Kirk Howle @kirkhowle.bsky.social · 07/10/2026If I hyperventilate I'm gonna pass out, and then you'll think I'm dead. But I'll wait until you walk away and then I'll wake up and THEN I'll breathe my last breath! 110
Kirk Howle @kirkhowle.bsky.social · 07/10/2026Nuh-uh! I'm gonna breathe in and out real fast when you blink. You won't see it. 130
Kirk Howle @kirkhowle.bsky.social · 07/10/2026Drop some PRODUCEstatic.klipy.comOh My God!!!Alt: Guy who realizes they are eating her and then they are going to eat him. 010
Kirk Howle @kirkhowle.bsky.social · 07/10/2026They could have caught that typo and corrected it to "fist anal." 100
Kirk Howle @kirkhowle.bsky.social · 07/10/2026How I arrived on Bluesky...static.klipy.comGhoulieAlt: Ghoulie popping up out of the toilet. 150
Kirk Howle @kirkhowle.bsky.social · 07/10/2026Godzilla Minus Zero equals Godzilla. They could have saved us all the math and just called the movie Godzilla. 120
Kirk Howle @kirkhowle.bsky.social · 06/10/2026youtu.be/2fBQiOQXWyM?...youtu.beBoilermakerYouTube video by The Jesus Lizard - Topic 010
Kirk Howle @kirkhowle.bsky.social · 05/10/2026Right? It's like, sometimes I'm just bein' a hu-man, and sometimes I'm just peein' on a shoe, man. 110
Kirk Howle @kirkhowle.bsky.social · 05/10/2026Today, instead of putting your nose to the grindstone, try putting your KNOWS to the MIND-ZONE. 150
Kirk Howle @kirkhowle.bsky.social · 02/10/2026"I used to bullseye womp rats in my T16 --" "Whoa whoa whoa, son, that's animal cruelty! What, did you used to run a dog-fighting ring too, you sicko???" 010
Kirk Howle @kirkhowle.bsky.social · 02/10/2026"A watch? No. I call it a time band, it's... what I use to tell time." 020
Kirk Howle @kirkhowle.bsky.social · 02/10/2026How many midichlorians do I need to be able to play this game? Last I checked, my levels were low. Doctor says I got low M. 100
Kirk Howle @kirkhowle.bsky.social · 29/09/2026That's why we need him! An improvement on the old wooden model. 111
Kirk Howle @kirkhowle.bsky.social · 28/09/2026Where are the veins? Where are the ball hairs? Is this minimalism? 010
Kirk Howle @kirkhowle.bsky.social · 25/09/2026A Ferrari that crashes several times while you drive it, so the driver has to keep getting out to repair the damage to the car and also repair the damage the car caused. Yeah, sounds way faster than driving a normal car the normal way! I'm sure all the repairs look very soulful. 030
Kirk Howle @kirkhowle.bsky.social · 23/09/2026On the road again, With my foot up on the 'board again, Hope Marc don't share this with his Bluesky friends, But I can't wait to keep bein' a pig person! 240
Kirk Howle @kirkhowle.bsky.social · 21/09/2026Saaay, you might be onto something here. I'd love to watch a guy in a forklift fight a guy in a backhoe! 110
Kirk Howle @kirkhowle.bsky.social · 21/09/2026Permission to change the phrase "gooky cookie" to "crumby cummies," SIR! 110
Kirk Howle @kirkhowle.bsky.social · 21/09/2026Cool how the guy hits the robot once, waits while it stumbles backwards and recalibrates itself, and then lets it kick him a bunch of times. These robots are so good at beating people who let them win. Kinda feels like a metaphor for the whole A.I. thing in general. 120
Kirk Howle @kirkhowle.bsky.social · 21/09/2026You just have to imagine it being said in Frankenstein's voice, that's all. 120
Kirk Howle @kirkhowle.bsky.social · 21/09/2026I always fly into a rage at that part in the song, The Magic Store, where the lyrics go, "You're a clown and a fool!" How dare they sing such things at me. I will not stand for it. You hear me, Muppet Movie??? 010
Kirk Howle @kirkhowle.bsky.social · 21/09/2026Self-made man? No no no, you misheard me. I said I am a selfish madman! 120
Kirk Howle @kirkhowle.bsky.social · 20/09/2026The Crypt Keeper is gonna need a Crypt TRAPPER Keeper to keep track of all these twists and turns and traps and TRIPS! Also, this episode will feature a special guest appearance by SPECTRAL GHOST John Ritter, a.k.a. Jack TRIPPER! Keep her? I hardly know her! 120
Kirk Howle @kirkhowle.bsky.social · 20/09/2026But just when the circus freak thinks he's off the hook, his twin's ventriloquist dummy starts talking on its own, and it starts blabbing to everyone about the murder.The freak tries to poison the dummy but mixes in a love potion by accident. Now the dummy's reanimated corpse is in love with him! 120
Kirk Howle @kirkhowle.bsky.social · 12/09/2026This is how I feel about every riddle I've ever heard. The clue will be like, "What has bitterness in its heart, and grows more wrinkly with age?" And I'll be like, "Uh... me???" And then they'll say, "No, that is incorrect The only correct answer is, of course, a LEMON!" Fuuuuuuck you, riddle. 120
Kirk Howle @kirkhowle.bsky.social · 11/09/2026Maybe I wouldn't mind people blasting loud music from their cars if the music they liked wasn't the worst sounding shit I ever heard. 141
Kirk Howle @kirkhowle.bsky.social · 11/09/2026This obsession with two buildings that have been gone for 25 years is a sickness. Why create these ghostly false idols of capital? I thought it was the people we were supposed to be remembering, but instead we're fetishizing the place where they worked. 010
Kirk Howle @kirkhowle.bsky.social · 08/09/2026How did the boneless chicken grow this, and upon whose onus is the bonus bone behovest??? 000
Kirk Howle @kirkhowle.bsky.social · 08/09/2026Whoa, the new Pac-Man: Spirits of Chaos looks AMAZING! His spherical yellow body has never looked more spherical. And the ghosts, wow, they look like real ghosts. 050
Kirk Howle @kirkhowle.bsky.social · 07/09/2026I have "Stone Cold" on DVD. It's a surprisingly good/schlocky ripoff of Cobra. It's also fascinatingly homoerotic. 121
Kirk Howle @kirkhowle.bsky.social · 05/09/2026Yessir, that was me back then: young, dumb, and full of pretty good kid logic. 020
