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NASCARCASM @nascarcasm.bsky.social · 29/09/2026

When one of your employees catches you using the office printer to make copies of your résumé

static.klipy.com

Consumer Celluar Brad Keselowski

ALT: Consumer Celluar Brad Keselowski

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NASCARCASM @nascarcasm.bsky.social · 28/09/2026

In the post Preece-fine era the drivers have adopted a shared "I don't know what happened" code. The mafia would be proud of this. NASCAR Omerta.

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NASCARCASM @nascarcasm.bsky.social · 28/09/2026

So Kyle Larson won the race at Kansas Speedway and received several (very fake) texts afterwards. Read them all here -> nascar.substack.com/p/fake-texts...

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NASCARCASM @nascarcasm.bsky.social · 22/09/2026

2025: Larson 2026: Carson Colors inverted

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NASCARCASM @nascarcasm.bsky.social · 20/09/2026

With this win Joey Logano is now NASCAR's all-time leader in celebrating a win while two guys are beating the shit out of each other

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NASCARCASM @nascarcasm.bsky.social · 20/09/2026

So Joey Logano won the race at Bristol Motor Speedway and received several (very fake) texts afterwards. Read them all here -> nascar.substack.com/p/fake-texts...

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NASCARCASM @nascarcasm.bsky.social · 20/09/2026

TEXTBOOK "JERRY SPRINGER" SECOND EFFORT #NASCAR

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NASCARCASM @nascarcasm.bsky.social · 20/09/2026

BRAD PITT LEFT BEFORE FIGHT CLUB STARTED

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NASCARCASM @nascarcasm.bsky.social · 17/09/2026

If you need a refresher on the most memorable fights, arguments and times when things were thrown at a driver at Bristol, we got you covered. CLICK HERE -> nascar.substack.com/p/where-cage...

nascar.substack.com

Where Cages Are Rattled And Tempers Are Lost

A few memorable moments where a drivers’ rage boiled over at the Last Great Colosseum

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NASCARCASM @nascarcasm.bsky.social · 15/09/2026

At this year's pre-season innovation meeting I threw "Like a T-shirt gun but for scorching hot brake fragments" out there and it's just cool to see one of your ideas go from concept to finished product.

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NASCARCASM @nascarcasm.bsky.social · 15/09/2026

A Denver Bronco trying to tackle someone tonight

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NASCARCASM @nascarcasm.bsky.social · 14/09/2026

So Kyle Larson won at WWT Raceway and received several (very fake) texts afterwards. Read them all here -> nascar.substack.com/p/fake-texts...

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NASCARCASM @nascarcasm.bsky.social · 12/09/2026

Until you've heard hundreds of NASCAR fans yell "TIL' THE SWEAT DRIP DOWN MY BALLS" in harmonious unison have you actually lived life

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NASCARCASM @nascarcasm.bsky.social · 08/09/2026

If you're a NASCAR driver in search of a name for your fantasy football team, we've got all sorts of suggestions. Click here -> nascar.substack.com/p/fantasy-fo...

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NASCARCASM @nascarcasm.bsky.social · 07/09/2026

So Christopher Bell won at Darlington and received several (very fake) texts afterwards. Read them all here -> nascar.substack.com/p/fake-texts...

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NASCARCASM @nascarcasm.bsky.social · 05/09/2026

The Lady In Black showing up to work on a 99-degree day

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NASCARCASM @nascarcasm.bsky.social · 03/09/2026

"Napoleon, don't be jealous because I've been chatting online with babes all day."

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NASCARCASM @nascarcasm.bsky.social · 31/08/2026

So Ryan Preece won the Coke Zero Sugar 400 at Daytona and received several (very fake) texts afterwards. Read them all here -> nascar.substack.com/p/fake-texts...

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NASCARCASM @nascarcasm.bsky.social · 30/08/2026

Ryan Preece got airborne again at Daytona

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NASCARCASM @nascarcasm.bsky.social · 27/08/2026

Chris How Carson Buescher's Hocevar shifts sponsor at Richmond 🤝

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NASCARCASM @nascarcasm.bsky.social · 24/08/2026

So Ryan Blaney won at New Hampshire and received several (very fake) texts afterwards. Read them all here on the #NASCAR Substack ➡️ nascar.substack.com/p/fake-texts...

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NASCARCASM @nascarcasm.bsky.social · 23/08/2026

WARNING: THIS IS NOT A ROAD COURSE

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NASCARCASM @nascarcasm.bsky.social · 17/08/2026

So Joey Logano won at Richmond and received several (very fake) texts afterwards. Read them all here -> nascar.substack.com/p/fake-texts...

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NASCARCASM @nascarcasm.bsky.social · 10/08/2026

So Ty Gibbs won at Iowa Speedway and received several (very fake) texts afterwards. Read them all here -> open.substack.com/pub/nascar/p...

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NASCARCASM @nascarcasm.bsky.social · 10/08/2026

Me, the morning in early 2027 when Alex Bowman, despite the contract, just Irish Goodbyes and heads off to a life no longer riddled with abysmal misfortune and hopefully finds harmony

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NASCARCASM @nascarcasm.bsky.social · 10/08/2026

Christopher Bell has finished second to every one of his teammates by a combined margin of around 0.6 seconds. Hold on, researching more stats that Christopher Bell doesn't want to know.

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NASCARCASM @nascarcasm.bsky.social · 08/08/2026

Everyone from NASCAR drivers to MLB catchers to NFL quarterbacks to terrifying clowns have dressed as Ricky Bobby. This and more on the enduring legacy of "Talladega Nights." -> open.substack.com/pub/nascar/p...

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NASCARCASM @nascarcasm.bsky.social · 03/08/2026

Michael McDowell is a self-professed lyrical gangster. So I put him through the Lyrical Gangster Certification Exam. Turns out the guy could battle Eminem. Watch it here -> open.substack.com/pub/nascar/p...

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NASCARCASM @nascarcasm.bsky.social · 27/07/2026

So Corey Heim won the Brickyard 400 and received several (very fake) texts afterwards. Read them all here -> open.substack.com/pub/nascar/p...

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NASCARCASM @nascarcasm.bsky.social · 25/07/2026

I hate being a snitch, but Cole Custer's car for this weekend is nuclear-powered. That's not allowed. People would start getting suspicious when it's the year 2236 and Cole still hasn't pit for fuel.

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NASCARCASM @nascarcasm.bsky.social · 23/07/2026

The folks at the IMS Museum inside Indianapolis Motor Speedway have put together an ahhhhhmazing exhibit on the career of Jeff Gordon that you gotta see if you're in town for the Brickyard 400. Cars. Artifacts. Ricky Funk. Wrote about it here -> open.substack.com/pub/nascar/p...

open.substack.com

The T-Rex, Ricky Funk and everything in between

The Jeff Gordon exhibit at the IMS Museum in Indianapolis is extensive, detailed and an absolute must-see

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NASCARCASM @nascarcasm.bsky.social · 22/07/2026

Me finally talking to my urologist about Peyronie's Disease

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NASCARCASM @nascarcasm.bsky.social · 22/07/2026

After tonight's teeth-rattling Jack White show in Indy, I am officially all in on no-phone shows. Below is the line entering the venue where phones were locked in small bags. There weren't 3,000 people in front of you holding their phones up to take a video they'll mever watch. Religious experience.

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NASCARCASM @nascarcasm.bsky.social · 20/07/2026

Joey Logano won the race at North Wilkesboro Speedway and received several (very fake) texts afterwards. Read them all here -> open.substack.com/pub/nascar/p...

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NASCARCASM @nascarcasm.bsky.social · 17/07/2026

Hired Danhausen to uncurse Connor Zilisch, let's see if it works like it did with the Knicks #NASCAR

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NASCARCASM @nascarcasm.bsky.social · 16/07/2026

2026 is the year of Carson Hocevar. So many Hocevar happening already this season - almost too many to remember. That's why we did our damndest to provide a comprehensive rundown of as many as we could recall. HOCEVAR, SO FAR. CLICK BELOW. open.substack.com/pub/nascar/p...

open.substack.com

Hocevar, So Far, In 2026

A quick rundown of every Carson Hocevar moment this season, and we'll let you decide if they were uncalled for or totally rad

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NASCARCASM @nascarcasm.bsky.social · 15/07/2026

Bullying works, all-Blaney edition #NASCAR

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NASCARCASM @nascarcasm.bsky.social · 13/07/2026

A little something about myself, I get weapons-grade pissed off in July when my neighbors shoot off fireworks any later than 8:30 p.m. but have no problem turning 38 130-decibel race cars loose for two more hours at midnight. Watch me dance this merry jig of double standards.

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NASCARCASM @nascarcasm.bsky.social · 13/07/2026

So Ryan Blaney won at @EchoParkSpdwy in the wee hours of the morning and received several (very fake) texts afterwards. Read them all below👇🏻 open.substack.com/pub/nascar/p...

open.substack.com

Fake Texts to EchoPark Speedway winner Ryan Blaney

These texts are not real in any way whatsoever

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