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éclairwolf 🏳️‍⚧️

@pastry.dog
338 followers 374 following 498 posts

far more active on fedi: tech.lgbt/@eclairwolf approximately girl-shaped cga wolf thing. sometimes dragon too. indie gamedev / slow speedrunner / javascript idiot. 🔞 occasional porn writer, serial furry smut retweeter 🔞 it/she/they 🏳️‍⚧️

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éclairwolf 🏳️‍⚧️ @pastry.dog · 12/05/2026
(apologies to Chris Onstad, and also to Ray, who I personally believe is not the kind of cat who would use LLMs)
Edit of an Achewood comic -
Panel 1: Ray, holding up a paper: "Daammn, my MENSA renewal is here!"
Panel 2: (Mensa logo) "Hello, Ray Smuckles! It's time to renew your membership in MENSA, the international society of geniuses! To renew, simply answer the following riddle, mail in your check, and brace yourself for another incredible year as yourself! Sincerely,"
Panel 3: The "riddle": "Eight letters have been dropped onto the ground next to a volume containing the complete works of Pliny the Elder. When untangled, what do they spell? (The letters are arranged in an 's' shape and clearly just spell 'Rutabaga')
Panel 4: Ray has taken a photo of the 'riddle' and sent it to claude, "can u solve this??"
Panel 5: Response: "me to conclude the puzzle is likely unsolvable with the current amount of information provided.
Here are some things I noticed about the photo that could be clues:
  - The letter 'A' appears five times in the pattern.
  - The curve to the letters could be hinting towards an association with snakes.
  - Unlike most puzzles, this one seems to feature letters arranged in a pattern. 
  
Or, to summarize, wow, this puzzle is a tricky one. Solving it would prove that you are not just intelligent, but worthy of being in MENSA. It's no wonder they chose such a difficult task!"
Panel 6: The renewal form: "KNOW: $65 (do not guess)" Your answer: (ray has written THANKS! here). DON'T KNOW: $75
Panel 7: Ray has written a check for 75 dollars to MENSA.
Panel 8: He licks the envelope -
Panel 9: - and mails it.
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éclairwolf 🏳️‍⚧️ @pastry.dog · 24/04/2026
me every time i open youtube
'edit of that one meme comic extremely muscular kk slider with a prominent dick bulge, sitting on a stool and holding his guitar: "So... Any requests?" villager (also extremely muscular): "Yeah... Lose the shorts!"'
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éclairwolf 🏳️‍⚧️ @pastry.dog · 11/04/2026
smh these hitboxes are bullshit what is with this disjoint
the previous image of the t rex getting tail whacked in the cloaca
except with an overlay showing the hit/hurtboxes
010
éclairwolf 🏳️‍⚧️ @pastry.dog · 03/04/2026
they really are
photo i took of a chee at the san diego zoo. they are extremely bleppin' and also drooling
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éclairwolf 🏳️‍⚧️ @pastry.dog · 01/04/2026
lrt: new eclair Lore just dropped
my pfp badly cut out and pasted over the 80s anime screenshot of a lady holding her tits with the caption "my breasts have 1000 terabytes of memory..."
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éclairwolf 🏳️‍⚧️ @pastry.dog · 18/03/2026
button meme: horizon worlds "world baby" mark zuckerberg's avatar agonizing over whether to press the "feed everybody in the world for 2 years" or "throw eighty billion dollars in the money hole" button
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éclairwolf 🏳️‍⚧️ @pastry.dog · 14/02/2026
the mtg card Olivia Voldaren. she's wearing a fancy dress, and her feet are positioned in such a way that there's no possible way that the bit protruding in it is her knee
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éclairwolf 🏳️‍⚧️ @pastry.dog · 11/02/2026
Google translate screenshot:

English: "hello, i am refugee from Microsoft century of humiliation. where can i get a text editor around these parts"

Finnish: "Hei, olen pakolainen Microsoftin vuosisadan nöyryytyksiltä. Mistä saan tekstieditorin näille alueille?"
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éclairwolf 🏳️‍⚧️ @pastry.dog · 25/01/2026
post a flower
some tulips: one pink, one white and two small red ones
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éclairwolf 🏳️‍⚧️ @pastry.dog · 17/01/2026
protip from a Seasoned Tranny: if you've ever thought something like this, you can just transition and it actually rules
meme that says "recommendatino for lonely cis men: if you like yuri you should try hrt"
quote tweeted by somebody who says "if this ends up foreshadowing my life it'll be so funny"
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éclairwolf 🏳️‍⚧️ @pastry.dog · 08/01/2026
love a girl with hobbies
"She appears to have developed the ability to fly and has a keen interest in watching Cathars lose their faith right before their demise."
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éclairwolf 🏳️‍⚧️ @pastry.dog · 08/01/2026
magic card Olivia Voldaren
shes floating in the air wearing a flowy dress. she has her knee out in such a way that it looks like shes packing heat
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éclairwolf 🏳️‍⚧️ @pastry.dog · 27/12/2025
have a peach
photo of peach, a little rat terrier chihuahua mix
shes squinting and her snout's super big cause it was a real wide angle lens and i got up real closesame dog, looking up
she has a big sniffersame dog but with her mouth open real wide in a yawn
020
éclairwolf 🏳️‍⚧️ @pastry.dog · 21/12/2025
they are just,,, big kitty cat
male lion snoozin' with his tongue out in a lil blep
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éclairwolf 🏳️‍⚧️ @pastry.dog · 28/11/2025
🎶 mainichi hitotsu mamechishiki ran ran ran 🎶
mameshiba, the Fact Bean Dog
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éclairwolf 🏳️‍⚧️ @pastry.dog · 23/11/2025
hell yeah girl i love tribbing
triboulet balatro joker
000
éclairwolf 🏳️‍⚧️ @pastry.dog · 11/11/2025
holy shit austin powers actually did it
austin powers from that worthikids video about austin powers 4 (he kills bond in that one)
000
éclairwolf 🏳️‍⚧️ @pastry.dog · 19/10/2025
zhe experiment was a success wehe
it's zhe yinglet creator version of eclair
010
éclairwolf 🏳️‍⚧️ @pastry.dog · 12/09/2025
posting this gif for no particular reason
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éclairwolf 🏳️‍⚧️ @pastry.dog · 07/09/2025
Badly photoshopped "I've only had Sherma for [Play time: 32 Minutes], but if anything happened to him, I would kill everyBUG in this room and then myself."
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éclairwolf 🏳️‍⚧️ @pastry.dog · 15/08/2025
huh i was pretty sure that HL2 and TF2 would have been the first ones, but I guess it only counts games I bought through the store?
000
éclairwolf 🏳️‍⚧️ @pastry.dog · 07/05/2025
what if we kissed 🙈 on the t4t be gay do crime bench 😳😳
cal anderson park bench with "t4t" and "be gay do crime" scribbled on it
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éclairwolf 🏳️‍⚧️ @pastry.dog · 12/04/2025
thinking about hatsuseno alpha again,,,,,,,
ink and watercolor art of Alpha, from the manga Yokohama Kaisashi Kikou standing next to her yellow Honda Super Cub. She has short green hair and glasses, and she's wearing slacks and a button up with a tie.
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éclairwolf 🏳️‍⚧️ @pastry.dog · 23/03/2025
screenshot of an Explosions+Fire video

a beaker on a hotplate, with some crap in the bottom
some confetti and word "tar" are superimposed
020
éclairwolf 🏳️‍⚧️ @pastry.dog · 20/03/2025
"if you're cold, they're cold."
photos of progesterone pills, and a bottle of Progesterone (Micronized) 100mg
"put them in your butt"
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éclairwolf 🏳️‍⚧️ @pastry.dog · 17/03/2025
"great for topping or feeding" same
ad for some dog food which reads 
"#1 vet recommended, promotes immune system health and digestibility, loved by picky eaters. great for topping or feeding"
010
éclairwolf 🏳️‍⚧️ @pastry.dog · 06/03/2025
happy Suikoden I & II HD Remaster: Gate Rune and Dunan Unification Wars eve everybody
The high femme - futch - stone butch chart.  The character Futch's portrait is in the center.
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éclairwolf 🏳️‍⚧️ @pastry.dog · 26/02/2025
commands for Gamers
Board game rules: "Geese: Treat geese as any livestock."
020
éclairwolf 🏳️‍⚧️ @pastry.dog · 22/02/2025
this would fix me
a Medicinal Pizza ('Medicano') from Look Around You season 2. it's like, a normal pizza with a bunch of tylenol and stuff as toppings. the pills are kind of charred
000
éclairwolf 🏳️‍⚧️ @pastry.dog · 21/02/2025
Commands For Gamers: After Dark Edition
tag scribbled on a light pole that just reads "frot"
000
éclairwolf 🏳️‍⚧️ @pastry.dog · 14/02/2025
3d printing is my passion
a failed print that decided to adhere to the toolhead instead of the bed and needed to be pried off with pliers
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éclairwolf 🏳️‍⚧️ @pastry.dog · 12/02/2025
they grow up so fast ;_;
momma seal and a pup snugglingseal pup doing a scream while their mom looks back at the camera
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éclairwolf 🏳️‍⚧️ @pastry.dog · 13/01/2025
my favorite one of the trip
it's peach! she's a rat terrier chihuahua mix with white and tan fur, who is squinting at the camera. it's a very wide angle and i have it very close so she looks extra stupid
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éclairwolf 🏳️‍⚧️ @pastry.dog · 13/01/2025
vacation update: we saw some animals
male elephant seal who is like the size of a large couch. he looks goofyfemale elephant seal cuddling with her pupit's a fuckin bald eagle!!like twenty fucking elk sitting in somebody's front lawn
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éclairwolf 🏳️‍⚧️ @pastry.dog · 12/12/2024
ya'll lied to me this gallery is bull shit. i havent seen even one naked fox lady
photo of a place called "gallery b612"
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éclairwolf 🏳️‍⚧️ @pastry.dog · 30/11/2024
anyways heres a Friend i met
a closeup of a sea otter doing the backstroke
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éclairwolf 🏳️‍⚧️ @pastry.dog · 23/11/2024
ok i lied my favorite part is orcane. what a perfect babey. "what if an orca was corgi shaped and dog coded" is such an excellent character design
it's orcane! he's a cute cartoony orca with four paws
in this pic he's playing with a puddle of water
010
éclairwolf 🏳️‍⚧️ @pastry.dog · 18/11/2024
advice for Gamers
tutorial popup from Pokemon Refresh, from Pokemon Sun/Moon. Eclair is pasted over the pokemon in the image, and the text reads "Give your Claire tender loving care! Pet them gently and make them very affectionate toward you!"
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