phishytacos.bsky.social @phishytacos.bsky.social · 14/04/2026If I was a surgeon in one of those like 10 hour surgeries where you can't stop to pee I would simply be pissing into a catheter the entire time, optimal performance 010
phishytacos.bsky.social @phishytacos.bsky.social · 19/02/2026Northern Sugar Daddy: 'ello, son, do you want me t'pay for chippy tonight? 001
phishytacos.bsky.social @phishytacos.bsky.social · 19/02/2026Northern Sugar Daddy: 'ello, son, do you want me t'pay for chippy tonight? 000
phishytacos.bsky.social @phishytacos.bsky.social · 21/01/2026Australian life coach: "Listen mate, we're all on our separate journeys in this cunt we call loife" 000
phishytacos.bsky.social @phishytacos.bsky.social · 22/12/2025Portrait of my boyfriend as a gum machine in his primary school play 010
phishytacos.bsky.social @phishytacos.bsky.social · 22/12/2025Dyslexic Hitchcock be like: "Dial...M? For Murder!" 000
phishytacos.bsky.social @phishytacos.bsky.social · 21/12/2025Christmas pints with the boys and walking home, friend is blasting Hamilton from his phone. That's not on is it pal 000
phishytacos.bsky.social @phishytacos.bsky.social · 19/12/2025I despise patient confidentiality solely because there are so many funny names and I gotta keep that to myself 000
phishytacos.bsky.social @phishytacos.bsky.social · 12/11/2025Favourite type of Spotify playlist has to be: "[music genre] playlist" 😄 and right below it: "ACTUAL [music genre] playlist" 😐🖕 000
phishytacos.bsky.social @phishytacos.bsky.social · 12/11/2025Just saw an Instagram comment claiming Columbus was Jewish (that's why he was evil), that's my fault for scrolling at 2am People really just say anything now 010
phishytacos.bsky.social @phishytacos.bsky.social · 07/11/2025JUNGLE IS MASSIVE!!! JUNGLE IS LARGE!!! JUNGLE IS AVERAGE!!! JUNGLE IS RE-EVALUATING SOME ISSUES AROUND SELF-PERCEPTION AND THE WIDER CULTURE!!! 000
phishytacos.bsky.social @phishytacos.bsky.social · 12/09/2025Great moment last night in which boyfriend said "how long does a shot last on hells kitchen" and we began counting manically in unison the shot lengths and it devolved into just yelling "1, 1, 1...2!!! 1, 1" 020
phishytacos.bsky.social @phishytacos.bsky.social · 12/09/2025If I was Charlie Kirk I simply wouldn't have allowed that to happen to me 000
phishytacos.bsky.social @phishytacos.bsky.social · 11/09/2025I don't think anyone else is saying it but I think it's really selfish of Charlie Kirk to die just before 9/11 - way to steal attention away from an important anniversary 010
phishytacos.bsky.social @phishytacos.bsky.social · 09/09/20255 is the only odd number I trust implicitly 100
phishytacos.bsky.social @phishytacos.bsky.social · 04/09/2025There's a monkey man in Llandudno The Llandudno Monkey Man 000
phishytacos.bsky.social @phishytacos.bsky.social · 01/09/2025Long covid but it's wide covid and it just makes you wide 010
phishytacos.bsky.social @phishytacos.bsky.social · 01/09/2025Nothing makes you lose the will to live faster than receiving a notification to say your payment for Microsoft 365 has gone out 000
phishytacos.bsky.social @phishytacos.bsky.social · 29/08/2025I painted the mona Lisa Just so da vinki thought I was cool 000
phishytacos.bsky.social @phishytacos.bsky.social · 25/08/2025Every Hells Kitchen: Narrator: "Bingus is the only one holding his team together" *Bingus looking sweatingly determined over a grill* Narrator: "Bingus has made an unrepairable mistake - Chef Ramsey has punished his team accordingly by splashing them all with hot burning oil" 100
phishytacos.bsky.social @phishytacos.bsky.social · 22/08/2025Potential wedding speech idea: Hire a hype man just to yell really loudly through a mic "THIS AINT YOUR MOMMAS WEDDING SPEECH" Also hold for applause, laughter, hooting, and hollering after every sentence 000
phishytacos.bsky.social @phishytacos.bsky.social · 21/08/2025Travelling back in time to stop Ryan Murphy from ever making Evan Peters wear the 'Normal People Scare Me' shirt 000
phishytacos.bsky.social @phishytacos.bsky.social · 19/08/2025Okay but what if Trump had said "grab him by the pussy" is this anything? 000
phishytacos.bsky.social @phishytacos.bsky.social · 10/08/2025Being properly medicated and getting really into Linkin Park in a way that's not a cry for help 000
phishytacos.bsky.social @phishytacos.bsky.social · 21/07/2025I think there should be a dentist who has nothing but big gold teeth and he just smiles a big gold smile over you whilst he operates 010
Reposted by @phishytacos.bsky.socialGareth Watkins @garethwatkins.bsky.social · 11/07/2025"get together and cry with the boys (sexual)" 092
phishytacos.bsky.social @phishytacos.bsky.social · 01/07/2025Gay Rock Station: "Gay Rock 98 FM, cumming at ya, one nation under COCK" ~eagle cry~lightning bolt~guitar riff~male moaning~ 🦅⚡🎸😩 010
phishytacos.bsky.social @phishytacos.bsky.social · 29/06/2025Foreign Affairs correspondent trying to break down the news to kids: "Israel has been acting really BRAT towards Iran. Or the other way around, whichever, both are BRAT" 100
phishytacos.bsky.social @phishytacos.bsky.social · 10/06/2025Guess who's gonna make employee of the month down the Asian creampie factory 000
phishytacos.bsky.social @phishytacos.bsky.social · 10/06/2025Must've been depressing being a pirate, all that rum to drink and coke isn't invented for like 300 more years 100
phishytacos.bsky.social @phishytacos.bsky.social · 16/05/2025Today's major misreading: Freshly baked jacket potatoes with your choke of fillings 000
phishytacos.bsky.social @phishytacos.bsky.social · 06/05/2025Kind of fucked up that for the red carpet of Kung Fu Panda, DreamWorks put jack black there in a tuxedo but with yellow face 000
phishytacos.bsky.social @phishytacos.bsky.social · 01/05/2025The rule to parliamentary democracy and subsequent local council elections is 1) get high 2) vote for the least bad candidate 3) go pub 4) ??? 5) gay sex 120
phishytacos.bsky.social @phishytacos.bsky.social · 29/04/2025Weird to see RFK demonise autistic people as if the biggest health problem in America is people who are just a little too into trains 010
phishytacos.bsky.social @phishytacos.bsky.social · 10/04/2025Dubai Chocolate? You mean Fruit and Nut? 110
phishytacos.bsky.social @phishytacos.bsky.social · 06/04/2025"split the G, you've got to split the G!!!" How about I split your empty skull open, how about that shithead? Oh look it's empty inside, BUT I ALREADY KNEW THAT EVERYBODY KNOWS THAT 100
phishytacos.bsky.social @phishytacos.bsky.social · 31/03/2025Call me John Wilkes Booth the way I wanna unload into Abraham Twink-oln 100
phishytacos.bsky.social @phishytacos.bsky.social · 24/03/2025I think apart from being attracted to men, the gayest thing about me is when I was inconsolable after ordering two bottles of Sainsbury's pudding wine to cheer myself up during a quarantined birthday and they were replaced with regular white wine. I had nothing to live for 010
phishytacos.bsky.social @phishytacos.bsky.social · 24/03/2025Some words are unpleasant to write out by hand. Quarters for example, fuck quarters 000
phishytacos.bsky.social @phishytacos.bsky.social · 20/03/2025Recently saw the interior of a cheesecake factory, I'm really taken aback by its beauty. Why did the Big Bang Theory portray it so drably? 000
Reposted by @phishytacos.bsky.socialnattie winters @utilitylimb.bsky.social · 19/03/2025foolish to buy a tesla. for that price you could buy thousands of beautiful gems for monta. 91710173
Reposted by @phishytacos.bsky.socialOwen Jones @owenjones.bsky.social · 19/03/2025In every atrocity in history, the silent are always principal players. Those who remain silent over Israel's genocide are enabling it to continue. Their cowardice is paid in the blood of thousands of innocent Palestinians. New column 👇 www.theguardian.com/commentisfre...theguardian.comImagine if all those who are silent about the terrible evil being committed in Gaza spoke up | Owen JonesNo crime in history has been so well documented by its victims. And yet inaction and censorship reign, says Guardian columnist Owen Jones 25688310
phishytacos.bsky.social @phishytacos.bsky.social · 18/03/2025Now that John Cena has become the heel I think he should rescind his previous comments about Bin Laden and actually start delivering Al-Qaeda apologia in the ring 000
phishytacos.bsky.social @phishytacos.bsky.social · 18/03/2025What if Hitler was exactly the same except he liked reggae. What then, liberal? 110
phishytacos.bsky.social @phishytacos.bsky.social · 18/03/2025My five year plan? You mean the thing that starved the peasants? 000
phishytacos.bsky.social @phishytacos.bsky.social · 17/03/2025Honesty is the best policy, unless of course better policies are available, such as lying 000
phishytacos.bsky.social @phishytacos.bsky.social · 13/03/2025Feeling like a fat catastrophe bc I was actively eating chocolate during a guided meditation "Inhale through the nose and then exhale through your mouth, which is bulging with chocolate" 000
phishytacos.bsky.social @phishytacos.bsky.social · 12/03/2025Working hard at the monster to monster piss factory turning monster into monster piss 010
phishytacos.bsky.social @phishytacos.bsky.social · 11/03/2025My life is just like the movie The Substance except instead of a youthful beauty formula it's just regular substances 000
