jonmccurley123.bsky.social @jonmccurley123.bsky.social · 03/10/2026If I was a doctor “Go up north and get A bag of cheese from a gas station” 000
jonmccurley123.bsky.social @jonmccurley123.bsky.social · 03/10/2026Have the aliens heard the sound of music soundtrack 000
jonmccurley123.bsky.social @jonmccurley123.bsky.social · 02/10/2026Cant wait til I tell aliens what working on ladders is like and they listen and then the leader alien steps forward, bows its huge head down to my level and is like “this which you have informed us of is not fair” 010
jonmccurley123.bsky.social @jonmccurley123.bsky.social · 02/10/2026Can not wait til I tell aliens what working on ladders is like and they listen in dismay and the leader alien responds like “that is not fair!” 000
jonmccurley123.bsky.social @jonmccurley123.bsky.social · 25/09/2026German word describing the moment you realize you are within walking distance to a healthfood store 030
jonmccurley123.bsky.social @jonmccurley123.bsky.social · 25/09/2026Just heard a witch cackle and I look down the street there’s someone sweeping 000
jonmccurley123.bsky.social @jonmccurley123.bsky.social · 25/09/2026Checking bluesky drafts before getting on a subway like checking how many bullets left before going in a hospital full of mutatnt nurse knives …or whatever videogames are like 010
jonmccurley123.bsky.social @jonmccurley123.bsky.social · 25/09/2026dufferin night bus out there somewhere right now flooring it 000
jonmccurley123.bsky.social @jonmccurley123.bsky.social · 25/09/2026ads like “Going to throw away your mouldy washing machine?” Ha ha nice try algorithm but you’re gonna have to try harder than that 010
jonmccurley123.bsky.social @jonmccurley123.bsky.social · 25/09/2026Checking bluesky drafts before getting groceries like in a videogame when you check your ammo before entering a grim abandoned hospital or whatever happens in videogames 000
jonmccurley123.bsky.social @jonmccurley123.bsky.social · 24/09/2026Ghost creeping up sees the horrendous meal I’m cooking with these vegan hotdog weiners in a frying pan and silently backs away 000
jonmccurley123.bsky.social @jonmccurley123.bsky.social · 22/09/2026Need to tell a European person i had a $8.44 croissant today 020
jonmccurley123.bsky.social @jonmccurley123.bsky.social · 22/09/2026Today installed a banner at an A.I. conference and the banner said like “Put AI agents to work without losing control” Appreciate how horny 010
jonmccurley123.bsky.social @jonmccurley123.bsky.social · 22/09/2026Today I witnessed the topic of discussion change to basketball then 4 men stopped working, went into the hallway, and proceeded to talk only abt basketball for 1 1/4 hours 010
jonmccurley123.bsky.social @jonmccurley123.bsky.social · 19/09/2026On leisure activities being baby stuff but made expensive, A live band is playing the chicken dance in the distillery district rn through enormous sound system 010
jonmccurley123.bsky.social @jonmccurley123.bsky.social · 19/09/2026Houseguest had nightmare theyre being sucked backwards into evil abyss, I had nightmare was being sucked backwards into evil abyss, time to get mould removed 130
jonmccurley123.bsky.social @jonmccurley123.bsky.social · 19/09/2026I just saw gb jones walking a dog, today gonna be cool 000
jonmccurley123.bsky.social @jonmccurley123.bsky.social · 19/09/2026Couldn’t find moisturizer told you there’s a ghost 020
jonmccurley123.bsky.social @jonmccurley123.bsky.social · 19/09/2026Apparently guy who invented Dubai chocolate is enormous nerd 010
jonmccurley123.bsky.social @jonmccurley123.bsky.social · 17/09/2026Broken watch today, this morning said it was 46:00, apparently now 7 hrs later it is 43:00 001
jonmccurley123.bsky.social @jonmccurley123.bsky.social · 15/09/2026I’m eating lunch within a historic display right now 000
jonmccurley123.bsky.social @jonmccurley123.bsky.social · 14/09/2026Another challenge for poet laureate capture Hearing piano being practiced while going very tired through an old apartment building while carrying large bag of smelly waxy cardboard 000
jonmccurley123.bsky.social @jonmccurley123.bsky.social · 11/09/2026UAP this UAP that, meanwhile tiny pure white bug with triangle shape crawls through 100 yard stare directed at filthy ass subway floor at 8pm no dinner 000
jonmccurley123.bsky.social @jonmccurley123.bsky.social · 10/09/2026Them: H- Me: Can’t talk, I’m online bidding on 19 authentic photographs of the Apollo moon landing in slide format so I need to concentrate so that I bid at the precise last possible second and my WiFi is bad because I haven’t paid the bill for my cellular phone 030
jonmccurley123.bsky.social @jonmccurley123.bsky.social · 10/09/2026did I tweet abt this already, I listened to blood hound gang 000
jonmccurley123.bsky.social @jonmccurley123.bsky.social · 09/09/2026Life is literally running around Mario land getting depleted by some random enemy until you eat a vegetable and your health goes back up 000
jonmccurley123.bsky.social @jonmccurley123.bsky.social · 09/09/2026Therapist that’s like “Have you tried listening to Peter and the wolf?” 010
jonmccurley123.bsky.social @jonmccurley123.bsky.social · 09/09/2026Good thing don’t have car be driving to whitby for like big ceramic foot 000
jonmccurley123.bsky.social @jonmccurley123.bsky.social · 08/09/2026at the office where everyones giggling all the time, currently noticing something coming from the direction of the other room, it is giggles 000
jonmccurley123.bsky.social @jonmccurley123.bsky.social · 05/09/2026Just got approached by men on the street to join them and like join their construction company 020
jonmccurley123.bsky.social @jonmccurley123.bsky.social · 04/09/2026Imagine my distant relative like caveman distant could see me eating grapes, cashews, and prunes right now …each its own bowl 010
jonmccurley123.bsky.social @jonmccurley123.bsky.social · 04/09/2026Again, 83 year old Felix said “It’s just meat” When unable to find family tombstone 000
jonmccurley123.bsky.social @jonmccurley123.bsky.social · 04/09/2026Unsure abt astrology but someone who loves vegetarian food got 3 flat tires today 010
jonmccurley123.bsky.social @jonmccurley123.bsky.social · 04/09/2026Electrical tape as phone case bad 000
jonmccurley123.bsky.social @jonmccurley123.bsky.social · 04/09/2026Just got bonked by a chestnut and look up and there’s a squirrel in the tree 010
jonmccurley123.bsky.social @jonmccurley123.bsky.social · 03/09/2026fell asleep with tik tok looping on full sized iPad resting upon forehead 000
jonmccurley123.bsky.social @jonmccurley123.bsky.social · 02/09/2026Correction maybe it’s funny because Felix wasn’t stressed enough he was walking around the cemetery sort of unconcerned and like careless explaining how bodies are meat to himself out loud 000
jonmccurley123.bsky.social @jonmccurley123.bsky.social · 02/09/2026Remembered in England with Felix (83 y/o) we went to find Felix’s moms grave which hed never seen, he kept saying it doesn’t matter where shes buried, to him the body doesn’t mean anything, “it’s just meat” Clearly really stressed wandering around the cemetery like it’s just meat… it’s just meat… 020
jonmccurley123.bsky.social @jonmccurley123.bsky.social · 01/09/2026Ate large Cookie Air con broken 27 degrees Can’t think 010
jonmccurley123.bsky.social @jonmccurley123.bsky.social · 30/08/2026at the cne with a headache ordering kraft dinner smoothie Small child overhead me say “oh god” 000
jonmccurley123.bsky.social @jonmccurley123.bsky.social · 28/08/2026Discovered part of reels where ppl suggest best anti depressant is bike riding to work it’s not 020
jonmccurley123.bsky.social @jonmccurley123.bsky.social · 28/08/2026Let’s see AI spend this much time on vinted 020
jonmccurley123.bsky.social @jonmccurley123.bsky.social · 27/08/2026Like this tweet if you’d like whoever invented bluetooth to have a bad day 020
jonmccurley123.bsky.social @jonmccurley123.bsky.social · 27/08/2026In a park, two Professional? dresses party planners walk up, ask if we could watch their stuff but said “we’ll be around, over there, or further afield” Excuuuuuuse me, further afield?? Keep that out of real conversation please! 000
jonmccurley123.bsky.social @jonmccurley123.bsky.social · 25/08/2026Ate a “blondie” bar at 1am and today feel like an iron bar, that is connected to the centre of the earth, is going up through all of the rocks up into my brain 010
jonmccurley123.bsky.social @jonmccurley123.bsky.social · 25/08/2026What abt a high quality velvet pouch that you put your leftovers in They’re so important 000
