6K followers 2.7K following 137 posts

free range ✨ organic ✨ homegrown Web: www.homelandobscurity.com/publicati… IG: www.instagram.com/callhomelandobscu… Substack: open.substack.com/pub/localartthrob

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Rumpelsilkskin @rumplesilkskin.bsky.social · 24/09/2026
me as a medieval peasant getting my back broken over a wheel: “harder, further, yes”
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Rumpelsilkskin @rumplesilkskin.bsky.social · 10/09/2026
if a straight man can tell you his major 3 astrology placements trust he is more ran through than a tractor during harvest season
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Rumpelsilkskin @rumplesilkskin.bsky.social · 18/08/2026
“i would give you the moon if you wanted it” do i look like fucking Gru to you are you calling me fat
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Rumpelsilkskin @rumplesilkskin.bsky.social · 05/08/2026
anxiety is like experiencing one of those surprise fire drills except it’s your brain going “so here’s what we’re going to do if you have a gun pointed at you”
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Rumpelsilkskin @rumplesilkskin.bsky.social · 25/07/2026
when it comes to making a playlist nobody asked for yes i do see myself as an artist
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Rumpelsilkskin @rumplesilkskin.bsky.social · 11/07/2026
the best way to watch a movie? on someone else’s airplane screen through the seat cracks
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Rumpelsilkskin @rumplesilkskin.bsky.social · 08/05/2026
one time I was on a date and I heard my date mumble to himself while I was mid sentence “I can fix her”
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Rumpelsilkskin @rumplesilkskin.bsky.social · 17/04/2026
all that personal growth and development during my youth just to wake up at dawn and head to work still tired and very gassy
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Rumpelsilkskin @rumplesilkskin.bsky.social · 05/04/2026
idk i just feel like grown men getting strep throat means they’re a hoe
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Rumpelsilkskin @rumplesilkskin.bsky.social · 30/03/2026
wtf is it with white people just standing SO DAMN CLOSE TO YOU IN PUBLIIIICCCC
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Rumpelsilkskin @rumplesilkskin.bsky.social · 28/03/2026
being a woman with a big purse is a holy experience men will never understand I’m walking around with a day planner, sunscreen, 3 lip balms, 2 pairs of sunglasses, 4 scrunchies, gum, Advil, Tylenol, Tums, Lactaids, a 2lb chuck steak, and a travel visa application to Ghana
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Rumpelsilkskin @rumplesilkskin.bsky.social · 21/03/2026
truly amazing what a full nights rest followed by XL Wellbutrin followed by an espresso beverage can do
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Rumpelsilkskin @rumplesilkskin.bsky.social · 03/03/2026
i had a nightmare that i died and went to heaven but i still had to work and someone handed me my work laptop and told me to “figure it out there’s no Microsoft here” what do you think my psychiatrist will say about this one
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Rumpelsilkskin @rumplesilkskin.bsky.social · 29/01/2026
how severe are your daddy issues you ask? How many seconds of Daughters by John Mayer can you listen to without sprinting for the nearest freeway bridge? Can you make it to the end of the song without being forced into a padded room or strait jacket
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Rumpelsilkskin @rumplesilkskin.bsky.social · 26/01/2026
i mean, a lot of these political “moderates” are just like their parents and if I don’t like your mom I don’t like you im very Abby Lee Miller about it
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Rumpelsilkskin @rumplesilkskin.bsky.social · 10/12/2025
some of my best work tbh
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Rumpelsilkskin @rumplesilkskin.bsky.social · 02/12/2025
actually i take that back im bringing 2 kings Hawaiian sweet rolls and a loaded gun to use on myself because no way in hell am I waiting to die slowly and miserably the fuck
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Rumpelsilkskin @rumplesilkskin.bsky.social · 02/12/2025
im always genuinely insulted when I say that I hate someone/thing and someone responds with “hate is a strong word” because why tf do you underestimate my loathing
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Rumpelsilkskin @rumplesilkskin.bsky.social · 31/10/2025
we need financial compensation
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Rumpelsilkskin @rumplesilkskin.bsky.social · 25/10/2025
actually comprehended the lyrics of my fav cozy weather/fall song this year and realized it’s about heroin
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Rumpelsilkskin @rumplesilkskin.bsky.social · 16/10/2025
one time at work one of the weird tech bros was trying to explain to me how to get bugs off my computer so it wouldn’t be so slow and mid conversation he just descended into a flat split on the break room floor i did not ask him to do that and it was 6am.
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Rumpelsilkskin @rumplesilkskin.bsky.social · 11/10/2025
idk if we’re talking versions on versions of the same song/album we need to refer to Mariah Carey’s 25th anniversary re-release of Rainbow. That album had 3 versions of Heartbreaker and they all ate. We’re not reflecting on the ancient texts anymore
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Rumpelsilkskin @rumplesilkskin.bsky.social · 06/10/2025
i need these TikTok shop influencers to step it up. I just watched a video of a girl trying to sell me gummies saying “this gummy has more fiber than sugar”. Yes as does most everything else
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Rumpelsilkskin @rumplesilkskin.bsky.social · 04/10/2025
if i was Taylor Swift I wouldn’t be caught dead admitting that Marty Healy ghosted me…that man is racist af and looks like a victorian child with consumption
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Rumpelsilkskin @rumplesilkskin.bsky.social · 01/10/2025
open.substack.com
Edmonds Shoreline
a short collection of poems from coming of age on the Puget Sound.
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Rumpelsilkskin @rumplesilkskin.bsky.social · 29/09/2025
i still yearn for summer ‘16
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Rumpelsilkskin @rumplesilkskin.bsky.social · 18/09/2025
i need that free west African chiropractor treatment (a small child walks up and down my back)
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Rumpelsilkskin @rumplesilkskin.bsky.social · 01/09/2025
at least every week I think about when Trisha Paytas was fighting for her life online against racist allegations and used her love of rice as defense
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Rumpelsilkskin @rumplesilkskin.bsky.social · 19/08/2025
Gunna’s post prison glow up has me thinking maybe I should crash out to the maximum maybe it’ll actually be good for me to do time idk
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Rumpelsilkskin @rumplesilkskin.bsky.social · 11/08/2025
I’ve heard the same! I vote we get back in the lab and make something closer
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Rumpelsilkskin @rumplesilkskin.bsky.social · 11/08/2025
I don’t know nor do I care, make a simulation that stimulates the nerves they have in a similar way this should be the law 😩
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Rumpelsilkskin @rumplesilkskin.bsky.social · 11/08/2025
every man should have to experience a simulation of an IUD insertion before going near a woman ever
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Rumpelsilkskin @rumplesilkskin.bsky.social · 29/07/2025
the cult I was in would use this show as an example of what happens when you don’t center the prophets teachings in your life 🙂‍↕️
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Rumpelsilkskin @rumplesilkskin.bsky.social · 29/07/2025
black women make literally anything look effortlessly good i was just watching that episode of my strange addiction where our good sis was addicted to drinking air freshener and she made that fresh linen febreeze look so refreshing and tasty oml
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Rumpelsilkskin @rumplesilkskin.bsky.social · 19/07/2025
this ginger man entered himself in a conversation about comic books to talk about how much he hated Garfield so I asked if it’s bc they’re twins and he never spoke to me again. As a misandrist that was truly my one of greatest works of low effort with very high reward
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Rumpelsilkskin @rumplesilkskin.bsky.social · 09/07/2025
my morning routine always includes what I call Beverly Hills Mom Breakfast (green tea w/ lemon and an assortment of antidepressants and vitamins)
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Rumpelsilkskin @rumplesilkskin.bsky.social · 08/07/2025
the only benefit of working with white people is that my wig looks crazy today. a mess. I’m giving pleakly in disguise yet it’s compliments all around
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Rumpelsilkskin @rumplesilkskin.bsky.social · 05/07/2025
Dasani water tastes like how paper smells
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Rumpelsilkskin @rumplesilkskin.bsky.social · 30/06/2025
what? i don’t have a favorite ex i want them all to spontaneously combust
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Rumpelsilkskin @rumplesilkskin.bsky.social · 23/06/2025
i need y’all to put the grass powder DOWN i just saw someone using matcha powder to fry chicken. as if the lord doesn’t have a judgement day for us already.
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Rumpelsilkskin @rumplesilkskin.bsky.social · 23/06/2025
all these cowboy carter Paris clips got my feelings hurt fr
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Rumpelsilkskin @rumplesilkskin.bsky.social · 21/06/2025
like anna karenina
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Rumpelsilkskin @rumplesilkskin.bsky.social · 15/06/2025
all this political and social regression and still no quaaludes
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Rumpelsilkskin @rumplesilkskin.bsky.social · 15/06/2025
whenever my demons get loud I watch videos of ex convicts eating McDonald’s for the first time after years in prison and remind myself that’s it’s truly in my best interest to behave i really don’t want to go 10+ years without a mcchicken
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Rumpelsilkskin @rumplesilkskin.bsky.social · 02/06/2025
my passion is misandry
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Rumpelsilkskin @rumplesilkskin.bsky.social · 05/05/2025
the artists who create what we consume are more entangled than you would think
open.substack.com
Wait...They Wrote That?
how the architects of pop music shape generations on and off the stage
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Rumpelsilkskin @rumplesilkskin.bsky.social · 05/05/2025
when are we going to be honest and talk about how genuinely cvnty religous robes are the pope was always slaying
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Rumpelsilkskin @rumplesilkskin.bsky.social · 03/05/2025
Beyoncé is so pretty it makes me genuinely ill
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Rumpelsilkskin @rumplesilkskin.bsky.social · 20/04/2025
i was born in the late 90’s which means that if im stranded on an island and can only take three things with me im taking three kings hawaiian sweet rolls to eat them all at once and wait to die
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Reposted by Rumpelsilkskin
Trey @treydayway.bsky.social · 16/04/2025
Even my reality check bounced
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