iiinova — where your digital self keeps evolving

danielle @impudentearworm.bsky.social · 13h

I grew up with "thou God seest me" being used to guilt-trip into good behavior. Framed on the wall kind of stuff. The message of THAT is so different than the ACTUAL context in Genesis 16:13 I genuinely didn't even realize it was the same verse until I was today years old

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danielle @impudentearworm.bsky.social · 25/09/2026

To follow up on this: found out the neighbor across the street from the land trust has several cows and one is his pet and he just randomly lets it loose in the field at the land trust, often unaccompanied, and this wreaks havoc. The tracks were this far apart bc the thing was GALLOPING

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Reposted by danielle

danielle @impudentearworm.bsky.social · 15/11/2024

It's time for Dawseycore fall. Get in losers we're wearing well-mended wool and pining respectfully

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danielle @impudentearworm.bsky.social · 23/09/2026

Client: "did you ever figure out how to log into my banking??" You mean with the one-time passcode that expired and was only ever on your phone that you didn't give me? No, I didn't

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danielle @impudentearworm.bsky.social · 21/09/2026

[Discussing clothing with my pastor's 20yo] Me: women's shirt sleeves are never long enough for me 20yo: isn't there a standard length? Me: nope! Not how women's clothing works 20yo: then what about your arm measurement, don't you know it? Me: I do, but women's clothing isn't made like that 20yo: 😦

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danielle @impudentearworm.bsky.social · 18/09/2026

BOY when someone is not a super-smiley person and their entire face lights up when they see you... that is uh, flattering

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danielle @impudentearworm.bsky.social · 09/09/2026

Brother's girlfriend: "ugh, can you just marry [local farmer with event venue]" Me: no thanks. So you can have access to the wedding venue, right? BGF: 😩

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danielle @impudentearworm.bsky.social · 07/09/2026

Complimented my pr's special needs 17yo on his train track set-up and he replied "you're welcome"

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danielle @impudentearworm.bsky.social · 05/09/2026

Baking with ulterior motives [matrimony]

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danielle @impudentearworm.bsky.social · 02/09/2026

Back at the land trust temporarily this week and a staff member asked me "so how did you get involved" and I politely said "volunteering" instead of A YEAR AGO TODAY YOUR HOT COWORKER WAVED AT ME

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danielle @impudentearworm.bsky.social · 30/08/2026

[Toddler smacking metal parking lot sign] The dad: Thomas, err, Samuel, uh, DANIEL! Daniel stop doing that"

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danielle @impudentearworm.bsky.social · 29/08/2026

Boomer woman at farmstand: why don't you buy some cheesecake, it's in individual portions so you don't have to feel bad Me: oh I don't feel bad at all, I just make my own cheesecake [and don't want to buy yours]

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danielle @impudentearworm.bsky.social · 29/08/2026

My pastor opening game prompt: "oh no, Danielle would hate this" [prompt was to make hand-goggles at other drivers and get them to do it back at you] 20yo: "17yo's hat is a flag code violation" Me: I know, I wasn't going to say anything 20yo: I know, you were making your flag code violation face

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danielle @impudentearworm.bsky.social · 28/08/2026

Perma-muted texts from the factory client bc dude has no compunction about texting at 5am or 11pm

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danielle @impudentearworm.bsky.social · 27/08/2026

I'm totally fine, really, you can tell because I came home and have made FIVE admin phone calls to avoid feeling anything

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danielle @impudentearworm.bsky.social · 16/08/2026

Absolutely DELVING for red flags and so far the worst thing about this guy is that he likes cheap light beer but he doesn't even drink it bc gluten so that's like what, a beige flag?

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danielle @impudentearworm.bsky.social · 11/08/2026

Hot land steward on tech: but this is how everything goes. Eventually you'll have to log into something to use your own dvd player and watch your own dvds Me: then maybe that's the point at which I no longer need a dvd player. HLS: Maybe the dvd player needs YOU

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danielle @impudentearworm.bsky.social · 11/08/2026

A 3pk of lettuce, 7oz jar instant decaf, 1lb corn starch, 3 garlic cloves, 2lbs red onions, 1.5lbs jalapenos, 1lb limes, 1lb lentils, 4oz can green chiles, and 13oz can coconut milk AT ALDI is TWENTY FIVE DOLLARS. Make it stop

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danielle @impudentearworm.bsky.social · 10/08/2026

I saw burrito discourse on the other site and decided to do the math on what I call burrito or enchilada stack. It's the same stuff in a different format so don't @ me

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danielle @impudentearworm.bsky.social · 09/08/2026

Senior from church asked if I was staying out of trouble and I grinned involuntarily. He laughed at me and said, well, you look happy about it (Correct)

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danielle @impudentearworm.bsky.social · 05/08/2026

Selfishly speaking one of the things I look forward to most about the resurrection is BETTER TEETH because holy cow the 1.0 isn't great

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danielle @impudentearworm.bsky.social · 05/08/2026

Desperately trying to find this comic and googled the punchline and what came up? A bunch of results about pee wee Herman. AI search nails it once again

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danielle @impudentearworm.bsky.social · 03/08/2026

Bloodcurdling moment: I am sleeping in my own guestroom for the first time ever bc I forgot to put sheets on my bed and then stayed up late. Incredible, torrential rains. Can't hear a thing other than that. And I get woken from a dream by a knock at the guestroom door (there is no one else here)

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danielle @impudentearworm.bsky.social · 02/08/2026

If you have too much tapioca pudding, it actually makes very decent popsicles

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danielle @impudentearworm.bsky.social · 31/07/2026

"How was your week? What are you doing this weekend? [Follows up on conversation from last week] [insanely bad pun] do you want this antique bottle I found" dear LORD

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danielle @impudentearworm.bsky.social · 30/07/2026

Maybe someone can use ai to filter out all the money-saving "hacks" that are either "stop going out to eat" or "buy the kids meal"

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danielle @impudentearworm.bsky.social · 24/07/2026

Me: eh, that's no skin off my nose Hot land steward: huh, that's good, I'll have to use that. You know what I heard the other day? Pearls before swine. What's that Me: [cracks knuckles in OT] WELL do you know about king David's fancy son Solomon

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danielle @impudentearworm.bsky.social · 24/07/2026

-hot land steward taught me how to drive an old persnickety atv. I refrained from jokes about liking old persnickety things, it was difficult -moved oak log sections for 3 hours -weedwhacked for 3 hours bookended by a 20-minute hike in/out I am so tired I cannot move

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danielle @impudentearworm.bsky.social · 23/07/2026

25yo intern: "yeah one of the most humbling things about growing up [and realizing male privilege] has been mentioning another man to a woman and they're like, he's weird, or he's creepy" (This was after I mentioned i did not care to be around someone we've both worked with) The kids are alright

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danielle @impudentearworm.bsky.social · 20/07/2026

Made/ate mac & cheese with a pack of kraft singles best by 04/2023

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danielle @impudentearworm.bsky.social · 20/07/2026

Realistically I know I won't be able to keep this up, but so far I have successfully refused to contract with any company using an AI slop logo OR attend any events with AI slop posters

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danielle @impudentearworm.bsky.social · 20/07/2026

Another valid reason for tazing would be people who violently bounce their legs in my peripheral vision. There were FOUR AT THE SAME TIME IN CHURCH. THE PEW WAS SHAKING

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danielle @impudentearworm.bsky.social · 16/07/2026

I have finally just gone and designed the shirt I've always wanted. You can have one too, or your dad, whatever inkonmyhands.etsy.com/listing/4538...

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danielle @impudentearworm.bsky.social · 16/07/2026

Coworker: Yeah my dad got picked on in school for being ginger AND left-handed Intern 1: is there a genetic component for left-handedness? Me: yes but also birth trauma is linked Intern 2 [having been underwater for part of the conversation][horrified]: BIRTH TRAUMA can make you GINGER?!

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danielle @impudentearworm.bsky.social · 15/07/2026

Had to explain to the hot land steward what a gender reveal and a tradwife are This is going great

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danielle @impudentearworm.bsky.social · 14/07/2026

Boss: "overpay that bill to the lawyer, it's just going to go into escarole"

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danielle @impudentearworm.bsky.social · 14/07/2026

Fun Twitter thing where I discovered ~50 spam message requests that had been hidden. You can report ~5 before the report feature just stops working.

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danielle @impudentearworm.bsky.social · 13/07/2026

Trying to find the right hair length when 1. Sensory issues demand it remain long enough to be put up 2. Aesthetic preferences rule out very short 3. Concerned it will take forever to grow back 4. WEIRD XIAN BAGGAGE AROUND WOMENS HAIR LENGTH 🫠

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danielle @impudentearworm.bsky.social · 13/07/2026

Marked safe from the poop bacteria (pancakes and wine for dinner)

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danielle @impudentearworm.bsky.social · 11/07/2026

Overheard yesterday: 5yo out to lunch with her dad, aghast: "you mean before I was born you DIDN'T KNOW WHAT MY NAME WAS?"

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danielle @impudentearworm.bsky.social · 09/07/2026

An xmas card I mailed in December 2023 is being returned to me today. ???

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danielle @impudentearworm.bsky.social · 08/07/2026

I have two older neighbors who we'll call Bill and Bob. Bill is soft-spoken, courtly, theatre drama, that sort of thing. Bob on the other hand absolutely is an ADHD enneagram 7, probably on the spectrum, and blurts every thought he has, they are a true odd couple

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danielle @impudentearworm.bsky.social · 08/07/2026

this week: "Oh now that couple married QUITE late, they were in their LATE THIRTIES!"

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danielle @impudentearworm.bsky.social · 02/07/2026

"I learned a fun fact which I know you will enjoy" [proceeds to discuss buzzards and bacteria]

static.klipy.com

Aww Vintage Smile

ALT: Aww Vintage Smile

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danielle @impudentearworm.bsky.social · 01/07/2026

Just swapped my gas stove igniter, a $25 part instead of a new old gas stove ($200 at best plus pickup plus install plus disposal) or a new new gas stove (trash and at minimum $1200 all in) AND IT WORKS THANK YOU JESUS

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danielle @impudentearworm.bsky.social · 01/07/2026

Corollary, just saw a video of a bride being joined by a man in a suit and I was like, okay, I like his look!..... it was her father

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danielle @impudentearworm.bsky.social · 29/06/2026

Signs it's probably time for bed include: scrolling 3 insta videos in a row and going wow, this content is so dumb, what's up with the algorithm, and what's up is that I was on someone's profile

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danielle @impudentearworm.bsky.social · 29/06/2026

Guess who's back and still trying to lowball me

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danielle @impudentearworm.bsky.social · 27/06/2026

85yo I am helping move: "the best place to meet someone is church!" Me: yeah, in theory Her: I suppose there isn't much selection. But you never know! I didn't meet my husband until I was TWENTY ONE!

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