Sign in

Nicola

@pigeonpenelope.bsky.social
213 followers 191 following 2.2K posts

I’m a salty, fat, cis-het from the Pacific Northwest. Possibly autistic. I probably like your cat (not a euphemism). My opinions are my own. She/they

PostsRepliesMedia
Nicola @pigeonpenelope.bsky.social · 11/10/2026
It’s that time of the year where I’m reminded that I’m an obligation to get out of the way, and failure to go with the flow in anyway results in conflicts that I’m to avoid at all emotional costs.
000
Nicola @pigeonpenelope.bsky.social · 25/08/2026
Rest in love, Dolly Pardon 💕
000
Nicola @pigeonpenelope.bsky.social · 21/06/2026
My neighbor’s playing rap in his backyard loud enough for me to hear it, but not loud enough for me to enjoy it, and now I gotta work up the audacity to ask him to turn it up.
static.klipy.com
Me Avoiding Social Interactions
ALT: Me Avoiding Social Interactions
100
Nicola @pigeonpenelope.bsky.social · 26/02/2026
I’m old enough to remember when Flava Flav had that one reality tv show where he degraded women. He’s also been convicted of domestic violence.
000
Nicola @pigeonpenelope.bsky.social · 24/12/2025
I recognize this might ruffle feathers but I’m grateful my parents never did Santa. I hate being lied to and I hate costumed ppl. They didn’t for their religious reasons. We also did birthday cakes for Jesus. Too much sugary sweets imho.
000
Nicola @pigeonpenelope.bsky.social · 14/12/2025
David Berkowitz was an incel. #serialkillers #sonofsam
000
Nicola @pigeonpenelope.bsky.social · 07/12/2025
I was a kid/teen in the 90s and so I had no idea but holyfuckingshit about PDiddy. Fuck that guy.
000
Nicola @pigeonpenelope.bsky.social · 23/11/2025
I live in a semi-rural area in western Washington and I do all my grocery shopping online. I thought I’d see if there’s cranberry chutney. This was the first thing on the list.
The heading of the text says cranberry chutney, but the first product shown is a jar of mayonnaise.
020
Nicola @pigeonpenelope.bsky.social · 05/11/2025
Years ago, in my early 20s, I had a bumper sticker on my car that said, “Dick Cheney shoots his friends.” Anyway, glad he’s dead. Fuck that guy.
010
Nicola @pigeonpenelope.bsky.social · 01/11/2025
Reposting this to let @microsoft.com know I’m still big mad about this.
000
Reposted by Nicola
Nicola @pigeonpenelope.bsky.social · 30/07/2025
But seriously, what the ever living fuck did you guys think you were doing microsoft? microsoft.com @developer.microsoft.com?! Oh and One Note tabs are vertical and not horizontal and I can’t fix that either. I’m so big mad right now.
microsoft.com
Microsoft – AI, Cloud, Productivity, Computing, Gaming & Apps
Explore Microsoft products and services and support for your home or business. Shop Microsoft 365, Copilot, Teams, Xbox, Windows, Azure, Surface and more.
001
Nicola @pigeonpenelope.bsky.social · 01/11/2025
Was worried we wouldn’t have trick o treaters. Now I’m worried there won’t be enough goody bags.
Almost empty bucket of hand-shaped goody bags.
020
Nicola @pigeonpenelope.bsky.social · 19/09/2025
This isn’t up for debate but Jimmy Kimmel is the funniest talk show host. This whole thing is wild.
010
Nicola @pigeonpenelope.bsky.social · 14/08/2025
I just had a fat rat run up to me and say hi when I was sitting outside on my patio.
media.tenor.com
a man with long hair and a beard is holding a glass with the words huh you want what written below him
Alt: a man with long hair and a beard is holding a glass with the words huh you want what written below him
010
Nicola @pigeonpenelope.bsky.social · 30/07/2025
But seriously, what the ever living fuck did you guys think you were doing microsoft? microsoft.com @developer.microsoft.com?! Oh and One Note tabs are vertical and not horizontal and I can’t fix that either. I’m so big mad right now.
microsoft.com
Microsoft – AI, Cloud, Productivity, Computing, Gaming & Apps
Explore Microsoft products and services and support for your home or business. Shop Microsoft 365, Copilot, Teams, Xbox, Windows, Azure, Surface and more.
001
Nicola @pigeonpenelope.bsky.social · 30/07/2025
Whoever is responsible for @microsoft.com Windows 11—specifically with the task bar settings—know that I hate you so much that I hope your printers never work and your computers crash in the middle of important shit.
000
Reposted by Nicola
Chris ❤️‍🔥🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍⚧️ 🏴 @brutumfulmen.bsky.social · 22/07/2025
I AM SHRIEKING 💀🤣 Forget the statue at City Hall, this guy is the *real* Spirit of Detroit. 🫡
A review for a Little Caesar’s somewhere by Kevin S: 

Stopped into this Little Caesars just trying to get a $6 pizza and ended up in a full on action movie. Just as I grabbed my order, this furious dude barges in yelling about how I cut him off in traffic earlier.
Before I can even respond, he throws a punch but then out of nowhere the guy behind the counter jumps over it like he's been waiting for this moment his whole life and just beats the living hell out of the guy. The guy ran off and the cashier just dusted himself off. I said "are you ok man" and he looked me dead in the eye and said "B*tch, this is Little Caesars. We always hot and ready."
Five stars. Will absolutely return.
710481438615
Reposted by Nicola
Bert’s Books @bertsbooks.bsky.social · 23/07/2025
Wednesday is with us again, so grab your family and friends and drag them out to buy a book! - Michael
Maybe it’s not too late to learn how to love and forget how to hate. - Ozzy Osbourne
155197213404
Reposted by Nicola
Ava Laugh… 🤭 @avalaugh.bsky.social · 23/07/2025
Now this is one cleaver little prairie dog.. Wait for it…. 😂🤣
484133042106
Nicola @pigeonpenelope.bsky.social · 23/07/2025
All I did was make jiffy pop and my delayed-pressure urticaria flared up. I’m allergic to pressure. I gripped the wire handle of the jiffy pop package only for a couple of minutes last night. I’m so much pain for it this morning.
010
Nicola @pigeonpenelope.bsky.social · 22/07/2025
I hate that having an ED means I have to unfollow people I like because they’re talking about dieting and weight loss.
010
Nicola @pigeonpenelope.bsky.social · 17/07/2025
My dad was medically gaslit for 40 years—to the point where some of my family members stopped believing him—and he was recently diagnosed with stage 4 fibromyalgia. Up until very recently, my dad’s medical came through the military and the VA. They don’t care. They only pacify.
010
Nicola @pigeonpenelope.bsky.social · 09/07/2025
I don’t know who needs to hear this but you can’t get diabetes by eating an abundance of sugar. Type 2 is genetic and not caused by weight.
000
Nicola @pigeonpenelope.bsky.social · 17/06/2025
Met the bestest dog ever at the salon yesterday. He gives cuddles while we get our hair rinsed/washed.
A man in a chair getting hair washed in a sink. There’s a medium tan dog laying on top of him. A tan dog sitting in a chair.
030
Nicola @pigeonpenelope.bsky.social · 15/06/2025
Nail polish on guys is hot. Mustaches aren’t.
010
Nicola @pigeonpenelope.bsky.social · 05/06/2025
I got a Switch 2 today. Guess what I’m doing after work?!
000
Nicola @pigeonpenelope.bsky.social · 05/06/2025
It’s the anniversary of Reagan’s death. Good. Fuck him.
000
Nicola @pigeonpenelope.bsky.social · 17/05/2025
I just won the Plasma Deck with red stake in Balatro. That’s how my Saturday is going.
media.tenor.com
a man with glasses and a mustache is wearing a white shirt and says yes .
Alt: a man with glasses and a mustache is wearing a white shirt and says yes .
000
Nicola @pigeonpenelope.bsky.social · 12/05/2025
This is a reminder that a donut for breakfast is better than nothing at all.
110
Nicola @pigeonpenelope.bsky.social · 11/05/2025
In “getting older sucks news,” learned today that BOTH parents have cataracts. I don’t wanna.
010
Nicola @pigeonpenelope.bsky.social · 26/04/2025
TikTok comments that “violated community guidelines” Restored Edition
Content restored notice.

TikTok comment says, “dude is unhinged. It’s a charger”
000
Nicola @pigeonpenelope.bsky.social · 26/04/2025
TikTok comments that “violated community guidelines” Restored Edition
Content restored notice. 

TikTok comment that says, “dim sum plus many restaurants with an American menu and one with the very authentic stuff.”
000
Nicola @pigeonpenelope.bsky.social · 26/04/2025
TikTok comments that “violated community guidelines”
TikTok comment that says, “that makes sense. Turkeys are being turkeys. Dog isnt threatened”
000
Nicola @pigeonpenelope.bsky.social · 26/04/2025
TikTok comments that “violated community guidelines”
TikTok comment that says, “using that type of language to describe ppl is so dangerous. Meanwhile, cis het males are the biggest predators.”
000
Nicola @pigeonpenelope.bsky.social · 26/04/2025
TikTok comments that “violated community guidelines”
TikTok comment that says, “I’m just here to help you get some more from the fund so that something nice comes from such a deplorable human.”
000
Nicola @pigeonpenelope.bsky.social · 29/03/2025
So much joy.
media.tenor.com
a colorful bird is standing on a black surface .
Alt: a colorful bird is standing on a black surface .
000
Nicola @pigeonpenelope.bsky.social · 29/03/2025
That second episode of Studio was pretty fucking brilliant.
media.tenor.com
the sun is setting behind a mountain and a purple sky
Alt: the sun is setting behind a mountain and a purple sky
000
Nicola @pigeonpenelope.bsky.social · 28/02/2025
Never, in my wildest dreams, would I think there would be a “scrub daddy” following on TikTok. It’s a scrubber. 🤷🏼‍♀️
000
Nicola @pigeonpenelope.bsky.social · 12/02/2025
I once commented on a TikTok video about raw milk, that ultra pasteurized milk lasts longer. Then some dude commented “physique check?” It’s been months but that comment still pisses me off.
000
Nicola @pigeonpenelope.bsky.social · 01/02/2025
I’m finally reading Good Omens and I see why my bestie loves it. It’s hilarious af.
040
Nicola @pigeonpenelope.bsky.social · 24/01/2025
My husband and I have been re-watching Lost. I actually like it more now than I did when it first aired. I think I have more patience for the pace. The creepy part about Lost is that John Locke looks a ton like my dad did when it aired. The body shape, the clothes, the face, and the stubbornness.
media.tenor.com
a bald man talking to a woman with the words this is not a democracy
Alt: a bald man talking to a woman with the words this is not a democracy. This is a gif from the tv show, “Lost.” The bald man is John Locke and the woman is Kate.
030
Nicola @pigeonpenelope.bsky.social · 08/01/2025
I might look old but I’m still that teenager that giggles to Beavis and Butthead.
media.tenor.com
two cartoon characters standing next to each other with the words " we 're old " written on the bottom
Alt: two cartoon characters, Beavis and Butthead, standing next to each other with the words " we 're old " written on the bottom
000
Nicola @pigeonpenelope.bsky.social · 01/01/2025
This year kinda sucked and I’m not looking forward to next year.
010
Nicola @pigeonpenelope.bsky.social · 24/12/2024
Gender reveal parties for babies are so weird because it’s just telling ppl what private parts the kid has.
000
Nicola @pigeonpenelope.bsky.social · 23/12/2024
The price of eggs these days… I get it but I don’t like it.
media.tenor.com
three men are sitting at a table and one of them is wearing a chicago t-shirt
Alt: three men are sitting at a table and one of them is wearing a chicago t-shirt. He’s leaving back as if in utter annoyance of something. The text over top the gif says BOOOO!
010
Nicola @pigeonpenelope.bsky.social · 21/12/2024
If you’re making videos and announcing all the “giving tree” gifts you donated… this wasn’t generosity or charity. This is you fluffing your ego and possibly making money from the vids.
000
Nicola @pigeonpenelope.bsky.social · 11/12/2024
This is so amazing. I’m very glad to see we’ve reached the point of curing HIV in some patients. I hope we continue improving the outcomes.
100
Reposted by Nicola
The Onion @theonion.com · 11/12/2024
Congress Threatens To Leave D.C. Unless New Capitol Is Built theonion.com/congress-thr...
Congress Threatens To Leave D.C. Unless New Capitol Is Built

-The Onion
934811302
Nicola @pigeonpenelope.bsky.social · 11/12/2024
Also, Rupert Murdoch’s request to have one of his right wing kids be the Fox CEO and so it’s likely going into the hands of his left wing kids and I’m here for that. 🤗
000