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Patrick Crerand

@patrickcrerand.bsky.social
501 followers 550 following 31 posts

“Built for comfort, not for speed.” Writer, teacher, Director of DeSales MFA Program. Not the Man Utd player, but I wrote about our shared name here: xn--wgiaa.ws/3-united-a-story-by-pa…

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Patrick Crerand @patrickcrerand.bsky.social · 05/12/2025
Happy to be in this issue of Ninth Letter with so many other great writers!
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Patrick Crerand @patrickcrerand.bsky.social · 15/09/2025
But think of the necklaces, Dave! The necklaces!
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Patrick Crerand @patrickcrerand.bsky.social · 06/09/2025
We’ve entered Late Stage Fudruckerization.
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Patrick Crerand @patrickcrerand.bsky.social · 28/08/2025
His head looks like a jiffy pop if you lost power halfway through cooking it.
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Patrick Crerand @patrickcrerand.bsky.social · 20/08/2025
This article reads like a Pynchon novel. Every paragraph is a gem. Waiting for RFK to replace flu shots with Ferelala powder. “Take the Shame off me!” www.nytimes.com/2025/08/20/w...
nytimes.com
‘Natural’ Sex Drugs Are a Spreading Health Risk in West Africa
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Patrick Crerand @patrickcrerand.bsky.social · 11/08/2025
Thanks to @barrelhouse.bsky.social for the nod here! Happy to be part of such a great group of writers!
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Patrick Crerand @patrickcrerand.bsky.social · 18/07/2025
He said “Fidelio” twice.
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Patrick Crerand @patrickcrerand.bsky.social · 29/05/2025
One of Digital Day’s storylines is he needs max booster bonus bux to keep his beard from going grey. If he doesn’t get enough in time, a magic NCAA inspector comes down from Indy and turns him into Urban Meyer. Same for Holtz but it’s all Chivas Regal based incentives.
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Patrick Crerand @patrickcrerand.bsky.social · 23/05/2025
Feels like a paper where its style guide contains an allowance for no more than two “yous” per column.
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Patrick Crerand @patrickcrerand.bsky.social · 20/05/2025
So thrilled to be in this issue of @barrelhouse.bsky.social again. Never thought Alito would be a source of inspiration but great art comes from low places sometimes! Check it out!
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Patrick Crerand @patrickcrerand.bsky.social · 20/05/2025
Yellow Spudmarine
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Patrick Crerand @patrickcrerand.bsky.social · 10/05/2025
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Patrick Crerand @patrickcrerand.bsky.social · 08/05/2025
Ope Pope
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Patrick Crerand @patrickcrerand.bsky.social · 08/05/2025
Hoping to see Pope Brynlee I.
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Patrick Crerand @patrickcrerand.bsky.social · 17/04/2025
Have a couple of flash fictions in @mrbullbull.bsky.social. My thanks to them for publishing these two!
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Patrick Crerand @patrickcrerand.bsky.social · 03/04/2025
He ate all the paste in school.
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Patrick Crerand @patrickcrerand.bsky.social · 01/04/2025
What could go wrong?
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Patrick Crerand @patrickcrerand.bsky.social · 01/04/2025
Looking forward to the new book! Would it be possible to contact you about an opportunity to speak with my MFA students who'll be in Scotland in July? Let me know and thanks.
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Patrick Crerand @patrickcrerand.bsky.social · 29/03/2025
Better than the Liver King.
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Patrick Crerand @patrickcrerand.bsky.social · 14/03/2025
It’s literally Robert E. Lee’s land seized during that war for his treason.
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Patrick Crerand @patrickcrerand.bsky.social · 26/02/2025
End of your glasses in your mouth as well?
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Reposted by Patrick Crerand
Dave Housley @housleydave.bsky.social · 22/02/2025
The program is set for the @barrelhouse.bsky.social conference in DC on 4/12/25 and there's something for everyone: craft workshops & panels on fiction, nonfiction, poetry, publishing, writing life (and how to manage it in All This Bullshit). Hope to see you there! www.barrelhousemag.com/conference
barrelhousemag.com
The Barrelhouse Conference: Conversations and Connections, Practical Advice on Writing — Barrelhouse
Conversations and Connections is a one-day conference organized by Barrelhouse in person at American University in Washington, DC on April 12, 2025.
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Patrick Crerand @patrickcrerand.bsky.social · 20/02/2025
Did that asteroid rent a billboard?
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Patrick Crerand @patrickcrerand.bsky.social · 14/02/2025
Now that we’ve elected McTeague to our highest office, I’m here for all the whale news and wondering when the leviathan will swallow us. It can’t come too soon now!
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Reposted by Patrick Crerand
Patrick Rapa @classypatrick.bsky.social · 10/02/2025
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Patrick Crerand @patrickcrerand.bsky.social · 09/02/2025
A good one from Louis Jenkins. www.poetryfoundation.org/poems/53694/...
poetryfoundation.org
Football
This isn't a football, it's a shoe, a man's brown leather oxford. I have eaten pancakes, for instance, with that clear corn syrup on them because there was no maple syrup and they weren't very good.
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Patrick Crerand @patrickcrerand.bsky.social · 03/02/2025
Have a new essay on here about Haydn, Joplin and failing at piano lessons when I was seven. Great issue.
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Reposted by Patrick Crerand
Mike Luckovich @mluckovich.bsky.social · 29/01/2025
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Patrick Crerand @patrickcrerand.bsky.social · 21/01/2025
How about them Buckeyes!
The greatest college mascot ever, Brutus Buckeye, an anthropomorphic tree nut.
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Patrick Crerand @patrickcrerand.bsky.social · 25/12/2024
From Cheever’s “Christmas Is a Sad Season for the Poor.” Great story.
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Patrick Crerand @patrickcrerand.bsky.social · 13/12/2024
Here’s a story I wrote for McSweeney’s a while ago, reprinted here: www.salon.com/2010/07/15/p...
salon.com
Short story: "The Glory of Keys"
How Brian Sullivan's Pontiac Sunfire became the coolest new student at Brookhaven High School
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Patrick Crerand @patrickcrerand.bsky.social · 11/12/2024
When we get to the McTeague inspired vigilantes, then we’re in real trouble.
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Patrick Crerand @patrickcrerand.bsky.social · 03/12/2024
I’ve not been working out my whole life for this shot at making no shots whatsoever.
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Patrick Crerand @patrickcrerand.bsky.social · 16/11/2024
Watching those old Tyson highlights, I think about how amazing it was when Buster Douglas beat Tyson. I worked with his brother later on at St. Stephen’s Community Center in Linden and sometimes he’d wear the championship ring to work because he helped train Buster.
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