Sign in

The Ultimate Worrier ™

@ribbons.bsky.social
99 followers 102 following 2.3K posts

A few sentient thoughts interspersed between BAD PUNS AND PARODY. My ReSkeets are not just endorsements, they're also requests for sex. I once made $5 online. Pronouns: Me/Mine.

PostsRepliesMedia
The Ultimate Worrier ™ @ribbons.bsky.social · 1h
How do rich people keep their money? Like if you have $500 million? You keep it in a savings account or what?
000
The Ultimate Worrier ™ @ribbons.bsky.social · 06/10/2026
I want to be a nationalist. But first, I must have a country and lose a good portion of my IQ. It's like that time I wanted to launder money, but I only had $80.
000
The Ultimate Worrier ™ @ribbons.bsky.social · 06/10/2026
Damn. That guy has a permanent, Who cares? Look.
000
The Ultimate Worrier ™ @ribbons.bsky.social · 05/10/2026
That's the only way Kash Patel could get to 2nd base.
000
The Ultimate Worrier ™ @ribbons.bsky.social · 05/10/2026
Even then, she's not gonna fuck him.
010
The Ultimate Worrier ™ @ribbons.bsky.social · 05/10/2026
Because it's a shit country?
010
The Ultimate Worrier ™ @ribbons.bsky.social · 05/10/2026
They would make a strange kid.
020
The Ultimate Worrier ™ @ribbons.bsky.social · 05/10/2026
Landowners during slavery were living large. They had people do all their chores. No wonder they didn't want to give it up. Once you life that life, it's hard to downgrade. Some places still have this system, although the people who do menial work are not called slaves.
000
The Ultimate Worrier ™ @ribbons.bsky.social · 04/10/2026
Russia should do something about it.
010
The Ultimate Worrier ™ @ribbons.bsky.social · 04/10/2026
Ultranationalist. Every country has them. They are just too stupid to understand why they're nationalists.
020
The Ultimate Worrier ™ @ribbons.bsky.social · 04/10/2026
The plague might be back. It's started in Russia. Super news.
000
The Ultimate Worrier ™ @ribbons.bsky.social · 04/10/2026
If MBS does not get what he wants, heads will roll. Literally.
000
The Ultimate Worrier ™ @ribbons.bsky.social · 04/10/2026
In the Middle East, they just chop your head. No botched executions. Heads up. Saudi Arabia executed almost 400 in 2025.
101
The Ultimate Worrier ™ @ribbons.bsky.social · 03/10/2026
In Canada they allow people who are not well to commit suicide. It's assisted suicide. No botched suicides. It's a hot topic b/c that law is being misused. However, I think people should have the right to die with dignity.
000
The Ultimate Worrier ™ @ribbons.bsky.social · 03/10/2026
Shoeing horses looks like a fun job.
000
The Ultimate Worrier ™ @ribbons.bsky.social · 03/10/2026
We actually need an armageddon to even things out.
000
The Ultimate Worrier ™ @ribbons.bsky.social · 03/10/2026
High tea is dead. Long live high tea.
000
The Ultimate Worrier ™ @ribbons.bsky.social · 02/10/2026
Great to see an old disease make a comeback. It's kinda nostalgic.
040
The Ultimate Worrier ™ @ribbons.bsky.social · 02/10/2026
Damn. That's nasty.
010
The Ultimate Worrier ™ @ribbons.bsky.social · 02/10/2026
You might even get Melania's sister.
000
The Ultimate Worrier ™ @ribbons.bsky.social · 02/10/2026
MAGA loves mail-order brides, but the friction in getting one can be tough. So I made a mail-order bride vending machine for MAGA slackers. You put some currency in and out pops a mail-order trad wife.
100
The Ultimate Worrier ™ @ribbons.bsky.social · 02/10/2026
An erection is a dead giveaway.
000
The Ultimate Worrier ™ @ribbons.bsky.social · 01/10/2026
Seems deliberate.
010
The Ultimate Worrier ™ @ribbons.bsky.social · 01/10/2026
Why did you use Satanic? To dehumanize her?
260
The Ultimate Worrier ™ @ribbons.bsky.social · 01/10/2026
The relationship between IQ and the ability to recognize satire.
000
The Ultimate Worrier ™ @ribbons.bsky.social · 01/10/2026
Way to go!
000
The Ultimate Worrier ™ @ribbons.bsky.social · 01/10/2026
Some guy was fired after he got injured at work and asked to see a doctor. They said he was late and absent--A lie. This guy had a Google timeline of every day he went to work. That's actually pretty smart if you expect your employer to do shady things.
000
The Ultimate Worrier ™ @ribbons.bsky.social · 01/10/2026
Cheetahs are explicitly mentioned in the Big Cat law. Although there is never been, in the history of mankind, a cheetah attack on a human. They are really friendly cats.
000
The Ultimate Worrier ™ @ribbons.bsky.social · 01/10/2026
The US passed a federal law, Big Cat Public Safety Act, in 2022 that prohibits new private ownership of big cats. Some big cats can't be domesticated and they're dangerous. But my nit is that people should be allowed to take risks. If they become lunch, that's on them. Also, Cheetahs are friendly.
100
The Ultimate Worrier ™ @ribbons.bsky.social · 30/09/2026
Gemini is the worst of the lot.
010
The Ultimate Worrier ™ @ribbons.bsky.social · 30/09/2026
Some girl couldn't get a job and jokingly said she might become a tradwife. Damn, that's true! Tradwives don't want to work, but IMO housework and cooking is much worse than a regular desk job. The worst thing is after some time, the man can just dump you and move to a younger model.
000
The Ultimate Worrier ™ @ribbons.bsky.social · 30/09/2026
The good news is that her other leg is getting better
000
The Ultimate Worrier ™ @ribbons.bsky.social · 29/09/2026
I resent being called a delusional adult. I like to think of myself as a superhero.
000
The Ultimate Worrier ™ @ribbons.bsky.social · 29/09/2026
What is specially dangerous with the new right-wing surge is doctors screwing patients they don't see as human. South African doctors did this even in the 90s.
001
The Ultimate Worrier ™ @ribbons.bsky.social · 29/09/2026
That will just make rich people want it more.
040
The Ultimate Worrier ™ @ribbons.bsky.social · 29/09/2026
The Sri Lankan people have committed genocide against the Tamils. I'm only mentioning this because Germany's AfD's Lesbian Hitler's Sri Lankan partdner only makes sense if you take this info into context. I don't know her Sri Lankan partdner, but everyone has seen how Lesbian Hitler is. #AfD
000
The Ultimate Worrier ™ @ribbons.bsky.social · 29/09/2026
This is MAGA porn.
000
The Ultimate Worrier ™ @ribbons.bsky.social · 28/09/2026
OpenAI handing out free usage to people is like the CIA giving drugs to addicts to keep them hooked. After some time, they are depended b/c the alternative is too unpleasant.
000
The Ultimate Worrier ™ @ribbons.bsky.social · 28/09/2026
It's an animal thing. I just mark my territory and if any outlander passes, he gets hammered.
000
The Ultimate Worrier ™ @ribbons.bsky.social · 28/09/2026
What is interesting is that nationalism is not limited to people from good countries. Even people from the shittiest shithole on the planet are hyper nationalists and hate foreigners.
100
The Ultimate Worrier ™ @ribbons.bsky.social · 28/09/2026
AFAIK, according to Catholics, homosexuality was evil only when there was a penis involved. So the dictator is always male.
000
The Ultimate Worrier ™ @ribbons.bsky.social · 28/09/2026
They are dumb enough to be MAGA.
000
The Ultimate Worrier ™ @ribbons.bsky.social · 28/09/2026
There is a little latent homosexual lurking in every dictator loving fascist.
100
The Ultimate Worrier ™ @ribbons.bsky.social · 28/09/2026
With AfD winning and the neo-Nazi surge, migrants will be targeted. They already are, but it will get worse.
000
The Ultimate Worrier ™ @ribbons.bsky.social · 28/09/2026
I thought kids today stayed at home and played video games. Also, if you want to move to a small town in Germany/Europe, it's not exactly picture perfect.
Kids throw tomatoes, eggs, and piss bags at apartment in Germany.
100
The Ultimate Worrier ™ @ribbons.bsky.social · 28/09/2026
I read a post where some woman in a gym accused a guy of looking. The thing is, I don't know if the post is real or just to farm Reddit karma. But I don't even look these days.
000
The Ultimate Worrier ™ @ribbons.bsky.social · 27/09/2026
Some guy is crying b/c he use ChatGPT to do everything and now his account is banned and any new account he creates also gets banned. So now he can't do anything.
000
The Ultimate Worrier ™ @ribbons.bsky.social · 25/09/2026
Honestly, I'm surprised how quickly AI has improved. It's nothing like how it was in 2024. And now it's improving fast.
100
The Ultimate Worrier ™ @ribbons.bsky.social · 25/09/2026
I logged into LinkedIn after years and I'm hit with people saying they are homeless and living out of their car and they have applied to thousands of jobs over many years, but are not getting anywhere. And they are not even software developers. Anyway, I logged out. AI will make things worse.
100
The Ultimate Worrier ™ @ribbons.bsky.social · 25/09/2026
What's a yogagasm?
000