iiinova — where your digital self keeps evolving

mia ⋆⭒˚.⋆ @jurincals.bsky.social · 24/08/2025

i might just be the unlucky charm of this family because those are the greatest people i know yet they keep on being forced to live through hell dealing with terrible circumstances and evil people and i feel like somehow I'm the source of all that's bad

140

mia ⋆⭒˚.⋆ @jurincals.bsky.social · 24/08/2025

not kidding when i say that i might actually decide to end myself soon living was not made for me and it's becoming more and more apparent with each day idk how to even describe this feeling i know with my entire body and soul that i have to escape

220

mia ⋆⭒˚.⋆ @jurincals.bsky.social · 23/08/2025

haven't been this suicidal in years icl

041

mia ⋆⭒˚.⋆ @jurincals.bsky.social · 05/08/2025

she's gone and idk if my brain fully processed it just yet

360

mia ⋆⭒˚.⋆ @jurincals.bsky.social · 03/08/2025

woke up to her getting up to get food and water on her own cleaning herself and even playing with my headphones and her chestnut toy a little which makes me both happy and sad

170

mia ⋆⭒˚.⋆ @jurincals.bsky.social · 03/08/2025

since i kind of get to pick the date of her passing I've been trying to settle for the most meaningful number but i just dk

150

mia ⋆⭒˚.⋆ @jurincals.bsky.social · 01/08/2025

I've been trying to control my crying by watching silly stuff that makes me laugh bc crying non stop every day and night already gave me a migraine but for some reason i feel guilty when i laugh i feel like a bad person for being able to disconnect at a time like this

150

mia ⋆⭒˚.⋆ @jurincals.bsky.social · 01/08/2025

if i had the money I'd get all the memorabilia thalt they're selling at the cremation centre but i can barely afford the cremation itself n thr bank won't let me takr a loan like i can't even get her a proper urn rn bc of how expensive the daily vet visits are

240

mia ⋆⭒˚.⋆ @jurincals.bsky.social · 01/08/2025

i wapnt to get one of thosr voice boxes thst they put in plushies fill it with recordings of my sunshines lil noises n put it in my childhood teddy but ones tht support digital audio so hard to come by....

140

mia ⋆⭒˚.⋆ @jurincals.bsky.social · 01/08/2025

don't have the time to order a paw print kit so I just made some salt dough but nowi need to find a way to seal it to make itlast forever n not mold also idk how to get a 2d paw print asap and i need to get it tattooed

220

mia ⋆⭒˚.⋆ @jurincals.bsky.social · 31/07/2025

this is truly the worst thing to ever happen to me up until now and going forward i wholeheartedly believe that this is the biggest tragedy i personally could possibly ever go through losing her is my biggest nightmare unavoidably coming to life and i fear that I'm not even at peak heartbreak rn

3110

mia ⋆⭒˚.⋆ @jurincals.bsky.social · 31/07/2025

we're gonna have to put her down probably next week ish I've been preparing for this very moment 2 whole years and it still feels unreal what do you mean one day she'll just stop existing forever

050

mia ⋆⭒˚.⋆ @jurincals.bsky.social · 30/07/2025

she doesn't feel like eating but her breathing got better she purrs when i pet her n shes been drinking a good amount of water n finally got up to go to the litterbox which is honestly such a relief it means that at least her kidneys are still doing their job

2100

mia ⋆⭒˚.⋆ @jurincals.bsky.social · 30/07/2025

i hope that when the day comes i won't have to once again argue about whether i should or shouldn't cremate her idc how stupid people find it the same way they always visit their loved ones graves i can't imagine moving across the world one day without her by my side i just can't

010

mia ⋆⭒˚.⋆ @jurincals.bsky.social · 30/07/2025

i have to take her there again tomorrow for more tests but overall she's in a bad shape knowing for 2 years that your best friend could get worse at any moment and you might have to make the decision to put her down doesn't help whatsoever no matter how long you've got u just can't prepare for it

010

mia ⋆⭒˚.⋆ @jurincals.bsky.social · 30/07/2025

one thing that I've always hoped for was that i would find my forever partner before my cat passes so that I'd have someone to reminisce with someone who i wouldn't have to explain to just how precious she is cause they'd know it first hand someone that i could share the memory of her forever

240

mia ⋆⭒˚.⋆ @jurincals.bsky.social · 30/07/2025

I'm in agonising amounts of sadness

010

mia ⋆⭒˚.⋆ @jurincals.bsky.social · 30/07/2025

i hate the fact that everything around keeps on moving the world just keeps spinning regardless

150

mia ⋆⭒˚.⋆ @jurincals.bsky.social · 30/07/2025

and now i have to wait 6 more hours while she's at the vet to find out if she's okay literally all i want rn is ti die

130

mia ⋆⭒˚.⋆ @jurincals.bsky.social · 30/07/2025

i have to wait 4 more hours for the vet clinic to open with the knowledge that those might be thw last 4 hours i get to spend with her i feel sick

130

mia ⋆⭒˚.⋆ @jurincals.bsky.social · 30/07/2025

i genuinely don't know what to do my cat's breathing weirdly she's 17 got diagnosed with an inoperable tumour 2 years ago got told that she had no more than a month left given no meds usually when she's in pain it's because of constipation but it's never caused her to breathe like this

110

mia ⋆⭒˚.⋆ @jurincals.bsky.social · 29/07/2025

why can't my cat just magically get better

240

mia ⋆⭒˚.⋆ @jurincals.bsky.social · 29/07/2025

everyone always says that 3dtwt was toxic and whatnot but i preferred it much more over there it felt much more real and immersive and the toxicity part was just not accurate for me since I've always surrounded myself with nothing but kind mutuals

160

mia ⋆⭒˚.⋆ @jurincals.bsky.social · 29/07/2025

est 700cal please let me keep it this way it's already too much

020

mia ⋆⭒˚.⋆ @jurincals.bsky.social · 29/07/2025

i just wanna be skinny like I'm not asking for much

0101

mia ⋆⭒˚.⋆ @jurincals.bsky.social · 28/07/2025

apparently everyone on here is below bmi 20 but me awsm

590

mia ⋆⭒˚.⋆ @jurincals.bsky.social · 27/07/2025

i feel so incredibly unloved by everyone in my life it hurts

0120

mia ⋆⭒˚.⋆ @jurincals.bsky.social · 26/07/2025

does anyone have like a favourite site/app/doc/system/video whatever recourse it is that they use for learning languages specifically german

350

mia ⋆⭒˚.⋆ @jurincals.bsky.social · 26/07/2025

not proud of how much i ate today ngl

042

mia ⋆⭒˚.⋆ @jurincals.bsky.social · 25/07/2025

stacked up on low cal fruit juice popsicles recently and they've been saving my fat ass from the midnight munchies i have one or two if I'm feeling freaky <50 cal per tube like it's a dream

040

mia ⋆⭒˚.⋆ @jurincals.bsky.social · 24/07/2025

everyone being so invested in love island makes me wanna tune in as well lmao but idk if i can handle this much straightness and nonsense

6120

mia ⋆⭒˚.⋆ @jurincals.bsky.social · 24/07/2025

crying cause why did i get mistaken for a 16 yo twice this week v.v

160

mia ⋆⭒˚.⋆ @jurincals.bsky.social · 24/07/2025

installed a fasting app that i've never heard of before and having the timer of how long you've been going for but also how long ago was ur last fast in the notifications bar at all times rlly puts it into perspective n is quite motivating +it doesn't have those dumb limits of how long u can fast fr

2101

mia ⋆⭒˚.⋆ @jurincals.bsky.social · 24/07/2025

feel like a walking corpse ngl certainly don't look like one but

040

mia ⋆⭒˚.⋆ @jurincals.bsky.social · 24/07/2025

had boba and half a baguette with shrooms n cheese and it felt fat as hell but idec anymore I'm running on no sleep lots of fasting and walking this week and even more stress let a girl eat and nap :|

040

mia ⋆⭒˚.⋆ @jurincals.bsky.social · 24/07/2025

my favourite nurse took my blood too I'm truly winning today she even recognised me n was all sweet v.v

120

mia ⋆⭒˚.⋆ @jurincals.bsky.social · 24/07/2025

finally a gentle doctor doing my ultrasounds oml

120

mia ⋆⭒˚.⋆ @jurincals.bsky.social · 24/07/2025

my car sickness is so unbearably bad i already deal with nausea and motion sickness on a daily two decades in and i still haven't figured out how to deal with it kill me

160

mia ⋆⭒˚.⋆ @jurincals.bsky.social · 24/07/2025

so jealous of americans for all their sports events i like the vibe of going to watch anything but football/soccer matches/races whatever but i can't find a single one locally :/

150

mia ⋆⭒˚.⋆ @jurincals.bsky.social · 23/07/2025

waiting years for bo to release inside did NOT make waiting for him to release another special now any easier

130

mia ⋆⭒˚.⋆ @jurincals.bsky.social · 23/07/2025

breaking a 25hr fast for a bowl of leftover puree what a sad world we live in

020

mia ⋆⭒˚.⋆ @jurincals.bsky.social · 23/07/2025

the biker in a tight black long sleeve that i just walked by knew what he was doing is all I'm gonna say

040

mia ⋆⭒˚.⋆ @jurincals.bsky.social · 23/07/2025

went to 3 separate thrift shops and they had ZERO non skinny jeans ?? recession indicator

090

mia ⋆⭒˚.⋆ @jurincals.bsky.social · 23/07/2025

manifesting cute baggy jeans at the thrift store today 🤞

040