Natan @natanswiseideas.bsky.social · 27/09/2026It's called pad see ew because when I see it, I eat it ewp 000
Natan @natanswiseideas.bsky.social · 25/09/2026Hogwash. I'm a big big big big businessman, and you ain't fit to work at my firm if you're too lily-livered to wet your whistle at the interview 021
Natan @natanswiseideas.bsky.social · 21/09/2026I have had such little luck with medicines and treatments in my life I'm about to go Steve Jobs mode and eat weeds to balance my humors. Gonna psychically resonate with a mind crystal instead of getting surgery 000
Reposted by NatanNatan @natanswiseideas.bsky.social · 21/07/2026I haven't seen any Zach Cregger movies, but my understanding is some people like them and some people don't. Therefore, I give Zach Cregger a 2.5/5 (fair) 011
Natan @natanswiseideas.bsky.social · 13/09/2026I'm looking after a friend's 2 new kittens and caught them playing cat chess 020
Natan @natanswiseideas.bsky.social · 08/09/2026When I played Ocarina of Time as a kid, I had my older brother get the Sun's Song from the graveyard for me because I was too scared. The remake must include a brother who does the scary parts. 010
Natan @natanswiseideas.bsky.social · 03/09/2026I can't find the words to describe how I uh... How it... Uhhh 1251
Natan @natanswiseideas.bsky.social · 02/09/2026Update: they got too cocky and renamed it Lake Mapquest 021
Natan @natanswiseideas.bsky.social · 24/08/2026I'm glad I clipped this line from Popeye the Sailor Meets Sindbad the Sailor (1936), because I've rewatched it basically every day since and it cheers me up every time 110
Natan @natanswiseideas.bsky.social · 23/08/2026I'm actually kind of pissed off about how agreeable my capo was when I asked to leave the family 000
Natan @natanswiseideas.bsky.social · 14/08/2026A hawk carrying a small bird alighted on a pole right in front of me and started showering me with its prey's feathers. Cool! 110
Natan @natanswiseideas.bsky.social · 10/08/2026DO NOT LISTEN to those other "pickup artists." THIS ONE LINE has a ONE HUNDRED PERCENT success rate. 000
Natan @natanswiseideas.bsky.social · 07/08/2026I only have one rule about prose: If it doesn't rhyme, I'm not interested! 020
Natan @natanswiseideas.bsky.social · 31/07/2026asked to leave the petting zoo for muttering "like moths to a flame..." while feeding goats 010
Natan @natanswiseideas.bsky.social · 29/07/2026There are many kinds of rain out there today, everyone stay safe 010
Natan @natanswiseideas.bsky.social · 28/07/2026If there was a pill that could ease headaches and other pains, but you're not supposed to take more than 2 in 6 hours, would you take it 030
Natan @natanswiseideas.bsky.social · 21/07/2026I haven't seen any Zach Cregger movies, but my understanding is some people like them and some people don't. Therefore, I give Zach Cregger a 2.5/5 (fair) 011
Natan @natanswiseideas.bsky.social · 19/07/2026Argentina is down to 10 men? Sounds like me and my battalion (we're pinned down rn) 110
Natan @natanswiseideas.bsky.social · 10/07/2026Each soccer team picks one guy who has to stand at the goal while everyone else gets to have fun running around. This player is called the Sacrificial Boar 010
Natan @natanswiseideas.bsky.social · 07/07/2026Fired on my first day at Mad Magazine for calling Ringo Starr "Drive-o Car" 010
Natan @natanswiseideas.bsky.social · 04/07/2026I just showed the ghosts of the founding fathers a dog and they started freaking out. I thought they had dogs back then, but I guess not 020
Natan @natanswiseideas.bsky.social · 20/06/2026Met a cat with a wondrous shape named Mooshie who lives in a seed and feed store 230
Natan @natanswiseideas.bsky.social · 12/06/2026I am hearing Elon Musk suddenly became a trillionaire. He must have come up with a really good invention 000
Natan @natanswiseideas.bsky.social · 12/06/2026Oh, I'm "washed?" Like I'm squeaky clean and feeling fresh? Thanks for the compliment. I think we're done here 010
Natan @natanswiseideas.bsky.social · 02/06/2026Attention passengers, this is your captain speaking. Let me think, damn it! I'm trying to figure this out, so just shut up and let me think! 010
Natan @natanswiseideas.bsky.social · 01/06/2026It has been decades since Marlon Brando died, and it's high time we admit he sounded like a cartoon bumblebee!!! 100
Natan @natanswiseideas.bsky.social · 01/06/2026Summertime tip: Leave out a bunch of food and standing water to attract vermin 010
Natan @natanswiseideas.bsky.social · 29/05/2026Got razzed by the other aviators for wearing my goggles on the plane. They said, "What's the matter, flyboy, afraid to feel the sky in your eyes?" I'm never wearing them again 010
Natan @natanswiseideas.bsky.social · 28/05/2026I was like this as a teen until my dad pulled me aside one day and said I should dial it down a bit. Thank you Dad 000
Natan @natanswiseideas.bsky.social · 24/05/2026My mom mentioned she was looking for something to read, so I gave her my copy of Goodbye, Eri like a stick of cartoon dynamite and scampered away 100
Natan @natanswiseideas.bsky.social · 24/05/2026everyone hates and fears my town because it is my lair 020
Natan @natanswiseideas.bsky.social · 22/05/2026"If it's not food, I ain't eating it!" -me when I am told to take my medicine 010
Natan @natanswiseideas.bsky.social · 12/05/2026When Star Wars came out, it completely ruined the Cantina for locals. Every night was packed with tourists hounding the band to play "the Cantina song" as if there's no other music from Tatooine 000
Natan @natanswiseideas.bsky.social · 09/05/2026CAN OUR HERO WITHSTAND THE SLOPPY METER OF... THE RHYMER? 010
Natan @natanswiseideas.bsky.social · 06/05/2026You're probably thinking something like, "I better wear light clothing for this hot desert night." Well, you're a fool 010
Natan @natanswiseideas.bsky.social · 22/04/2026Been trying to solemnly close this dead guy's eyes for like 5 minutes but they're just not closing. I'm swiping his face like crazy but not making any headway 010
Natan @natanswiseideas.bsky.social · 21/04/2026It's counterintuitive, but now the best time to invade the US is the dead of winter 000
Natan @natanswiseideas.bsky.social · 16/04/2026I'm not one of those stupid men who thinks he could beat a lion in a fight or anything, but I do think if I was going to explore the Arctic, I wouldn't have to prepare 100
Natan @natanswiseideas.bsky.social · 15/04/2026WATCH: Comedian HARMS rude heckler Stand-up comedian uses WEAPONS to PIERCE the flesh of disruptive guest 011
Natan @natanswiseideas.bsky.social · 11/04/2026NASA furious as Artemis II crew returns to Earth without any treasure. How dare they show their faces with no treasure at all? They must be keeping it for themselves 010
Natan @natanswiseideas.bsky.social · 11/04/2026Bad news about the Artemis II reentry: It landed on a big spring and boinged right back up into outer space 141
Natan @natanswiseideas.bsky.social · 10/04/2026I've never heard Jesus described as the Prince of Peace before, but it makes sense. Satan is the Prince of Lies, and what's the opposite of lies? Peace 010
Natan @natanswiseideas.bsky.social · 08/04/2026ran an apple under hot water by accident, now I got a hot apple #appletoohot 100
Natan @natanswiseideas.bsky.social · 07/04/2026This is a good message, but unfortunately you and the other Dems have 1 hour to reenact the palace fight scene from RRR or you're not meeting the moment 100
Natan @natanswiseideas.bsky.social · 04/04/2026They're always talking to the astronauts non-stop even though they're already on their way. This is called helicopter parenting, and they're not going to learn self-reliance if they smother them like this 000
