Marshall Scott @marshallscott.bsky.social · 19/11/2025Thank you for bringing this to my attention 120
Marshall Scott @marshallscott.bsky.social · 15/11/2025Apologizing to my boss that I haven’t tweeted about him in awhile 5406
Marshall Scott @marshallscott.bsky.social · 05/11/2025Your honor, the prosecution has spent all their time taking about me, but more importantly, how are *you* 07215
Marshall Scott @marshallscott.bsky.social · 05/11/2025*holding up a 1,042 page document* Marshall Scott: your honor, I would like to submit this into evidence The Judge: this is just pictures of your lawyer’s dogs?? 0274
Marshall Scott @marshallscott.bsky.social · 05/11/2025media.tenor.coma man is holding a microphone and making a funny face .ALT: a man is holding a microphone and making a funny face . 020
Marshall Scott @marshallscott.bsky.social · 05/11/2025media.tenor.coma man is holding a microphone in front of a blue curtain and talking into it .ALT: a man is holding a microphone in front of a blue curtain and talking into it . 020
Marshall Scott @marshallscott.bsky.social · 05/11/2025Do you ever think about how there’s infinite different versions of you that exist in people’s minds cuz everyone perceives you differently and in some people’s minds you don’t exist at all 65411
Marshall Scott @marshallscott.bsky.social · 03/11/2025Bro I don’t think we saved the daylight bro 2525
Marshall Scott @marshallscott.bsky.social · 28/09/2025media.tenor.coma young boy in a green and black striped shirt is smiling and says jesus christ .ALT: a young boy in a green and black striped shirt is smiling and says jesus christ . 040
Marshall Scott @marshallscott.bsky.social · 26/09/2025Calling the police cuz someone turned the escalator into stairs 28511
Marshall Scott @marshallscott.bsky.social · 24/09/2025Rubbing crushed Tylenol on my gums while easily walking up a broken escalator 1748
Marshall Scott @marshallscott.bsky.social · 24/09/2025Freebasing Tylenol in the office parking lot 1266
Marshall Scott @marshallscott.bsky.social · 24/09/2025I thought he got trapped in an elevator, are you telling me the escalator turned into stairs and he didn’t know what to do 😭 0224
Marshall Scott @marshallscott.bsky.social · 03/09/2025Getting escorted outta the bar cuz I won’t stop showing the bartender my old tweets 38713
Marshall Scott @marshallscott.bsky.social · 02/09/2025If I skeet here If I just skeet here Would you skeet with me And just skeet at the world 45310
Marshall Scott @marshallscott.bsky.social · 18/07/2025No I didn't see the Coldplay jumbotron thing I was busy looking at my wife 614715
Marshall Scott @marshallscott.bsky.social · 09/07/2025How many Jonks would Jonk bonk if Jonk could bonk Jonks 291
Marshall Scott @marshallscott.bsky.social · 09/07/2025You made the hole whole bro wanna play whack a mole 170
Marshall Scott @marshallscott.bsky.social · 04/07/2025Still can’t believe we have a federal holiday to celebrate the 1996 hit movie Independence Day 512824
Marshall Scott @marshallscott.bsky.social · 28/06/2025Can’t believe Elon would do that to a Republican who went to Cornell 000
Marshall Scott @marshallscott.bsky.social · 22/06/2025No I didn't see Donald start WWIII I was busy looking at my wife 0292
Marshall Scott @marshallscott.bsky.social · 19/06/2025Racist coworkers be like “I’m going to work tomorrow” 3272
Marshall Scott @marshallscott.bsky.social · 18/06/2025And if I only could I'd make a deal with Grok And get him to be more racist -Elon Musk, alone in twitters headquarters shooting up ketamine 1324
Marshall Scott @marshallscott.bsky.social · 10/06/2025Asking my dentist a question then sticking my fingers in his mouth before he replies 27514
