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Ron Sequitur ꙮ @ronsequitur.bsky.social · 05/10/2026

"I can tell Michael's mood by which comedy routine he chooses to do. The more infantile, the more upset he is. And he just skipped the Ace Ventura talking butt thing. He never skips it. This is bad." - Pam Beesly

Twitter post from New York Post

New York Post
@nypost

Abdul El-Sayed farts in public, ex aide says - and blasts Senate
candidate as immature 'manufactured man' trib.al/YtUdxZC

1:12 PM . Oct 4, 2026 . 976K Views

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Ron Sequitur ꙮ @ronsequitur.bsky.social · 17/09/2026

Does anyone even believe these lies anymore? Like, even the people in the cult have to be sort of side-eyeing each other now. Right?

Speaker Mike Johnson
House Republicans passed over 70 bills this week alone - that adds to our
total of over 900 bills passed through the House so far this Congress.

We've DELIVERED for Americans by:

Enacting the largest middle and working class tax cut in US history
Creating new incentives
Show more

@SpeakerJohnson . 11h

build-out of data centers or AI infrastructure

8:23

C.SPAN

Readers added context to this video

The 119th congress was the least productive in history, no congress has
enacted less legislation or laws. Johnson has cancelled a total 63
scheduled voting days in the house, granting members an extra 2
months PTO, with no house votes scheduled until after the election.

govtrack.us/congress/bills ...
ms.now/news/dhs-shutd ...
snopes.com/fact-check/mik ...
cbsnews.com/news/house-can ...

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Ron Sequitur ꙮ @ronsequitur.bsky.social · 04/09/2026

When people whine and cry about Medicare For All, and they say things like, "GOOD LUCK! You'll be waiting months to see a doctor! I have GOOD insurance from my JOB!!!" ... I want them to see this. This is what I get with excellent health insurance through my job. Who's fighting to keep this?

Exchange between a doctor's office and a patient, in which we see that even though the patient responded within 3 minutes of the doctor's office following up about a prescription for oxygen to treat cluster headaches, the doctor's office did not respond again for almost 3 months.

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Ron Sequitur ꙮ @ronsequitur.bsky.social · 04/09/2026

Throwing it back a few weeks. Buzzed my hair and shaved off the beard to perform in a play last week. Had a very fun time, but now it's over and I'm missing my hair.

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Ron Sequitur ꙮ @ronsequitur.bsky.social · 03/09/2026

Will he be riding in on a wingèd JFK Jr.? (psst. don't miss the alt text)

Picture of James Comer, looking like the motherfucking Grink himself, smirking like he just took a big boy bite of turds and mustard, wearing enough bronzer to win a hard bodies contest if all they judged was how gross you could make your face look, over a headline from The Hill that reads, "James Comer expects Sept. 14 Mitch McConnell return."

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Ron Sequitur ꙮ @ronsequitur.bsky.social · 26/08/2026

After six years of doctoral research, I am finally ready to share my findings.

Venn diagram: Left side says dog toys, right side says giant monkeys, middle says KONG

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Ron Sequitur ꙮ @ronsequitur.bsky.social · 22/08/2026

Gettin caught up on my ULINE reading today

Kombucha tasting meme with an industrial heat gun and a "yuck" reaction, then a Deluxe heat gun with a "not bad maybe?" Reaction. This is stupid and I don't care, eat your peas, Timmy.

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Ron Sequitur ꙮ @ronsequitur.bsky.social · 20/08/2026

Finally tried this new AI fad, really powerful stuff

Google search "Can you microwave granola bars and make oatmeal?"

AI Overview
No, you cannot turn a solid granola bar into a proper bowl of oatmeal by microwaving it. Granola bars contain binders like honey, sugar, or syrup, plus oils and toasted oats. Heating one with liquid will just result in a sticky, sweet, and messy sludge rather than smooth porridge.
What Happens When You Try
The binders melt: Sugars and fats liquefy and separate from the oats.
The texture fails: Instead of softening into creamy oatmeal, the oats stay somewhat chewy or tough while floating in a syrupy liquid.
The flavor over-concentrates: The added sugars and artificial flavors become overwhelmingly sweet and intense.

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Ron Sequitur ꙮ @ronsequitur.bsky.social · 14/08/2026

Hard to believe it, but less than 100 years ago, fascists were dealt with thusly. #History

On 29 April 1945, the bodies of Mussolini, Petacci, and the other executed fascists were loaded into a van and moved south to Milan. At 3:00 a.m., the corpses were dumped on the ground in the old Piazzale Loreto. The piazza had been renamed "Piazza Quindici Martiri" (Fifteen Martyrs' Square) in honour of fifteen Italian partisans recently executed there.[170]

After being kicked and spat upon, the bodies were hung upside down from the roof of a service station[171][172] and stoned from below by civilians. This was done both to discourage any fascists from continuing the fight and as an act of revenge for the hanging of partisans in the same place by Axis authorities. The corpse of the deposed leader was subjected to ridicule and abuse.

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Ron Sequitur ꙮ @ronsequitur.bsky.social · 06/08/2026

The US is the only developed country in the world with a for-profit health insurance industry. We link health insurance to employment, making people think their health depends on keeping their job. In fact, even those with health insurance can still owe BIG money if they become ill or need surgery.

Lego Patient and Doctor Meme

DOCTOR: You need surgery

PATIENT: Yikes okay

DOCTOR: Don't worry, we'll get it all set up and let you know when it will be.

DOCTOR: It won't cost you anything.

Lego Patient and Doctor Meme

DOCTOR: You need surgery

PATIENT: Yikes okay

DOCTOR: We'll notify a 3rd party processor who will notify your insurance company. They will notify a different 3rd party processor of their decision, and then we will get their decision back.

DOCTOR: All of this has to be done before we can schedule. It will take weeks, and it will inflate the cost of the procedure tenfold.

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Ron Sequitur ꙮ @ronsequitur.bsky.social · 03/08/2026

Apparently Aaron Rodgers hasn't figured it out yet, but when Aaron Rodgers comes to your defense, you're wrong.

Aaron Rodgers RIPPED Anthony Fauci:

"I'm gonna plead the 5th. Like that absolute coward Tony Fauci. Absolute coward. Are you kidding me? What are you scared of Tony? I thought you were science?"

“I TOLD YOU I’ll be on the right side of history.”

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Ron Sequitur ꙮ @ronsequitur.bsky.social · 02/08/2026

And another thing, if I had "put my dick in the ice cream," as the media is claiming, why would the dick-shaped indentations in the ice cream be so small? I habe the receipts for the ice cream, and a note from a medical doctor, which I will show you all, that confirms my penis is, in fact, NOT sm

A Congressperson who talks like someone would if they were lying about being an abuser

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Ron Sequitur ꙮ @ronsequitur.bsky.social · 01/08/2026

I can't be the only one who sees two chicken thighs that won't fit in the pan and thinks, "bread 'em with panko and get another pan warm."

Panko breaded chicken thigh pieces on a red plate with a ramekin of honey mustard

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Ron Sequitur ꙮ @ronsequitur.bsky.social · 31/07/2026

I... want you to know That I'm... hap-py for you

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Ron Sequitur ꙮ @ronsequitur.bsky.social · 27/07/2026

New avatar. Throwback to avi from the bird website.

An adult man with a crustache wearing what looks like a children's Batman costume. He is seen from the chest up. Image background has been replaced with solid color, sky blue. If this guy can't save us, nobody can.

I'm being told nobody can save us.

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Ron Sequitur ꙮ @ronsequitur.bsky.social · 27/07/2026

Barrett in July 2026: "I have been clear from the start: Only Congress has the authority to declare war or authorize military force." Barrett in March 2026: Thanks for your concern but the President won the election, so we just have to let him do whatever he wants. Elect @wewill2026.bsky.social !!

Email from Rep Tom Barrett dated July 25, 2026, in which he lies thusly:

Preventing Endless Wars
Christopher,

It’s been five months since the United States began military strikes on Iran. Since then, the conflict has only escalated and resulted in at least 18 heroic service members returning home in flag-draped caskets.

I have been clear from the start: Only Congress has the authority to declare war or authorize military force. That position hasn’t changed, which is why I voted this week — for the third time — to limit operations and wind down the conflict in Iran.

I remain ready to work with anyone to eliminate hostile threats to our nation without getting us into another endless war. In the meantime, learn more about my work on this issue:

Learn More

Official response I received 3/18/26, after I asked my representative to do his job and join the effort to impeach the president for his illegal attacks on Iran without Congressional approval. Rep. Barrett has not, in fact, been clear from the beginning about never-ending wars:

Dear Mr. ,

Thank you for contacting me regarding your thoughts about President Donald Trump. I appreciate you taking the time to share your opinions with me.

President Trump is the duly elected 47th President of the United States. While you and others in our country may not agree with his policies or leadership style, he was chosen by the majority of the American people through our constitutional process.

Regardless of who occupies the White House, my primary focus is on serving the people of Michigan’s 7th Congressional District. I take seriously my responsibility to fight for our local families, strengthen our economy, protect our freedoms, and ensure that mid-Michigan’s needs are never overlooked. This is why I am willing to work with anyone — Republican, Democrat, or Independent — to advance solutions that move our community and our nation forward.

During this increasingly polarized time in our nation’s history, it’s critical for us all to remember that there is so much more that unites us than divides us. The United States of America is stronger when we respect differing opinions, approach one another with civility, listen to and challenge ourselves with opposing ideas, and seek common ground whenever possible. Respectful dialogue, compromise, and collaboration are — and always will be — essential to the continued prosperity of our nation.

(etc.)

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Ron Sequitur ꙮ @ronsequitur.bsky.social · 27/07/2026

Guys, don't sign up for this and then no-show. That would be very disrespectful.

Text spam for President Fuckface and his Token Black Friend

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Ron Sequitur ꙮ @ronsequitur.bsky.social · 26/07/2026

Seeking hair help / advice! I have been growing my hair out. My hair grows super fast and is really thick. If I don't put something in it to give it weight, it's almost unmanageable, but that usually gives too much shine. Good hair products for this type of hair that won't make my hair look oily?

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Ron Sequitur ꙮ @ronsequitur.bsky.social · 24/07/2026

Jesus lost the rap battle but he was taking it ok

Jesus, or maybe Dave Grohl, saying start the rapture into a telephone

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Ron Sequitur ꙮ @ronsequitur.bsky.social · 24/07/2026

I don't know how this game is played but I think I'm doing my best

A man with a gorgeous head of hair and a neatly trimmed beard, wearing a blue button down shirt, upon which is clipped a small white card that reads, "Please do NOT touch!" In black letters. He is smiling a big, dumb, goofy smile that undermines the entire tone of the terse, written warning he wears upon his breast. To be fair, the binder clip already undercut any potential gravitas here. Who's thirsty?

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Ron Sequitur ꙮ @ronsequitur.bsky.social · 24/07/2026

shopping for a couch in the 70s was like, well, here it is, here's the couch, and you'd just have to decide if you wanted a couch or not

70s couch. Beige and plaid (both, somehow) with wood trim, I guess

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Ron Sequitur ꙮ @ronsequitur.bsky.social · 23/07/2026

EDITOR: Ok lettuce virus, who has headline ideas? [bunch of hands go up] EDITOR: ...that don't use the word iceberg. [hands go down] EDITOR: Ah f*ck it let's roll. [writers lose their freaking minds]

NBC News headline: lettuce may be tip of the iceberg as cyclosporiasis spreads

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Ron Sequitur ꙮ @ronsequitur.bsky.social · 23/07/2026

"I think I found it," said Frog. "Is this your c*ck ring, Toad?" Frog was aware this was not Toad's c*ck ring. Frog was mocking Toad by implying Toad had a very small penis.