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Matt Olson

@metalson.bsky.social
698 followers 347 following 5.4K posts

Freelance marine biologist, stoner doom metal zealot. Parody account, not the real @metalson

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Matt Olson @metalson.bsky.social · 2h
If this guy was willing to spend any political capital to reign in the fascist ICE-aligned NYPD you would have seen some indication of it by now, surely.
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Matt Olson @metalson.bsky.social · 3h
Everybody was way more mad on twitter today, this place was too normal. Do better everyone.
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Reposted by Matt Olson
Curb Your Malthusiasm @manucleardevice.bsky.social · 07/10/2026
Zohran Mamdani ran on anti-genocide and said he would arrest Netanyahu on the campaign trail then provided him a police escort to the UN while arresting protesters. He’s maintained a Zionist police head and given millions to Zionist institutions. He’s condemned protestors of illegal land sales.
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Matt Olson @metalson.bsky.social · 07/10/2026
Five and a half minute pizza or it’s free!
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Matt Olson @metalson.bsky.social · 07/10/2026
well how am I supposed to find her now?
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Matt Olson @metalson.bsky.social · 06/10/2026
We hebben een serieus probleem met de smookeen
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Matt Olson @metalson.bsky.social · 06/10/2026
First day would probably like, a bi-partisan resolution to condemn “violent anti-ICE protestors”
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Matt Olson @metalson.bsky.social · 06/10/2026
The most beautiful sentence in the english language is “Using a field of half-C sprats, and brass-fitted nickel slits, our bracketed caps, and splay-flexed brace columns vent dampers to dampening hatch depths of one half meter from the damper crown to the spurve plinths.” youtu.be/Ue1hkQots1w?...
youtu.be
Leslie Claret (Kurtwood Smith) in Patriot S01Ep02
YouTube video by Joshua Hughes
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Matt Olson @metalson.bsky.social · 06/10/2026
cool
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Matt Olson @metalson.bsky.social · 06/10/2026
oh shit whats that guy up to
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Matt Olson @metalson.bsky.social · 06/10/2026
They really tried to make that be the movie that everyone associated with that song
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Matt Olson @metalson.bsky.social · 05/10/2026
What do you mean you can’t tell me dressed like this?
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Matt Olson @metalson.bsky.social · 05/10/2026
Hey thanks for having me over, nice place uh… 👂* 🛎️… 🛎️… 🛎️… Where’s that- 🛎️… 🛎️… 🛎️… where’s that sound coming from?
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Matt Olson @metalson.bsky.social · 05/10/2026
Most of them voted for the message of “cheaper groceries”, if the opposition party wasn’t controlled they would have been able to counter that message easily.
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Matt Olson @metalson.bsky.social · 05/10/2026
Getting up every morning and climbing the tower stairs up to my rookery hoping to find a white raven from the citadel signaling that this great summer has finally come to an end.
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Matt Olson @metalson.bsky.social · 05/10/2026
you wish
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Matt Olson @metalson.bsky.social · 05/10/2026
Those NPCs didn’t believe they were simulated, I was doing Roko’s work.
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Matt Olson @metalson.bsky.social · 05/10/2026
The problem is HERE👇
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Matt Olson @metalson.bsky.social · 05/10/2026
What Mars would look like if a giant pufferfish swallowed it.
The planet Mars but it’s been swallowed by a giant puffer-fish
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Matt Olson @metalson.bsky.social · 05/10/2026
tortured to death by the cops even!
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Matt Olson @metalson.bsky.social · 04/10/2026
I understand being pissed and saying fuck you or whatever, but it’s just not very rock and roll to get THAT mad over it. Like, chill.
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Matt Olson @metalson.bsky.social · 04/10/2026
I saw the singer of the band Uncle Acid get way too pissed about someone tossing their drink at him during their show the other week. Like, he wouldn’t let it go. He tried to kick the guy out but failed, and then he was just grumpy the whole rest of the show. Maybe even ended the set early over it.
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Matt Olson @metalson.bsky.social · 04/10/2026
Is this something I have to be worried about? Kind of seems like a lot to deal with.
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Matt Olson @metalson.bsky.social · 03/10/2026
Even the ones with a D next to thier name
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Matt Olson @metalson.bsky.social · 03/10/2026
(Reading someone’s address) So who the hell is this “Doctor Apartment 301?”
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Matt Olson @metalson.bsky.social · 03/10/2026
Every fried chicken place wants to sell you 4 wings. What the fuck is 4 wings?
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Matt Olson @metalson.bsky.social · 03/10/2026
Marxism already is dumbed down! Not to say it’s dumb I just mean it’s stupidly simple! A worker is entitled to the wealth their labor produces, period! Say “work” instead of “labor” sure but it’s not some esoteric philosophy.
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Matt Olson @metalson.bsky.social · 03/10/2026
from my cold dead hips
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Matt Olson @metalson.bsky.social · 02/10/2026
SMH, some people just wanna watch the world not burn.
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Matt Olson @metalson.bsky.social · 02/10/2026
Rob Zombie spending the last few years touring with Manson and acting like nothing was wrong went a long way towards rehabilitating Manson’s public image, and he’s not catching enough flak for it.
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Matt Olson @metalson.bsky.social · 02/10/2026
i also felt this way about Ma
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Matt Olson @metalson.bsky.social · 29/09/2026
Do prisoners with bad behavior only get rated R movies?
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Matt Olson @metalson.bsky.social · 29/09/2026
You’re never gonna stop getting FBI recruitment ads now.
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Matt Olson @metalson.bsky.social · 29/09/2026
Complaining about El Niño in english makes you sound like Homer Simpson.
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Matt Olson @metalson.bsky.social · 27/09/2026
Why would you want a democrat to win an election? Don’t you know that’s something Trump does?
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Matt Olson @metalson.bsky.social · 27/09/2026
Do you think achieving tangible policy goals is inherently a bad thing just because fascists do it?
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Matt Olson @metalson.bsky.social · 27/09/2026
If i had the same policy agenda as trump I would like that he implemented his policy agenda.
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Matt Olson @metalson.bsky.social · 26/09/2026
I just think the law doesn’t really matter.
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Matt Olson @metalson.bsky.social · 26/09/2026
Is he not an example of how you can just do things you’re not allowed to do?
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Matt Olson @metalson.bsky.social · 26/09/2026
I’m not saying there wouldn’t be political or legal repercussions but it’s worth pointing out that we have generations of political and legal infrastructure specifically built around not holding executive power accountable for overstepping it’s authority.
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Matt Olson @metalson.bsky.social · 26/09/2026
I’m not a liberal I’m a communist I’m allowed to not like him some of the time, but I mean I like him sometimes too.
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Matt Olson @metalson.bsky.social · 26/09/2026
That doesn’t really matter
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Matt Olson @metalson.bsky.social · 26/09/2026
A dracula is a vampire with it’s collar flipped up, and a frankenstein is a zombie with little neck bolts.
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Matt Olson @metalson.bsky.social · 25/09/2026
Cavemen sitcom erasure
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Matt Olson @metalson.bsky.social · 25/09/2026
I agree but only because it took a while for them to figure out what breaking bad was supposed to be and they figured it out on the fly. Seasons 3-5 of breaking bad are better than saul.
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Matt Olson @metalson.bsky.social · 25/09/2026
If you’re just going about your day and you see footage of Gary Oldman saying that somebody’s been killing his slow horses it means you’re in a coma.
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Matt Olson @metalson.bsky.social · 24/09/2026
I binged Slow Horses and the Steven Conrad tv show Patriot back to back, and I can’t stress enough what a terrible, uninspired and boring tv show Slow Horses is.
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Matt Olson @metalson.bsky.social · 24/09/2026
No dude, that’s a cool look. It’s got a grungy jean jacket kinda vibe.
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Matt Olson @metalson.bsky.social · 24/09/2026
A nuclear apocalypse wouldn’t kill off the cockroaches, unless that nuclear apocalypse also somehow triggered a flood of slightly soapy water.
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Matt Olson @metalson.bsky.social · 24/09/2026
No the furbys were believed to be evil, the tamagotchis were a force for good.
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