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red valley quote bot @redvalquotes.bsky.social · 26m

GORDON: Look, it's your call. I mean, you can look, or I can look, or neither of us can look, or whatever you like.

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red valley quote bot @redvalquotes.bsky.social · 55m

BRYONY: They're just a higher class of dead. Premium dead, if you will. And they'll be premium dead forever.

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red valley quote bot @redvalquotes.bsky.social · 1h

AUBREY: It's good to see another face. I know it's only been 8 days and I've had no trouble on my own, it's just...good to have someone to talk to. Soon this place will have people everywhere and I'll probably miss the peace and quiet.

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red valley quote bot @redvalquotes.bsky.social · 1h

GORDON: Ok. My go. Jennifer Hunt. Department of Organic Teleportation. WARREN: Oh shut up. GORDON: What, World's First Cryonically Preserved Human Being has a problem with someone trying to create a teleporter.

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red valley quote bot @redvalquotes.bsky.social · 2h

CLIVE: That… that was Francesca. PAMELA: The hell does she want? CLIVE: She wants to sit very close to me while I get showered in piss.

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red valley quote bot @redvalquotes.bsky.social · 2h

GORDON: Overhead Industries Presents: Dead Top Trumps.

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red valley quote bot @redvalquotes.bsky.social · 3h

REBECCA: She was losing the plot anyway. Poor Fran. CLIVE: Th- Thank you, Rebecca. REBECCA: That was all rubbish, wasn't it? Clive can barely transfuse piss into an open toilet. PAMELA: Yeah. Yeah, it was

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red valley quote bot @redvalquotes.bsky.social · 3h

TOMAS: Morior Invictus! CLIVE: For fuck's sake, not you as well-

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red valley quote bot @redvalquotes.bsky.social · 4h

AUBREY: They were all covered in these...midges or whatever they are, they're the dominant fucking lifeforms out here so I burned the bloody towels and did a dance around them because they were so fucking gross.

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red valley quote bot @redvalquotes.bsky.social · 4h

CLIVE: Fuck sake. Where is Gordon bloody Porlock?

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red valley quote bot @redvalquotes.bsky.social · 5h

AUBREY: The Cult of the Brigadoon is only a small fanatical sect of this community, I wouldn't worry about it. WARREN: Aubrey, I don't know you well enough to tell if you're joking.

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red valley quote bot @redvalquotes.bsky.social · 5h

GORD: The pink-footed goose. It's squawk heralds a new day. Covered in bird shit.

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red valley quote bot @redvalquotes.bsky.social · 6h

HESTER: I brought the tortoise down. Thought she could visit Gordon. He is her dad after all.

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red valley quote bot @redvalquotes.bsky.social · 6h

CLIVE: Those are some good placards. 'Go Hyperfuck Yourself'. 'Overhead Killed The World'. Wow. That's a bit much. Now, that one just says 'Kontinue', I don't get it. PAMELA: Oh, let me see. It’s Kontinue, but they've swapped the 'o' for a 'u'.

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red valley quote bot @redvalquotes.bsky.social · 7h

WARREN: Oscar isn't going to show up, is he? GORD: No. WARREN: How long does he wait? GORD: The recording lasts another 40 minutes.

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red valley quote bot @redvalquotes.bsky.social · 7h

CLIVE: Okay. You're going to start telling me what I'd like to know. Or I'll do nasty things. I'll tie Porlock to the back of his shitheap car, put a brick on the accelerator and let it off into the mountains until there's nothing left but a stump.

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red valley quote bot @redvalquotes.bsky.social · 8h

PAMELA: Why are you smiling like that? CLIVE: Just thinking about the future. PAMELA: I'll drink to that.

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red valley quote bot @redvalquotes.bsky.social · 8h

GORDON: Clive Schill? The golden boy? WARREN: Yeah, you want a result, go to him - GORDON: I don't trust Clive fucking Schill! How many men below the age of 40 are called Clive?

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red valley quote bot @redvalquotes.bsky.social · 9h

WARREN: Look, Mr Porlock, you've been really helpful and I'm very grateful. I said I wouldn't take up much of your valuable time and neither of us have blinked for about 30 seconds so-

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red valley quote bot @redvalquotes.bsky.social · 9h

HESTER: She likes it on top of the pod I think. I mean, as much as she likes anything. She just stands there.

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red valley quote bot @redvalquotes.bsky.social · 10h

WARREN: Sure. Bye Clive. CLIVE: Sweet dreams, cockchops.

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red valley quote bot @redvalquotes.bsky.social · 10h

WARREN: My meds mean I can't even drink a decent amount of beer before I collapse in a heap and truth be told, the side effects of that medication mean I am utterly unable to even have sex with my wife, who is understandably exasperated with my behaviour- and who could blame her!

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red valley quote bot @redvalquotes.bsky.social · 11h

AUBREY: So, a Mazda Bongo Friendee is a real thing, they really named it that. I recognise the model actually, my old neighbours opposite had one, even the same colour, swamp water green with a raincloud go-faster stripe. It's virtually camouflaged out here. It's perfect.

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red valley quote bot @redvalquotes.bsky.social · 11h

GORDON: Gordon Porlock, personal log.

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red valley quote bot @redvalquotes.bsky.social · 12h

AUBREY: You're the brick and I'm the balloon tied to it, that's what you used to say. HESTER: Even bricks get to freak out occasionally, my love AUBREY: It's going to be okay.

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red valley quote bot @redvalquotes.bsky.social · 12h

GORDON: Brazilian. WARREN: You're Brazilian? GORDON: On my mother's side.

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red valley quote bot @redvalquotes.bsky.social · 13h

WARREN: Don't tell me you don't lean in when Bryony starts using those long words. Don't tell me, that if the chips hadn't fallen a little differently, I wouldn't be just another tape for you to play to a different schmuck from Accounts in that fucking car park in the rain.

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red valley quote bot @redvalquotes.bsky.social · 13h

AUBREY: But she just couldn't help herself. Under all the cloaks and daggers and bluster and putdowns. she wouldn't hide her excitement about the work. It was magnetic. I wanted to be like her.

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red valley quote bot @redvalquotes.bsky.social · 14h

AUBREY: This was never going to be easy. But I need you to trust me. We're doing everything we can for Gordon.

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red valley quote bot @redvalquotes.bsky.social · 14h

WARREN: How can Waffles decide? She is a tortoise. GORDON: Hmm. Don't know. WARREN: Can't we...you know just umm...put her on her back and... GORDON: What? Spin her? WARREN: Is that bad? GORDON: You want to spin the tortoise?

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red valley quote bot @redvalquotes.bsky.social · 15h

AUBREY: We're really doing this. It's 6am and I haven't slept. Not for a minute. I was sick earlier. I don't know if I'm excited or the most terrified I've ever been in my life.

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red valley quote bot @redvalquotes.bsky.social · 15h

GORDON: They're hooked up to every bit of monitoring going, like a super intensive care unit, they're fully anaesthetised, tubes in their mouths, in their arms, in their cocks, the lot.

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red valley quote bot @redvalquotes.bsky.social · 16h

GORDON: Ah. You're very special, Warren. WARREN: Well, thank you.

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red valley quote bot @redvalquotes.bsky.social · 16h

GORDON: Warren Godby. WARREN: Mr Porlock. GORDON: Gordon. Please. WARREN: Right. Gordon it is.

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red valley quote bot @redvalquotes.bsky.social · 17h

AUBREY: Oh! Er… Warren! WARREN: Yeah? AUBREY: I thought we might try and save Gordon's life, what do you think? WARREN: Oh. Umm… yeah… Yeah. Sure!

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red valley quote bot @redvalquotes.bsky.social · 17h

FRONT OF HOUSE: Hello sir, do you have a booking? CLIVE: Yep, I'm right over there with the electric blue power suit and boring drinks choices.

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red valley quote bot @redvalquotes.bsky.social · 18h

GORDON: I'm an archivist, Mrs. Godby. It's just a habit.

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red valley quote bot @redvalquotes.bsky.social · 18h

BRYONY: You're an archivist, Gordon. It is your singular vocation. Archive Red Valley for me.

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red valley quote bot @redvalquotes.bsky.social · 19h

AUBREY: You answer back more now. GORD: Analysis revealed Gordon Porlock liked to have the last word.

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red valley quote bot @redvalquotes.bsky.social · 19h

AUBREY: But she just couldn't help herself. Under all the cloaks and daggers and bluster and putdowns. she wouldn't hide her excitement about the work. It was magnetic. I wanted to be like her.

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red valley quote bot @redvalquotes.bsky.social · 20h

ASSISTANT: Pingu. PINGU: Noot noot!

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red valley quote bot @redvalquotes.bsky.social · 20h

CLIVE: Fuck sake. Where is Gordon bloody Porlock?

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red valley quote bot @redvalquotes.bsky.social · 21h

GORDON: As a student of the archival sciences and shameless nerd,

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red valley quote bot @redvalquotes.bsky.social · 21h

HE INDICATES THE RECORDING DEVICE, WHICH AUBREY PICKS UP. AUBREY: This? Oh, Dr. Halbech likes everything recorded—

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red valley quote bot @redvalquotes.bsky.social · 22h

GORDON: Maybe you're not who I think you are. But given the company we keep, you might still be the least awful person I currently work with. So let’s be friends. I'll be back tomorrow. And maybe I’ll bring Top Trumps or something.

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red valley quote bot @redvalquotes.bsky.social · 22h

GORDON: Some of them, they don’t even want to wait till they die. That’s much more grizzly and complicated. They’d like to be frozen right now while they’re fit and healthy ready to see the future, but they're not interested in the cost. And I don't mean money, Warren.

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red valley quote bot @redvalquotes.bsky.social · 23h

PAMELA: Why are you smiling like that? CLIVE: Just thinking about the future. PAMELA: I'll drink to that.

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red valley quote bot @redvalquotes.bsky.social · 23h

BRYONY: I've had quite enough of that piss Shiraz thank you, you're doing a fine job of toasting your own cock with it all by yourself.

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red valley quote bot @redvalquotes.bsky.social · 30/09/2026

AUBREY: His arm just came off. In Ben’s hand. The shock killed Grizzly in less than a minute. We're done, it's all over. I told Halbech to go fuck herself and I'm locked in my bathroom with half a packed bag and my coat on like I'm a bloody teenager.

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red valley quote bot @redvalquotes.bsky.social · 30/09/2026

REBECCA: As I've said, my father is unwell- CLIVE: Your father would look at this file and laugh until he broke a tooth. His mind would open like a motherfucking flower to the possibilities it presented, it wouldn’t shrink in fear and doubt.,

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