iiinova — where your digital self keeps evolving

I'm still struggling with the fact that getting better doesn't mean I'll feel less suicidal when I do, just that I don't feel suicidal as often. It still sucks, because it feels like I'm hitting rock bottom everytime I do.

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Jana 🤡 @quthulhu.bsky.social · 30/09/2026

Aion 2 is great i wish I wasn't so busy T-T

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Reposted by Jana 🤡

Wolve_Rain 🌙 Spooky Sale 🎃 @wolve-rain.bsky.social · 30/09/2026

Be Proud! Be Yourself! 🏳️‍🌈 #artsky #ocart

My oc Ro. A patch up doll walking away from the viewer holding a big rainbow flag over her head. Long hair braided in several braids. Ripped posters on the side showing symbols of the lgbtq community

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Jana 🤡 @quthulhu.bsky.social · 30/09/2026

Woke up, went outside and saw this in the sky

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Reposted by Jana 🤡

#3D Noodles @3dnoodles.bsky.social · 27/09/2026

The HUD in my indie game Hunters Rain is minimal. Only your health appears in the bottom right. And if you're holding a weapon it shows in the bottom left. Contemplating adding stats or if I should keep it minimal. Here's a Sunday screenshot. #IndieGame #IndieDev #GameDev

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Jana 🤡 @quthulhu.bsky.social · 27/09/2026

Out of all the things people gatekeep, rice annoys me the most. If you ever hear a mf talk about how to cook rice properly, you can be almost certain they're about to invalidate a shitton of food culture.

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Jana 🤡 @quthulhu.bsky.social · 26/09/2026

It's finally the time of the year again, where I can go to sleep with my Hoodia on.

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Jana 🤡 @quthulhu.bsky.social · 24/09/2026

Having a couple of accountability buddies has really made a positive impact on my life in a short time. I'm actually productive again T-T

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Reposted by Jana 🤡

#3D Noodles @3dnoodles.bsky.social · 19/09/2026

Happy #screenshotsaturday. Hunters Rain has been approved for the steam platform. I'm tinkering on a game play trailer and ironing out bugs. Not long now before it can be wish listed. 🤞 #gamedev #indiedev #solodev #unreal

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Jana 🤡 @quthulhu.bsky.social · 18/09/2026

Just rewatched JUNK HEAD and then watched the prequel JUNK WORLD and I have to urge you to watch these movies. They're stop motion dystopian sci-fi comedies from Japan and it's legit such a shame no one knows about them.

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Jana 🤡 @quthulhu.bsky.social · 17/09/2026

Once I'm back on track with day to day life I want to find an identity for Fincester Tower I feel happy with.

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Jana 🤡 @quthulhu.bsky.social · 17/09/2026

I guess I'm the kinda person that wakes up at 5 am again. I wonder why I can sometimes do it no problem while I struggle with it other times.

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Jana 🤡 @quthulhu.bsky.social · 12/09/2026

I'm starting to see everyone is flawed. But so many of us are scared to show our flaws off. These days it's normalized to not be flawed and we need to show off our ugly sides so that other people are free to be ugly as well. Everyone has them. We need to show understanding and show we relate.

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Jana 🤡 @quthulhu.bsky.social · 08/09/2026

I was gifted a white rose by a stranger a couple of days ago. It started wilting, so I picked the petals and put them into isopropyl alcohol together with some lavender. Filtered it, mixed it with a saline solution and put it in the fridge so I can separate and use it later.

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Jana 🤡 @quthulhu.bsky.social · 08/09/2026

Life sucks but at least there's iodised salt.

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Jana 🤡 @quthulhu.bsky.social · 08/09/2026

I just spent an hour trying to find this song and I finally found it and now I need to share it because it's just so good. youtu.be/d28y8SX5KWw

youtu.be

Bob James - Take Me to the Mardi Gras

YouTube video by Skipskabriarius

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Reposted by Jana 🤡

Balmut @balmut.bsky.social · 06/09/2026

Ahah! Fixed Animal Re-spawning. I had them spawning in Chunks not Sub-Chunks, so it wasn't checking the amount correctly.

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Jana 🤡 @quthulhu.bsky.social · 06/09/2026

Made another one about a gnome but not in German and also I uploaded it here instead of just insta (should've done so from the start)

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Reposted by Jana 🤡

#3D Noodles @3dnoodles.bsky.social · 06/09/2026

Weekend #mood tinkering on my indie game project Hunters Rain. #indiegame #indiedev #wip #huntersrain #unreal #screenshotsaturday

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Jana 🤡 @quthulhu.bsky.social · 06/09/2026

Next day, never doing this again. Though the bathroom needed cleaning anyways.

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Jana 🤡 @quthulhu.bsky.social · 05/09/2026

Everyone who's a homophobe is sbitch btw. And I'm gonna fuck them up. Come at me homophobes.

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Jana 🤡 @quthulhu.bsky.social · 05/09/2026

SNOOP DOGG UR A BITCH AND YOUR MOMMY DIDN'T RAISE YOU RIGHT YOU HOMOPHOBIC PIECE OF SHIT

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Jana 🤡 @quthulhu.bsky.social · 05/09/2026

I wanna make a lesbian survival game, where you and your partner are illegally in love and on the run but also there's unspeakable horrors outside the countries borders that will nomnomnom the living crap out of you and generally everything kinda sucks except the love part.

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Jana 🤡 @quthulhu.bsky.social · 04/09/2026

I can't even remember the last time I had some genuine joy... why am I doing any of this?

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Jana 🤡 @quthulhu.bsky.social · 03/09/2026

Whoever kills me gets to keep my pocketschange

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Jana 🤡 @quthulhu.bsky.social · 03/09/2026

I wish I widn't have to wake up anymore. Nothing good about it.

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Jana 🤡 @quthulhu.bsky.social · 02/09/2026

I fucking hate everything about this life why should I continue

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Jana 🤡 @quthulhu.bsky.social · 02/09/2026

Nothing offers relief but death. I can't cut enough to bleed out. Nothing in life is worth doing any of this. I just wanna die.

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Jana 🤡 @quthulhu.bsky.social · 02/09/2026

I wish I'd have never been born. Now I gotta fix this shit all by mysslf

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Jana 🤡 @quthulhu.bsky.social · 02/09/2026

Fuck it'll. Fuck everything. Fuck everyone who wants to keep mealive for their entertainment. You are part of the problem.

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Jana 🤡 @quthulhu.bsky.social · 02/09/2026

And all this hypocritical bullshiy about how it can get better. Fuck all of you fucking imps.

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Jana 🤡 @quthulhu.bsky.social · 02/09/2026

We're all being tticked by those fuckholes that think things can get better so they can watch and laugh at all thissuffering

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Jana 🤡 @quthulhu.bsky.social · 02/09/2026

I can't handle this pain much longer

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Jana 🤡 @quthulhu.bsky.social · 02/09/2026

Happi ess is a lie. There is no reason I should be alive. Nothing I can be striving for would change anything. Life is a sick and twisted joke.

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Jana 🤡 @quthulhu.bsky.social · 02/09/2026

Life has no positives. Nothing can be positive if it's found within a mountain of shit. I hope soon I'll get it over with because my dnergy is almost depleted.

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Jana 🤡 @quthulhu.bsky.social · 02/09/2026

I wish there was no stigma around it. I've been meaning to end it all for years and years to come. Life has been naught but suffering and pain for as long as I remember, and help has only been trying to make the pain longer . I don't wanna be, think,see or witness.

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Jana 🤡 @quthulhu.bsky.social · 01/09/2026

I'm honestly just waiting for my suicidal thoughts to gain the upper hand these days. Ever since I was 10 y/o I've been physically unable to be happy and wanting nothing more than to stop existing. I hope that soon I stop being such a coward and just fucking do it.

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Jana 🤡 @quthulhu.bsky.social · 31/08/2026

Went out to buy some potato chips for the soul and the cashier gifted me this rose. And to think I almost didn't go to the store.

A white rose held by hands with slightly eroded black polish, against an off-white wall

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Jana 🤡 @quthulhu.bsky.social · 24/08/2026

My psych appointment was supposed to be last week, was moved to early September. Just received a letter that it's been moved again, this time to November. Fuck this fuckass life. Nothing ever works, no help is ever available and there is absolutely nothing worth living for.

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Jana 🤡 @quthulhu.bsky.social · 23/08/2026

What do you do when you feel hopeless? When everytime you try to be productive the thought "nothing matters anyways" forces itself into your head and makes it impossible? I'm honestly at the end of my rope. It feels like nothing I can do is worth it but doing nothing isn't much different.

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Jana 🤡 @quthulhu.bsky.social · 18/08/2026

Was walking home when a couple of pigeons undid a roof tile that landed just behind me. Had I walked just the tiniest bit slower... 💀

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Reposted by Jana 🤡

Balmut @balmut.bsky.social · 01/08/2026

I'm still seriously behind but I got my Progress Post for June out last night, hopefully I can get some good chunks of time to work on things consistently soon. www.patreon.com/Balmut/posts... #gameDev #indieDev #pixelArt #goblins #farmingRPG #townBuilder #rpg #indieGames

patreon.com

June Game Dev Progress (2026) | Balmut

June Game Dev Progress (2026) by Balmut on Patreon. Join Balmut's community for exclusive content and updates.

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Jana 🤡 @quthulhu.bsky.social · 02/08/2026

Writing sexual song texts as someone on the ace spectrum feels super weird.

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Reposted by Jana 🤡

Skylor Beck @skylorbeck.website · 25/07/2026

I started working on this Game Dev Trading Card builder the other day. It'll be downloadable on Itch eventually, but for now just behold the debug and placeholder elements!

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Reposted by Jana 🤡

Mary🐢 @mirukimary.bsky.social · 25/07/2026

⚔️ Attack 3 ⚔️ Sylvan for Sleepymaam #art #artfight #artfight2026

Slightly chibified sketch of a black man with square-y afro carrying a pie he just baked and smilling proudly! ...Well, maybe a bit bashfully. Around him are many other sweet treats, all made by him as well: Croassaints, cakes of various flavors, cookies of all shapes and macarons. The drawing is tied nicely with a purple ribbon, matching his outfit.

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Jana 🤡 @quthulhu.bsky.social · 19/07/2026

I just took care of a problem I've been procrastinating on for over a year. And even though I know I'm disabled, it's so difficult for me to just be proud of it, because I know that - on a good day - I could've taken care of it in half an hour.

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Jana 🤡 @quthulhu.bsky.social · 18/07/2026

I feel like medieval royalty would go crazy for those lavender scented toilet stones that dye the water you poop into purple.

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