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Ti(m)ramisu

@nurderofc.bsky.social
88 followers 279 following 156 posts

Kickers. Tiramisu. Caps.

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Ti(m)ramisu @nurderofc.bsky.social · 28/09/2026
The announcer will make a clever remark like "And that's why it's called a 'snap', people."
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Ti(m)ramisu @nurderofc.bsky.social · 28/09/2026
In a single move I would blow out both of my knees so badly, they will name a medical condition after me. People will be pouring buckets of ice water over their heads just to raise money to find a cure for my condition (being an unathletic 47-year old man).
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Ti(m)ramisu @nurderofc.bsky.social · 18/09/2026
I saw the funniest DW report about this yesterday, where they casually mention in the middle that under EU law, only European countries are eligible for membership and then just ignore that and keep talking about it like it could happen.
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Ti(m)ramisu @nurderofc.bsky.social · 18/09/2026
Absolutely slanderous to have this hit piece accompanied by a picture of a Eurasian red squirrel. Not only are our squirrels much cuter, they're not terrorist menaces, like yours! 😤
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Ti(m)ramisu @nurderofc.bsky.social · 04/09/2026
Interesting that his work ethic seems to have gone down the toilet the moment he started wearing suits.
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Ti(m)ramisu @nurderofc.bsky.social · 04/09/2026
Went from listening to hip hop to listening to artificial hip hop. 😭
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Ti(m)ramisu @nurderofc.bsky.social · 01/09/2026
The prosecutor reading that book.
static.klipy.com
Tim Robinson: Oh My God, He Admit It!
Alt: Focus Group Man from a sketch from I Think You Should Leave with Tim Robinson saying "Oh My God, He Admit It!"
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Ti(m)ramisu @nurderofc.bsky.social · 27/08/2026
This is how I learn that missinteenusa is NOT an account that tracks missing teenagers in the United States. Got it.
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Ti(m)ramisu @nurderofc.bsky.social · 26/08/2026
Tbf, if I had siblings with names like River, Rain, Liberty, and Summer, I would also not be ok just being named 'Steve' or something.
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Ti(m)ramisu @nurderofc.bsky.social · 24/08/2026
Everytime someone shares that Denmark is one of the top countries for self-reported happiness, someone in the comments will point out that they also have "the highest use of anti-depressants", and I just think that sounds like an ad for how great anti-depressants are, more than a dunk.
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Ti(m)ramisu @nurderofc.bsky.social · 23/08/2026
As we say in Germany, "Ein schöner Rücken kann auch entzücken". (A beautiful back can also be enchanting.)
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Ti(m)ramisu @nurderofc.bsky.social · 14/08/2026
Was frankly not prepared for this.
Screenshot from Max Johnson's on the Georgia Southern Football website. It reads: "PERSONAL: Born Maximus Johnson". The name Maximus is underlined in red, because that's frankly a weird fucking name.
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Ti(m)ramisu @nurderofc.bsky.social · 13/08/2026
Miners I'd Like to Find.
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Ti(m)ramisu @nurderofc.bsky.social · 12/08/2026
Fun fact about Canadian lakes: one of them has an island in the middle, that has a lake on it, with an island in the middle.
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Ti(m)ramisu @nurderofc.bsky.social · 10/08/2026
He looks like the unfrozen caveman lawyer from SNL.
Unfrozen caveman lawyer from the eponymous SNL skit.
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Ti(m)ramisu @nurderofc.bsky.social · 05/08/2026
It's interesting no one's ever method acted their way into being a nicer person. I'll believe it's real when someone does it for the Mr. Rogers biopic.
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Ti(m)ramisu @nurderofc.bsky.social · 03/08/2026
In Denmark they have special showings for parents with babies, with the sound turned down. And yes, they did have this for the Odyssey at my local cinema.
Screenshot of an (auto-translated) warning on a cinema website that reads "Baby cinema performance. You have chosen a Baby Cinema performance, which is specially designed for new parents with baby. The sound is subdued, there is dim lighting in the hall, and there is room for prams in the cinema. Have fun to you both!". There's a blue acknowledgment button that reads "It is understood".
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Ti(m)ramisu @nurderofc.bsky.social · 28/07/2026
Every client you take there will have an "oh, when you said 'TED talk' you meant 'TEDx talk'" moment and it will absolutely kill your business.
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Ti(m)ramisu @nurderofc.bsky.social · 28/07/2026
That's a frankly insane caption in an article about an entirely different crime committed by cops.
Photo of a white guy with a black polo shirt and black ball cap with his outstretched open hand towards the camera standing in front of a car with an open trunk. The caption reads "In August 2025, SLED agents charged McBee Police Department Captain Greg Block with obstructing a child sex assault investigation, then becoming involved in a sexual relationship with the woman who reported the assault to law enforcement. (WJZY Photo/Jody Barr)"
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Ti(m)ramisu @nurderofc.bsky.social · 28/07/2026
Why do they specify "active" diarrhea? Are there inactive/passive kinds of diarrhea?
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Ti(m)ramisu @nurderofc.bsky.social · 24/07/2026
I'm wondering what word we would use if it happened to a different guy? Like a Steve or a Bob.
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Ti(m)ramisu @nurderofc.bsky.social · 23/07/2026
*me, briefly blanking on the word "wife"* Is there a...Mrs. Husband?
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Ti(m)ramisu @nurderofc.bsky.social · 21/07/2026
www.politico.com/blogs/politi...
politico.com
Full Transcript: Michigan Democratic Senate candidate Abdul El-Sayed
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Ti(m)ramisu @nurderofc.bsky.social · 21/07/2026
Idk, seems fine.
Screenshot of the mentioned Politico interview.

Dasha Burns: So I talked to, former Congresswoman Marjorie Taylor Greene on this podcast in April, and it’s kinda remarkable how similar some of your positions are. Like she also has condemned AIPAC’s influence in politics, called for no more US taxpayer dollars to Israel, said that the cost of health insurance needs to go down. Do you think you could build this new coalition with people like MTG?

Abdul El-Sayed: Look, she said a lot of things I disagree with, too. I’ll just say this, that I wouldn’t be surprised, right...when you ask me about why the establishment elite Democrats are so worried about me, it’s because there are a lot of people who listen to her who are going to vote for me in the general election. They are not afraid I’m going to lose. They’re afraid I’m going to win. And at the end of the day, we get so polarized about D versus R or red versus blue that we forget that when you talk about the things that people actually care about, you can win elections. You can do that in uncommon ways. But too often, the Democratic Party is more interested in continuing to take money from its corporate and special interest donors than it is in speaking conventional truth.

It should be an obvious thing that everybody agrees with that we should keep our money here. It should be an obvious thing that everybody agrees with that people shouldn’t go into medical debt in the richest, most powerful country in the world. The fact that MTG agrees with those points should not be all that uncommon ‘cause they’re just like obvious things to say. And the fact that neither party is willing to say that is a reflection of the amount of money both parties take from the corporations and the special interests who in effect buy them off to be able to say that.

Look, when you have a public consensus that’s here, right, everybody kinda agrees on one thing, and then a political consensus that’s over here, the difference is usually someb…
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Ti(m)ramisu @nurderofc.bsky.social · 21/07/2026
The whole premise doesn't even make sense. "How do you find love on the one night single people are legally allowed to have sex?" I don't know, do it on literally any other night?
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Ti(m)ramisu @nurderofc.bsky.social · 15/07/2026
Obligatory: CamNewtonWhoTheFuckIsPerna.gif
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Ti(m)ramisu @nurderofc.bsky.social · 09/07/2026
Ryan is only bringing this up because he's very, VERY concerned with "ethics in journalism", a turn of phrase that's definitely never been used to mask someone's thinly veiled misogyny.
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Ti(m)ramisu @nurderofc.bsky.social · 08/07/2026
If by "lately" you mean a decade plus, then yes.
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Ti(m)ramisu @nurderofc.bsky.social · 02/07/2026
The funniest part of this joke is that it's technically correct, but Bosnia and Herzegovina is only one of the countries. The other is Republika Srpska.
Screenshot from the Wikipedia article on Bosnia and Herzegovina stating that "It has several levels of political structuring, according to the Dayton Agreement. The most important of these levels is the division of the country into two confederal entities: the Federation of Bosnia and Herzegovina and Republika Srpska. The Federation of Bosnia and Herzegovina covers 51% of Bosnia and Herzegovina's total area, while Republika Srpska covers 49%."
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Ti(m)ramisu @nurderofc.bsky.social · 30/06/2026
Well, never mind then. The 2020s will be the first decade since the 1930s where Germany doesn't make it to at least one World Cup Final and we all know what happened next...
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Ti(m)ramisu @nurderofc.bsky.social · 30/06/2026
Funny how they're suddenly capable to acknowledge "reporting from another outlet" when it turns out to be wrong.
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Ti(m)ramisu @nurderofc.bsky.social · 30/06/2026
I'm sure what he meant to say was "Daddy's got that dog in him". 😉
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Reposted by Ti(m)ramisu
Tedros Adhanom Ghebreyesus @drtedros.who.int · 25/06/2026
Europe’s heatwave is closing schools & putting people’s health at risk. The data are clear: temperatures across Europe are rising at roughly twice the global average rate, increasing the likelihood & severity of extreme heat in the future. Here are some ways to keep yourself cool: bit.ly/3QxIiY8
bit.ly
Tips for keeping cool
Beat the Heat is a initiative under WHO’s Sport for Health programme, developed in collaboration with FIFA. It aims to protect the health and safety of workers, spectators, and communities by addressi...
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Ti(m)ramisu @nurderofc.bsky.social · 25/06/2026
Poor photoshop of a half star Letterboxd review for Top Gun (1986), where the words "Goose was not valued" from the insane SoftBank presentation are overlaid in place of the actual review.
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Ti(m)ramisu @nurderofc.bsky.social · 24/06/2026
Also, "Messi" is an odd way to spell Maradona.
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Ti(m)ramisu @nurderofc.bsky.social · 24/06/2026
Still not watching the World Cup (because, you know, FIFA sucks!), but here's my prediction anyway. Germany will make the final, but ultimately lose.
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Ti(m)ramisu @nurderofc.bsky.social · 24/06/2026
Yeah, it appears xkcd noticed the same phenomenon, but put it more cleverer. bsky.app/profile/xkcd...
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Ti(m)ramisu @nurderofc.bsky.social · 23/06/2026
"a walking coach". So, like, your parents?
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Ti(m)ramisu @nurderofc.bsky.social · 23/06/2026
Why is every "achievement" nowadays something hyperspecific, like first left-handed male artist born on a Tuesday to achieve a million streams while Mercury is in retrograde" or some shit?
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Ti(m)ramisu @nurderofc.bsky.social · 19/06/2026
Sure, that sounds like a steep price, but you also have to remember that you got absolutely nothing in return, so there.
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Ti(m)ramisu @nurderofc.bsky.social · 17/06/2026
What's funnier to me is that there is one review by a guy with the same deplorable views as Boll who was basically like "I agree with all the racism, but I cannot help you promote this, because it's poorly made."
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Ti(m)ramisu @nurderofc.bsky.social · 17/06/2026
It's not actually banned in Germany, just FYI. They just refused age certification, which makes it less likely any theaters will show it, but it's totally legal to show publicly and sell.
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Ti(m)ramisu @nurderofc.bsky.social · 15/06/2026
Lol at the The Office being considered edgy. What's edgy was the parody of the German office spinoff that was set during the Third Reich, with Adolf Hitler in the Michael Scott/David Brent role.
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Ti(m)ramisu @nurderofc.bsky.social · 12/06/2026
His books have editors and his posts don't and it SHOWS.
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Ti(m)ramisu @nurderofc.bsky.social · 11/06/2026
10-year old me in 1990 memorizing every world cup statistic going back to the first one could also never imagine this. Now this will be third world cup in a row that I'm boycotting. Fuck FIFA for ruining the beautiful game!
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Ti(m)ramisu @nurderofc.bsky.social · 10/06/2026
Was this match actually recorded as properly finished or abandoned?
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Ti(m)ramisu @nurderofc.bsky.social · 10/06/2026
Not even close. The record is 36! www.guinnessworldrecords.com/world-record...
guinnessworldrecords.com
Most red cards in a football match
This record is for the most red cards in a football match.
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Ti(m)ramisu @nurderofc.bsky.social · 09/06/2026
Tintin is as Belgian as french fries...ok, I see now where the confusion might come from.
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Ti(m)ramisu @nurderofc.bsky.social · 09/06/2026
static.klipy.com
I Don'T Know What I Expected - Arrested Development
Alt: Scene from Arrested Development where Michael Bluth (Jason Bateman) finds a paper bag in the fridge labeled "Dead dove. Do not eat." He looks inside the bag, apparently finding said dove and let's out an exasperated "Well, I don't know what I expected."
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Ti(m)ramisu @nurderofc.bsky.social · 04/06/2026
I hate all this new-fangled language. "Large youth gathering". I remember when we used to call it the NBA draft.
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