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Hostile takeover

@lilylute.bsky.social
397 followers 258 following 1.4K posts

Bpd ranting account

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Hostile takeover @lilylute.bsky.social · 16/10/2025
eh i'm back for now
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Hostile takeover @lilylute.bsky.social · 10/07/2025
Being the bad guy in couple's therapy sucks. If I wanted to tell myself on repeat for an hour and a half that I'm a giant piece of shit I could have done that at home.
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Hostile takeover @lilylute.bsky.social · 24/06/2025
Boutta step on a flight over a girl. I'm so cooked.
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Reposted by Hostile takeover
leon @leyawn.bsky.social · 23/06/2025
Lavos, the alien monster intent on destroying all life, has emerged from beneath the planet's surface to endorse Andrew Cuomo in the New York City mayoral race. "Cuomo has the experience and character necessary to lead," said Lavos, while fire rained from the sky
lavos, the main antagonist from the 1995 rpg chrono trigger
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Hostile takeover @lilylute.bsky.social · 22/06/2025
I feel like I'm just a top now.
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Hostile takeover @lilylute.bsky.social · 22/06/2025
I've never had a piece of information make me both feel worse AND way better at the same time. I guess knowing is half the battle
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Hostile takeover @lilylute.bsky.social · 22/06/2025
My imagination was worse but still gonna take some pretty bad psychic damage from this one. Oof.
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Hostile takeover @lilylute.bsky.social · 21/06/2025
At my ex's parents place helping them cook dinner for midsommarafton. Kinda weird but they nice.
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Hostile takeover @lilylute.bsky.social · 21/06/2025
Them sending a heart had way to powerful of a physical effect on me. I just almost cried when she messaged me she misses me. I'm cooked.
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Hostile takeover @lilylute.bsky.social · 20/06/2025
Fucking ow why does it always have to hurt
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Hostile takeover @lilylute.bsky.social · 20/06/2025
Some morning crying and self hatred, as a treat.
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Hostile takeover @lilylute.bsky.social · 19/06/2025
Yooo too exhausted to feel the suffering.
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Hostile takeover @lilylute.bsky.social · 18/06/2025
I'm gonna die she's so fucking beautiful i wanna die
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Hostile takeover @lilylute.bsky.social · 18/06/2025
How did I not remember my favorite FP breakup song, first love/ late spring by mitski.
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Hostile takeover @lilylute.bsky.social · 18/06/2025
I know it's cope but it's making me feel better enough to not making my soul scream in pain 24/7 until my flight. After the flight I can deal with the reality that I'll probably end up in pain again but at least I'll be able to work through my pain instead of rotting in it.
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Hostile takeover @lilylute.bsky.social · 17/06/2025
Finally made a decent lunch again
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Hostile takeover @lilylute.bsky.social · 17/06/2025
That's it. I'm picking up smoking as a coping mechanism. I'm tired of weed and alcohol.
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Hostile takeover @lilylute.bsky.social · 17/06/2025
It's so much hurt and it's ALL the time =/ searing pain in my heart.
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Hostile takeover @lilylute.bsky.social · 17/06/2025
"idk I thought Cleveland was in Maine or something" my former paramour who has lived in the US their entire lives
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Hostile takeover @lilylute.bsky.social · 16/06/2025
I'm going next week. I don't care if I have to busk to make ends meet, go to food banks, and fuck strangers under the guise of cooking them food so i can eat. I can't live with this searing pain in my chest anymore.
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Hostile takeover @lilylute.bsky.social · 16/06/2025
Every time I wake up at all I feel a shot of adrenaline from thr pain in my heart and it prevents me from falling asleep =/
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Hostile takeover @lilylute.bsky.social · 15/06/2025
My heart is on fire.
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Hostile takeover @lilylute.bsky.social · 15/06/2025
Terrifying realization that your fp neither wants or needs you anymore. Happened awhile ago but still fuckin hurting. I feel pathetic.
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Hostile takeover @lilylute.bsky.social · 15/06/2025
Welp ended things w partner. Time to enter my hoe arc to somehow extricate my sexuality away from my fp.
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Hostile takeover @lilylute.bsky.social · 15/06/2025
Therepeutic crying instead of just pure sorrow is good
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Hostile takeover @lilylute.bsky.social · 14/06/2025
Make this person lead UN negotiator stat!
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Hostile takeover @lilylute.bsky.social · 13/06/2025
I have discussed potential breakup with partner, they are supportive and I think it will be the right choice.
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Hostile takeover @lilylute.bsky.social · 13/06/2025
I feel a lot lot better after the convo. I am satisfied, I just hope they don't double back and say some stuff that will hurt. I am happy for things to rest where they're at. I actually feel pretty okaym
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Hostile takeover @lilylute.bsky.social · 13/06/2025
I very transparently care so much all the time.
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Hostile takeover @lilylute.bsky.social · 13/06/2025
It baffles me that my dr thinks I'm cis but alright. Sweet Romanian woman.
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Hostile takeover @lilylute.bsky.social · 12/06/2025
Inspired by standup, I WILL be proposing via glory hole.
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Hostile takeover @lilylute.bsky.social · 12/06/2025
Now we'll see how the heterosexuell Danish standup compares to the homosexual Swedish standup.
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Hostile takeover @lilylute.bsky.social · 12/06/2025
Realizing that I don't even want to be in Sweden really changed the calculus for me. I don't want to live here. I don't like the culture. I hate the job market. The queer community doesn't feel like home.
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Hostile takeover @lilylute.bsky.social · 12/06/2025
I think I found a career job in Cleveland. I guess I'll plan on that move soon =/
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Hostile takeover @lilylute.bsky.social · 12/06/2025
Lib bullshit. The economy being large is literally meaningless if people are struggling and suffering. Germany is objectively a better place for the AVERAGE person to live. If anything, this is an indictment of failed economic policies that benefit the wealthy.
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Hostile takeover @lilylute.bsky.social · 11/06/2025
You can't trick me, mental illness, into escalating my own downfall.
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Hostile takeover @lilylute.bsky.social · 11/06/2025
Having kind of figured out what my next steps are, I'm a relieved. I'm looking forward to re-becoming the person I liked, the person that had a lot to offer. I'll learn from my fuck ups, then move on.
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Hostile takeover @lilylute.bsky.social · 11/06/2025
I'm also glad I'm not the brand of bpd that puts their fps on pedestals. I'm glad I'm able to acknowledge my feelings without deifying someone.
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Hostile takeover @lilylute.bsky.social · 11/06/2025
I'm so fucking glad I'm not a cyberstalking person that sht would destroy me lmao
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Hostile takeover @lilylute.bsky.social · 11/06/2025
Having talked to partner, I've come to a conclusion. I can handle losing an fp, I can heal and grow from it. And I can handle being unemployed, I can use that time to grow and develop myself. But I can't handle both. I think moving back to the US is inevitable.
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Hostile takeover @lilylute.bsky.social · 11/06/2025
Holy fuck I'm doing poorly. Something has to change.
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Hostile takeover @lilylute.bsky.social · 11/06/2025
Ye. I'm definitely going to apply to work in Sweden, Denmark, Cleveland, and DC. Where I find work is where I'll live. And it will probably be Cleveland because that's where I have most connections
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Hostile takeover @lilylute.bsky.social · 11/06/2025
I genuinely think if I find work I'll stabilize enough to grow. I just need to get something. It's helped in the past. I think i can work on myself then, get back on track with my goals for myself. It's worth going back to the US if it means working. I needed time to truly figure out what I needed.
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Hostile takeover @lilylute.bsky.social · 11/06/2025
Maybe I'll pick up a new vice. Like smoking. I'll still only do edibles when I can. But crack I can smoke.
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Hostile takeover @lilylute.bsky.social · 11/06/2025
Maybe I'll photocopy all ghe pages of my journals over the years and post them on social media so I can be up front about how crazy and shitty I am
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Hostile takeover @lilylute.bsky.social · 11/06/2025
Might as well share good shit. Here's a cute fucking duck, and me being cute with it.
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Hostile takeover @lilylute.bsky.social · 11/06/2025
Sorry to the people reading this pathetic shit. But last time I lost an fp I didn't pathetic post enough. I'm gonna be loud about it. This person was important to me. Losing them has destroyed m. And that's okay. I'll survive even if I'll never get over them. I'm allowed to be destroyed and cry.
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Hostile takeover @lilylute.bsky.social · 11/06/2025
Destroyed*
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Hostile takeover @lilylute.bsky.social · 11/06/2025
I never should have gotten on that plane. Second biggest mistake of my life, with the worst happening after I got on it.
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Hostile takeover @lilylute.bsky.social · 11/06/2025
Gonna apply to career jobs in the places I have somewhere to stay. May thr best city/continent win.
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