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Robert Manchild

@robertmanchild.com

9.8K followers 1.1K following 2K posts

extremely online cpap enthusiast. 🏳️‍⚧️🧷 𝗟𝗮𝘁𝗲𝘀𝘁 tinyurl.com/mr2ekn4r 𝗚𝗿𝗲𝗮𝘁𝗲𝘀𝘁 tinyurl.com/3af9yp69 𝗠𝘆 𝗙𝗮𝘃𝗼𝗿𝗶𝘁𝗲𝘀 tinyurl.com/yde7dbew 𝗦𝘁𝗮𝗿𝘁𝗲𝗿 𝗣𝗮𝗰𝗸 tinyurl.com/yr4yusjh 🔗 robertmanchild.com

Posts Replies Media

Robert Manchild @robertmanchild.com · 09/09/2026

Looking out at the skunk who just disrespected my dog.

Sexy closeup of Nathan Fielder looking at Elizabeth Holmes

Robert Manchild @robertmanchild.com · 10/08/2026

Helaena Targaryen looking at the tapestry.

Screenshot of tweet from stefan heck aka @boring_as_heck

[mysterious old lady flips tarot card revealing a dude who looks exactly like me flying a hot air balloon into power lines]

Me: is that good

Robert Manchild @robertmanchild.com · 23/07/2026

If I send you this know that I’m trying to ruin the next 3 hours

Jessica Chastain (bless) twisted up like a pretzel in the Other Mommy trailer

Robert Manchild @robertmanchild.com · 21/06/2026

Robert Manchild @robertmanchild.com · 10/06/2026

These health apps are out of control

Screenshot of a couple of iPhone widgets. One shows a sleep score from the Health app. The score is 69. Under the number it reads Sleep Score and then NICE (the sex number!).

Robert Manchild @robertmanchild.com · 13/04/2026

For All Mankind, Season 5 (2026)

Carmine Laguzio from I Think You Should Leave

Robert Manchild @robertmanchild.com · 04/04/2026

This and some ginger ale 🤌

Robert Manchild @robertmanchild.com · 24/03/2026

Screenshot of article from The Onion with the headline New Starbucks Opens In Rest Room Of Existing Starbucks

Robert Manchild @robertmanchild.com · 20/03/2026

If I send you this I’ve had enough for today.

Ogilvie from The Pitt crashing out.

Robert Manchild @robertmanchild.com · 26/02/2026

🏳️‍⚧️

Bella the Pitt-mix in her trans pride collar

Robert Manchild @robertmanchild.com · 20/02/2026

NATIONAL WEATHER SERVICE: Hey, New Jersey! Here’s another winter storm warning! 🙌❄️☃️ ME:

Ilia Malinin reacts (sadly) after competing on day seven of the Milan Cortina 2026 Winter Olympic games at Milano Ice Skating Arena on Friday, February 13.

Robert Manchild @robertmanchild.com · 20/02/2026

The best possible outcome is that it happens moments after conviction.

Norman Rockwell’s painting called Freedom of Speech.

Robert Manchild @robertmanchild.com · 19/01/2026

wth man

Man vs giant meme. The man is labeled “3 day weekend” and the giant is labeled “Spend it shoveling snow”.

Robert Manchild @robertmanchild.com · 03/01/2026

Wesley Snipes as Nino Brown from New Jack City pointing a gun at his best friend Gee Money and crying.

Robert Manchild @robertmanchild.com · 31/12/2025

Max Dugan will return in Avengers Doomsday.

Jason Robards from the film Max Dugan Returns.

Robert Manchild @robertmanchild.com · 26/12/2025

It’s coming.

William Shatner in the Twilight Zone episode Nightmare at 20,000 Feet. He has his eyes closed in fear because of a monster out the window on the wing. Shatner is labeled “Let’s circle back after the holidays” and the monster is labeled “January 2nd”.

Robert Manchild @robertmanchild.com · 25/12/2025

She is not amused.

Bella the pitbull mix, in a pile of wrapping paper looking off into the distance.

Bella the pitbull mix, in a pile of wrapping paper, looking directly into the camera as if to say “what the fuck, man?”.

Robert Manchild @robertmanchild.com · 17/12/2025

Gnome Blood

A gnome-shaped bottle of red food coloring

Robert Manchild @robertmanchild.com · 12/12/2025

Apple had the chance to do the funniest thing and they blew it.

Screen shot of Apple sleep score. The score is 69 - next to the score is the word “OK”.

Robert Manchild @robertmanchild.com · 10/12/2025

This is how we’re doing performance reviews from now on. Tag yourself.

Post-it note with 4 quadrant matrix.

Top - SLAYING
Bottom - TAKING THE L
Left - CRASHING OUT
Right - LOCKED IN

Quadrants:
Top / Right - Go off, King/Queen
Top / Left - Running on vibes
Bottom / Right - Grinding, but down bad
Bottom / Left - It’s giving burnout

Robert Manchild @robertmanchild.com · 08/12/2025

all due respect, but the last thing I want for Xmas is a Chris Hansen cameo

Cameo ad featuring To Catch a Predator’s Chris Hansen

Robert Manchild @robertmanchild.com · 03/12/2025

Here’s my Spotify Wrapped. Go Birds. Fuck Ice.

Screenshot of email that starts with “You've canceled your Spotify subscription.”

Robert Manchild @robertmanchild.com · 17/11/2025

Facebook Marketplace, you good?

“Vintage” gynecological table for sale on Facebook Marketplace.

Robert Manchild @robertmanchild.com · 27/10/2025

[robot noises intensify]

Old man in a black Trans Lives Matter t-shirt. The classic Transformers font is used. Created by @bornmiserable.bsky.social

Robert Manchild @robertmanchild.com · 17/10/2025

Collect them all.

Screenshot of the official while house Bluesky account which was automatically blocked by a moderation list the user follows.

Screenshot of the official homeland security Bluesky account which was automatically blocked by a moderation list the user follows.

Robert Manchild @robertmanchild.com · 09/10/2025

Is it the 25th Amendment? It’s the 25th Amendment, isn’t it?

An ad featuring an illustration of two bare legs from from the knee down. The calves and feet are swollen. The right leg in the foreground is bright red. The ad copy reads “How To Drain
Lymph Fluid In Ankles & Legs? It's Simple
(Watch Now)”.

Robert Manchild @robertmanchild.com · 24/09/2025

If I send you this know that I am plotting. Scheming even.

The eye-sheep creature from Alien: Earth

Robert Manchild @robertmanchild.com · 08/09/2025

My inner dialog any time I use the leaf blower.

Homer angrily muttering to the TV ‘Cate Blanchett never raked a yard in her life’. The actual quote is ‘The man never drank a Duff in his life’ regarding Richard Nixon.

Robert Manchild @robertmanchild.com · 06/09/2025

Screenshot of a brown Tamagotchi-type bear looking really angry. The word upset is over his head. There are charts that track both protein and water. They are both blank.

Robert Manchild @robertmanchild.com · 03/09/2025

Aug 31 : Sept 1

Man in the water wearing a life vest he is so happy

Tech Brose wearing their business vests

Robert Manchild @robertmanchild.com · 02/09/2025

Nice gag 💀

Robert Manchild @robertmanchild.com · 02/09/2025

Two apparent staff members eyeballing Trump like what the fuck

Robert Manchild @robertmanchild.com · 24/08/2025

Happy Anniversary card at Michael Mina. A lady’s middle finger is in the foreground.

Robert Manchild @robertmanchild.com · 24/08/2025

Michael Mina - tiny baby root beer float with a nice cookie

Photo of dessert at Michael Mina with a chocolate treat reading Happy Anniversary

Robert Manchild @robertmanchild.com · 23/08/2025

Airports directing you to the ride share pickup spot.

From the film Goodfellas, Jimmy directing Karen to go down the alley so she could get whacked

Robert Manchild @robertmanchild.com · 23/08/2025

Jean Georges

Photo of dessert at Jean Georges with a chocolate treat reading Happy Anniversary

Robert Manchild @robertmanchild.com · 23/08/2025

Nobu

Photo of dessert at Nobu with a chocolate treat reading Happy Anniversary

Robert Manchild @robertmanchild.com · 08/08/2025

ALL OF US: Welp. Things couldn’t get any worse. BELLAGIO: Introducing the cuck bed.

BELLAGIO hotel room with a sweet little daybed by the window for your cuck.

Robert Manchild @robertmanchild.com · 06/07/2025

she’s just a baby

Bella, a brown pitbull mix on and outdoor deck chair

Bella
Mixed Breed
20.2% American Pit Bull Terrier
19.1% Australian Cattle Dog
10.5% Chow Chow
9.2% German Shepherd Dog
6.4% Siberian Husky
4.8% American Staffordshire Terrier
29.8% Supermutt ©

Robert Manchild @robertmanchild.com · 04/07/2025

🌭

Tweet from @michael_raphone that reads

(Interview to be a hot dog vendor at a baseball park)
INTERVIEWER: how loud can you yell 'hot dogs'?
ME: (eyes go completely black) HOT DOGS

Robert Manchild @robertmanchild.com · 03/07/2025

This should be illegal

Handwritten note on kitchen counter that reads ‘be warned I saw a big spider here and was too scared to do anything about it so…’

Robert Manchild @robertmanchild.com · 14/06/2025

1 second apart.

Screen shot of two nearly simultaneous replies reading ‘what’s wrong with being sexy?’.

Robert Manchild @robertmanchild.com · 14/06/2025

Bobbi Fleckman, publicist for the band Spinal Tap.

Robert Manchild @robertmanchild.com · 20/05/2025

The bread clip sitting in plain sight on the kitchen counter

saw guerrera saying you have no idea where I am

Robert Manchild @robertmanchild.com · 25/04/2025

Don't talk to me or my son ever again

Angry face emoji with a little angry face emoji reaction

Robert Manchild @robertmanchild.com · 22/04/2025

hard boiled egg when the shell doesn’t come off nicely

Lord of the Rings orc with the messed up face who says the age of men is over

Robert Manchild @robertmanchild.com · 19/04/2025

trying to remember how to hard boil eggs for Easter

An anguished looking Guy Pearce from Memento holding up a Polaroid photo of hard boiled eggs.

Forearm tattoos that read THE FACTS and FACT 1: ROLLING BOIL and FACT 2: 13 MIN

The backs of two Polaroid photos with writing on each. One reads ADD VINEGAR! and the other reads DON’T BELIEVE ALLRECIPES.COM

Robert Manchild @robertmanchild.com · 08/04/2025

If I send you this know that my situation changed and you just got the Irish goodbye.

Belinda on White Lotus S3 dipping from the island.

Robert Manchild @robertmanchild.com · 24/03/2025

…in the National Security team group chat

Screenshot from the porn Ted Cruz liked. Blonde woman in red peeking around corner covering her mouth in surprise

Robert Manchild @robertmanchild.com · 22/03/2025

Age yourself with a toy from your childhood.

Big Trak programmable vehicle from the 80 s