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Ross Parsons

@rossparsons.bsky.social
301 followers 315 following 620 posts
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Ross Parsons @rossparsons.bsky.social · 3h
It should be 2 Keep Bee or Not 2 Bee Keep
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Ross Parsons @rossparsons.bsky.social · 13/10/2026
55 bucks for standing room seats was a bad idea.
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Ross Parsons @rossparsons.bsky.social · 13/10/2026
Silicon Valley AI bros can still love X the Everything App because they're already accustomed to ignoring negative effects on society if the keys are a-janglin.
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Ross Parsons @rossparsons.bsky.social · 12/10/2026
Right-wing comedy fans are pushing so hard to make Shane Gillis mainstream because it's certainly not gonna happen with any of the other Austin freaks.
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Ross Parsons @rossparsons.bsky.social · 12/10/2026
He's a tech journalist too so he probably just loves the relentless AI optimism
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Ross Parsons @rossparsons.bsky.social · 12/10/2026
Just such an oddball take. Every time I peak into x the everything app it's r-word city, AI pyschosis, and grown men getting furious about children's cartoon's.
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Ross Parsons @rossparsons.bsky.social · 11/10/2026
it's great because she just takes it as an opportunity to write an essay on the cultural impact of the Matrix films and studios refusing to leave squeezable IPs alone. I love how you can tell her contempt for the project by the color choices alone. The only real letdown for me was the action scenes.
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Ross Parsons @rossparsons.bsky.social · 11/10/2026
Absolutely love this movie for that reason. It's just "fuck building a cinematic universe and future plotlines, the story is over"
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Ross Parsons @rossparsons.bsky.social · 11/10/2026
Pronouncing it "La Francé" sounds like a Santino bit already
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Ross Parsons @rossparsons.bsky.social · 11/10/2026
Had to wait 20 minutes for the Hawks to come on because of these dipshits.
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Ross Parsons @rossparsons.bsky.social · 11/10/2026
To be clear it was before it could get to my stop. I think some guy held up a bodega and then he tried to escape the cops running onto the train. Knickerbocker M
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Ross Parsons @rossparsons.bsky.social · 11/10/2026
I was gonna go today but then a guy with a gun ran onto the train at the station before mine
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Ross Parsons @rossparsons.bsky.social · 09/10/2026
Ok, I just found out Sam Richardson won an Emmy but it was for Ted Lasso.
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Ross Parsons @rossparsons.bsky.social · 08/10/2026
Noted political expert, the guy who outspent Angie Nixon 12 to 1 and lost by 12 points
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Ross Parsons @rossparsons.bsky.social · 04/10/2026
Colleges are letting gang rapists off with apology essays and these people still want to relitigate woke
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Ross Parsons @rossparsons.bsky.social · 28/09/2026
Pac might be the most shocking wrestler death to me in a while. He was just trying to stop Andrade from taking his pants off two days ago!
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Ross Parsons @rossparsons.bsky.social · 27/09/2026
Dead Dove/Don’t Eat moment
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Ross Parsons @rossparsons.bsky.social · 26/09/2026
This stuff is for losers who can't even bother to post their own lip sync because they're too embarrassed by how their body moves
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Ross Parsons @rossparsons.bsky.social · 25/09/2026
The western Mass lesbian bar discourse is jut cat nip for people who still want to complain about people yelling at them on Twitter in 2016.
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Ross Parsons @rossparsons.bsky.social · 25/09/2026
If only Knock Off had been shot in IMAX
Posters for the Odyssey, Knock Off, Bullet in the Head, and Collateral
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Ross Parsons @rossparsons.bsky.social · 23/09/2026
The people who insisted "Twitter isn't real life" starting assuming that X was real life.
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Ross Parsons @rossparsons.bsky.social · 22/09/2026
The scene in the Odyssey where Circe changes the men into pigs is basically how AI psychosis looks.
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Ross Parsons @rossparsons.bsky.social · 22/09/2026
Type of guy you see using three types of dumbbells between bench sets
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Ross Parsons @rossparsons.bsky.social · 19/09/2026
When the train is going mad slow down the Williamsburg bridge into Delancey-Essex 😤
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Ross Parsons @rossparsons.bsky.social · 17/09/2026
The Office, but it's set in Robert Kraft's weird antisemitism command office in Gillette Stadium.
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Ross Parsons @rossparsons.bsky.social · 16/09/2026
Rob Schneider has stepped up to join the Ed Sheeran tour
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Ross Parsons @rossparsons.bsky.social · 15/09/2026
Oh is that why cops are so messed up?
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Ross Parsons @rossparsons.bsky.social · 14/09/2026
De-yassified Scott Adsit
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Ross Parsons @rossparsons.bsky.social · 11/09/2026
Imagine if Oscar Wilde had been born like a hundred years later and was like "Either these towers go or I do... ...oh dear"
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Ross Parsons @rossparsons.bsky.social · 11/09/2026
To be honest I would've preferred 9/11 and the Global War on Terror to not have happened at all but I can see how the warm fuzzies might be appealing.
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Ross Parsons @rossparsons.bsky.social · 09/09/2026
Oh brother this guy stinks Full disclosure: his production company once rejected a pitch of mine
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Ross Parsons @rossparsons.bsky.social · 07/09/2026
This is actually something Frasier did as the butt of the joke
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Ross Parsons @rossparsons.bsky.social · 06/09/2026
Guy at the minor league baseball game made a Slipnutz reference and my day has been made
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Ross Parsons @rossparsons.bsky.social · 05/09/2026
How did Shaggy rate a mention but not a headshot
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Ross Parsons @rossparsons.bsky.social · 04/09/2026
I miss when social media was for jokey jokes
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Ross Parsons @rossparsons.bsky.social · 30/08/2026
Boomers: Dismantled the social safety net and pulled the ladders up behind them. Millenials: Didn’t post about Olivia Rodrigo enough
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Ross Parsons @rossparsons.bsky.social · 30/08/2026
He did a voice in Doolittle too
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Ross Parsons @rossparsons.bsky.social · 28/08/2026
One of my favorite food trucks has an AI menu now and it's so disappointing. They make tremendous food and now they're advertising it with pictures that don't just fail to do it just but actively make it unappealing.
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Ross Parsons @rossparsons.bsky.social · 27/08/2026
The right doesn't police Joe Rogan either. Every week he'll say some random that contradicts party orthodoxy like how we should have universal healthcare or that Trump's blowing something and they let it slide because they know he's ultimately going to show up for the team.
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Ross Parsons @rossparsons.bsky.social · 26/08/2026
Silicon Valley hype these days feels like if Steve Jobs debuted a new iPhone that would give you cancer.
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Ross Parsons @rossparsons.bsky.social · 26/08/2026
please be nice to the technology we are developing. in the future it will do all sorts of wondrous things, like denying you healthcare
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Ross Parsons @rossparsons.bsky.social · 25/08/2026
Dolly Departing
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Ross Parsons @rossparsons.bsky.social · 25/08/2026
Whiskey Everdays with Chris Cuomo
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Ross Parsons @rossparsons.bsky.social · 25/08/2026
The Seth stuff never sat right with me because he publicly cried uncle and begged them to stop and they kept it going.
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Ross Parsons @rossparsons.bsky.social · 22/08/2026
July should be 60 days though
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Ross Parsons @rossparsons.bsky.social · 22/08/2026
The media has been so beaten into submission that they needed to be reminded that it's weird for the President to have a obsessive car trunk gremlin
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Ross Parsons @rossparsons.bsky.social · 22/08/2026
They will grimace through his act but they will love his lifestyle podcast about how you should do lots of drugs and only think about yourself
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Ross Parsons @rossparsons.bsky.social · 22/08/2026
He will move to Austin and a lot of right wing men who have never seen his act before will suddenly become big fans
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Ross Parsons @rossparsons.bsky.social · 21/08/2026
They fought for Clinton, Biden, and Harris. Of course centrists are gonna flock to the next people with hopeless dogshit messaging.
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Ross Parsons @rossparsons.bsky.social · 21/08/2026
Reggie Watts will become the American Russell Brand and do a lot of shitty right wing podcasts.
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