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Ring My Bell

@ringmybell.sexandlasers.com

18 followers 5 following 80 posts

The only podcast that matters because it's about Taco Bell and masturbation.

Posts Replies Media

Ring My Bell @ringmybell.sexandlasers.com · 19/12/2025

The rest of this email was a boilerplate cold call marketing email about expanding podcast growth. Undoubtedly she has never listened to it. But the opening was certainly quite funny to me given the sometimes confusing premise of my podcast. Anyway, new episode next week! It’s an Xmas miracle!

A screenshot from an email.
From: Allison Harper
To: ringmybell [redacted]

Subject: Is This Ring My Bell?

I just checked out Ring My Bell and I have questions. Serious ones.

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Ring My Bell @ringmybell.sexandlasers.com · 18/08/2025

I've scheduled not one but TWO guests for new episodes. Working on a third. It's the triumphant return of the only podcast that matters: the one that talks about Taco Bell and masturbating. Get ready. Get hyped.

A hand holding a white baseball cap in front of a Taco Bell restaurant. The text on the cap is in purple and reads "People who get diarrhea from Taco Bell are weak and their bloodline is weak and history will forget them."

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Ring My Bell @ringmybell.sexandlasers.com · 11/10/2024

…in bed (My fortune cookie says successful people masturbate.)

A fortune cookie fortune which reads “The road to success is often a lonely one.”

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Ring My Bell @ringmybell.sexandlasers.com · 17/09/2024

Somehow a podcast about eating Taco Bell and masturbating made it into the first million users.

This account was bluesky user #967,840. Somehow.

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Ring My Bell @ringmybell.sexandlasers.com · 11/09/2024

An email which reads:

Greetings Ben M.,
I am loving Ring My Bell!
I have a guest for you who I think would be really relevant to your listeners. His name is Kirk Mauriello and he is an owner at Profit Cookers. He could talk at length about any of these topics:
* The Virtual Kitchen Revolution: How Technology is Changing the Restaurant
Industry
* Maximizing Profits in a Post-Pandem-ic Restaurant Landscape
* The Future of Food Delivery: What's Next for the Industry?
Would your audience find value in these topics? If so, let me know and I can send over his press kit.

A screenshot from the Simpsons. Nelson and Milhouse are looking annoyed. Milhouse says “no one who listened to the podcast would say that.”

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Ring My Bell @ringmybell.sexandlasers.com · 31/07/2024

Every now and then this PR firm reaches out to me via automated email (I know it’s automated because I get the same for my other podcasts). I finally got tired of it.

Michelle,
You've reached out to me several times and I have continued to ignore it each time. But I'm tired of it. So here's the thing. This podcast is a podcast literally about consuming Taco Bell and jerking off. It has fewer than 20 episodes despite having been started four years ago.
There is literally no market for this podcast.
There is a negative market for podcast, in fact.
Most people worry about me just a little bit when they discover I do this podcast and they're probably right to do so. You can go ahead and remove me from whatever mailing list I'm on because podcasts about eating Crunchwrap Supremes and crankin' it are at best unmarketable and at worst a career killer.
Have a great day!
- Ben

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Ring My Bell @ringmybell.sexandlasers.com · 16/10/2023

Why not get their own porn? But whatever I’m fine with this.

A screenshot from Twitter from user Gracey @Gracebal0. The tweet reads “if you are about to watch porn, remember all these angels are watching you.” The picture included on the tweet shows hundreds of angels looking down at the earth through a hole in the clouds.

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Ring My Bell @ringmybell.sexandlasers.com · 08/10/2023

A cartoon of Jesus Christ and some anime person with a newspaper pirate hat. Jesus says "no, I am not turning water into Baja Blast for you" and the person is saying "please J-man"

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Ring My Bell @ringmybell.sexandlasers.com · 29/09/2023

I’ve lived my life in a way where friends will randomly text me things like this and I have zero regrets.

A text message exchange. The top reads “I'm having Taco Bell for the first time in ages. I *will* masturbate tonight as well. To honor the show.” The bottom reads “Excellent. I approve wholeheartedly. Bravo!”

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Ring My Bell @ringmybell.sexandlasers.com · 17/09/2023

Somehow I wasn't the one who made this.

Four panel simpsons meme:
Top panel shows Nelson, Milhouse and bart on the playground. Milhouse says "I jacked it 13 times last night."

Second panel, Nelson says "I jacked it 17 times."

Third panel shows Bart, saying "You guys must be getting pretty tired of jacking it."

Fourth panel shows Nelson and Milhouse saying "No one who ever jacked it would say that."

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