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Jasmijn

@jasmijnwellner.nl
42 followers 34 following 419 posts
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Jasmijn @jasmijnwellner.nl · 04/10/2026
BlueSky search results for the query MrBeastiality. There are three results.
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Jasmijn @jasmijnwellner.nl · 21/09/2026
A stock photo group of happy people jumping in the air, with an inset of Nigel Farage crying
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Jasmijn @jasmijnwellner.nl · 30/08/2026
"Don't worry, we'll only let applicants in if our Ouija board tells us they were victims of CSA involving animals!"
An FBI spokesperson defended the changes as providing flexibility for unusual cases, including applicants who experienced sexual abuse involving animals as children.

“Any polygraph changes reflect a clear difference between a disqualified applicant who has engaged in criminal behavior, versus an applicant who may be subject to further evaluation based on rare exigent circumstances,” the spokesperson told CBS.
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Jasmijn @jasmijnwellner.nl · 29/08/2026
This sounds pretty reasonable to me. I don't have a journalistic background or anything, though, so YMMV. (Screenshot taken from cbc.radio-canada.ca/en/ombudsman..., quoting from an open letter by Brodie Fenlon, General Manager and Editor-in-Chief at CBC.)
In our coverage, you will see multiple references to terrorism. You will hear the acts described as terror. You will hear that governments, including Canada’s, have designated Hamas a terrorist organization. And you will always hear those terms attributed to governments, officials, authorities, experts and politicians.

Attribution of the word ‘terrorist’ has been our policy for decades — mirrored by other news organizations such as the BBC, AP, AFP and Reuters, among many others. Our focus is to report the facts of such atrocities with accuracy, clarity and detail; to convey the scale and scope of violent acts wherever they occur; to quote the people affected, and to convey the views of officials and experts on these events. We bear witness. But CBC News does not itself designate specific groups as terrorists, or specific acts as terrorism, regardless of the region or the events, because these words are so loaded with meaning, politics and emotion that they can end up being impediments to our journalism.
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Jasmijn @jasmijnwellner.nl · 23/08/2026
↑ shot ↓ chaser
Picture of J. Michael Bailey
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Jasmijn @jasmijnwellner.nl · 28/05/2026
Copyright and trademarks work differently. I think if Tolkien's estate would try to argue that anyone would buy BotR because they thought they were buying LotR, they would be laughed out of court. Now, if I were to publish a book called The Lord of the Ring under the pseudonym J.R. Tolkien... 1/2
A parody of J.R.R. Tolkien's
"The Lord of the Rings"
Bored of the Rings
by the Harvard LampoonThe authorized edition
of the famous fantasy trilogy
The Lord of the Rings
Newly revised, with a Special Foreword by the author
J.R.R. Tolkien
The Fellowship of the Ring
The Two Towers
The Return of the King
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Jasmijn @jasmijnwellner.nl · 21/03/2026
FBI
@jaboukie

Just because we killed MLK doesn't mean we can't miss him.
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Jasmijn @jasmijnwellner.nl · 21/03/2026
"one fear": a drawing of a guy in sunglasses wearing a t-shirt that says "one fear", from Teen Comix #1 by Branson Reese
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Jasmijn @jasmijnwellner.nl · 13/03/2026
yeah... there were signs
Pete Hegeseth installing a sign reading "Department of War"Giant banners of Booker T. Washington, Catharine Beecher and Charlie KirkGiant banner reading USDA with a portrait of TrumpA US Geological Survey map of the Gulf of Mexico reading "Gulf of America"
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Jasmijn @jasmijnwellner.nl · 10/03/2026
If you cannot live without Harry Potter,
Red-tinted close-up of Obama
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Jasmijn @jasmijnwellner.nl · 05/03/2026
Y'know, I'd hope at least the Pirate Party were ACAB, but apparently even our pirates love the cops... (Translated from Dutch:) Pirate Party Nijmegen More cops is fine, but preferably not Special Investigations Officers. They don't have enough lawful powers to make a difference [to improve safety].
Piratenpartij Nijmegen

Meer politie is prima, maar liever geen BOA's. Zij hebben niet voldoende bevoegdheden om daadwerkelijk het verschil te maken.
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Jasmijn @jasmijnwellner.nl · 08/11/2025
I gotta include the role play exercise b/c it's bonkers. Who is this for? Why is it all about "spanking the monkey" at work?
Exercise 2: Role Play

In this exercise, you’ll practice using the idiom “spank the monkey” in a conversation with a partner. Choose one person to be the boss and one person to be the employee. The boss will confront the employee about being caught “spanking the monkey” at work.

Boss: “I need to talk to you about something serious. I received reports that you were caught ‘spanking the monkey’ during work hours.”

Employee: (respond appropriately)

Boss: “This behavior is unacceptable and will not be tolerated in our workplace. If it happens again, there will be consequences.”

Employee: (respond appropriately)

Practice this role play several times, switching roles each time.
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Jasmijn @jasmijnwellner.nl · 08/11/2025
Doing important writing research
Practical Exercises for the Idiom “spank the monkey”

Now that you have a better understanding of the meaning behind the idiom “spank the monkey,” it’s time to put your knowledge into practice. These practical exercises will help you master using this idiom in everyday conversation.
Exercise 1: Fill in the Blank

In this exercise, you’ll be given a sentence with a blank space where the idiom “spank the monkey” should go. Choose the correct word or phrase to complete each sentence.

I can’t believe he was caught (blank) at work! A) sleeping B) eating C) spanking the monkey D) working. Correct answer: C) spanking the monkey.
The boss was furious when he found out his employee had been (blank) on company time. A) napping B) playing games C) spanked the monkey D) taking calls. Correct answer: C) spanked the monkey.
I heard John got fired for (blank) during his lunch break. A) smoking B) chatting with coworkers C) spanking himself D) watching TV shows on his phone. Correct answer: C) spanking himself
Sarah couldn’t concentrate on her work because she kept thinking about (blank). 	A) her upcoming vacation B) her favorite TV show C) spanking the monkey D) her to-do list. Correct answer: C) spanking the monkey
Exercise 2: Role Play
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Jasmijn @jasmijnwellner.nl · 28/10/2025
@thomasav.bsky.social 1) Not a Dem 2) Not even an American 3) I've neither said nor do I believe that a better world is not possible. I just don't think Michael Hobbes criticising the New York Times is what's holding us back here. 4) You can disagree with me, just don't do this kind of shit to me.
Tommy Valdez (@thomasav.bsky.social) I love it when Dems say shit like, "A better world isn't possible," so they can justify not trying.
Quote tweeting: Jasmijn (@jasmijnwellner.nl) The NYT has 11.9 million subscribers, and many more regular readers (I couldn't find the numbers for that in less than five minutes). Most of those aren't leftists or even particularly progressive. If all leftists and progressives stopped talking about the NYT, it would not even make a dent (2/2)
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Jasmijn @jasmijnwellner.nl · 27/09/2025
Alternatively,
Abolish ICE
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Jasmijn @jasmijnwellner.nl · 27/09/2025
Release the Epstein files
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Jasmijn @jasmijnwellner.nl · 11/09/2025
Hell yeah!
Lesbian pride flag (the orange-pink version with seven stripes)
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Jasmijn @jasmijnwellner.nl · 10/09/2025
Far right groups and individuals are supporting the new flag-raising movement, including Conservative and Reform MPs.

Edited from the original by image manipulation, as if it were an essay graded by a teacher.
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Jasmijn @jasmijnwellner.nl · 23/08/2025
Alright, that's enough internet for me.
Two BlueSky posts. The first reads: "I’m still on Twitter but on a bunch of occasions recently I’ve seen viral posts that quickly get overrun by paid for blue checks pushed to the top of the pile who rant about “race mixing” or “the Jewish question” or gay marriage. It’s not really useful for making new friends."  The second is a reply by Thomas Chatterton Williams that reads: "Social media beyond maybe IG is not for making friends"
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Jasmijn @jasmijnwellner.nl · 03/07/2025
Excuse me?!
Excerpt from Wikipedia, reading: "In 1893, Howard Kelly, a gynecologist and pioneering urogynecologist, invented an air cystoscope which was simply a handheld, hollow tube with a glass partition.[1] When the American Surgical Society, later the American College of Surgeons, met in Baltimore in 1900, a contest was held between Howard Kelly and Hugh Hampton Young, who is often considered the father of modern urology.[2] Using his air cystoscope, Kelly inserted ureteral catheters in a female patient in just 3 minutes. Young equaled this time in a male patient.[3] So began the friendly competitive rivalry between gynecologists and urologists in the area of female urology and urogynecology. This friendly competition continued for decades. In modern times, the mutual interest of obstetricians, gynecologists, and urologists in pelvic floor problems in women has led to a more collaborative effort."
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Jasmijn @jasmijnwellner.nl · 30/06/2025
The Democratic party to trans people:
Extreme close-up of Barack Obama's face, from the "then perish" meme
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Jasmijn @jasmijnwellner.nl · 16/06/2025
BlueSky you can't get my hopes up like that
Screenshot of BlueSky trending topics. A zoom blur makes everything unreadable except "Trending" and "Stephen Miller"
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Jasmijn @jasmijnwellner.nl · 11/06/2025
A screencap from Scooby-Doo 2: Monsters Unleashed. Fred Jones is looking angrily at the camera. The caption says "I Think Coolsville Sucks"
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Jasmijn @jasmijnwellner.nl · 28/04/2025
Text: "Talk of an epidemic may be overblown, but"
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Jasmijn @jasmijnwellner.nl · 15/04/2025
There's a setting for it. You can literally call the default branch whatever you like!
A screenshot which reads:

Default branch name for new repositories
main
GitHub's default branch name is main. You may want to change it due to different workflows, or because your integrations still require the historical default branch name of master.
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Jasmijn @jasmijnwellner.nl · 22/01/2025
A red coloured picture of Barack Obama
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Jasmijn @jasmijnwellner.nl · 21/01/2025
Same happens on Tumblr, where it is called "pissing on the poor".
A tumblr post by user drakensberg that reads: "The reading comprehension and overall common sense on this website is piss poor."
User poupon reblogged it and added: "how dare you say we piss on the poor"
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