iiinova — where your digital self keeps evolving

Karrie @karriehiggins.bsky.social · 21/08/2026

I am sorry for not being here. I have been exhausted. This happened earlier in the week. Please keep the fundraiser going. I have a lot of health expenses, as you can imagine. I cannot access the funds w/out proof of medical cost!

Preliminary hearing = a success!
My hypnotherapests charges were
Judge Blanch denied a defense request to readdress detention due to claimed
"failing health."
William Draney will remain in jail.

Arraignment:
September 11th 9:00 AM MST
9 counts:
1st-degree felony forcible sodomy
11 counts:
2nd-degree felony forcible sexual abuse

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Karrie @karriehiggins.bsky.social · 02/08/2026

Did I post this yet? I had a little photo essay up at this link: tinyurl.com/y9p3ny7d (Just an FYI but this is not really the space to attempt to defend a certain three-letter cult masquerading as a modality.)

Karrie and her sister in front of the Christmas Tree, wearing matching red velvet dresses with white tops underneath. Text: A couple of years after my DID diagnosis, my mother died & I took custody of her photos. There are very few pictures of me except in the Twin Photos.

Karrie and her sister wearing matching Strawberry Shortcake dresses on the 1st day of school. They are standing on the driveway with their lunchboxes. Text: I showed them to my IFS therapist & told him about Vanishing Twin Syndrome. "My mother told me I was a surprise, said. "I was not supposed to be here." "For years, I thought I ate my twin in the womb."

Karrie and her sister wearing matching Christmas sweaters at their paternal grandmother's house. Their grandmother holds Karrie up and Karrie is crying. Text: He said I was possessed by Unattached Burdens. The alters felt like vanished twins because they were foreign entities. "Therapy" = EXORCISM

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Karrie @karriehiggins.bsky.social · 29/05/2026

Today is Hope in Action and we need URGENT water repairs on our home for my health! The disaster grant program is out of funds. The loan program forces us to do multiple other repairs for the "redevelopment zone." FEMA denied us. Please share! helphopelive.org/campaign/159...

Help Hope Live
Trusted Medical Fundraising®
HOPE IN ACTION FOR
Karrie Higgins
Part of the Midwest/West Catastrophic Illness Fund
HELP KARRIE
Family and friends of Karrie are raising money for the nonprofit Help Hope Live to help fund uninsured medical expenses.
On May 29, in honor of Hope in Action, your donation will go further than ever:
Help Hope Live will cover the credit card fee for all donations made at helphopelive.org!
Contributors can be sure donations will be used to pay or reimburse medical and related expenses.
To make a tax-deductible donation to this fundraising campaign, scan the QR code or go to helphopelive.org and use the gray "Find a Campaign" box to search for Karrie.
GIVE TODAY
Tax-Deductible Donations
Verified Medical Need
Nonprofit Administers Funds Raised Donate or Share! Everything Helps!
hope
in Action
DONATE HERE!
Donations made in honor of a specific individual, or in response to campaign solicitations, are restricted by region only and do not obligate Help Hope Live to allocate funds towards a specific individual, as the IRS would deem such donations to be private gifts, which are not tax deductible. Clients receive support according to their medical and financial need. Help Hope Live is a 501(c)3 nonprofit. Information: 800.642.8399.

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Karrie @karriehiggins.bsky.social · 29/05/2026

Today is Hope in Action! Please don't let this be like the other Help Hope Live special days where everyone breaks records on their fundraisers & mine fails. I've had rain INSIDE my home & need urgent help w/disaster repairs - no FEMA or state aid! Tax deductible! helphopelive.org/campaign/159...

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Karrie @karriehiggins.bsky.social · 28/05/2026

Got help rewriting the Help Hope Live -- a trusted 501c3 that provides DIRECT MUTUAL AID from all $ raised in my name! Tomorrow is Hope in Action & we are seeking help with care + home repairs that are affecting my health! Tax deductible! #MutualAid SHARES help! helphopelive.org/campaign/159...

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Karrie @karriehiggins.bsky.social · 15/05/2026

I get to finally use all the footage from the "this is how a pile of trash became a real mountain" piece and mmmm here is the Gazette sometime in the 80s comparing it to a CO foothill lmao It got bigger after the Flood of '08 cause they opened the landfill back up to bury the debris.

old newspaper photo of Mt. Trashmore from downtown Cedar Rapids. The caption reads "Cedar Rapids 'mountain' Mount Trashmore, a manmade hill, resembles a Colorado foothill when viewed looking south along First Street East from E Avenue and the Interstate 380 bridge.

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Karrie @karriehiggins.bsky.social · 19/04/2026

I donated my halo crown today. I loved it, but every time I wore it, I heard my ex therapist telling me I was wearing it “wrong.” (I wasn’t; they just did not understand a halo crown is NOT a tiara.) I don’t like to think of that abusive jerk ever so … crown will bring someone else joy.

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Karrie @karriehiggins.bsky.social · 13/04/2026

one of my spinal cord drawings substack.com/@karriehiggi...

drawing of spine and brain in ultramarine ink on parchment, illuminated in gold, with a tidal wave flowing out the back washing a molar into the spinal cord

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Karrie @karriehiggins.bsky.social · 05/04/2026

Sewed Sinead onto my railroad stripe overall dress for fun & so I could wear at the visibility event, but then I could not go. I also sewed one onto my therapy dress I shared before!

railroad striped overalls dress with several patches of birds, Virginia Woolf, Sylvia Plath, Sinead, Flowers, cats

a patch of Sinead O’Connor smoking a cigarette and sitting on her knees while wearing a “Recovering Catholic” t-shirt

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Karrie @karriehiggins.bsky.social · 29/03/2026

Found this in Mom's things cleaning up and clearing stuff out. Old pic from 2004 in Portland when I lived there. Rose Garden. I do not remember ever looking like that! I feel I should be in a band lol. Looking verrrrry early aughts.

Karrie at 29 years old posing with her mother in the Rose Garden in Portland, Oregon. They are standing next to a bush of pink roses. Karrie has a short bob haircut and highlighted brown hair. She is wearing an orange t-shirt with a plaid shirt unbuttoned over it and jeans. She has her arm around her mother, who is short with short white hair, and stands with her arms crossed over a red t-shirt.

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Karrie @karriehiggins.bsky.social · 26/03/2026

Meanwhile the hearing aid guy invoiced me yay! I still have to pay shipping and insurance but this was cheaper than Phonak but I lost the warranty so there’s that. Although txt would not let me copy paste it all — it got stuck. So I had to just write in the total I paid sorry.

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Karrie @karriehiggins.bsky.social · 11/03/2026

Got my premium paid for this month from a kind donation and also mailed off the hearing aids with my fingers crossed to that guy in Kansas who fixes them a little cheaper ... nervous about that but $$$. Picked up some GF food. Here is the insurance receipt! I gotta post it at HHL, too.

Wellmark Premium paid $393.15 private information is blacked out!

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Karrie @karriehiggins.bsky.social · 07/03/2026

Posted this earlier but got behind here ... at work on an accompanying one about my father's cars & cloud formations scrapbook where he wrote about being a child laborer & his depersonalization was evident. tinyurl.com/7fdyww4v

notebook written in code with a collaged clipping from a magazine that says Broken Promise - white text overlaid reads this is not a craft essay

Last week, I discovered old essay drafts written and revised between the fall of 2013 and sometime in 2019, with aborted attempts at revision every year until 2024, when a psychologist at a local hospital barged into my room and shouted WHO IS FRONTING?

He shoved a clipboard at me and asked me to map my alters, “My guess is you know some of them and not others.”

This memory is faraway, out of body. Audio cuts in and out. Frames of the film strip are snipped, images disjointed. I feel nothing recalling it. I relied on notes to reconstruct it.

I did not answer. I could not answer.

“I do not think this is who you are, but what you have become.”

Karrie went from a who to a what. Unless she fused into a single identity, he said, she could never have purpose. She could not be a real person. She could not be a writer. He had just read The Strange Flowers and called it brilliant. Now he called it a symptom. My essay is part of my permanent psychiatric record.

That was how I found out he had diagnosed me with Dissociative Identity Disorder.

“Imagine how much better a writer you would be if you integrated?” (Integration does not mean fusion, but he meant fusion.)

I think it is the opposite: Imagine how much better a writer I can be if I resist pathologizing the way my system writes.

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Karrie @karriehiggins.bsky.social · 26/02/2026

Also I posted earlier ... I got burned cause mmmm my glass cracked apart in my hands. Literally the bottom fell out of the glass. It's a clean, perfect circle, like when Bugs Bunny sawed off Florida lmao. I am burned but ok. Took a bit to realize I had been burned.

the bottom of the glass mug that fell out

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Karrie @karriehiggins.bsky.social · 18/02/2026

This. I really could use those Instacart cards my god I am so underweight … anyway I have a wishlist with Instacart cards … if anyone wants the link. Maybe grocery buddies still exist? (No advice. I don’t need it thx)

Kendra
@SurvivingCFS
Follow
I feel like food insecurity is one of the bigger issues disabled people face but is the least talked about.
Not having money, not having the ability to cook every day, not having help getting groceries, or just not having help at all can lead to malnutrition and disordered eating, as we train our bodies to require less and less calories to get through the day. So many disabled people living in poverty are *so* hungry and I feel like this isn't talked about enough.

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Karrie @karriehiggins.bsky.social · 07/02/2026

the receipt and thanks again and I will get thank yous where I can as well!

email confirmation of registration to An Infinite Mind Healing Together conference

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Karrie @karriehiggins.bsky.social · 05/02/2026

I wish people cared about trafficking, CSAM, CSA and sexual assault victims enough to fund our care. Attached is NOT an Epstein File. That is my SLC hypnotist. Lit community called me a liar for that. Anyway, please donate to my fund: helphopelive.org/campaign/159...

totally blacked out police report from the SLCPD

SALT LAKE POLICE DEPARTMENT
GENERAL OFFENSE HARDCOPY
REQUEST TO ACCESS PUBLIC RECORDS
(1199-0 SEX ASLT-FREE TEXT)
GO# SL 2014-48832
UNFOUNDED
Narrative Text
Type INITIAL R/O
Author M04 - Choate, Jennifer
Related Date Mar-26-2014 12:57
This is a possible sexual assault investigation which occurred at S.
The subiect,
is a practicing Hypno-therapists and the
victim,
was a patient of
I met with
at the Public Safety Building located at
475 S. 300 E. regarding some information he wanted to share about hypno-therapist,
he had been seeing for the last 3 days.
indicated he became uncomfortable with
hypnotism practices.
said after confiding in his friend today he felt he needed to report the incident to the police to at least have
it documented.
said he met
while he was working at Costco. He said
had
come through his check-out line as a customer a few days ago.
He said
presented him with a business card after asking him if he would be interested in making more money?
said he took
business
card and made contact with
inquiring about the job opportunity.
said he responded to
place of business located at
S.
said
this is also where
is currently residing.
proceeded to give him some sort of eye test as well as what
described as an I.l. test.
upon completion of the test
told him he was a genius and should be a hypno-therapist, indicating he could help him achieve this goal.
said
indicated was fine.
process was vaque due to the fact to take.
said he recalls
also said
as a child.
asked him if he could do hypno-therapy with him to which
said some of what occurred during this
had given him some sort of pill telling him he craved the human touch.
told under hypnosis he had revealed he had been abused
said
continued to practice some different therapy techniques
told him to go to his room, room all of his
clothing, and wait for him.
always made sure to tell
him not to do anything he was uncomfortable with.
I asked
if he was
ever forced to do anything he did not want to with indicated he was…

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Karrie @karriehiggins.bsky.social · 03/02/2026

this is why your trans friends don't get book deals

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Karrie @karriehiggins.bsky.social · 01/02/2026

A sweet friend of mine coordinates fundraising for this family that got deported to Venezuela. My friend has severe ME/CFS and so any shares help take a load off for my friend as well! Please share far and wide! Indira needs help.

HELP A
FAMILYTO
SAFETY
Indira and her three kids have been homeless and hungry since being deported, and now that the situation in their country is escalating, their best chance of survival is to leave. Can you help us get them to safety?
PASSPORT
1 Adult passport: 216 usd
Passports for each of the 3 children: 164 usd each
Total: 708 USD
Paypal: @Edgar060484
Venmo @Popwink (note plane emoji)
$Cashapp @Frigale (note plane emoji)

Help a Deported Family Survive homelessness in Venezuela.
Indira is a single mother who was deported with her 3 children to Venezuela. Indira's health is becoming dangerously bad. Prices have skyrocketed and food and shelter are hard to attain. The children are barely sleeping from the fear and threats they are enduring!
Please contribute and circulate for their survival!
Venmo @popwink (note star emoji)
Cashapp $frigale
Paypal @edgar060484

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Karrie @karriehiggins.bsky.social · 01/02/2026

But nobody is interested in ordinary victims of ordinary traffickers. You are not in interested in victims at all. BTW that image? That is not from the Epstein files. That is from the hypnotherapist who assaulted me in Utah. Ordinary victims face this, too. You just don't know that.

a police report all blacked out, every single line

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Karrie @karriehiggins.bsky.social · 25/01/2026

Again: ONLY PHONAK can change them in this model. Here is a screenshot from my phone this time (larger text). Spouse was on his way there to drop them off. I had to tell my audiologist to direct my spouse back home & I would be dropping out of things due to this cost.

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Karrie @karriehiggins.bsky.social · 13/01/2026

Epistemic Injustice is a Nonconsensual Relationship with God -- latest on the newsletter, about the intersection of my DID with spiritual & other abuse I have experienced in the mental healthcare system. Free writes for my class that are becoming more. #TherapyToo open.substack.com/pub/karriehi...

soviet Vertushka phone with no dial and no number pad, textoverlaid says: Epistemic Injustice is a Nonconsensual Relationship with God karriehiggins.substack.com

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Karrie @karriehiggins.bsky.social · 13/11/2025

I always described this one as my "coming out" essay because it exposed my #neurodivergence in a vulnerable way I had never done before, BUT I had no idea it exposed the inner world of my #DissociativeIdentityDisorder until a decade later, in 2024 ... open.substack.com/pub/karriehi...

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Karrie @karriehiggins.bsky.social · 02/11/2025

I swear I just chom chommed the couch lol, but she rolled all over it so now it's FURRY... Meet Victoria Lord Buchanan aka Niki Smith! This is the little black kitty we suspected was abandoned. We were right! Not a feral! No chip, free cat. We love her.

little black void kitty with yellow eyes on the back porch before we brought her inside. she has a white spot on her chest

little black void kitty lying on a blue velvet couch, exposing her belly, which has a crescent moon of white on it

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Karrie @karriehiggins.bsky.social · 31/10/2025

Annnd a generous donor made this happen!!! I just sent $100 to my friend who is in need of food aid because of the SNAP shutdown. Thank you so much!!!! So happy I could match that donation. A thank-you is incoming as well!

$100 payment sent on Paypal. I redacted the name for the privacy of the recipient!

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Karrie @karriehiggins.bsky.social · 30/10/2025

Hunger is a public health issue.

HACAP Hunger Vital Sign™ Survey
This short survey asks questions to help us understand if you're having trouble getting enough food. Not having enough food can affect your health and how well your cancer treatment works. Your answers will help us give you better support and care. Everything you share is private and only used to help you.
Date:
I/We worried whether my/our food would run out before
I/we got money to buy more.
Often true
Sometimes true
Never true
The food that I/we bought just didn't last, and I/we didn't
have money to get more.
• Often true
口
Sometimes true
• Never true
Patient may complete the survey once a week
STAFF complete OTHER SIDE

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Karrie @karriehiggins.bsky.social · 19/10/2025

Help a deported family survive! My friend is in touch with this family and has been raising funds for them. Thx for shares!

Help a Deported Family Survive!
Indira is a disabled, Indigenous abuse survivor. Her and her three children were deported to the streets of Venezuela and are now struggling to consistently get food and shelter.
The children have begun school! They need food every day and currently can't get it. That's where we come in!
V
@popwink (note star emoji)
P
@edgar060484

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Karrie @karriehiggins.bsky.social · 04/09/2025

Here's mine. Pretty, too! To me, it is quite sweet with the 4 dates. Might be too much for me with 10 but YMMV. Didn't do it on purpose ... thought it had said 4 lol. I had a little extra batter and also made a mini loaf.

banana bread loaf with sliced bananas baked into the top. text overlay reads "fresh baked buckwheat GF banana bread ... so good"

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Karrie @karriehiggins.bsky.social · 01/09/2025

Years ago when I lived in SLC, I found a newspaper clip about my mother winning an archery tournament when she was 18. I asked her about it, and she kinda acted like it was NBD, maybe a little surprised I had found it. 1/

Black and white photo of three young white women in early 1960s fashion with their archery bows and arrows. My mother is on the far right with short curly hair.

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Karrie @karriehiggins.bsky.social · 30/08/2025

My Grandma Ashline -- fiery Irish side of the family -- knew what was what lol. Her t-shirt says: "How do I spell UNEMPLOYMENT? R-E-A-G-A-N." She's holding my niece here & we both LOVE this one cause we both hate Reagan with the fire of a thousand suns.

A red-headed old lady holding a baby girl in a red velvet dress. The old lady's t-shirt says, "How do I spell UNEMPLOYMENT? R-E-A-G-A-N."

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Karrie @karriehiggins.bsky.social · 26/08/2025

Interpretations by Mourid Barghouti

A poet sits in a coffee shop, writing.
The old lady
thinks he is writing a letter to his mother, the young woman
thinks he is writing a letter to his girlfriend, the child
thinks he is drawing. the businessman
thinks he is considering a deal, the tourist
thinks he is writing a postcard. the employee
thinks he is calculating his debts.
The secret policeman walks, slowly, towards him.
شاعرٌ يكْثبُ في المقْهى.
العجوز، ظلئه يكثبُ رسالة لوالدتِه،
المُراهِقة، ظنتهُ يكتب لحبيبته،
الطفل، ظنهُ يرسم،
التاجر، ظنَه يتدَبْرُ صفقة،
السانح، ظلهُ يكثبُ بطاقة بريديَّة،
الموظف، ظله يُخصي ديونه
رَجُلَ البوليس السريّ،
مشى نحوَهُ ببْطء!

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Karrie @karriehiggins.bsky.social · 24/08/2025

Where are my Long COVID friends at?

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Karrie @karriehiggins.bsky.social · 23/08/2025

In my mom's photos (scanning 100s for a slide show at her memorial), I found one with a view out grandma's window in Geneva Tower (low-income apartments). I am writing about this find as a follow-up: Breaking Generational Curses when the Curse is a Crypt open.substack.com/pub/karriehi...

Two white men having an intense conversation while standing near a window showing a view of downtown Cedar Rapids.

The same year Grandpa died, when I had just turned six and Grandma was losing her memory, we started playing a little game. I would ask where Grandpa was, and she would point the ash end of her menthol cigarette toward the window. "He's out there-—on the roof of Armstrong's Department Store, where he worked for thirty-five years. Don't you remember?" She would speak in a flat, hypnotized voice, as if my question were a cue that sent her into a dream.
I would walk to the window and lean over the heating vent. The Armstrong's Department Store roof was visible from there, and I looked for glints of sunlight reflecting off the glass box Grandpa's body was resting inside. He was wearing a tuxedo with a rose pinned to the collar and white gloves on his hands. He was put there because of his long years of excellent service to the company, perfectly preserved. When I was fifteen, I asked my mother about the roof, and she said there was no such case there, not even with an empty suit inside it, much less a body. Grandpa was buried at Cedar Memorial, just like all the other relatives. She took me to see it. It was winter, and a few inches of snow had just fallen. His marker was one of those small, flat ones that press into the ground—not a stone, just a piece of metal with his name engraved, and the only way to locate it was to find the large stone for a different family, nearby. When we found it, we brushed away the snow and left a flower on top of the marker. I wished I had never asked. The glass case on top of Armstrong's was better.
But the thing was, I had seen the body on the roof. I had seen the glints of sunlight on the glass case, the hands folded across the abdomen, the crisp white shirt and black tuxedo. And Grandma had seemed so sure. Even now, when I think about Grandpa, I think about that casket. But I still believe it. I still imagine him inside the glass, pink-cheeked and peaceful under the sun.

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Karrie @karriehiggins.bsky.social · 19/07/2025

That’s my county … I can be denied shelter and aid under this law and I am disabled so I already cannot access many shelters! Please share. You saw what happened in Texas … now imagine reducers saying “nah, not you. Go die,”

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Karrie @karriehiggins.bsky.social · 16/07/2025

Little Moop & Dorian Lord with a bad case of ennui.

A short hair tabby lying upside down with her head snuggled close to a fluffy part-Maine Coon kitty. Both cats have expressions of boredom and ennui.

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Karrie @karriehiggins.bsky.social · 04/07/2025

This time it's not my creation! Got them from another creator a few years ago .... I thought this was one I did a trade for, but now that I think about ... it might have been a steep discount ... can't remember now! I just know I got them somehow way cheaper than they ought to have been.

Karrie in baggy overalls covered in patches of owls, fairies, frogs, mushrooms, etc. Karrie is seated on the porch cross legged with their cane leaned against the house that desperately needs a power wash.

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Karrie @karriehiggins.bsky.social · 04/07/2025

Yes I sewed another fucking bird on it lmao ... I have another with bunnies and fairies. The bird makes me laugh cause I lived in Portland for so long.

Karrie wearing funky green cateye glasses, pigtails, and a striped dress with a burd sewon on it.

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Karrie @karriehiggins.bsky.social · 04/07/2025

One of my faves to wear cause I like the sounds of the skirt swooshing and the feeling of it scrunching when I sit down!

Karrie wearing a taffeta hot pink skirt, black suit jacket, and tie with a cropped tee that says Mrs. Darcy

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Karrie @karriehiggins.bsky.social · 04/07/2025

I know the tank doesn't match well, but it was like 6:00 AM and we had to head to the hospital. I had like 5 minutes to dress. I was waiting for a ride here. But I wore something similar to this frequently to therapy. Maybe different colors.

Karrie dressed in baggy jeans with a bird patch sewn on them, a green, over the shoulder cropped sweatshirt with a giant crescent moon necklace, and green bag. Also a ginormous iron cross on beads.

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Karrie @karriehiggins.bsky.social · 04/07/2025

This thread shows how I dress and at the end I will tell you how the abusive ex-therapist described my clothing for 99% of my appointments. Most of my clothes are used or purchased on deep clearance or I made them or altered/upcycled them.

Karrie wearing a railroad striped skirtall and black & white striped arm socks and leg warmers with green tennies.

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Karrie @karriehiggins.bsky.social · 03/07/2025

They sold our lives for autographed MAGA merch.

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Karrie @karriehiggins.bsky.social · 13/06/2025

From The Bad Place, where i wanted to check coverage. This is a brilliant visual by Alan Jackson that we cannot see in the trial stream. #FreeKarenRead

Microdots v
@DropMicrodots
It's not being shown on the stream, but for every point Alan Jackson makes, a notecard appears on the screen, and then is dropped onto a large stack behind it, visually reinforcing the massive amount of reasonable doubt in this case. #KarenRead

flash card with note: Dr. Welcher's recreation confirms the taillight was broken at One Meadows Ave

blurry image so text is not readable, but it shows how the index cards for reasonable doubt are piling up on the screen

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