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tony hawk's prolapse @ivnob.bsky.social · 27/09/2026

RE: ella langley, once you hit your 30s the hot 100 becomes none of your business. get ready to learn sun ra, buddy

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tony hawk's prolapse @ivnob.bsky.social · 25/09/2026

i don't care if you bring coffee to an interview as long as it's coffee-flavored coffee, o-KAY?

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tony hawk's prolapse @ivnob.bsky.social · 25/09/2026

"watchmen" making that tv show list is so bewildering that i can't really engage with it further. it's like someone telling you the sky is green

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tony hawk's prolapse @ivnob.bsky.social · 21/09/2026

justin herbert is the perfect quarterback for the shortform video era, a guy who shines in 90-second "he's a PROBLEM" compilations and absolutely nowhere else

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tony hawk's prolapse @ivnob.bsky.social · 20/09/2026

funny to bring up ICE because "i support legal immigration but not illegal immigration" led us there the same way "keep boys out of girl's sports" will lead us god only knows where

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tony hawk's prolapse @ivnob.bsky.social · 20/09/2026

doing the viral homer simpson challenge (eat 64 slices of american cheese in one sitting)

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tony hawk's prolapse @ivnob.bsky.social · 18/09/2026

this one lives rent free in my head

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tony hawk's prolapse @ivnob.bsky.social · 16/09/2026

"deadliest warrior" was the funniest show ever. one guy would shoot a pig carcass with a 16th-century cannon and another guy would analyze it on a laptop and solemnly say "that would be a fatality on the battlefield"

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tony hawk's prolapse @ivnob.bsky.social · 16/09/2026

keep dinner on the stove. me and the boys have donnie yen surrounded, i should be home soon

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tony hawk's prolapse @ivnob.bsky.social · 14/09/2026

spoken word over a slightly slowed down "funky drummer" break and this is doing numbers on college radio in 1990

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tony hawk's prolapse @ivnob.bsky.social · 12/09/2026

yes, we affirmed the fascists' belief that trans people are weird and scary but we had to do that to get a one-term senator. that's just good pragmatic politics.

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tony hawk's prolapse @ivnob.bsky.social · 08/09/2026

SMU's coach has the name of a righteous gemstones character

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tony hawk's prolapse @ivnob.bsky.social · 08/09/2026

[pamtheoffice_samepicture dot jpeg]

monsignor martinez, the hero from a show within a show on king of the hill. he is a catholic priest pointing two guns at somebody

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tony hawk's prolapse @ivnob.bsky.social · 07/09/2026

"requiem for a dream" and "american history X" both blew my mind when i watched them as a teen and when i revisited them as an adult they came off as well-made after school specials. i wonder what other movies are like that

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tony hawk's prolapse @ivnob.bsky.social · 07/09/2026

did elizabeth holmes always look like a haim sister?

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tony hawk's prolapse @ivnob.bsky.social · 07/09/2026

palestinians aren't allowed in the big tent but chiropractors and homeschool parents who sell supplements on instagram are. cool!

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tony hawk's prolapse @ivnob.bsky.social · 01/09/2026

i saw a trailer for this that starts with a baby doing a double take as scrooge walks by. we could be in for a historically bad movie here

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tony hawk's prolapse @ivnob.bsky.social · 21/08/2026

the AI breakfast burrito is a very succinct metaphor for how every business resents the idea that it has to give you something in exchange for your money

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tony hawk's prolapse @ivnob.bsky.social · 17/08/2026

saving you a click: loki (seasons 1 and 3 only) punisher warzone jackie chan's first strike wake in fright veronica's closet (seasons 2 thru 4) cube dwyane wade's the cube the hand that rocks the cradle crash (the racism one) tank girl the friends of eddie coyle crash (the fetish one) madame web ray

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tony hawk's prolapse @ivnob.bsky.social · 15/08/2026

the death penalty for anyone who does a weepy stripped-down cover of a dance song

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tony hawk's prolapse @ivnob.bsky.social · 15/08/2026

looked up how many guys played for both bay area teams and both chicago teams (seven altogether) and learned that goose gossage was one of them somehow

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tony hawk's prolapse @ivnob.bsky.social · 14/08/2026

pronouncing "prilosec" like it's the surname of a croatian basketball player

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tony hawk's prolapse @ivnob.bsky.social · 12/08/2026

francesca hong's tweets about thanksgiving taking more heat than graham platner talking about how much he loved murdering people really confirms a lot of priors about americans

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tony hawk's prolapse @ivnob.bsky.social · 09/08/2026

going back in time to the 2011 nba draft to tell enes kanter right after he gets picked third overall that he washes out of the league before age 30 and ends up getting paid by dark money pedophiles to go on twitter and tell the WNBA "i identify as an attack helicopter LOL"

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tony hawk's prolapse @ivnob.bsky.social · 08/08/2026

welcome to the WNBA draft, enes freedom! just enter the green room right here:

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tony hawk's prolapse @ivnob.bsky.social · 06/08/2026

society would genuinely be better off, in some small way, if caitlin clark was 5'3 and had astygmatism

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tony hawk's prolapse @ivnob.bsky.social · 06/08/2026

bill gramatica watching this with a thousand yard stare

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tony hawk's prolapse @ivnob.bsky.social · 05/08/2026

well now who's going to make music for guys who post peaky blinders memes

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tony hawk's prolapse @ivnob.bsky.social · 02/08/2026

the other 29 teams' strategy for beating the dodgers

homer simpson visualizing himself defeating heavyweight champ drederick tatum: an announcer tells us "a congenital heart defect has apparently felled tatum moments before he could step into the ring"

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tony hawk's prolapse @ivnob.bsky.social · 01/08/2026

albums that would be perfect except i always skip one song when i listen: outkast's aquemini ("mamacita") björk's post ("it's oh so quiet")

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tony hawk's prolapse @ivnob.bsky.social · 01/08/2026

we gotta give the dodgers back to the mccourts

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tony hawk's prolapse @ivnob.bsky.social · 25/07/2026

maggie cheung was so attractive in "the heroic trio" that someone made a movie about casting her in a movie based on seeing her in "the heroic trio"

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tony hawk's prolapse @ivnob.bsky.social · 24/07/2026

he wants to beat the celtics in the playoffs one more time before retiring

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tony hawk's prolapse @ivnob.bsky.social · 23/07/2026

watched the "avengers doomsday" trailer. no madame web. what's the point?

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tony hawk's prolapse @ivnob.bsky.social · 19/07/2026

i unalived the sheriff, but i did not pew-pew the deputy

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tony hawk's prolapse @ivnob.bsky.social · 18/07/2026

please to announce my latest culture war grift, an adaptation of the odyssey starring only our favorite greek actors: - stav - john stamos - nia vardalos - CGI telly savalas

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tony hawk's prolapse @ivnob.bsky.social · 15/07/2026

england are a great ship of theseus case example in that you can swap out the manager and entire generations of players and they will still lose exactly like that every time

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tony hawk's prolapse @ivnob.bsky.social · 15/07/2026

michael wacha made the all star game?

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tony hawk's prolapse @ivnob.bsky.social · 05/07/2026

every world cup people talk about brazil like it's still 2003 and get shocked when this happens as if this isn't who brazil has been for the last 20 years

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tony hawk's prolapse @ivnob.bsky.social · 05/07/2026

in light of recent events a belgium victory would be the funniest outcome so i have to root for that

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