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Robert Leponge

@robertleponge.bsky.social
590 followers 548 following 1.9K posts

Old fat sweary bloke Love a mojito(s) Uninfluencer Love my chester draws Former dental model (pre treatment shot) Cheese🤮🤮 Live between France and Spain International worst seller Never shortlisted, no awards

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Robert Leponge @robertleponge.bsky.social · 12h
I'm a bloke, therefore can only see primary colours, and my shorts ALWAYS go with whatever t shirt I pull out that morning. However, I have a decoration question. Have bedside cabinets with hideous handles. Would these, varnished, be a good replacement?
6 champagne corks view from the side6 champagne corks view from above
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Robert Leponge @robertleponge.bsky.social · 30/09/2026
A visit to the oldest alms house in the country, apparently. Wonderful old place, St Cross Hospital near Winchester. Well worth a visit, beautiful garden, and don't forget to ask for your "dole," if you go.
Church building with blue skies Long row of small cottagesVery old building with small castellated towerReally old columbard style building
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Robert Leponge @robertleponge.bsky.social · 16/09/2026
Ladies and gentlemen, I give you ....... September:
Christmas chocolates in a shop.
IN SEPTEMBER
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Robert Leponge @robertleponge.bsky.social · 06/08/2026
I suspect if I spent 25€ on weed I wouldn't be able to see said free drink.
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Robert Leponge @robertleponge.bsky.social · 05/08/2026
Popped in. VERY disappointed.
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Robert Leponge @robertleponge.bsky.social · 28/07/2026
Yesterday, had never ventured so far from home. Bit too windy once in open waters though, so came back.
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Robert Leponge @robertleponge.bsky.social · 01/07/2026
Worse places to spend a night
A marina at sunset.
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Robert Leponge @robertleponge.bsky.social · 13/06/2026
Beers in the South Bank food market in the sun with the granddaughter. Whats not to love?
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Robert Leponge @robertleponge.bsky.social · 12/06/2026
A trip down memory lane yesterday. I went to this skool when I was maybe 6 or 7 years old. I'm now north of 60 and it's the 1st time I've been back. Also saw the house I used to live in. Terrible times, to be honest, with a psychopath for a mother, but nice to see the area again, changed a lot mind
A closed gate behind which is a skool that can't be seen.
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Robert Leponge @robertleponge.bsky.social · 04/06/2026
Just some dude showing off in Porto
Peacock with tail feathers fully expanded.
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Robert Leponge @robertleponge.bsky.social · 29/05/2026
The moon's a balloon. (With apologies to David Niven).
A marina, evening, the moon appearing to rest on top of a mast.
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Robert Leponge @robertleponge.bsky.social · 28/05/2026
🤣🤣 I've also got to get this lot in
Stuff in a van, vestiges of 62 years of life.
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Robert Leponge @robertleponge.bsky.social · 28/05/2026
It's amazing how you don't think you have stuff, until you've spent 3 hours playing grown up Jenga whilst refusing to admit defeat.
Stuff in a storage container, with a full van load still waiting.
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Robert Leponge @robertleponge.bsky.social · 16/05/2026
Dublin, you were, as usual, too full, too expensive, too wet and cold, and, of course, I'll be back.
A green door into a pub.Picture of books and spiral staircase in Trinity College library.Bar in DublinWise words from Brendan Behan.
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Robert Leponge @robertleponge.bsky.social · 14/04/2026
Looks like a lovely day from my bed.
Blue sky with a genoa sail taken from a yacht cabin.
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Robert Leponge @robertleponge.bsky.social · 05/04/2026
Belgium, various places. Mostly lovely, although over tourism is certainly going to be an issue, if it isn't already..
Cabinet containing many different poisons. Building in Belgium somewhereA church towerStained glass window from inside.
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Robert Leponge @robertleponge.bsky.social · 04/04/2026
Ghent? Completed it mate.
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Robert Leponge @robertleponge.bsky.social · 03/04/2026
One of the most beautiful things I've ever seen
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Robert Leponge @robertleponge.bsky.social · 09/03/2026
Similar item??????
Email from Ebay telling me a Queen Mary doll's house is a similar item to a Mini.
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Robert Leponge @robertleponge.bsky.social · 25/02/2026
I suggest they don't send their cars to Kent. Not a chance they'll survive.
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Robert Leponge @robertleponge.bsky.social · 14/01/2026
I just LOVE the Viz. For most non Brits this isn't comprehensible. #amwriting
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Robert Leponge @robertleponge.bsky.social · 07/01/2026
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Robert Leponge @robertleponge.bsky.social · 04/01/2026
Viiiii, faut tjrs acheter votre pain d'un boulanger. Mon cul. Boule coupé, sauf 3 tranches, entièrement comme celle-ci.
A slice of air, with a little bit of bread around it.
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Robert Leponge @robertleponge.bsky.social · 01/01/2026
No better way to start the year. Fresh gâche.
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Robert Leponge @robertleponge.bsky.social · 25/12/2025
I don't remember the last time I had a white Christmas. Seasons greetings to you all.
A garden with about an inch of snow on the grass.
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Robert Leponge @robertleponge.bsky.social · 19/12/2025
So, I'm not an opera fan. Never been my thing. Tonight was spent at the Royal Opera House, watching a performance of #Turandot. I've just got home, feeling slightly underwhelmed. The building is beautiful, saw dresses more expensive than my house, but .... I didn't feel it. Was just a bit meh
Covent Garden entrance to Royal Opera HouseDining area in Royal Opera House.Poster advertising Turandot.
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Robert Leponge @robertleponge.bsky.social · 18/12/2025
I'm neither religious nor a fan of Christmas, but carol singers, in public, just lift my spirits. Well done to those hardy souls in Charring Cross Station in London this evening. Beautiful, and cheered this miserable old bastard.
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Robert Leponge @robertleponge.bsky.social · 18/12/2025
It's an 8 minute walk from my front door to the train station. Opening my front door, the heavens opened. It rained, no, it honked it down, for 7 minutes, 45 seconds. Then stopped. Behold my sodden troosers.
Trousers with a defined mark showing soaking wet and bone dry.
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Robert Leponge @robertleponge.bsky.social · 30/11/2025
They are brilliant, this one was in Porto.
Street art made from collected rubbish in Porto.
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Robert Leponge @robertleponge.bsky.social · 17/11/2025
This will be only tweet about the C word until next month, but I got sent this, as I do every year, and laughed, as I do every year. Carpe diem, and all that, I'll post it now, before I forget.
A tweet from Gerry Adams, the leader of the IRA who's always denied he was in the IRA bemoaning how long it takes to turn off his Christmas lights, with someone else saying "surely you know someone who can fit a timer."
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Robert Leponge @robertleponge.bsky.social · 11/11/2025
To absent friends.
An old fat man in a pub with a glass of port, remembering friends who are no longer here.
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Robert Leponge @robertleponge.bsky.social · 06/11/2025
The view with my morning coffee.
View of yachts in a marina.
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Robert Leponge @robertleponge.bsky.social · 05/11/2025
So, old, fat, toothless and staggeringly still single, I find myself the owner of this 26ft Colvic. Remarkable.
A small yacht in a marinaA small yacht in a marina from the other side.
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Robert Leponge @robertleponge.bsky.social · 12/10/2025
Quick trip to Berlin, 1st time here, enjoying it.
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Robert Leponge @robertleponge.bsky.social · 06/09/2025
Self congratulatory post: Pic 1, crystal on watch when purchased Pic 2, watch with new crystal REPLACED BY ME 1st one I've done, very proud of myself. Applause happily received.
Highly scratched watch crystalSeiko 5 watch with brand new crystal
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Robert Leponge @robertleponge.bsky.social · 02/09/2025
Beautiful skies, happy birdies.
Birds on a wire, in beautiful blue skies.
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Robert Leponge @robertleponge.bsky.social · 22/08/2025
Morning run done, saw this beauty on the warm down.
Big spider web in a rough pyramid shape, first thing in the morning.
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Robert Leponge @robertleponge.bsky.social · 21/08/2025
Whilst I accept that currently La Seine is full of corpses, what French rivers arent full of, is human shit. That's what greed does I guess.
A small French stream in the foothills of the Jura, crystal clear, no condoms, sanitary towels or other English stream delights to be seen.
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Robert Leponge @robertleponge.bsky.social · 10/08/2025
I'm at an airport. Therefore beer. I don't make the rules
A pint of extortionately expensive airport beer.
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Robert Leponge @robertleponge.bsky.social · 30/07/2025
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Robert Leponge @robertleponge.bsky.social · 19/07/2025
I just went to post a letter (remember that?) and saw this.
A small sticker in a British Post box saying "Reminder, don't be so hard on yourself."
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Robert Leponge @robertleponge.bsky.social · 18/07/2025
Rosny sous Bois last Sunday. Why am I so far? Why?
A collection of sweet pastries in a French pâtisserie.
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Robert Leponge @robertleponge.bsky.social · 07/07/2025
Somebody should write a song about these.
The white cliffs of Dover.
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Robert Leponge @robertleponge.bsky.social · 06/07/2025
Why am I so fat? Why?
A display of French pastries in a patisserie
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Robert Leponge @robertleponge.bsky.social · 05/07/2025
I'm neither French nor religious but seeing this burning affected me deeply. Seeing it now, all new, was an emotional moment.
The church Notre Dame de Paris
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Robert Leponge @robertleponge.bsky.social · 22/06/2025
Yup
Picture showing an evil, intelligent war criminal controlling an evil, very unintelligent war criminal, with puppet strings.
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Robert Leponge @robertleponge.bsky.social · 19/06/2025
Happiness is ..... Mid-week beers with my daughter in London.
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Robert Leponge @robertleponge.bsky.social · 01/06/2025
Bom día do Porto. Asked for some hot sauce, was given 2 traditional sauces, and this, "if you want to experiment."
Small bottle of hot pizza sauce flavoured with chillie and whiskey
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Robert Leponge @robertleponge.bsky.social · 31/05/2025
My 1st time here, really enjoying it. Big enough to explore, small enough that everything is close enough. Good weather, brilliant street art all over the place. Good food, cheap beer, what's not to love?
Wall mural of a lady in a blue hat and blue apron.
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Robert Leponge @robertleponge.bsky.social · 31/05/2025
Bom día do Oporto
Adverts for cheap drinks in Porto.
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