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Mathonwy

@mathonwy.bsky.social
1.5K followers 481 following 19K posts

Goddess of Spring and Apple Blossom Maid | pomologist, poetess, princess, Otherworldly cider hall waitress, and your friendly apple maiden 🍎 [she/her/hers] | warded by my beloved Dana 💍💖

PostsRepliesMedia
Mathonwy @mathonwy.bsky.social · 15h
When I'm queen, all pornography will have to be breathtakingly romantic. I mean, I guess all of you allosexual folks can have your five minute sex scene, if you insist, but not until you are forced to watch a 2 hour epic adventure about the daring, affectionate love between two (or more) people.
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Mathonwy @mathonwy.bsky.social · 15h
When I'm queen, you'll have to read all of my posts. There will be a quiz. Those who fail the daily Mathonwy Post Quiz will be given amnesty, but I'll give them a stern lecture about how I am very disappointed in them, hands on my hips and frown and all. I might even call them by their full names.
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Mathonwy @mathonwy.bsky.social · 15h
I always talk about serious policy issues when I say, "When I'm queen..." Let's talk about something unserious. When I'm queen, I'm abolishing surnames. You're all going to have matronymics, but I'll be the All-Mother, so everyone's will be Mathonwysdaughter or Mathonwysson or Mathonwyschild.
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Mathonwy @mathonwy.bsky.social · 15h
What on earth are you talking about? Working class people are probably MORE likely not to have a stay-at-home parent in the household compared more affluent professional couples, where one might be able to afford to stay home (or work from home, or work part-time, or take sabbaticals, etc.).
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Mathonwy @mathonwy.bsky.social · 16h
AI music is in fact not good. Those who say "AI music is now good" lack the tools to appreciate music. That tracks, since those who say "AI art is now good" clearly lack art appreciation skills. When I'm queen, you won't be allowed to work with computers until you work 20 years as an actual artist.
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Mathonwy @mathonwy.bsky.social · 17h
I started off my morning knocking over a full, unopened bottle of red wine that exploded next to the refrigerator, so I just had to mop the kitchen floor—including having to move the fridge to clean under it.
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Mathonwy @mathonwy.bsky.social · 29/09/2026
Today's apple harvest! Cox's Orange Pippin, Wolf River, Reine de Reinettes, Twenty Ounce, Pitmaston Pineapple, Westfield Seek-no-further, Knobby Russett, Belle de Boskoop, and Hudson's Golden Gem!
Some assorted apples on my stovetop, following the list in my post from the top down.
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Mathonwy @mathonwy.bsky.social · 29/09/2026
They hold their court at the Poundland near the Camelot Shopping Centre.
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Mathonwy @mathonwy.bsky.social · 28/09/2026
British people need to come up with a better response to Americans not pronouncing the H in 'herb' than just "oi mate there's a HAYTCH in there!" Pronounce hour and honour for me. Go ahead, do it, I dare you. I DARE YOU. OPEN THE DOOR AND PRONOUNCE HOUR AND HONOUR FOR ME!
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Mathonwy @mathonwy.bsky.social · 28/09/2026
I mean, fair enough, but this is kind of a trite observation. How many people are in such a bubble that excludes knowledge of Mozart's operas or the goth stylings of The Sisters of Mercy? We all live in such kinds of bubbles of pop culture knowledge, what exactly is the utility of such observations?
Someone posting:

"well I don't have a TV or a radio so it's not surprising I haven't heard the song"
You live in a bubble. What you're describing is a self-curated bubble. If you haven't heard the song that's been no. 1 on the charts for 23 weeks, you live in a bubble and you should probably be aware of that.
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Mathonwy @mathonwy.bsky.social · 28/09/2026
Maybe I'm just not old enough to remember how wishy-washy meteorological science was in the middle of the 20th century and earlier, but I don't understand the enduring trope that "weathermen can't ever get anything right". I can't remember the last time I saw a weather forecast be off by much.
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Mathonwy @mathonwy.bsky.social · 28/09/2026
I'm not as Extremely Online as I used to be when I had more free time on my hands in the 2010s and early 2020s, so sometimes I log in here and see that there's some kind of discourse and I'm torn between rabid curiosity and the Homer-Simpson-Slinks-Back-Through-The-Hedges thing.
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Mathonwy @mathonwy.bsky.social · 28/09/2026
People want capitalism, but they also want to frequent businesses that The Market has decided aren't that profitable anymore. I mean, I wish there was a Casio store where I could browse hundreds of neat digital watches and buy in-person, so maybe we could throw that in there, too!
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Mathonwy @mathonwy.bsky.social · 28/09/2026
Not to sound old, but my students don't know anything that I was forced to read in school. I'm not one of those "stop taking the classics out of the curriculum!" folks. Update it all you want! I think I'd just like a memo so I can stop assuming that my students read Shakespeare and Chaucer.
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Mathonwy @mathonwy.bsky.social · 28/09/2026
LOVED this film!
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Mathonwy @mathonwy.bsky.social · 28/09/2026
This is just the everyday experience of visiting your average coffee shop in Western Massachusetts. Although personally it's "crunchy hippy-ish male barista" who is the ruder variety. I'll take the pixie cut barista anyday over him. I've been told off for ordering wrong by the former too often.
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Mathonwy @mathonwy.bsky.social · 26/09/2026
Bramble would complain that Dana lets me have more room on the bed than him, that Dana feeds me more than him, that Dana pays too much attention to me than to him. He'd basically be like, "Why hasn't Dana had enough of that wench yet? When is it Bramble's time? Put her back on the shelf."
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Mathonwy @mathonwy.bsky.social · 25/09/2026
I just cleaned for two hours, so why do I still have to go to work today? Haven't I done ENOUGH?! WHAT DO YOU WANT FROM ME?!
Rapunzel doesn't want to do labour today.
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Mathonwy @mathonwy.bsky.social · 25/09/2026
This one still irritates me to this day. If you're judging my abilities to do a job or my personal character because I like cheeseburgers, I think it's *you* that has the problem, not me, and maybe *you're* the one not qualified for any job that involves other people. Grow up, dēgōmes.
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Mathonwy @mathonwy.bsky.social · 25/09/2026
The whole "bringing iced coffee to a job interview thing" has me thinking about how ridiculous interviews really are. I once overheard a hiring manager at an old job calling a candidate "sloppy" because it was a Zoom interview and there was a shopping bag somewhere in the background.
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Mathonwy @mathonwy.bsky.social · 25/09/2026
A quarter of my classes has been out sick and I was missing half of a performing ensemble for rehearsal today. I'm surprised I'm not sick already.
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Mathonwy @mathonwy.bsky.social · 24/09/2026
Dana and I are going to go to the Greenfield lesbian bar. xD
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Mathonwy @mathonwy.bsky.social · 23/09/2026
I have a pagan student who keeps inviting me to pagan events. I never told them that I was a goddess. They must be onto me!
Princess Aurora looking pensive.
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Mathonwy @mathonwy.bsky.social · 21/09/2026
Easily the best logo for anything I've ever seen.
A logo of a YouTuber/car restorer called "Scottish Car Clan" featuring a unicorn rampant with a traffic cone on its head.
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Mathonwy @mathonwy.bsky.social · 21/09/2026
Everyone who takes my courses should have to fill out a character sheet like we're playing D&D to make my classes feel more like adventures than lectures. This is a terrible idea, of course, but it's still morning and I'm drinking tea and daydreaming of whimsies.
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Mathonwy @mathonwy.bsky.social · 21/09/2026
One of my pet peeves is that people use "dawn" to be synonymous with "sunrise" rather than the period of growing light BEFORE sunrise. I'm not a linguistic prescriptivist by any means, but you can't change the usage of the word "dawn". What will we replace it with to describe pre-sunrise twilight?
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Mathonwy @mathonwy.bsky.social · 21/09/2026
Normalise letting femme women wear huge Casio G-Shock watches because I really like mine and don't always want dainty things on my wrist.
A Casio G-Shock DW-9052 on my wrist.
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Mathonwy @mathonwy.bsky.social · 21/09/2026
It's going to be a wood stove kind of winter. Might even fire up the coal stove in my cellar. The natural gas is going to be costly.
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Mathonwy @mathonwy.bsky.social · 21/09/2026
Name: Mathonwy Height: 6 feet / 183 cm Nicknames: The Apple Blossom Maiden, The Lady of Life Siblings: Two Sisters Relationship: Dana's wife Crushing on: Dana, obviously! Fave Season: My own, obviously! (Springtide) Fave Colour: Apple blossom pink Live: The Otherworld (3 seasons a year)
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Mathonwy @mathonwy.bsky.social · 21/09/2026
It had my kindness below 60% and my toxicity was in the 40s, so I reckon this is not a particularly good tool. I mean, one thing that seemingly every human says about me is that I am very kind and not toxic, so I can't imagine this analyser knowing me any better! So cheer up, Dave!
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Mathonwy @mathonwy.bsky.social · 21/09/2026
One thing I've noticed is that I've only been misgendered a lot since 2015. The anti-trans moral panic has definitely rotted people's brains horribly. Now, suddenly, I can dress more femme than I ever have and people just, what, have trouble accepting that it's a woman in front of them? *shrug*
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Mathonwy @mathonwy.bsky.social · 20/09/2026
Mine was Super Mario Bros. 2. It was the first game I could play as a girl character and it made me feel like games were for me.
static.klipy.com
Mario Princess
Alt: Princess Toadstool (Peach) fighting Birdo in Super Mario Bros. 2 for the NES.
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Mathonwy @mathonwy.bsky.social · 19/09/2026
Gae aff, quene.
Rapunzel with a Scottish flag superimposed upon her.
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Mathonwy @mathonwy.bsky.social · 19/09/2026
"Cold at the Top" by Kneecap. www.youtube.com/watch?v=ji-x...
youtube.com
Cold at the Top
YouTube video by KNEECAP - Topic
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Mathonwy @mathonwy.bsky.social · 19/09/2026
Watership Down
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Reposted by Mathonwy
Dana @danatyphon.bsky.social · 17/09/2026
Harry Potter at least had two important derivative works: The Methods of Rationality and My Immortal. One is a puerile power fantasy, laughably badly written, with a less than adolescent insight into the world, and a tragically transparent author insert main character. The other is My Immortal.
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Mathonwy @mathonwy.bsky.social · 18/09/2026
I like my landlady, but she has this annoying habit of coming to fix something and then deciding that 10 other things need to be fixed, and then she just shows up 10 days in a row to fix the 10 problems she made up. And like, lady, I like you, but please get out of my house for at least a month.
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Reposted by Mathonwy
Devyn Gwynne @devyngwynne.bsky.social · 18/09/2026
How I feel strolling up to lecture/ How my students see me lecturing
Hudson williams 2026 outdoors smoking looking maybe the coolest anyone has looked. Charlie day mind map scene from it’s always sunny.
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Mathonwy @mathonwy.bsky.social · 18/09/2026
Completely unrelated to my last post, an American student just signed off an email to me with "cofion gorau". I didn't even tell that class that I'm Welsh. I mean, my name pretty obviously gives it away and I still have the tiniest shred of an accent, but wow, random synchronicity!
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Mathonwy @mathonwy.bsky.social · 18/09/2026
I just bought some books in Welsh because I'm bored. I even donated to the publishing house.
A receipt for the purchase of Yr Hobyd by JRR Tolkien and Bronwen by Beriah Gwynfe Evans.
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Mathonwy @mathonwy.bsky.social · 18/09/2026
The toll payment notices from the Massachusetts Turnpike are the most threatening bills I've ever received. "Pay this toll or we'll send you to collections, revoke your driving licence, subject you to fees, raid your fridge, eat all of your crisps, scuff your shoes, and put your spouse in a tower."
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Mathonwy @mathonwy.bsky.social · 17/09/2026
So @pizzafacts.bsky.social has taught me today that: 1. I am capable of some level of seduction with the right audience, and, 2. Trans women make better apple maidens, so be prepared to be recruited in the Otherworld.
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Mathonwy @mathonwy.bsky.social · 17/09/2026
Post of photo of yourself all dressed up.
Me sitting on a couch in a black and white floral dress and rarely seen heels (because I'm 6 feet tall and I don't like being any taller). I have my cello in my lap.
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Mathonwy @mathonwy.bsky.social · 17/09/2026
This kind of system was why I gave up on that Spoutible site before it even got off the ground. Woke up one day to see a percentage next to my handle and nope'd out of there.
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Mathonwy @mathonwy.bsky.social · 17/09/2026
YouTube occasionally thinks I'm a man due to my watch collection. Because of this, I have been introduced to the "everyday carry" community. They carry more than I do in my handbag, so maybe I *am* more traditionally masculine than this community and deserve to see male-oriented videos.
Rapunzel everyday carries things in her handbag, just as I do.
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Mathonwy @mathonwy.bsky.social · 16/09/2026
Dana likes to joke that my "girl dinners" are actually "dad dinners" because I'll eat blue cheese and water biscuits or peanut butter or jam and saltines. This is what Dana's dad likes to eat for lunch, so I guess it tracks.
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Mathonwy @mathonwy.bsky.social · 16/09/2026
Blossomtology sounds like my job.
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Mathonwy @mathonwy.bsky.social · 16/09/2026
When I'm queen, I'm building 800 million studio apartments that sell for $1 each until I absolutely crash the housing market entirely. Your $600,000 house is going to be worth 10 cents when I'm through, and I will laugh maniacally on my throne inside my efficiency studio palace.
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Mathonwy @mathonwy.bsky.social · 16/09/2026
Introduced my class to Wil Cwac Cwac and now they can't get enough of it.
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Mathonwy @mathonwy.bsky.social · 16/09/2026
Me: *sitting alone in the band room eating Tayto and drinking IRN BRU* Student: *walks in and stares at me* Me: *stares back, placing crisp slowly in my mouth* Student: You're giving off a "sinister fairy woman" energy, Professor. Me: Crisp? *grins* Student: Do I have to give you my soul first?
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