robble-rouser.bsky.social @robble-rouser.bsky.social · 4hWent into Canadian Tire for brake pads. Guy at the counter said, "What are you needing today?" I said, "I need brake pads." He got his fingers on the keyboard and said, "OK, what's it for?" I said, "It helps your car stop." 000
robble-rouser.bsky.social @robble-rouser.bsky.social · 14/10/2026I tried a laxative advertised to improve my baseball performance. It didn’t give me the hits I expected, but it did give me the runs. #lamejoke 000
robble-rouser.bsky.social @robble-rouser.bsky.social · 13/10/2026Today marks the 15 year anniversary of when I was scammed by that rental car company. Even after all these years, it still Hertz. 000
robble-rouser.bsky.social @robble-rouser.bsky.social · 09/10/2026Did you hear about a Chameleon who cannot change colors? He Had Reptile Dysfunction. 000
robble-rouser.bsky.social @robble-rouser.bsky.social · 07/10/2026A farmer asked his horse if it had stolen his thesaurus... The horse said, "no." 000
robble-rouser.bsky.social @robble-rouser.bsky.social · 07/10/2026A friend of mine worked for Del Monte for eight years. They are harsh! He fell asleep on the production line just once and got canned. 000
robble-rouser.bsky.social @robble-rouser.bsky.social · 06/10/2026Teacher: What is the most important punctuation mark? Johnny: The period? Teacher: Can you tell me why? Johnny: I don't know, but when my sister missed one of hers, my mom fainted, my dad got mad, and the neighbor left town and never came back. 000
robble-rouser.bsky.social @robble-rouser.bsky.social · 05/10/2026I’ve just about had it with Amazon. Every time I order chicken pellets and grain, they email me three days later asking for their feed back. 000
robble-rouser.bsky.social @robble-rouser.bsky.social · 04/10/2026Why do pancakes always win at baseball? Because they have the best batter. 000
robble-rouser.bsky.social @robble-rouser.bsky.social · 02/10/2026There’s a new sport called “Quiet Tennis”. It’s the same as regular tennis without the racket. 000
robble-rouser.bsky.social @robble-rouser.bsky.social · 02/10/2026Did you know that flammable and inflammable mean the same thing? So is acetone... 000
robble-rouser.bsky.social @robble-rouser.bsky.social · 01/10/2026The first 3 letters of 'Sweden' and 'Denmark' spell out 'Sweden.' The remaining letters spell out 'Denmark.' 000
robble-rouser.bsky.social @robble-rouser.bsky.social · 01/10/2026The guy at the bakery who puts fresh cream in the giant Eclairs is leaving. Who ever gets that job has big choux's to fill! 000
robble-rouser.bsky.social @robble-rouser.bsky.social · 30/09/2026Why is Vader called Lord? Because calling him "Master" made all of the Stormtroopers giggle. 001
robble-rouser.bsky.social @robble-rouser.bsky.social · 29/09/2026A friend of mine got sick on holiday in a small Spanish hotel. He called the front desk, and they said they had a doc on staff. After the doc made him feel better, he said how he was amazed that such a small place would have a doc. The doc nodded and said, "No one expects the Spanish Inn Physician." 000
robble-rouser.bsky.social @robble-rouser.bsky.social · 29/09/2026In Antigua and Barbados, they quote Pi to 3.14 In Jamaica and Cuba 3.14159 In Trinidad and Bermuda 3.141592654 These are the Pi Rates of the Caribbean. 000
robble-rouser.bsky.social @robble-rouser.bsky.social · 28/09/2026What do you call a two dollar chicken? Buck buck. 000
robble-rouser.bsky.social @robble-rouser.bsky.social · 27/09/2026What did Sting say, when he got to the beach? Rocks Sand. 000
robble-rouser.bsky.social @robble-rouser.bsky.social · 26/09/2026The difference between a composer and a pigeon? During a performance when a composer plays, the sound bounces around. When a pigeon makes a noise, a coo sticks. 000
robble-rouser.bsky.social @robble-rouser.bsky.social · 25/09/2026Pirate walks into a bar…. Pirate walks into a bar with a steering wheel In his pants. Pirate: Get me a rum and coke… Bartender: sure but might I ask is that a steering wheel in your pants? Pirate: Yarrrr it’s been driving me nuts!!! 000
robble-rouser.bsky.social @robble-rouser.bsky.social · 24/09/2026A friend of mine was finishing up his PhD dissertation titled "Water Condensation on Grass". It’s dew in the morning. 001
robble-rouser.bsky.social @robble-rouser.bsky.social · 23/09/2026My inflatable house got a puncture last night. Now I'm living in a flat. 000
robble-rouser.bsky.social @robble-rouser.bsky.social · 21/09/2026I just discovered that the word 'nothing' is a palindrome... Backwards it spells 'gnihton', which also means nothing. 000
robble-rouser.bsky.social @robble-rouser.bsky.social · 21/09/2026My trainer told me to add more resistance. So I said “no” louder. 000
robble-rouser.bsky.social @robble-rouser.bsky.social · 20/09/2026I just saw this fella going up a hill with a wheelbarrow full of horseshoes, four leaf clovers and rabbit's feet. I thought: “He’s pushing his luck!” 000
robble-rouser.bsky.social @robble-rouser.bsky.social · 18/09/2026A mailman walks into a bar. He says, “I feel terrible. I’m hungover and I need a drink.” The bartender says, “Hair of the dog that bit you?” 001
robble-rouser.bsky.social @robble-rouser.bsky.social · 17/09/2026What does an escalator do when it's broken? Nothing. Just stairs. 000
robble-rouser.bsky.social @robble-rouser.bsky.social · 16/09/2026They say that during sex you burn off as many calories as running eight miles. Who the hell runs eight miles in 1 minute? 000
robble-rouser.bsky.social @robble-rouser.bsky.social · 16/09/2026I caught a fish. I had some trouble identifying the fish, so I asked it “are you a mackerel? And it said “nah” and then I said “are you a salmon” and it said “nah” so then I figured it out! It must be a “2-nah fish” 000
robble-rouser.bsky.social @robble-rouser.bsky.social · 15/09/2026A friend of mine opened the only mine in a small city that supplies it with the softest mineral on Earth. It’s the talc of the town! 000
robble-rouser.bsky.social @robble-rouser.bsky.social · 15/09/2026I'm not saying I'd be a great museum guide... but I could do a docent job. 000
robble-rouser.bsky.social @robble-rouser.bsky.social · 14/09/2026Tried to park my car up in a residential area. One of the people that lived there shouted over to me, “You can’t park here unless you have a felt frog on your dashboard.” Apparently, I needed a parking kermit. 000
robble-rouser.bsky.social @robble-rouser.bsky.social · 11/09/2026Some idiot threw a bottle of Omega 3 pills at me!!!!! Luckily my injuries were only super fish oil. 000
robble-rouser.bsky.social @robble-rouser.bsky.social · 11/09/2026How many Dementia Patients does it take to change a lightbulb? To get to the other side. 000
robble-rouser.bsky.social @robble-rouser.bsky.social · 10/09/2026What has eyes but can’t see? A blind potato. 000
robble-rouser.bsky.social @robble-rouser.bsky.social · 09/09/2026What do you call a soft drink that’s ready for the collapse of civilization? Dr. Prepper 000
robble-rouser.bsky.social @robble-rouser.bsky.social · 08/09/2026I asked my friend if he wanted to hear a joke about elevators. He said no. I told him it’s an uplifting experience. 000
robble-rouser.bsky.social @robble-rouser.bsky.social · 05/09/2026A friend of mine could never tell time, so he had a neurosurgeon implant a clock in his brain. Now he's having second thoughts. 000
robble-rouser.bsky.social @robble-rouser.bsky.social · 04/09/2026Do you know how to avoid clickbait? . . . . . Obviously not. 000
robble-rouser.bsky.social @robble-rouser.bsky.social · 02/09/2026Did you hear about the parrot with a mute owner? The parrot said, "What's the matter with this guy?" 000
robble-rouser.bsky.social @robble-rouser.bsky.social · 02/09/2026My buddy was telling me about his new hobby of photographing salmon in different outfits. He said that it’s as easy as shooting fish in apparel. #lamejoke 000
robble-rouser.bsky.social @robble-rouser.bsky.social · 01/09/2026Why did the cow cross the road? Because the chicken needed a day off! 000
robble-rouser.bsky.social @robble-rouser.bsky.social · 01/09/2026Apparently you can't use 'beefstew' as a password. It's not stroganoff. 000
robble-rouser.bsky.social @robble-rouser.bsky.social · 31/08/2026What do you call a horse that swims? A swimming horse. If you think the answer was "seahorse," then know that seahorses are a type of fish that only resembles horses. They are completely not related to horses. 000
robble-rouser.bsky.social @robble-rouser.bsky.social · 28/08/2026Why was the math textbook sad? It had too many problems! 000
robble-rouser.bsky.social @robble-rouser.bsky.social · 28/08/2026I got an imaginary abacus for my birthday. I guess it's the thought that counts. #lamejoke 000
robble-rouser.bsky.social @robble-rouser.bsky.social · 27/08/2026At dinner, I told my date I was trying to figure out what her favorite hobby might be. She leaned in, pounded her fist on the table and yelled, “I MAKE JAM AND PUT IT IN TINY GLASS CONTAINERS!” It was jarring. 000
robble-rouser.bsky.social @robble-rouser.bsky.social · 26/08/2026Why did the crab cross the road? He didn't. He used the sidewalk. 000
robble-rouser.bsky.social @robble-rouser.bsky.social · 26/08/2026If one rock is a stone, what do you call two rocks? Sttwo. 000
robble-rouser.bsky.social @robble-rouser.bsky.social · 24/08/2026My neighbour used to be a taxi driver. He left it because he was tired of people talking behind his back. 000
